I Want to Loose Weight the Right Way...... =(

Updated on December 07, 2010
M.T. asks from Allen, TX
18 answers

Hi mommies,I am struggling so bad right now. I have reached an all time low. ROCK BOTTOM. I hate myself right now.I want to loose the weight. I am 5'3 191 LBS. I don't carry it in my belly but carry it in my arms, legs and booty.I am so tired of being moody and fat and misserable all the time. I started working out with a personal trainer and Im on a calorie limit and I still havent lost any weight. I don't wanna do fad diets or HCG diets or anything like that. I want to loose it the right way.I struggle with knowing what to cook, What to eat and what times to eat... So i am always un prepared. bought one clean eating book but the recepies were not appealing. I just really need some guidance..... Do you have cook books you like? Workout dvds you like? Food tips? health tips?

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answers from Dallas on

I just recently reached my goal weight, losing 45 lbs with the help of Weight Watchers. I definitely highly recommend their program and the meetings too. For me, it is always helpful to listen to others who are going through the same struggles. Also, there is a nutritional supplement a friend of mine used and has lost 35 lbs so far. Let me know if you'd like some info on that. I think one of the keys to success with that program is healing the body of what might be preventing weight loss first... Good luck to you... I know how hard it is.
Remember that you are beautiful regardless of the weight. You can do this!

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answers from New York on

I second the suggestion about Weight Watchers. They just launched a new program last week. I have found over the years that it is the most sensible approach to weight loss and it really does work. You can do it online, but I find that going to the meetings once a week really helps keep me motivated and gives me a support system, too. If there is one near you, you might want to give it a try.

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answers from San Francisco on

Check out Sparkpeople.com it is a free online community to help people loose weight and live a healthy active lifestyle.. oh did I say it was free! The program gives you meal plans- which for me was great when I was just starting out and needed help with the planning- there is also a huge online community to support you and help keep you motivated!

5 moms found this helpful


answers from Charleston on

You are not alone in the "hate myself" category. Although, I haven't hit bottom, yet. Hopefully, it won't be long. I used to be very healthy and fit so I do have experience. I am just not currently practicing what I am about to preach...lol. I had great success with eating 5-6 meals a day. Fuel your metabolism! Learn how much protein and COMPLEX carbs that you need to eat per day so you have an idea what you will need to consume. Dr. Oz is a great source for info on that subject. 1st... eat breakfast within 20 minutes of waking!!! Drink tons of water! Just go ahead a throw out sodas or sweet tea. If you are a coffee drinker switch to green tea. That will help you drop pounds in a matter of 6-10 weeks. If you use sugar try Truvia. I love it. If you eat cereals find ones that have lower sodium than calories (this will work with anything that you buy in box or bag). Sodium being higher than calories just feeds that salty/sugary craving monster. Veggies are limitless!!! Eat all that you want provided they are not sauteed in butter or deep fried. My favorite way to cook a-lot of vegetables is to toss veg (say green bean or carrot) into boiling water for 3-6 minutes depending on the veg. (GB 3 min- Carrot 6 min) Then drain and toss with Tbs. olive oil, 1/2-1 clove minced garlic (I use already minced for me), sprinkle of sea salt and black pepper for about another 3-6 minutes. Doesn't take long and works with so many veggies. You can par boil, drain, and dip into ice bath then store for future meals. Brown rice cooked in vegetable broth, or chicken broth is a great way to flavor whole grains. Roasting veggies is also easy and taste great. Chop any veg you want, toss with olive oil, Sea Salt, Pepper, and garlic. Place in 375 for about 45 minutes to an hour. Asparagus is also so good roasted. Toss is the OO, SS&P, Garlic and roast at 450 degrees for about 8 minutes. As far as meats go.... try to limit the red meat to once a week and 4-6 ounce portions. I ate a ton of fish and shrimp. But chicken and turkey breast are good. I like center cut pork chops also. But only once a week. Tons of beans! Lots of nuts (unsalted!), raw almonds being the best. Walnuts are great on salads. Try having spinach, mixed greens or arugula salads. Add unsalted sunflower seeds, grapes, raisins, walnuts, feta, goat, or gorgonzola cheeses, in small amounts of course. Tons of flavor to your salad topped with chicken breast. Speaking of that... marinate chicken in ziploc with low-fat house italian dressing for about 30 minutes, place in medium hot pan to lightly brown on both sides then place in oven for 15-20 minutes (depending on thickness of breast). Perfect chicken every time. Instead of me going on and on... you can message me if you would like more info. I have tons that I can share with you. :)

