Ideas on Teaching Kids to Be Charitable

Updated on June 28, 2010
J.P. asks from Murrysville, PA
19 answers

I have been trying to think of ways to teach my kids about giving. They are only 4 and 2 years old, and this is where I am unsure. There are always causes to donate to, but I am looking for something that will make an impression on little ones (and that they can be a part of). An idea I have been thinking of is putting a 'help jar' in the kitchen that we can all contribute to. Maybe we can buy dog or cat food and donate it to an animal shelter? This way they can see the animals and know that the money we save and the food we buy can help. Does anyone have any other ideas useful for preschoolers?

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Thank you for the responses! We always recycle as well as donate old toys and clothes regularly. I personally volunteer my time and talents (former childrens entertainer, skilled balloon artist, puppeteer, and face painter) at community events for children in need. I first got the money jar idea from Maria Schrivers interview with Oprah, and someone else mentioned that as well! I added taking the kids with me for the shopping and delivery of items so that they could be a part of the entire process. From setting money aside to seeing the animals recieving the product we deliver (without frightening them, which, another mom pointed out as a possibility with shelters and nursing homes at this age). Many of the suggestions are great for older children and adults, and I am aware of them as well. I'm still looking for practical specific lessons for a 2 and 4 year old. Aside from the obvious live kindly and practice what you preach approach. We do. I've got some gems here, and welcome more ideas!

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S.M.

answers from St. Louis on

Kids of all ages do as they see--so if you do then they will follow...this includes kindness, charity, sympathy, empathy and everything else...

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M.S.

answers from Philadelphia on

Maybe at Christmas time they can each pick out a toy for Toys for Tots... or even just going through their old stuff and picking out things for the Salvation army... (although they may not make the connection if they're just dropping stuff off...)

The animal shelter is a great idea!

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D.D.

answers from New York on

Little ones need to do something that's hands on so saving money and buying animal food that they get to drop off at the shelter is a great idea. Or having them pick out a can or two of food to put in a box and then driving to a food pantry once the box is filled is another idea. It gives them a chance to be involved in the whole process and they get to see the actual location where their donated items go at the end.

What a great mommy to teach your children that the world doesn't revolve around them; that there are others out there would could use some help.

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C.G.

answers from Philadelphia on

How about making little thank you bags for people who do jobs that are normally thankless? I did this with my middle school youth group one year, but you could do it with preschoolers as well. We got Ziploc bags and put a few pieces of candy in each one with a note that told them thank you for all you do. Then we went to find people who had jobs we would not want to do. We found garbage truck workers, hospital janitors and cafeteria workers, housekeeping staff, etc., and gave them a little goody bag and told them thank you. It made both the recipients and the kids feel good. We also took bags to our fire and police departments. We have also baked cookies for police and fire departments and delivered them.

I would steer clear of places that can be scary, like homeless shelters, domestic violence shelters, children's hospitals, and nursing homes, until they are in elementary school. You don't want to traumatize them and have them associate giving with a scary experience. However, when they are that age, baking cookies to take to a shelter, making cards to deliver to nursing home residents, making cards to deliver to kids in a children's hospital, etc., would be great ways to continue this process.

You can make cards or draw pictures for our military members serving overseas. Websites like www.operationlovefromhome.org are always looking for people to send/make cards.

I think having a help jar at home is a great idea, since giving includes our time, talents, AND money. If you do buy food for an animal shelter, contact the shelter ahead of time and see if they will allow you and the kids to walk a few of their dogs (if the kids aren't afraid of dogs). Many shelter animals don't get walked/handled as much as they need, and often times shelters will welcome your time with their animals. In a lot of shelters, young people have to be 16 to volunteer (liability issues), but they will allow you to accompany your children to help out with certain tasks. Someone mentioned volunteering with an animal rescue group at PETCO. PetSmart also sponsors groups, and they always need people to clean cat cages, and do other things for the animals. The animal rescue group I volunteer with constantly does fundraisers, and maybe you and the kids can seek out a group to see what you could help out with. Maybe you can make crafts, man a table at a fundraising event, or find some other way to help animals get adopted or raise funds.

