Incident on the School Bus.

Updated on February 25, 2015
M.G. asks from Olathe, KS
10 answers

I know a lot of you have had this happen with your kids, my older son had similar issues, but sometimes I'm just at a loss for what I should do.

My son was punched in the face on the school bus yesterday afternoon. He says he had his headphones on and was listening to music and it came out of the blue. (Now sometimes we get a little more of the story once people start questioning him, but that's what he told me and then his Dad.) He asked me not to contact the school because it would just make it worse, and I understand him feeling that way. I have left a message for the principle to call me and told her what it was regarding. I just don't see how I can leave it unreported when my son is being attacked, what kind of Mom would I be?? He is having a rough year, it seems like every other day he comes home telling me about this kid or that kid picking on him, calling him names, purposely tripping him...

Ugh, he's in the 7th Grade we've got this year to finish and then another year of middle school!!

Have you had issues like this?

M.

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

So What Happened?

I haven't yet heard back from the school, I know that they have video recorders on every bus, not audio just video. I am going to ask that she get a copy and watch to see exactly what happened.

Thank you for your insight Fulton. I agree about the [email protected]@ kicking. We explained to our son last night that he doesn't have to win the fight, he just has to fight back. He acts as if he doesn't have any fighting skills, we pointed out that when he goes after his older brother (who is 6ft tall and has about 50 pounds on him) he has done some powerful damage!!! We have always told our boys that if we get a call from the school saying "your son was involved in a fight" as long as they didn't start it, they won't be in trouble at home. We know they'll have to face whatever punishment the school sets down.

Featured Answers

C.T.

answers from Santa Fe on

Yes we have been through this. We moved this year and for a couple months my son was being picked on by two boys. When no one was looking they would stomp on his foot, or kick his leg as he walked by, or something like that. He finally got up the nerve to tell me and I told him first to tell the teacher. He did this and the next week he said it was still happening. I sent the teacher an email saying I am extremely disappointed and this is totally unacceptable. I spelled out everything that had been going on as I heard it from my son. That day they called the boys to the principal's office and called their parents. They had them apologize to my son and they brought the counselor into his classroom to do a whole anti bullying program. My son was very embarrassed, but it worked. The bullying stopped and it all blew over. I think it's hard for kids because they do not want to be the "tattle tale" and to be the one looked down on by other kids, but telling the authorities at the school really is the best thing to do. If I were you I would send an email to the teacher, the principal, and to the bus driver/bus management. Get it in writing. Most schools now have a big anti bully program and they will take action.

8 moms found this helpful

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.F.

answers from Las Vegas on

Yes, report it. Violence is not okay, and the sooner this kid (and any others who might be involved) gets checked, the better.

If the adults in charge ignore this, the message they're sending to students is that violence is okay and that the adults aren't going to do anything anyway.

I would absolutely follow up in writing even if the principal calls you today---original letter to principal, copy to counselor, copy to bus driver, copy to the head of transportation. With this letter, you establish a history and timeline, and those in charge are much more likely to get on this quickly and get the behavior to stop.

Best to you and your son

J. F.

4 moms found this helpful

D.B.

answers from Boston on

There are only 2 reasons your son would be afraid that it will get worse: 1) It didn't happen quite the way he said, and he was involved in some way, or 2) there is substantial bullying going on and he is afraid of repercussions.

I agree with zero tolerance for this. Report it and let the chips fall where they may. If the school has to put a bus monitor on problem routs, so be it. Start with the school principal but also contact the district's transportation coordinator if you have one (you probably do - school principals don't coordinate this program but do have jurisdiction over the individual students).

If there's video on the buses, the perpetrator will be caught quickly enough. And actually, any student could report the incident, not just your son. So while you're protecting him, you can also teach him to stand up for others (if not at the moment due to safety concerns, then afterwards with an adult).

4 moms found this helpful

D.D.

answers from New York on

Call the school and the bus company asap. This stuff needs to be documented and the other child needs to be kept away from your son.

As a side note your son could be in equal trouble if he raises a hand to this bully. One of my daughters had issues with a bully in high school and when I went to the school the guidance woman told her that if she gets hit, pushed, tripped, etc not to do anything or she'd be suspended too.

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.C.

answers from New York on

You need to call the head of transportation ASAP! They may have a zero tolerance policy for this kind of behavior. Or at least will threaten his parents that if he behaves inappropriately again, they will have to drive him to and pick him up from school everyday.

You can insist to remain anonymous. Let the kids parents know that she school bus driver ratted him out and they reviewed the video.

Violence cannot be tolerated or ignored.

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

Why does he feel it would make it worse? Is there an ongoing issue with this kid and does he think it would make him more of a target? When I was in HS and my sister in MS, there was a group of girls (cousins) who all rode together. They were bullies and the driver did nothing. They harassed my sister and when I stood up for her, the one girl punched me in the back of the head with her rings. When other kids got off the bus, we would bunch up to prevent the bully girls from sitting with us, and before we got a new driver, it was so bad that several of us asked to be let off at the start of a long country road so we didn't to ride the way around with these bullies. My mom (and other parents) reported the driver and the girls to the bus depot directly so many times they finally got kicked off and the driver was replaced. After that, there was no b.s. and no more problems.

So I get it, but I think you also need to talk with him why he feels it would be preferable to be punched than to have something done about it and if there are any other issues with this kid that you should be aware of. Did your son do anything in return? Did he talk to the driver? Did the driver do anything? Those are things I would want to know.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

O.O.

answers from Los Angeles on

It almost doesn't make sense.
Why would someone punch him in the face out of the blue?
Are you, and can he be, SURE it wasn't a flailing fist/hand/arm that he was in the way?
Best to make sure before you call anyone.
Were any of his buddies there to witness?

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.A.

answers from Kansas City on

Please don't let this go and don't let time pass. Too many bad things are
happening when our children are away from us. I would get to the bottom of it and move on. And if I didn't get a call back very soon, I would show up at the school. Good luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I would definitely ask to see the video. The bus driver should also be managing this. If he/she can't and drive safely another adult should be on the bus to safeguard the kids while they are there.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.H.

answers from Richmond on

call the school again and tell them that since the attack happened on the bus ..they can and will be held legally accountable, and refusing to return phone calls isnt going to cut it..call the superintendent and the principal..at home. then tell them both that they 24 hours to kick your childs attacker out of school or you will do the job for them..with a news crew in tow. the clock is ticking,the longer the school can stall doing something about this childs attacker, the easier it will be for them to shrug their shoulders when the attacker puts your child in the hospital, then they will try to shift the blame on you for "not doing something sooner"..get going, after the dust settles..look into homeschooling..its a lot less stressful , for both the child and the parent. K. h.

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions