I plan to start Potty training my little girl in about a week, she will be 6 weeks old. I have read that this is common in other countries, and think that it would be easier than diaper to potty training. Has anyone heard of this, tried this, or have any thoughts on the subject?
I want to thank everyone for their comments, both positive and negative are good to hear. We didn't start when we had planned, I didn't realize it was so close to Thanksgiving, and with Family and Traveling it wasn't a good time.
Today was our first day. She had done better than I could have hoped for (I tried not to have expectations so as not to be dissapointed)Its almost 2 pm and we have been at it since 6 this morning. Within 1 minute of sitting her down for the first time she Peed. From what I read it has to do with the positioning. For Example, when someone holds her the way I do when I am going to feed her she automatically thinks it is time to eat, same thing with the potty, she will recognize the position and the cues such as a phrase "go potty" or a Song like one person had mentioned. She has been pooping and peeing in the potty all day, I don't spend much time with her their either, typically about a minute. I woke her up from a nap to potty (she'd been asleep for some time and needed to eat) she was very upset that I woke her, but as soon as I sat her on the potty she calmed down and pottied right away, then she was ready to eat. Today is what I will refer to as a "Good Day" I realize that their will be many days that we miss more than we "catch", but I think that this method will work well for us.
I don't plan to be super obsessive about it, we will continue to use diapers, and for now, I don't plan on continuing this in restraunts and friends houses, but I think that she will prefer to go in the potty than in her diaper, and I think that she will be more comfortable for it. One woman commented that a higher percentage of children who are "trained" in this type of manner are more likely to have accidents at an age where they are expected to be fully trained than their counterparts who are allowed to potty train at their own speed. I feel that this could be cause by the type reinforcement used. We are not forcing her to use a potty, she will not be punished when she/we miss, but she will be taught that this is the prefered method. And when she is ready, she won't miss anymore and will wait to be put on the potty. I think the reason that "normal" potty training is so difficult is because the child has been taught to use a diaper, then all of the sudden they are told not to use a diaper when they are already at a point where they understand and can rebell. My little sister is 3 yrs old and refuses to use a potty. they bought her Dora underware and she will simple potty in them and go change her clothes. She will tell you that she does not want to potty in the big girl potty, but will go to a quit corner when she is about to go. As an infant, they are learning everyday, and they have nothing better to do than sit on a potty, they don't have toys or other distractions because no matter where they are they are absorbing what is around them so this eliminates the problem of trying to keep the baby occupied until they go potty.
As far as quality time, Even sitting on the potty is quality time because she is getting physical contact, positive reinforcement and we are communicating with her.
I am very fortunate to be able to stay home with my baby and have the time to do this, and so far it doesn't really seem that more time consuming than letting her poop in her diapes because either way you have to undress them and redress them, the only difference is that now we sit on the potty for a couple of minutes in between. I don't just hold her there and hope that she will go, She gets fussy if she doesn't need it. But Like I said this is our first day, and it is a "good day" so who knows whats to come. The only thing I can do is listen to my baby and do what I think is best for her. This is my first child so I could be way off on this, but so far it seems to be working.
If anyone is interesed in this, there is a book you can order by Laura Boucke "Infant Potty Training".
Thanks again for all your comments, and Happy Holidays!
-A.
I'd love to hear how it goes for you. :) I'm using cloth diapers because I read that it can help with earlier potty training. I've read a few articles covering all aspects of potty training and I think if you have the time and ambition that it is a great idea.
I think that is awesome that you are willing to try "elimination communication"! I don't know why others have to be so negative. I know you can find info about it online so that is where I would look. Good luck and keep us all posted on how it is going! C.
I have heard of int! In China, they train them from birth! They sing to their babies, and every time they sing a certain song, their baby knows it is time to go to the bathroom! I don't know hat I would try this, but it could be cheaper! Good luck, and please let us know how this goes!
