I'm Going Crazy! - Mount Airy,MD

I hope that you delivered already, but just in case. With my second child, my weight gain was (minus) 20 pounds. He was born 6 weeks early, thank goodness, he was 6 pounds. If he had waited two more weeks he would have been over 8 pounds! So don't worry about weight gain. As for peoples comments, just smile, say thank you and continue on, they are not worth the frustration, no matter who they are.

Actually you have it exactly the opposite. What she is telling you is it's going to be as easy as anything. You will prob. go into the hospital and not have time for anything the baby will prob. pretty much fall out when you get there. No pushing, no pain or anything.
I didn't and i didn't gain much weight in the end. The baby is spending more time getting into position than gaining weight.

As for the first half of your post, hang in there! The pain is probably a result of a "sunny-side up" baby. I had the same problem with my second and no warning from my OBGYN as it can often be difficult to determine the baby's position in the womb. Ultrasound doesn't help since they can shift around a lot. This just means the back of baby's head is pressing on your lower spinal column. Back labor sucks (I did 24 hours of it last time), but the reward, as always, is worth it. Keep your eyes on the prize and take heart, your ordeal is almost over! You'll do great I'm sure!

As for your question, don't pine too much for an estimate! I had a sono and estimate with both of my boys (the sono was really to check fluid levels since I was GD). With my first they estimated 7 1/2lbs., he was 8lb 12 1/2oz! With my second they estimated 6 1/2 to 7lb, he was 8lb 6oz! The estimate seems really no more than a sinecure for the expectant mother (and we can all admit that we were desperate for word of ANY progress at the end :) It's certainly not the final verdict. Don't count the chickens before they're hatched and don't weigh the baby before they're born. :) If people ask how big the baby is, just smile and tell them "Big enough, for sure!" or "we'll have to wait and see!"

I think the guesstimate on the weight/size of the baby is more for the Dr to estimate baby size vs how big your pelvis is to determine if a c-section might be needed. We all knew my son was going to be big (turned out to be 9 lbs 1.5 oz), but I have very wide hips and had no trouble with a vaginal delivery. The last month was very painful walking because my hip ligaments were so loose. Every step felt like the joints were grinding away. I think you need to get as much rest as possible between now and delivery. It's hard when your nesting urge wants you to do more and more. Does floating in a warm bath help with the pain at all (if your Dr says it's OK)? How about some counter pressure at the base of your spine? It won't go on forever, just a few more weeks and you'll have your kidneys to yourself again. Hang in there!

I had a sono at 34 weeks but it was due to the fact that I was measuring 40 weeks, was 50% effaced and 2-3 cm. The dr was checking to make sure that my due date hadn't been wrong...it wasn't...in fact, my son was measuring a week behind.

My dr gave me a "guesstimate" of the baby's weight not from doing a sono, but simply from feeling around on my belly. She told me he would be between 7 lb and 7 lbs 8 oz. He was born two days later weighing 7 lbs 12 oz.

I know how miserable it is, but hang in there, its almost over now!

ok
first off, kiss your little one and call and trusted friend to watch the tot for a few hours, or even a weekend, then indulge yourself, you wanna sit around and try to eat your weight in ice cream.. do it, the trick is to get the feel good chemicals in your brain to wake up and have a party !!
then sit down with your husband and go over any last minute
things that need to be handled before the birth, is the puppy going to the kennel while you are gone? has this been handled ? the pot hole in the yard ? is the car gassed up and ready to go in an emergency ?sit down and make a list and then carefully check things off as you go.
i have also been told that i am carrying low, and i am
somewhere in the forth month, and yeah i have noticed back
pain, insomnia and yes pain in my foot as well, how weird is that?? but the unlocalized pain has more to do with
nerve clusters and where they start off from in the spine then anything else. that and the fact that the fetus is
low and probably putting pressure on those nerves.
ANON. .. THE WOMAN WHOSE MOTHER IN LAW DEMANDS THAT THEIR CHILD CALLS THEM MOMMY...this is a sure sign that your
mother in law has mental problems..that and the fact that she is telling people that HER daughter is the childs actual mother, DO NOT under any circumstances let this woman watch your child, your sister in law doesnt sound like shes all there either. can you say RESTRAINING ORDER??
if your husband refuses to stand up to his mother than you have to. you are the childs mother, NOT HER!!
now if you really want to see your husband grow a spine,
move into the babies room for two or three weeks, and then ask him would he allow his mother to watch your child, if he says YES, then stay in the babies room, and ask him the same question again in two weeks, he will quickly find his spine and TELL HIS MOTHER NO!!
K. H.