There are a lot of great ideas from the moms on here already, but if you need more, be sure to do a search online for charitable ideas for preschoolers or something similar. There are a number of books on the topic on Amazon.com as well. It's great that you are thinking about this! You are definitely on the right track, and your whole family will benefit greatly from your efforts. Good luck!

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Start at home... how to help at home etc.
My 3 year old son, will even pick up things at home, to "recycle" and put it in the recycle bin, for example. He likes doing that. We tell him it helps the environment/Earth and helps stop litter etc.

We rake leaves in the yard, and use it as mulch or compost it. They understand.... it helps the "Earth."

We feed the wild birds & have a water dish out, and explain that it 'helps' the birds for food or provides water for them, when the weather is dry... not raining or there is no food for them in the wild.

We plant a garden.. .and explain that it helps the bees to gather pollen and keeps them healthy and so they don't die out.

We teach them how everything helps others... in a cycle... their old toys helps other children that don't have any or any money or have to live in shelters etc.

so many examples and things you can do, even in the home.
That is where it starts.
"Abstract" ideas about 'giving' for young children.. may not be tangible enough yet, for them.

It is not just about giving 'money'... but even things or food or your own hands and legs... to help others.

Even when we are out... I ALWAYS make it a point to "help" the elderly or handicapped... opening the door for them... or reaching for something in a store that is too high... or reading something on a label they can't see, letting an elder go first in line if they only have a few items etc. Kids learn from that.... empathy, helping, courtesy, thoughtfulness, respect for elders or handicapped etc.

All these ideas... are about "giving." It is not just money giving.

But yes, we have always, since 2 years old, taught our kids about "money" and about budgeting and how it can help others.... even when we buy our own things... .

The general gist of "giving"... is about "helping"... in any way. Thereby being "charitable."

all the best,
Susan

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M.N.

answers from Philadelphia on

One small thing we have begun with our 4 yo is helping out just because. Our neighbor lives by herself and we take in her trash cans. He asked me what he would get (sticker, money) to do it and we talked about how we don't just do things because we get something in return. He also helps me sort through his toys a few times a year and gives away ones other kids may want to play with.

Also when I was little my parents would buy a few loaves of bread and several things of meat and cheese and we would do an assembly line to make sandwiches for a homeless shelter. We didn't usually go with our parents at that age, but it really stuck with me even at 4 or 5 that I could be part of helping others.

Good luck!

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T.K.

answers from Dallas on

I saw an interview with Maria Shriver once. You know they are ridiculously wealthy. They write huge checks and have philanthropy in thier blood. But what does tha mean to a little kid? She said her mother Eunice made the lesson real to her kids by having cereal one night a week for dinner. She would put a jar on the table and they would put the money in that they would've spent on dinner that night. The family all got a vote on what charity they were saving for. I thought that was an amazing idea. For my little ones, I volunteered us for community events. Clothing drives and Angel Tree. Stuff like that.

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C.P.

answers from Phoenix on

maybe at a certain time of the year have your kids start picking out old toys to donate. do it every year, they'll get into it. i had a friend do this. her kids are very giving

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K.L.

answers from Erie on

We have younger family members, so we hand down our toys instead of donating them. The one idea that seemed to work pretty well for us was... when our twins turned four a couple of months ago, we invited all of their playgroup and preschool friends. Because it was a big shin-dig, we asked everyone to bring canned/dry goods instead of birthday gifts. Then we packed it all up and took it to the local food pantry (where they gave us a brief tour and explainedd what they do). The boys enjoyed the whole experience, never missed the gifts they didn't get, and still talk about the food pantry. It wasn't ideal, because they saw all the food but not the people who benefit from it, but I feel like that might have been overkill for their age (and potentially rude to the recipients, since you never know what a child might say or ask). They also received a certificate from the food pantry listing the amount (in pounds) of food that they donated, which will be more meaningful to them as they grow older... I also volunteer to mentor a woman who is trying to bounce back from financial hardship. The agency has regularly paired me with moms with young children, but that is a little trickier to explain how we're helping. Their pre-school keeps charity in the forefront, so make sure you explore (and reinforce) those opportunities. Other than that, I suggest you keep doing what you're doing - they will certainly learn from your example...