Elimination Communication or Natural Infant Hygiene is a pretty alternative approach and mamasource may be a pretty mainstream forum for it. So I'm not sure how much support you'll get here. I did not use this approach (and don't know how folks with two kids close together could with the next born), but I have been to China and seen this in action! Many, many countries don't have diapers. In china, there are little holes cut into babies' pants and they learn very early when to go. It is amazing how it can work.
I know there is a very active yahoo group out there where you can get support. Also, you are in Santa Fe. Do you know where the Mothering Magazine offices are? I would bet you could find someone with info on resources there. And definitely check out the forums on their website!
http://www.mothering.com/discussions/
Other possible resource: http://thebirthingtree.com/
There are definitely products out there to help, too, for situations like car rides, pottying, EC pants for the stages where you both are still learning the cues, etc.
Good luck. I know some parents who swear by this and if you are dedicated, it can work for you.
Oh...and someone mentioned kids not being ready to start training until at least 27 months. But my girls were both fully and completely potty trained by 27 months. It was a gradual process, of course, but it started after the 18 month mark and kept getting better until just after their second birthdays. So it's definitely possible to do it before then!
A., cougratulations on your little one !
I am a full time working mom, and I have a little daughter at home. I got her a potty when she was 4 month old, and started to hold her over it when we woke up every morning. She is five month old now and she poops and pees into her potty every morning. It takes me a minute or less to hold her before she goes. I also asked her baby sitter to hold her over the potty after her naps during the day. She pees into her potty may be 50% of times and it gets better every day.
I am planning to put her into daycare when she is 1 year old, and they do not start potty until 2 years. So I do not care about getting her 100% potty trained ASAP. But I think that some potty training gives her a good start. At least she will know that the potty is about peeing and not about storing toys in it :-). Good luck !
Jen.
Dear A., I am sending you some much-deserved support!
I discovered EC when our first son was 5.5 months old and we had great success. It was not hit or miss or leaning over a toilet all day for me. It was more like noticing that there was indeed a pattern to when he would eliminate (just after waking, while nursing, after eating...and then there was that look when I just knew he was going!) It seems strange to most mainstream moms, but it seemed strange to me to desensitize my child to his basic body functions and teach him to go into what was essentially a paper bag strapped on his bottom. My husband's grandmother laughed when I told her all about "EC". As she said, back in the day, they just called it "saving laundry"! Best wishes to you on the road less traveled! Our DS1 "graduated" at 17 months and we loved not changing diapers! Now, our second son is a whole 'nuther story...
P.S. Be prepared for bumps in the road during major changes like moving, illnesses, teething, trips- but try not to let that end your journey. Also, remember this isn't an all-or-nothing adventure. You can cloth diaper and EC part-time/only when at home/only on weekends/whatever works for your family!
A.,
Congratulations!
I just wanted to give you some more positive feedback. I was 25 when I had my first and I found out about EC when he was 2 months old. I started holding him over a bowl when he woke up and right after he ate. I have never spent more than a couple minutes at a time offering him the potty. If he went great, if he did not need to go he looked away and that was it. He went potty almost everytime though and without any fuss. I LOVE not having to change diapers and I have never had to deal with diaper rash. We never rushed things or pushed him into it. My son is 17 months old and sits on his little potty all by himself now. No, he is not completely potty trained, but he is at the same place as most of the 2 or 3 year olds that I know. He wears cloth training pants or runs around naked when it is just the family. He is a very happy child and anyone who has been around him comments on it.
As for the the comment that you are just "training you" I agree. It think all parents are trained by their kids. When they fuss, we are trained to pick them up and love them or feed them. When they cry, we are trained to change their diaper. I am just trained to respond before my son soils himself, not after. EC is not about pushing or rushing your child, it is about allowing them the same the chance to not have to wear their toliet on their bottom all day. I personally feel that EC it is a less confusing way to raise your child than diapers. They start on the potty and they end on the potty. With diapers they are taught to go whenever, wherever they want and in addition they are taught to ignore the feel of that nasty, harsh body waste against their skin. Then when they get a little older we expect them to not only notice that they are dirty, but the recognize all the feelings and sensitions that we previously encouraged them to ignore.