Hi! I don't have time to read the responses you've already gotten, but regarding the "oh you don't look pregnant" comments, I wanted to tell you it could be worse!! I had the opposite problem - people thinking I was due any day when I was only 7-8 months along, asking "are you still here??" EVERY DAY at work, telling me I must be carrying twins or that there was no way I was going to be able to deliver such a big baby, etc. I didn't gain that much weight (30 pounds total), but I was HUGE in front. The comments were really annoying - at least your comments are somewhat flattering! Anyway, to your question, I don't think they do late sonos unless they suspect a problem. You could pay for a special 3D sono, but your insurance won't cover it. Sometimes your OB/midwife can estimate the size based on the distance between your pubic bone and the top of the fundus (sp?), but if the baby has already dropped then I think it's harder to tell. I think it's normal to stop gaining weight (or even lose a couple of pounds) in the last few weeks, so I wouldn't worry about that. Best wishes and congrats!

not every woman is the same and congrats you are finally there.

find your self some straight rasberry tea that will help start the contraction.

now as to the fact that you didnt gain much weight means that you just used up all the food that you ate, as long as you didnt starve yourself and as long as you didnt take things like diet pills, and you had a stable healthy diet all is good. consider your self luck. i had my baby 6 months ago and before i was preggers i was 165 and i was 219 at the end yes holy mackrel. that was a lot. she was my 2nd child. i am only now 170 and i am desperate to get it down.
but dont take this as a lecture, its not that is great you made it to the end. now you porbabley kept the weight off because of the puppy and 2.5 year old that you have.

not to mention any stress taht you have.

nuts and bolts of it. dont worry, enjoy the fact that you only have one child still and that it is a little less hetic at the mo. and get your over night bag ready.

good luck

and enjoy, ps
give the next person who says the wrong thing a good punch and then just blame it on the hormones. heh eh eh eh.

Hi C.!

Hang in there, girl. You're almost there! I only gained 21 pounds during my pregnancy, but ended up losing three the last few weeks of pregnancy. So I know what it's like for people to tell you that you don't look pregnant enough to deliver.

Also, my daughter was at station 0 at 36 weeks and she just kept dropping. During delivery I stalled at 4 cms but she kept moving out. So I understand all the pressure down there. It does get better. Once it's over, it's over.

Don't worry about not having enough energy right now. All your energy is taken up by growing this baby and getting ready for the hardest work of your life.

I didn't have a sonogram late in my pregnancy, but my midwife could estimate the weight and size of my baby just by measuring my belly and feeling it. She was dead on - even though my daughter was more than a week "late". My midwife started predicting at my 36 week appt. and then estimated by average growth for the last month. Of course, one indication is how much you weighed at birth. Don't worry about the baby's weight. Your body will sacrifice your health to make sure the baby has what it needs. My daughter arrived at 8 pounds and 2 oz. So, go figure! I weighed 8 pounds, 3 oz. when I was born and my mother only gained 15 pounds.

Just rest and concentrate on the wonderful new life inside you. You are doing an amazing thing.

I just have to say, estimate is the magic word. The docs can say your baby is this weight and they are usually totally off, or at least somewhat off. I have seen where people were told the baby was around 8lbs and it turned out to be 10. With my son my last ultrasound was at his 20 week mark and the only way they would do another one was if I paid for it or had complications. I would not stress it too much, just hang in there. I have seen people who put on maybe 18lbs max in their pregnancy but the baby was still 8lbs so just try to take it easy and breathe and focus on the fact that very soon your aches and pains will be replaced with a new sensation-no sleep :D Just kidding. Try to find ways to laugh!

