Internation Flight Tips for a 14 Month Old

We travel overseas every year and our daughter has done the trip since she was six months old so I know where you're coming from.

I am very surprised that the airline said no to a car seat. It's fundamental safety for any young child in any kind of transportation. So did they explicitly say "It is not an FAA approved seat so you can't use it"? What reason did they give for no car seat? I note that you say it's not a U.S. airline. I would first pursue this issue with them before anything else; your child really does need to be in a car seat that's strapped IN the airline seat for safety -- all the time, unless he is up walking around with you. I would truly get in the airline's face about this. Honestly, I would never have flown an airline that said my child could not be in a car seat.

Here's why: I've been in turbulence that would have had my kid bouncing like a ball if she hadn't been in a car seat. The adult seat belts on airline seats are NOT adequate for a 14-month-old. Your child will be able to slip around the straps, and will figure out how to undo the belt entirely -- it's easy, you just pull up on one big, flat piece of metal and you're free. You must not hold your child on your lap either unless the airline has given you (or you have bought) a special seat belt attachment that straps the child TO you for flight. That's not a great option for an entire flight.

Same thing with having him sleep on a pillow on the floor. If you encounter turbulence he will not stay put. Items could fall on him from above. A kid in his own, assigned seat, in a car seat that's held in by the airline seat belt, is the way to go for your son's safety.

You will get posts saying "Oh, it's fine to hold him the whole trip" or "He's fine without a car seat in his own airline seat." Well, if you would not hold him in your lap in a car, or let him ride in a car without a car seat, then don't put him in an airline seat that way either. Besides the safety aspect, you won't be able to stop him wriggling and trying to get up and you will get to your destination exhausted and upset.

We fly a non-US carrier and have never been told not to use a car seat.

The airline's trying to placate you with the "you might get a bulkhead seat" statement. Do NOT depend on getting a bulkhead seat, ever. The airlines will tell you it's possible but we got one once in 14 years. Increasingly those seats go to business travelers who are airlines' frequent flyers so those adults get more leg room -- the airlines are more interested in keeping those flyers happy than in accommodating you with your young child. Do ask about bulkhead seating (if you happen to get it, you can let your son walk around in that extra space a few times but do not just let him hang out or sleep there). But do not depend on getting it.

Otherwise: Take extra everything --especially food and drink, because if you have a delay and have to sit in the plane for a few hours (which has happened to us), you must be ready to feed him and not run out! The airline won't just hand you food for him if you're delayed. TSA restrictions mean you can't haul all the liquid you'd want so plan ahead to buy things like juices or water bottles once you are past the TSA checkpoint (which means they'll be expensive but you can't be caught without them if you have to sit on the plane).

Take new things to do and play with that he has never seen before. New books, new little things he can manipulate with his hands, new small toys, something like the "crayon magic" Crayola stuff that lets kids color on special pages with special markers but they can't mark anything else with those special markers (so he can't mark up the tables or seats etc. even by accident). Do not worry about spoiling him -- you really need new, fresh things to distract him. Yes, he'll sleep some of the time but you'll find that he won't fall asleep as easily as you hope and at the times you hope, so having things for him to do helps!

Please do not give him Benadryl or other over the counter meds to help him sleep. Those meds now have a warning on them that the are not intended for that purpose. If he's never had them before, and ends up sensitive or even allergic to them, you do not want to find that out in the middle of an international flight. And some kids are not sedated at all by Benadryl etc. -- it made my daughter wide awake instead, and doctors will tell you these meds get some kids keyed up instead of sleepy. Not worth it.

I would find out reason for no car seat. I would not go without a carseat. I can't believe they said no. Pursue it. 14 month old, 10 hours. No matter how you slice it, won't be fun. Just bring patience lol. I assume it's an overnight flight, so hopefully he will sleep.

We flew back and forth to and from Germany multiple times with toddlers and the bulkhead seats are where it's at. We brought a pillow and asked for a few blankets. Make a spot on the floor in front of your seats. Bring games, on-ear headphones, a tablet, snacks, more snacks, and throw the rules out the window. If you don't usually allow playing electronics, allow it. It will keep kiddo busy. And please, don't allow him to stand on the seats or put the seatback up and down. It's obnoxious for other passengers.

Finally: The best bit of advice: Have kiddo's ears checked 1 week prior to leaving. Make sure he's not congested and has no infections. Even so, ask the doc for a script for a decongestant that is safe to give him. Give it to him once you get on the plane, about 30 minutes before pushback, and give him a bottle or sippy to drink until you reach altitude. Same goes for descent: decongestant 30 minutes before descent, sippy until you are on the ground. It's very hard for kids to relieve the pressure in their ears, so he's going to need your help.

Susan is absolutely right. Take an evening flight.

Whatever you do, buy your child a seat. Everyone will be more comfortable if you do it that way. He can always lay his head is your lap and he can stay buckled in.

I've never heard of a "child fare" in all of my many years of flying.

I've done a similar length trip with three different kids, while pregnant two of the times. It won't be fun. Don't expect your child to sleep much.

I used a car seat once, the other times I'd didn't-they end up kicking the seat in front of them. Do buy a seat just for your kid. If you can, Get economy plus seating. Those extra few inches make a big difference with a wiggly toddler.