I am glad that some many people have any opinion on this matter. I just think it is very sad that so many people are convinced that they are right biased on experiences that they have never had or only heard about second hand.
I do not know what your experience has been, but I have never received a negative response from someone who has actually tried EC.
I wish you the best of luck and I offer you all my support 8-)
I'm not sure where you were told that at 6 weeks a child can potty train when they can't even walk, but I have never heard of that. There are a lot of moms on this site who are in a big rush to potty train and I don't get it. Children generally won't do anything they are not ready to do until THEY are good and ready. I would chill on the potty training. Because if you don't see your child doing it on your time, it will only cause frustration.
I have heard of this and knew someone that started their daughter at six months. I don't personally agree with it. Like the other moms said you are basically holding your daughter over the toliet all day. I would think that would be stressful, and time consuming. Wouldnt you rather enjoy your baby with all that extra time. You could use that time to bond and play with her. Why such a rush. Let them be babies. I have three and it goes by so fast. I think potty training is something the child has to understand and accomplish on thier own.
Good Luck :)
***Postive Encouragement***
I think it is great you are willing to go the extra length for your child. It is not only nations who don't have resouces who do this, Japan and S. Korea are not third world countries. My mother potty trained me by 8 months, which cause some distress to my father when I wouldn't go potty in the diaper on a plane. Perhaps 6 weeks is too early for the child to know about potty training, but I disagree about when children have control over their pee and poo. After the first few weeks all my sons NEVER pooped in their diaper during bedtime. I think if your child gets to know a schedule about when you will be putting them on the potty, it will make life easier getting out. After all it works for feeding, why not for potty? Accidents will happen and if you put in the effort it will be worth it.
Frankly, my mom was disappointed when I started potty training my sons at one. She thought it was too late. Incidently, my mother is Korean. I remember her potty training my brother. She was very patient.
Both of my older sons were completely potty trained by the age of two. The oldest rarely has an accident. He is four and hasn't had an accident in the last year and he was very upset about it(We were in the car on a trip) and my Middle son hasn't had a major accident in months. He will be turning 3 next month.
I don't know why some people scoff at the idea. People are willing to work getting their children into a great preschool, but not the constant attention and closeness needed to potty train? For myself, I am lazy, I have my latest son in cloth diapers and believe me, I know when he pees.
It is possible to train at an early age; and yes you will be doing most of the leg work. ie. taking your baby to the potty and waiting until they pee/poo. Is it worth it to you? The issue isn't one of getting rid of diapers or the expense, it is getting close enough to your child to know their functions. BTW, in S. Korea it wasn't about getting babies trained early so they are out of diapers that much faster, it is a fundamental task. We take for granted our child will go to school around age 5, they take for granted their children will be potty trained by a certain age. After all, everybody does it, don't they??
Hey A.
I have to tell you I sat here and laughed a little since you are getting the same “wrath” online that I got when I posed a question about cloth diapering! All I have to say really is go with what YOU want to do! We read a lot on elimination communication before we adopted our son and chose instead to just do the cloth diapering since we travel a lot and flying with a baby is hard enough, going to the potty on a plane is also scary enough for adults let alone an infant! If it is the environment you are looking after remember you can always do the no diapers at home and use cloth when out and about. I did save a few sites that might be helpful. Good luck no matter what you choose!
http://www.naturalfamilyonline.com/articles/potty-infant.htm
http://www.diaperfreebaby.org/
http://www.apconnect.org/InternetCD.htm
www.fuzzibunz.com (great cloth diapers!)
Wow, tough crowd! I realize you posted this a while ago, but I only just now read it. I was wondering how things are going for you? Back when my little girl was born (she's 15 months now!), a friend of mine mentioned that she saw on TV that they do this in other countries, and I meant to research it, but I just got too wrapped up in other things and never got around to it. I think it's a great idea! Obviously it's possible, since other cultures do it all the time. I also think that the time you spend potty training with her IS quality time, and that you can teach, interact, and bond with your baby while doing ANY activity. Potty training is going to be time-intensive no matter when you do it, and it's not like you're somehow neglecting her other needs by doing this. I guess I don't see what the big deal is. And as for 6 week old babies being able to control their bladders, of course they can't! Presumbly the point is that they are just becoming aware of their bodies, and starting to learn to control the other muscles in their bodies, so it would seem to be a fine time to help them start to be aware of this natural function and how it works too. I'd love to hear more about how the "project" is progressing.