Hello, C.! 1st off - Congratulations! Believe me when I say this discomfort will pass. I know from experience. My 1st baby, I had back labor pains for the last month and he was 10 days late (only about 3 according to my calculation). So, as soon as my water broke, I went in requesting my epidural. Of course, with check-in and paperwork and blah, blah, blah, it took longer than I wanted. But, as soon as it took effect, the rest was easy. When I finally felt like it was time, only the nurse was in the room, and we did two "practice" pushes. Then, the doctor came in, and he was barely in place for my last push.
Then, for my 2nd, she was breech, so I had her by C-section.
Now, I am 34 weeks, and I have people asking me if I'm having twins this baby is so big. At my last sono, they said she was about 5 something pounds, and others at this stage are about 3 pounds. And the sono tech was saying "Wow, this is a big baby". So, in a week I have another sono, and then after that they will do another sono every week. Yes, there are complications, I'll be 39 when the baby is born, and I'm considered in the obese category, but I've only classified myself as overweight. Anyway, I understand about the discomfort with this one as well, b/c my feet and ankles are so swollen, I only have one pair of shoes that I can wear, and they are sandals with buckles and they are on their last notch, and I have to wear these once most comfortable sandals with everything including my Sunday dresses. And, by the end of the day, even these shoes are too tight, and my ankles are so swollen, that basically I can't bend them walking up the stairs in our house, b/c there's too much skin and excess that there's no give. And, it hurts.
Anyway, sorry to go on so much when I was trying to be encouraging, and say that having kids are a great blessing, even though sometimes we might be blinded by other factors, but we just have to keep our eyes on the blessings ahead.
You are doing well, and later it won't matter that you didn't know in advance how much your baby weighs. What matters is that you enjoy your baby and the love and support from your toddler and husband.

1st of all, don't listen to people. I know, easier said than done, but apparently the sight of a pregnant woman makes people lose all sense of control over their mouths. I had twins and gained 65lbs!! So of course, I was huge, so I got the comments from the other end of the spectrum.

To answer your question, many docs provide mutliple sonograms while others don't. It's really that simple. AND, most of the estimates seem to be wrong anyway. I've only known one person whose baby was the size the doc estimated.

You only have a bit left so don't worry and just try to rest. I also know from experience that when a baby is sitting on the sciatic nerve (one of my boys sat there for the whole pregnancy!!). Unfortunately, it won't go away until after the baby is delivered. Unless he shifts dramatically. But to warn you (sorry) but I had the sciatic pains almost daily for a few months after the delivery and then still off and on (more off than on) for the next few years. I may just be an abnormality in this regard, but keep an eye out and the pain doesn't go away, go to a doc who specializes in that area (I just kept putting it off using the fact that I was busy with the kids as an excuse).

I'm sorry you're in pain, but if you're 9 months, it's only for a little bit longer. You are doing great. Not everyone "glows" during pregnancy and sometimes - no matter how much you want to be and have the kid - sometime pregnancy just sucks!!

Good luck honey,
Jules

I am sorry to read of your pain. It must be difficult to have low energy and be in pain and still try to manage with a toddler. My thoughts are with you.
I did have a size estimate for my daughter as toward the end of my pregnancy, I had three OBGYN appointments per week. I also had hospitalized bed rest for the last week of my pregnancy. However, I never got to experience being 9 or even 8 months pregnant. My daughter was born 6 years ago and at a weight of just 3 lbs 9 oz. She came just over 6 weeks early. I remember looking at the expectant mothers who got to listen to their baby's heart beats on a machine at the OBGYN's office and wondering if I would get to do that too. Now, I wonder why I wanted to do that. I did get to sit at that machine and to have a size estimate for my daughter, but there were special circumstances and I wish that I never had that great desire to hear her heartbeat on that machine or know her size. My personal attitude needed an adjustment. I am not saying that yours does, just mine did. I still have a guilt complex over that. The main thing is your baby is healthy and that you are also healthy. Have a great day.

You are doing a great job and no one expects you to be able to do 100% everything for your hubby and child when you are about to bring another life into this world. Sure you may not have gained a ton of weight, but it is less to lose later and you were being pregnant AND keeping up with an active toddler!

