Infant Adoption Versus Foster Adoption

Updated on June 09, 2009
D.J. asks from Amarillo, TX
4 answers

After years of miscarriages and infertility, my husband and I have decided that we want to grow our family a different way. We have a five year old biological son, and are very interested in adoption. However, the information out there is pretty overwhelming. We are considering either domestic infant adoption or adoption through foster care. If we go the foster care route, we would like a younger child (probably no older that three). We want our son to be the "big brother." Has anyone been through the process? Can you enlighten me on the benefits and drawbacks of each? Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

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J.H.

answers from Amarillo on

Check out the foster child VERY good, as some have such emotinal problems that may not show on an initial visit, that you will have your hands full of the problems. I know there are some sweet little kids out there that need a home, but for the ones with problems, you don't want to impart that on your child, so just really check out it. My sister-in-law had years of trouble, and counceling etc. after years, things worked out, but they had no idea there was a problem when they took him. And of course they love him, and want him, but just know about what to look for or be prepared for and go into it with your eyes open, that goes for the new borns also, that they don't have alchol syndrom etc. I know there are plenty out there that are fine, I don't mean to put a damper on things, I just want you to have a happy experience

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C.W.

answers from Dallas on

The Foster Adoption is cheaper than the private adoption. I'm not sure if Foster adoption is quicker than infant adoption.

We are foster parents and we've 8 foster kids in our home. Our agency does adoptions, so I can give you their number and you can call and inquire and ask questions. It is All Church Home at 817-335-HOPE.

We are members of the Tarrant County Foster Parent Association and we are having a fundraiser on the 27th of June. At our fundraiser we are the "Heart Gallery" come and display pictures of adoptable kids. If you would like more information on our fundraiser, it will be lots of fun in the Botantical Gardens. You can go to the heart gallery website online also. Fostering is a very rewarding experience. Yes, older kids have some issues. However, if you adopt a baby, you will need to find out what was going on in the home with Mom and Dad. A lot of them are neglect, some are drug users or alcoholic or have domestic violence in the home. Let us know if you have any questions. We've never adopted, however we got really close to doing that. Their is a National Adoption Day, that allows a discount of adoption, however it is only once a year.

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A.S.

answers from Dallas on

We did an infant adoption through a local agency in Dallas. The process takes some time. If you go through any agency,you must type a separate biography for each parent, have a home visit/study done, make a scrapbook of your life for prospective birth moms to view, and there is like a 40 page adoption application. It is very costly, but it was right for us. Alsom going through an agency was best for us because the agency takes care of all of the legal issues involved and it is included in the cost.
I have heard the same about foster care adoptions...look very carefully into it. Especially since you have your own biological son.
We adopted our precious little girl from an agency called Adoption Access in Dallas when she was a day and a half old. It was a fabulous experience from beginning to end! The cost ranges anywhere from 15,000-40,000 depending upon your wants. We drew out of my husband's 401K to finance it. The wait time for a local infant adoption is anywhere from 12 months-2 1/2 years. If you want an older child, the wait is less. biracial/hispanic/african-american is less expensive and the wait time is a little less.
(It sounds like you are buying a car, I know....)

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R.K.

answers from Odessa on

My husband and I went through an agency to adopt our beautiful daughter. She was 2 days old when we went to pick her up. It was a good experience for us. I did not want to do the foster/adopt because, I don't think I could have a child in my home and then for whatever reason have them go back to their family. Infertility is stessful enough without having to worry about this. Also, there are open and closed adoptions. We chose to do the closed adoption for the same reason. I did not want to get close to the birth mom and then have her change her mind at the last minute. The cost was about 15,000. You do get an adoption tax credit back after the adoption is final. I would be happy to talk to you if you have any questions. I know there is a lot of info out there.

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