Your child should be able to just lay down on the seat and sleep. You may have to share some of your seat, but that's how I've usually done it. If you get plus seating, you may end up with an extra seat as plus doesn't always fill up.

Bring an extra of everything, and lots of snacks.

Also, check the website. They may be telling you you can't use a car seat, but it might not be the actual policy. I'd be surprised if it was. The car seat was easiest with my oldest. But even with the car seat, she didn't sleep a wink! It's far too exciting.

I've done it with and without a car seat. When we didn't have a car seat on a long flight, my little one just laid across his seat with his head on my lap.

Regardless of whether or not you can bring the car seat, you do want to purchase him his own seat.

Did this exact "adventure" with an 8 mth. old that we had just adopted. Nightmare. Best advice, Bring twice the amount of diapers you think you might need. I brought 9 for a 9 hour flight and had to "borrow" 3 on board. He wouldn't/couldn't sleep so he drank a bottle the whole time and we flew through the diapers. Also had long delays which added to the drama. Would also bring benedryl to help him sleep. Experiment before you leave and make sure it helps him relax and doesn't make him hyper which it sometimes does. OR, I would get something from his doctor to help him sleep. Trust me, you do NOT want to be on this flight with a screaming, tired baby. You are now armed with my best tips! Have a safe flight!!

Mel R. has some wonderful comments. Re-read those.

I have flown both ways but only within the US for 3-hour flights to Florida. For one, we didn't buy a seat (he was 9 months old) but we had 4 of us to hand him off to. He slept for a lot of it in my arms but my arm definitely fell asleep and I finally couldn't take it anymore and shifted ever so slightly - then BOOM he was up for the rest of the trip. I also used a car seat on 2 other trips when he was a little older, and it was fabulous. I can't imagine "sleep on the floor" as any kind of option from a safety perspective, and you also have to remember that planes are noisy and have a lot of vibration even if there is no turbulence. Bulkhead seating gives you floor space but ZERO storage space, so absolutely everything you carry on will have to go over your head in the storage unit. I'd talk to the airline again, or talk to AAA Travel service if you are a AAA member.

Remember that you pre-board so you're on the flight even longer than the 10 hours anyway, and if there is a delay and you are sitting on the tarmac, you are completely stuck.

I agree about bringing much much more than you think you need, and you should assume the airline will have absolutely nothing to offer you in the way of drinks or snacks. I packed in a bunch of small plastic bags that I could fish out easily and then toss when empty. You can't take liquids in with you so either prepare to pay high prices once you get through security, or take powdered products (formula, healthy drinks) that will go through okay. I've taken powdered shakes on and they never question it, whether it's in the original container or a zippered plastic bag.

If you still travel without a car seat, consider a squishy pillow or one of those inflatable pillows from the bath store (what people use when they soak in a tub for a long time) - it won't take up packing space and you can blow it up pretty easily. Bring a soft blanket or cloth to cover it.

Yes, all new toys he's never seen before, plus one or two really important security things he loves and is comforted by. Label those things, if you can, with an address label or laundry marker, with your cell phone number so you can get a call if they are misplaced.

I've seen a lot of people take little "goodie bags" for those sitting near them (one row front, 1 row back, 1 row across) with a few candies, gum, disposable ear plugs, and a little note saying "I'm 14 months old and a first time flyer. I hope I don't cause you too much trouble. Here's a gift from my mommy and daddy to make your flight a little sweeter."

Good luck.

i'm pretty shocked that they said no to the carseat, and VERY shocked that they suggested your child sleep on the floor. how on earth could that be safe?
i'd double-check on that. and triple check.
your lap isn't much better. i did that to save money on a relatively short flight, 5 hours, years ago. it was a nightmare. get the baby his own seat, and you can up the arm and let him sleep sprawled on you when he needs to.
khairete
S.

We traveled a lot with our three kids, from birth.
Never used a car seat on the plane. Not only were they not approved, but I'm sure the kids would've been miserable being strapped in one for so long.
It's not going to be fun. At 14 months for sure buy your child a seat, but know that it won't be "child" fare, all seats cost the same regardless of the person's age.
Mine were still nursing at that age, so that helped. They didn't sleep much (I have a hard time sleeping on planes too.) My husband and I spent a lot of time passing our child/ren back and forth, trying to keep them entertained and quiet. We also got up and walked around as much as we could while it was safe.
Obviously pack snacks, lovies, whatever it is that your child likes, and good luck!!!
ETA: at that age they usually just slept on my lap, after nursing :-)

If it is possible, schedule the flight in the evening to arrive at your location in the morning. Then you would all be on a more normal sleep pattern, although you may have to make allowances for jet lag. I find that the people on airplanes are quieter at night, there are less interruptions and it is darker on the plane. Have a safe flight.

When I flew cross-country (8 hours) with my dd around that age, I just let her sleep in my arms. Lol. I read a book or played on my iPad, so I didn't really need to be moving around too much. My husband and I just switched off whenever the other needed a break, and it really wasn't that bad.

I would take along something that he can suck on during takeoff/landing. (Bottle, dum-dum, nurse him... Whatever) I would also say to get a bunch of smaller busy toys, paper, crayons, etc. and sort them into a binder using pencil pouches. That way you can keep a bunch of things handy in an unobtrusive way. :)

Good luck!