Some OB's like to do sonograms at the end. Mine didn't but my friend's OB did. The problem with the sonograms or ultrasounds is that they are not very good at predicting size at the end stage. My friend's said her baby was 8lbs 15 oz over a week before she delivered and then the OB told her it was more of a 7.5 to 8lb baby. The doctor figured that out just by feeling the baby. The baby was just born at 8 lbs 5 oz. Anyway ultrasounds can be off by over a pound. If your OB is good she can give you an estimate if she wants. But even they can be wrong in their guess.

Soon when you have had the baby, and had a chance to recover you are going to forget what you are going through now and just be enjoying your larger family. Good luck and hang in there. You are almost done!

Hey Christy,
It's D., I know I said this weekend that you looked small...but that was meant to be a compliment. I think you look great!!!!!!
Don't worry about not gaining weight. As long as you are still measuring on target with your fundal height all is good.
you can always ask for a sono at the end but know they aren't always accurate. they can be off by 2lbs in either direction.

One last thing, don't worry it's almost over. I know how you feel right now. Your doing a great job!

You're in the home stretch, Mom! Week 38? Wow! Congratulations! Remember that you are beautiful! As for the baby size, I'm sure you know that every pregnancy is different. Best guess? When I asked other moms, they said second baby is sometimes a little heavier than the first. My first was 7 lbs., 15 1/2 oz. Second, 8 lbs., 4 oz. Not all follow that pattern, so, I wouldn't worry about the guesstimate. You can't prepare any better for knowing. As for the pain, you know that's just part of the process, unfortunately. I'd ask the dr. what is safe to do at this time to ease the discomfort. I remember not being comfortable, not being able to lay down, stand or sit and being very restless and irritable as a result. Take comfort in knowing it's almost over, though, and if it's too unbearable, talk with your dr. to make sure everything is ok. I walked the neighborhood to ease some of the discomfort. Try to rest when your toddler rests instead of trying to get some work done. Make the dog rest, too. It's time to slow down a bit and be in the moment.

I'm sorry to hear you are having such a hard time! I wish I could help you w/all that, but I don't know if there is anything that will help you except to wait. (NOT what you want to hear, I know)...I didn't have an ultrasound towards the end of my pregnancies, but the OB just felt the baby from the outside to "predict" the size the baby was going to be. If your OB doesn't seem concerned that you haven't been gaining wait, then you shouldn't be. Call them if you have questions, trust me, they hear much more ridiculous things than "I'm not gaining weight, is something wrong?"! Pregnant ladies do tend to worry a lot and I have a friend that works at an OB office...she told me when I was pregnant to just call, it can't be as crazy as some of the other ladies that call! That is what they are there for anyway! After all, you'll be paying them quite a bit of money! haha!

!9 pounds? I'll go you one better. My second. I LOST 35 pounds before I started gaining. Only gained 18 pounds. She weighed in at, get this, 9 pounds, 14 ounces! I was working part time at a children's clothing store. There were 3 other women who worked there that were pregnant. I was the only one who came out of the hospital weighing less than when I first got pregnant. They hated me. LOL. You are ok. Every pregnancy is different. And the second labor is so much easier than the first. It hurt, but I was laughing a lot, too.

Congratulations!! Hang in there - pregnancy is a long road! I am just now 20 weeks myself....I just had my second ultrasound and that was my last one - my insurance only covers two and that is all that is necessary unless there is a medical problem. I think that is standard. It will be a long wait to see baby! Especially considering my mom was 2 weeks late with both my brother and me, so I think I may be late too....but don't worry - it won't last forever...and try to take it as a compliment when non-pregnant people say you don't look pregnant - they mean that you look great!! :)

I had a sono at 39 weeks because they were concerned about my son never "dropping" they told me he would be 8lbs 6 oz but he was only 7lbs 10oz. Even if you got a sono now it may not be accurate.
The pain could be a lot of things. Probably the baby putting pressure on your nerve. I took Hypnotherapy classes for my preganancy and the techniques for relaxation worked wonders for me when I was uncomfortable.I liked it so much I am now a hypnotherapist.
The best thing I can tell you is to try to be easy on yourself. Make yourself as comfortable as possible and let your body do what it needs to do. I know you want to be the best wife and mother you can but you have to remember that you have needs too and, right now, you need to take it easy.