- L. M. :)
I have read about this before in a magazine. Basically, it's getting in tune with your baby's responses and noticing subtle nuiances in their facial expressions and so on. By no means will your child be sitting on the potty in a few months, or even a year at that, but you do learn a lot about your baby. The reason why it is popular in other countries, generally with poor economies, is because of the lack of reasources such as diapers and wipes. If they didn't use this "early potty training", they'd be doing an awful lot of laundry! I think it may be more trouble than it's worth, but if you're really determined, by all means! Good luck!
Hi A.
My thought is holding her over the toilet all day is not potty training. Have you tried to change her and she pees with her diaper off, while changing? At 6 wks they have NO control over their bladder. About 2yrs is when they begin to have control, and girls usually earlier than boys. I once knew of a young mom who was have her second one and had 2 under the age of 2 yrs, she thought she was going to get the first one trained by the time the second was born, and I was thing "yeah, good luck with that". My daughter, now 13 did it at 2 1/2, my oldest son, now 12 was 2 months past his 3rd birthday and he said "I have to potty" like a little switch just clicked on in his head. And my youngest son took till he was 3 1/2 for peeing and not till after 4 to do #2 and he is still in pull-ups for bed time (and I started when he was 2). Till they can think, "gee, my bladder is full I need to go sit on the potty" and pull down their undies, let it go there, they are not potty train. So, if you don't have anything else to do all day, have fun. I always had better things to do like house work, shopping, and so on. And like some one else said whats the hurry?
Hi A.-
I actually did hear about that on tv and personally I think it is just ridiculous (no offense to anyone who does do it) there is absoultly no way a 6 week old has control over there bladder it is just impossible and the only reason people say it works is strictly because they hold the infant over the toilet all day which personally I dont know any of my friends who are parents to have the time to hold there infant over the toilet?? Anyone who will tell you they have control does not know the full truth or are being lied too it is just impossible..Why does a 6 week old need to be potty trained?? Why are you in a such a rush?? The mom who said the 18 month old was potty trained sounds a lot more realistic than 6 weeks old..My Duaghter is 18 months old and shows interest in going, but again I dont havea the time to be cleaning up because even as taht Mom said at home they are fine, but they are still too young to be using a potty all the time that is why they are peeing everywhere...
This is jsut my opinion, but I just think that is insane..It is a baby let them be little while you can they grow up too fast..
M.
I also have heard of this but don't agree some kids aren't even ready at 2. I agree you should enjoy your baby when they are so little its stressful enough without potty training so young!
Some research on the topic (source: Dr. Spock's Baby and Childcare) reveals that a higher percentage of children who are "trained" in this type of manner are more likely to have accidents at an age where they are expected to be fully trained than their counterparts who are allowed to potty train at their own speed.
This is just friendly advice I promise. My first thought after reading this is Let her be little. I believe potty training is sometimes a lot for a one year old but six weeks is way young.I have potty trained three children of my own and also I worked at a preschool for two years, the age I taught was 2 and most were not potty trained when they entered my class. I believe potty training is part understanding whats happening. whats going to happen when it fails, it would be h*** o* her if you feel you didn't do something right or if she didn't catch on untill like maybe she is 2 years old. Potty training can be a bit of a stressful thing because it takes a lot of time and patience. My advice is enjoy her being a baby and everything that comes with it including the diapers because it all goes so fast anyway. By the way at 6 weeks congradulations is still in order so congrats, good luck!!
