Imaginary Friends? - Schaumburg,IL

When my sister was little she had an imaginary friend for a long time and then one day her "dad" got transferred to Florida and we never heard of her again. She grew up to be a totally normal well-adjusted 2nd grade teacher. I think some kids go through this and some don't. Negative behavior is different and discipline but I wouldn't be seeing a psychologist for something that is normal 4 year old behavior.

I also had imaginary friends growing up--2 main ones, I remember their names and what they wore. I was an only child and they kept me company. I think most children have imaginary friends and it is a healthy part of growing up.

Dear N.,
I'm not sure that this will help you necessarily, but I had 3 imaginary friends as a child. I remember having them, so I must've been around 4 years old at the time. My family really remembers! Anyway, I guess I just outgrew them when I started school. And now I'm a successful college art instructor. So I guess what I'm saying is, DON'T WORRY!
I never saw any kind of professional... I think it's pretty normal.
My suggestion would be to get your son involved in some play groups if he's not already in preschool. He probably craves the interaction with other kids. My brother was 6 years older than me and pretty much ignored me. I always played by myself... I'm sure that has something to do with why I had them.
Good luck!

Have you read any Sylvia Browne books? I believe children have such an open mind that they can see things we adults cannot. He may be seeing someone on the otherside. Try to ask questions, like names and dates. Do some research, you might be surprised!

My daughter is 3.5 and has had imaginary friends for a while now. She is an only child, and I think they keep her company. The "friends" never seem to come around when she is at school or at a playdate. Although they join us on outings when its just us.

Your son was in daycare for a long time, so he is used to having kids his own age to play with. Now he is home with you and a baby sister who demands a lot of your time and attention. He is probably just trying to keep himself amused.

I'd try scheduling some playdates and make sure he continues to socialize with other children his own age.

My four yr old daughter started her imaginary friends when she was three and I was pregnant with my son. She has several, but two main ones. When ever she is upset she will tell me Bob pulled her hair to make her cry or Larry is laughing at her. Hers are from Veggie Tales in case you are wondering about the names. I would tell her that if they couldn't behave they would have to leave. She would ask me to do it (I would) and everything would be fine for a while. She also liked to take them with us in the car and to the store. It finally got to the point that I told her they would have to stay home so they wouldn't get lost. It was such an ordeal putting them (sometimes 5 of them) in the car and all holding hands to go in the store. I just had to put my foot down. She seemed to understand. The "friends" were around more when my son was younger, but now that he is 18 months and the kids can play together more she doesn't talk about them as much. When she does, they are usually playing games together or she is telling them a story. Very rarely do they try to get in trouble anymore. I think she was feeling a little lonely and left out when my son was younger and took so much time. Now that we can do so much together she doesn't need them as much. Good luck.

Hi N.!
No worries! Let him use his imagination. My daughter is 3 1/2 now and has had multiple imaginary friends. I have welcomed them into our family as well as told my daughter that I am putting "Lily" in a time out if she keeps behaving that way. My daughter started this when I was at the end of my pregnancy with my other daughter. It's just her way of having someone to play with.
I have read A LOT about children having an imaginary friend and there is nothing to worry about.
Good Luck!
K. :~)

I remember my imaginary friend. My mom told me that I could play with her as long as she behaved and was a good girl. That if she wasn't good she would have to go away. One day she wanted to do something that I knew was naughty and I told her to go away and she did.

You could try that with your son, tell him he can have his friends as long as they are good, but if they are bad they have to go away.

He might also be missing his daycare friends. You could look into getting him into a play group, that may help.

I wish you luck.

Hello,

I have a 8 year old that had an Imaginary friend and his/her name was shadow. Shadow went every where with us for about 2 years. She was a only child at this time. I think that the reason that my daughter keep shadow around and took him every where is because that was the one thing we as parents did not have controll over. There were many times that she would yell at shadow or blame things on him/her. One week shadow was a girl and the next a boy. One week she would tell me she had put him away for the day because he was being mean to her. I never made a big deal about shadow. When we would go places i would ask her if shadow was with us or if he needed to be bucketl. I would tucj shadow in at night as well as her. Eventually shadow faded away and from talking to others this is normal. In my opinion if you punish him you should also punish his freinds. Put them all in time out in diffrent areas. It is normal and I think it will soon pass.