Some of the relaxation techniques included visualization. Use your imagaination and imagine the pain as a color and then make the color lighter and lighter until it is a beautiful white light. Or you can imagine that with each breath that you breathe you are breathing out the pain and discomfort. Another technique is that you imagine your hand feels like when you get novacaine at the dentist and it is numb. And any area that you place your hand, that area also becomes numb as well.

The re-wording of your symptoms to words that are not as negative can help as well. For example a contraction can be called pressure or a "wave" so that in your mind you aren't thinking about pain so much as a pressure.

I could go on and on but the main thing is to try your best to concentrate on the end result and how easy it will be and your body will follow. Make yourself as comfortable as possible and don't try to do too much. YOur body needs to save it's energy for the big day.

The pain WILL subside. Birth doesn't have to be painful.(I know a lot of moms will disagree with me but it really doesn't).Do some little moves with your hips while on your hands and knees and see if that takes the pressure off your the nerve.

I hope this helps and congratulations on the pregnancy.

I had an ultrasound towards the very end of my pregnancy with my youngest due to my older daughter being so big. My older daughter (now 4) was so big she got stuck and they had to use the vacume to help get her out. They almost had to do a crash c-section to get her out. Because of that, my younger daughter's size was watched very close. They even decided to induce me a week before my due date beacause of my fears of her being too big to push out. she was 8 pounds 10 ounces. Her big sister was 9 pounds 7 ounces. The labor was much easier! has your OB mentioned concern about the size of the baby or your measurements? Oh and about the estimates, the docs estimated my oldest daughter to be at 8 pounds the day before I had her. Those estimates mean nothing to me. LOL

i totally understand why you are venting. Chin up, it's almost over! You are doing great in my opinion. A warm bath always helped with my back pains. Prop your feet up and ask the hubby to rub the feet for ya.

i think my first child was "down there" for a few weeks before delivery because i had to sit a weird way because i could feel something down there. i had her in 1.5 hours after contractions started. being uncomfortable now may be a trade off to fast delivery later. i think it was for me. when you have a sono they tell you what they mesaure the baby at then every week you an assume the baby will grow so many ounces and at this time ai cant remember what the rate is but it thenn changes at i think 38 weeks to a pound a week. check into the rates and you can have a rough estimate.

first of all CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!! You can do it girl you're almost there!
You sound like me during my last few weeks. Miles was SOOO LOW and I was effaced 50% like you. It felt like I was in pre-labor for like a month. It's definitely extremely uncomfortable but you're sooo close! Just hang in there, mama!

I think 19 pounds is a healthy weight gain! Unless your doctor has said something, which I doubt, I think that's perfect. At least you're not going to be a manatee afterward. :)

Don't let people's stupid comments get to you- everybody's an 'expert'. I wasted so much energy on aggravation from co-workers saying 'you're too small, you're going to have a small baby' awful things. I was 100% perfectly healthy and had a great pregnancy, perfect baby. I still get mad to this day about what one person in particular said about my size. Pregnancies come in all shapes and sizes, same as PEOPLE, and that's normal! I even asked the doctor, who told me his sister looked about 5 months pregnant the day she delivered- 'you could barely tell, and she was totally normal and healthy'.
I think it's a time in your life where you can get away with telling people they're idiots, or to just shut up. 'She's pregnant, so it's okay!'

To answer your question, I had a 'high risk' pregnancy due to a genetic blood-clotting disorder, which really amounted to nothing more than me taking baby aspirin once a day and getting to get extra ultrasound pictures... I even got a '4-D' one. So I had it lucky, figuring that I was totally healthy except for something they were keeping an eye on, but I got to see tons of ultrasounds. The more they want to see you, the more worried they are- so your pregnancy must be perfect!

GOOD LUCK MAMA!
Sending lots of love your way,
A.

You're doing great and you are almost there. It's hard because at this point you are so uncomfortable that you just want the end to be near. Don't listen to others. With my 2, everyone told me I looked like I was having twins (I was not, and I was not thrilled to hear that). A friend barely showed and she had a perfectly normal sized baby. As for sonos, I didn't have them, but my sis did and they told her that she was going to have a 10 lb baby which freaked her out. The baby ended up being a normal 7 lbs. As long as your doc isn't worried you shouldn't worry.