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E.M.

answers from Johnstown on

Do you have a woman's shelter in your area? We have one just down the street here and they are always looking for toys and clothing for the children and women. Perhaps you could talk to the shelter worker and explain to her that you have several toys at home not being played with that you'd like to go to a good cause. If the worker oks it, take your kids down to see that there are kids who don't have toys now and would really like to have something to play with and that your children's toys would be perfect. Good luck!

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A.K.

answers from York on

One thing I did with my kids was have a joint birthday party when they were 3 and 6. The guests were asked not to bring presents, but to donate an item or time to a charity or needy person of their choice. If they did in fact bring a gift, the plan was to donate it ourselves. We invited both of their school classes, plus some outside friends and family. Neither one of them had a problem with not getting presents, because someone else was being helped instead. We had a good turnout, and hopefully helped a lot of people we will never meet in the process. They had a great time at the party just spending time with their friends. No presents needed.

The other thing we do is donate all of their toys when they outgrow them. They are usually in great shape. My daughter is 9 now and knows that she could be making a lot of money (in her eyes) selling them at yard sales, so it has become a little harder for her to just give them away. She does it without argument, though. She knows that some kids would have nothing if she didn't give toys to them.

J.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

I haven't read the other posts so I am sorry if this is a repeat. My baby isn't old enough to do this but my old room mates used to do this. Every year before christmas they would go through all her toys and clothes and give half (sometimes more sometimes less) to goodwill. The little girl (she's my baby cakes) will say "I am giving my toys to needy kids that don't have any." They also do this mid year. Sometimes kids get attached to things and simply keep them around just for visual reassurance, but they dont play with them anymore, and if you give them to good will other kids can get some much needed use (not to mention joy) out of them. Also I worked for a local college and we had "make a wish" tree's at christmas. We would buy gifts for our students in need to give to their children (not like playstations or anything, mostly like books, football, movie tickets, a CD, etc). That's always a good idea, let your kids shop for others in need! Usually we speant 5-10 dollars (sometimes a lil more) on each child, and we could pick as many as we wanted. I think its great you want to start your kids off this way, more people need to do it!

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E.A.

answers from Pittsburgh on

What about going down to the Humane Society and helping care for the cats/kittens? I think helping to walk to dogs would be a little to hard for kids so young - but maybe helping to water/feed/clean the cat & kittens would be fun - you could also use the money from your money jar to buy cat treats and food - and this way your little ones may even be able to give the cats & kittens some of the treats that they were able to buy themselves with the money from the money jar...?
Good luck!

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L.P.

answers from Philadelphia on

My son and I volunteer at our local PETCO pet store through a local animal shelter that keeps foster cats there who are awaiting adoption. We go in once every 2 weeks and clean out the cages, scoop the litter, and replace the food. They have volunteers that come in 2x a day every day and they are always looking for more help. I think it's a great hands-on way to teach my son about being charitable with his time.

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R.C.

answers from Pittsburgh on

volunteer at a local food bank (or soup kitchen) is the best way to start. A local distribution, that "clients come through with a box and everyone hands them a food item. This will also reinforce "Thank you" cause who couldnt' tell a little one thank you?
My daughter, now 17 just graduated from high school and logged over 570 service hours during the past 12 months. her organizations are:
1. Fayette County Community Action Agency: sort, box, set-up, register and distribute food
2. Point MArion Food Pantry: - registering clients, unloading and sorting, distributing and inventoring product.
3. The Salvation Army - Local Service Center: Everything from sorting donated items, stocking shelves, buying toys for the treasures for children program, sorting toys for kids, answering phones, sweping the floor and taking out garbage.
4. Masontown United Methodsit Church: Bible Club, Vacation Bible School, Making Apple Dumplings (this was fun - as she doesn't have a cooking gene in her system - her sister is a chef), puppet ministry
5. Point Marion United Methodist Church: Prior deliver of Meals on wheels, thrift shop, fundraing dinners, etc.
6. National Pike Wagon Train - historical covered wagon trek everything from helping with horses, serving food and registration
7. Freindship Hill National Historical Site - this was where it all began - Candle diping from the time she could walk and talk. She was a demonstrator of how to dip correctly, plus took breaks filling in for otehr booths as needed.