4 moms found this helpful


answers from Rocky Mount on

I was once the exact person that you described as yourself until I got fed up and totally sick of the way I looked and I had to make a change. Ten years later, I am 119 pounds and 5'4" tall....in other words, I look slammin'! How did I do it? Get rid of sugar and try to eliminate all bad carbs and processed foods. I know it sounds really miserable but if I can do this and go from 190 to 119 pounds, anyone can. I'm not a fan of exercise, either. I'm not lazy but you won't find me doing P90-X or some over-the-top stuff like that. I basically started out on full blown Atkins and with that, I lost 60 pounds in 9 months. The rest of the weight came off gradually and by the one year mark, I was down to a size 4 and 119. I have not gained any of this weight back. I walk, swim, and garden. I am a moderately active person but not a gym rat or a marathon runner. You really need to look into the low-carb lifestyle and how it can help you with your weight and also many other things that promote good health. I have great cholesterol, blood pressure is 117/72, excellent blood tests, and my glucose levels are steady and non-diabetic. Low-carb diets fend off diabetes, heart disease, and many other illnesses that are weight related. I'm a huge fan of this methodology because it WORKS when nothing else did. The weight will finally come off nicely and steadily...about 2 pounds per week and sometimes a little more if you are more active. Try the New Atkins Diet or South Beach Diet. Read the books and visit their websites. You can still eat like a King and lose weight. I wish you all the best and lots of success. Find what's right for you and stick to it. You can do this!

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answers from New York on

You're off to a great start if your working with a personal trainer. I lost 35 lbs recently. My focus hasn't been on weight, but on changing to a healthier lifestyle.

In addition to additional activity/excercise, here are ome things that helped...
I stopped drinking diet soda
I drink a lot more water
I stopped eating sweets
reduced packaged foods
eat more salads
eat more fruits and veggies

Since I'm boarderline diabetic, I try to follow the diabetic diet. A good trick is to eat 6 times a day. It keeps your blood sugar and level and keeps you from overeating. Eat a small breakfast, never skip breakfast. Even if it's just a yogurt or some fruit. Eat a morning snack. Eat a good lunch. Eat an afternoon snack, and a small dinner. You may choose to eat an evening snack.

Get in the habit of reading labels on packaged foods. You'll be surprised at how many calories are in some foods.

Try to eat whole grain foods and foods high in fiber. These will help to make you feel full.

Balance your carbs. Don't eat a sandwich for lunch with potatoe salad as a side; too many carbs at once, potatoes are a carb. Don't eat a large bowl of pasta with garlic bread. Instead have a large salad, some pasta and maybe a meatball or two.

Try to keep healthy snacks in the house. Whatever you like. The idea is so that when you have the munchies you can have something quick, rather than reaching for the junk food. Some ideas..
veggies and dip (make sure the veggies are all cut up)
low fat crackers w/humus or low fat peanut butter

Stick with it!

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answers from Spokane on

I've done Atkins....and it works, but as SOON as you eat 'normally' again, the weight piles back on, and then some!

The only thing that will work, and keep working, is a total lifestyle change:

EXCERSISE!! And not just weights. If you wanna burn off fat, then you *have* to do cardio: walking, running, swimming, biking, whatever. But get your heartrate up for a few hours a week (to start). I was doing an hour a day on the treadmill; I'd walk briskly for 7-8 minutes, then sprint for 2-3 and I loved it!

EAT!! Your body needs enough fuel to function or it goes into starvation mode and you lose nothing. A good rule is 10 calories per pound you want to weigh - but don't use your final goal weight right off the bat; work up to it. So if you want to weigh 130, then you need 1300 calories just to exsist, BUT I'd start with aiming for 1600 cals per day (plus, you'll be working out). You should also eat small meals 4 times per day instead of 3 big ones, about every 3 hours.

Eat real food: LOTS of veggies, fruit, whole grains and some healthy fats like olive oil. Don't eat stuff labelled "diet", it may be lower in fat but it'll be loaded with sugar.

