Ideas for a 4 Year Old's Birthday Party

Updated on September 13, 2010
H.P. asks from South Hadley, MA
8 answers

Hi, I know, lame question, but I'm kinda stumped on what to do for my daughter when she turns 4 this month. Up until now we've had neighbors, friends, and family over for a party and made lots of food and it was really about the adults. Now that she's 4 I'd love to host a party of her friends but that's the problem: she doesn't really have any! She just started preschool at a new school and they don't really play together much. I was thinking I'd just invite her class over and see who comes and just have a small, traditional party for boys/girls at our house. Is that was people usually do for this in-between stage? Would welcome comments and suggestions!

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S.S.

answers from Boston on

We just invited my daughter's Kindergarten class to her birthday instead of having a party with adult family and friends. There are many new children in her class so it will be a great opportunity for the children to get to know each other. We've had plenty of parties at home so this year we've decided to have it somewhere else with organized activities, pizza and cake.

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L.B.

answers from Boston on

I just took my daughter to a 4-year old's birthday party and they rented a bouncy obstacle course - much different from a bouncy house, and much safer (less kids bonking heads). It was a HUGE success - the kids spent almost the entire party in the course - with parents gathered at each end to turn kids around and send them back in. I also heard that the parents had their own "adult party" the night before involving "adult drinks" and acting like kids themselves. Sounds like they got their money's worth!!

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W.H.

answers from Stockton on

For our sons 4th birthday party, we had friends and family. A few of our friends have children between the ages of 2 and 6 so it was perfect! His theme was Monster Jam and he had a monster truck jump house which was well worth the money! He had a total of 12 kids (and more adults) and it was perfect!
Make the theme whatever her favorite thing is right now. We did the same type of party for our daughter's 3rd birthday with a Dora jumper and our little pool! Super-fun!
Best of luck!!!

D.B.

answers from Boston on

Keeping a small number of kids is really important, especially if they don't interact much at preschool. Kids this age don't really "get" sitting around watching someone else open presents that they can't play with. And 4 year olds don't really "get" playing with others and not getting absorbed into their new toys 100%. So scale down your expectations. "See who comes" isn't a bad idea, depending on the number of kids you are looking at in total. We always followed the "age" rule - when our son was 5, he got to invite 5 kids. When he was 7, 7 invites.

Having a few kids that she knows well is more important than the class. Also, does the preschool have an in-class party with the parents bringing cupcakes or anything like that? That might be enough for her with these new friends. Invite a very small number of friends from her neighborhood/family circle if there are any - cousins, whatever.

Keep it simple with a few little games or a craft. Resist the pressure from others to do a big expensive extravaganza - it really gets out of hand, overstimulates the kids, and becomes a budget buster. At that point, it's not really about the kids.

Good luck!

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L.M.

answers from Springfield on

I know exactly what you mean by 'doesn't really have any', my four-year old son is the same. We were just invited to a party of a little boy he hadn't met yet but who will be in his pre-school class this coming year. It acknowledged the situation and basically said they were looking forward to making new friends. We're going! It's at a local park, which might be more comfortable for some than going to the house of a virtual stranger, but we'd still have gladly gone. Go for the class idea - it's her new peer group after all. Happy Birthday to her!
-L.

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E.C.

answers from San Francisco on

when my now-8YO twins were in preschool, many of their classmates had backyard parties. Another idea is- if there's a local playground, make it a "playdate with cake" where families meet up at the park and play around - maybe have some sand toys and bubbles handy - then sing happy birthday and have cake/cupcakes.

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C.G.

answers from Chicago on

I did that. I invited the friends we already with little girls her age, any neighbors I could think of that she would eventually go to grade school with (never hurts to try to score some future playdates!), and I invited the girls from her class because I was doing a very girly theme.
Great kid games are always the pinata, pin the tail on something, and then a craft of some sort. I've done cookie/cupcake decorating and birdhouse painting. Fake tatoos are an easy alternative to face painting. Ice cream sundae stations are always a hit.
Have fun!

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D.M.

answers from Denver on

I think the friend party is a great idea. I'd have a theme - simple one. Maybe have a game or craft planned so there is some focus. Then have some good old fashioned fun!

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