Volunteering is fun. I'm sorry but puttin money in a jar has no meaning. We fel you aren;t teaching anything. Hands on is the way to go. Instead of just putting money in to buy that bag of pet food, take them to the store, have them help pick it out, gather up a few old towels and take them with you to deliver to the animal shelter. they need to "see" how it works to understand it.
Ring the bell for an hour for the Salvation Army. There is one in your area. collect food from your own cabinet and give to the local food pantry to someone in need. do this at your church on a sunday morning and let all the kids do the collecting. At one of the churches we attend, there is a "penny fund" and the children go through the pews to collect change (sometimes dollars) from the congregration to use for a special mission.
Scouting is very important and will help that volunteer teaching. It can get them into that mind set. conscentrate on the older one, because the youngest will follow always.
Please, just teach them that it is not a hand out. It is a hand up helping them through a difficult time i their lives. If they make one person smile, it is worth it.
Make cards for Meals on wheels, a local nursing home or veterans hospital. Don't do this just on holidays, remember our seniors year round.
Jessica has been known to make craft kids and deliver them to residents.
When you walk by that kettle in the month of december, let your kids drop in their change. If you are in this area - we'll even let them give a few rings on the bell!

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L.T.

answers from Pittsburgh on

You've received a lot of good responses. Here are a few others to consider.

The VBS at my church just held a bandage drive - fun character bandages - for oncology patients at Children's Hospital. The kids could relate to being sick, get shots, having blood drawn so they seemed to connect with the idea of giving fun bandages to other sick children to make them smile. You could do this for local ped offices and clinics. Just contact first to see if they accept donations.

My kids and I take our recycling (paper only) to the recycling bin at their preschool. It is one that they use as a fundraiser. So while we are doing something good for the environment we are also helping the school's fundraising efforts.

With our youth group we made jars of soup mix to take to people at a local nursing home. We didn't actually deliver the jars ourselves, but you could.

P.W.

answers from Dallas on

your ideas are great! Just model being a kind and charitable person and I think that will go a long way. Is there a program in your community at christmas where you can sort of "adopt" someone to provide a gift? A family shopping trip for that purpose is great.

Jewish Family Service (and you don't have to be Jewish) in Dallas has a program where children draw cards for holidays that are delivered to the elderly, etc...

See if you can do a one time deal with Meals on Wheels and have the whole family deliver.

When my kids began allowance they were required to put 10% in a jar for charity. After it added up we donated to the charity of their choice.

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S.C.

answers from Allentown on

We put our change in a jar through out the year. at christmas, the kids count it up (we got one of those change counters so even young ones could help) & we usually match that amount. then we shop at the Heifer Market (on line or threw our church) and "buy animals" for the kids to give to their grandparents, aunts & uncles, & teachers. lastly, we "write a story" using the animals as the characters & give the "book" as the kids gift with a card saying what animals has been bought for them (available online from Heifer website). The kids illustrate (or you could use stamps, stickers, etc).

My kids are older but I think even young kids would get that they bought grandma a duck. As they get older than you explain how the Heifer market works.

Last year our church offered other items like soccer balls for kids in Burma that we bought & added to our story.

Whatever you decide, have fun & good luck!

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J.R.

answers from Miami on

Dear J., Some ideas of how we try to build in kindness and charity into our daily lives:
1. Give change at a store or restaurant into a charity box by the till.
2. Give money to beggars that look like they really need it.
3. COnverse with elderly people in wheelchairs at the park etc.
4. Share food snacks at the park with other kids
5. Give away together old toys and clothes
6. recycle old bottles
7. give money to sidewalk musicians
8. talk about what money mommy and daddy donate to charity throughout the year...

HTH

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