Don't eat after 8pm. If you're hungry or feeling 'snacky', them drink a big glass of water and chew a piece of gum.

Most importantly, learn to love and accept yourself. Be proud of every pound and inch you lose. Forgive the ones you may gain. You are SO much more than a number on a scale! You deserve to be healthy and happy and to take care of yourself!!

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answers from Cincinnati on

I disagree with Stephanie B. Carbs are your friend! they have been given a bad rap but actually help you loose weight (and ur not a big as u think lol I am five two and my biggest weight was 285. I dropped down to 130 and a size 4 before my baby and was told i was to thin so now I am 155 and a size 8) the carbs you want to eat are carbs that contain resistant starches. they are hard for your body to break down so you burn more calories digesting them. these are things like whole wheat pasta, rice and potatoes. foods packed with protiens are ur friends to, I eat a ton of eggs which is another food that has gotten a bad rap (though recent studies have found that the cholestorol in eggs is the good kind) if u are not loosing weight make sure you are getting enough calories. alot of diets focus around 1200-1300 calories which can actually put u in starvation mode. registered dietians will tell you to get more around the 1500 mark (1700 if you workout a lot) as for workout dvds I love the jillian michels 30day shred dvd!

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answers from New York on

First off, good for you for wanting to do this the right and healthy way. Don't get discouraged. Loosing weight takes time. Aside from the person trainer, make sure you do PLENTY of cardio. That is what burns the most fat. The trainer can help you build muscle and tone, but you need more than just that.
As for eating. My first tip. No more white anything. Bread, pasta, rice- get all whole wheat pasta/bread and brown rice. Second- no more ground beef. Or if you are going to, get the leanest possible. 95/5. or Better yet, ground turkey. If you like fish, eat lots of it. No butter for cooking, use olive oil instead.
A great Magazine, which also has several books, is Eatingwell. Its an amazing magazine and it has quick meals, as well as more time consuming. They also have a few books, look on amazon. But there are all sorts of recipes. That are good. I have subscribed to it for probably 8 years now. Once you start cooking with it you will use alot of the basic ingredients so its not like you have to get all sorts of stuff for one meal. I highly recommend. Check out their website too.
Good luck to you.

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answers from Chicago on

GOOD FOR YOU! I'm so excited that you are not resorting to any of the band-aid tricks, tactics, and money wasters that include supplements, shakes, meal replacement, food-elimination diets, detoxing, or other fad diets that slim nothing but your wallet!

Another vote for Weight Watchers - you sound like the type of person who needs to be educated in what it means to eat and cook properly and really understand why you're doing what you're doing. WW does just that and by educating yourself you will go much further than most as opposed to just reading a book and trying to do it on your own. Personally, I'm a clean eater BUT that's not something I would ever just dive right into if I were first starting out as it can be very restrictive and a huge change.

If you've been working out and limiting your calories, you might not be eating enough. At 191 pounds you should probably be eating at least 1600 calories a day. For any woman, 1200 is the lowest you should go. You need calories to fuel basic metabolic processes in the body and if you're not feeding your body then your body will hold on desperately to its fat stores, wondering when the heck you're going to feed it again!

You mention that your fat is in your arms, legs, and buttocks - I know this isn't what you want to hear but that is really good news! Abdominal and mid-section fat is also known as visceral fat and it's really bad and hard on the organs. It's the most dangerous type. Unfortunately though, you'll probably have the hardest time shedding the fat from the areas you mention. While it is true that you cannot spot train (i.e. doing a zillion leg lifts won't trim the fat off the legs exclusively), the body does some weird things at times when it comes to fat loss - we usually start to lose it in the breasts and face first. Legs (particularly inner thighs) and butt are typically the hardest.

Your personal trainer should have you lifting weights or strength training. If not, find another one. As a female you don't have the amount of testosterone necessary to become big like a body-builder man. What you will do, however, is add muscle mass and muscle requires more fuel while at rest in the form of calories - you'll turn your body into a calorie-burning furnace! The best part about strength training, in my opinion, is that it tightens and tones everything up. Shape and definition will give your arms, legs, and butt a much better appearance.

Best wishes and I am so proud of you for wanting to do it the right way! Don't give in to the quick-fix temptations; if they really worked would we be a nation with an obesity problem? Nope!