I got this site a while ago, but haven't really had time to check it out. Hope it helps.
http://www.freewebs.com/freetoec/ourstory.htm
INFANTS DO NOT DEVELOP BLADDER CONTROL UNTIL THEY ARE IN THEIR TODDLER YEARS, YOUR DGT WOULD NOT BE POTTY TRAINED, YOU WOULD BE TRAINED....I HAVE NOT HEARD OF THIS BEFORE AND I HAVE 15 YRS OF PEDIATRIC NURSING. GOOD LUCK
Anything can be done. My mom said I was potty trained before I was 1. Not too sure how she did it, but I can always ask her. Let me know how it goes, I would love to know how and if it does work.
I have some friends who did this with both their children and did not use diapers. We affectionately refered to them as the free rangers. Both their children were 100% potty trained by 18 months, much earlier than any of our children or our friends children. From what they said it works but that you need to be at home alot. They really only had problems when they would go out...peeing/pooping at the store, at people's houses, in the car seat, etc.
I've read articles about this. Most parents say it works, but since your child can't get to the potty on their own, you have to constantly watch for signs that they need to. You end up tied to your house. Most kids that are trained this way still are not completely depentent until age two which is the normal age that a child potty trains anyways.
In the research I did, after I started trying to potty train my 20 month old, I found that they really aren't ready to potty train until at least 27 months. And trying to do so before that age can actually set them back.
I am not familiar with what you want to do, but I really don't see how it can be worth it. As a new mom there are so many other things to focus on. I think you would spend so much time trying to get her to the toilet and cleaning up the misses that you would miss out on the really great stuff. I'm sure it sounded like a good idea, but ...
A., as a mother of 4 (3 boys, 1 girl), I have had more than my share of potty training "advice". I personally feel, that the child will use the potty when they are ready. I have never heard of trying to potty train a 6 week old infant. They are just not mature enough for that! How can you potty train if they are not even walking? Diapers are not that bad! Don't try to rush things! Let your baby be a baby! They are growing and changing so much, adding the stress of trying to potty train an infant that isn't mature enough to do so would be devastating! I can assure you that all of my children started school potty trained -- 3 of them went to pre school at the age of 3, so they were using the potty by then. I didn't force them to use the potty before they were ready. I didn't have to worry about "accidents", or constantly running to the potty and sitting them on it, either (my former mother-in-law instructed me to set my timer for 15 minute intervals and sit my children on the potty in order to "train" them. She even went so far as to forbid them visiting unless they were "trained"). I allowed my children's bodies to mature and did not force the issue. It was so much easier for everyone! In fact, I have done the same thing with toddlers that I have babysat for. I wouldn't suggest trying to force an infant who isn't even big enough to sit on the potty, to use it! Let her be a baby! They grow so fast, don't try to speed it up!
I have a close friend that was very successful with elimination training with both of her children. By 9 months both were dry all day. From what I understand it's more about training yourself to be very aware of your child's cues before they start actively eliminating. The way I was told this gradually becomes easier over time and then the child starts to understand what is expected.
Personally, I think it is a big committment for a relatively small reward. However, I didn't cloth diaper my first so my opinion might be off.
M.
Wow! They are really recycling these messages! This child must be a year and a half by now. What was very interesting in all these replies was that nobody mentioned how much better for the earth this would be.
Hi A.,
I actually read a book about this when I started to potty train my daughter and thought it sounded fantastic.Then I found out you basically hold the baby over the toilet constantly. The whole underlying principle is getting to know your baby "well enough" so you know when they have to go. The problem is, babies go as their bladders fill up, not all at once when their bladder is full like we do. And keep in mind it's hard to teach a three year old to know when they have to go, with a 6-week old it would be impossible. So, if you think this will work best for you and your fmaily go for it. But try not to be too h*** o* yourself if you find it's more work then you're looking to take on. Good luck!
P.S. Diaper to potty training is tough, but it's easier to explain the need for a toilet to a 2 year old than a small infant.
I see that it's been a year since your original posting about this! How has the last year gone with EC and your daughter?
I started EC when my son was 6 weeks old and he is now almost 10 months and we're going strong. Most of his poops are in the potty these days and he holds it and lets me know he needs to go!