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answers from Topeka on

The only way I can lose weight is by cutting out carbs.. or most of them anyway. I love the cookbook 500 Low Carb Recipes by Dana Carpender. She has simple, simple meals and snacks in her cookbook. None of the weird stuff that you have to go to Australia to buy (just an exaggeration there hehe).
I love the workout DVD 30 Day Shred. Also all the Leslie Sansone DVD's are great.
My first week of cutting back carbs, I lost 5 lbs. It is mostly water weight to begin with.. but it's water weight that you don't need.
My sister does Weight Watchers. It's a way of life for her now and she has lost over 35 pounds in a year. Slow and steady weight loss.

I never said carbs are bad. You can still have good carbs like whole grains just in moderation. Low carb diets have gotten a bad rap. But some people gain more weight when they eat more carbs. ALSO low fat processed items have so many ingredients and words you can't even understand. Why would you want to put something in your body you can't even pronounce? Gross~! With low carb eating, you eat fresh meats such as fish and eggs, bacon, sausage... along with veggies like salad mixings, broccoli mixed with cheese, cabbage... you can even eat string cheese, no sugar jell-o with whipped topping. There's so many options. It's clean and healthy eating.

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answers from Dallas on

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answers from Houston on

I hear you. I've been there myself and I tried diet, exercise etc and nothing was working. What finally worked for me was Weight Watchers. I was able to do the program online mad not attend any meetings. All the online tools are great and it is not really expensive. You don't have to buy there food and you can eat out and shop normally at the grocery store. The other thing is that you can eat whatever you want, no restrictions. The plan just helps you make better food choices and changes how you shop and cook, but you don't have to deprive yourself! You also will see results fairly quickly. Healthy weight loss is about 3-5 lbs a week, I lost anywhere from 2-4 per week and after a few months you really see the difference. I lost a total of 39 lbs and hit a plateau. Then I was able to keep it off for 2 1/2 years.

Now that I'm 5 1/2 months pregnant I'm not worrying about weight but I will probably do WW after the baby!

Following the program is easy, sticking to it is not always easy but if you can make it through the first few weeks, it gets easier and you start to feel good about yourself!

Hope you find something that works for you!

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answers from Chicago on

Like others have said, I've known people who have done great with Weight Watchers, especially when they go to the meetings. I personally just got back into working out, after a 5 year break. My husband and I rejoined our old gym and I take classes 3 days a week. I like classes because they challenge me more than I challenge myself on a machine. It's fun to be with a whole group of women all working out together. The first couple days were really hard, but it's been a month and it's getting easier. I feel stronger and more energetic. My favorite class is kickboxing. My arms and legs are toning up nicely after just a month, plus it feels good to release stress by kicking and punching! Good luck to you... believe in yourself and you can do it!

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answers from Detroit on

I love the at home dvd slim in six, and i purchased the belly fat cook book that has a lot of food choices that limit your sugar intake.

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answers from Phoenix on

weight watchers is the best. it is a life style not a diet. you have support, you have meetings, you have ideas at your finger tips. just have to make the commitment to go and watch it all fall off. I have seriously tried to do this at home many times and it does not work, have to attend the meetings and be accountable. Jan they advertise FREE start up and so you only pay the meeting cost which is $12. Good luck.

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answers from Atlanta on

I'm so sorry! My husband got to that point and came home one day ready to do anything. He had gotten on a scale at a local grocery store and weighed in at 398! I told him we weren't going to do any more fad diets, because he always gained it back and more with a vengence. I told him we were going to get him healthy.I started him on an absorbable multivitamin/mineral complex. He was never one to eat the wrong stuff so dieting would have been hard so we just decided to start the vitamins and just be aware of what we were eating. He lost 60 pounds without changing any eating habits and activity level. At that point he felt his weight was good enough to start running (he ran track in college) and he lost 50 more pounds. Still no diet change. This was 5 years ago and he has kept it off plus lost more.

Not all vitamins are good. Actually some are really dangerous. The one my husband used (and uses) is guaranteed to absorb. Basically when your body is getting the nutrition it needs, it can function the way it is supposed to. It is NOT supposed to hold extra weight. If you'd like to talk, I'd be glad to.

God bless,


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answers from Pittsburgh on

You are a perfect candidate for Weight Watchers! Do the free trial online and see what you think. They make it SO easy...and there are tons of easy recipes. They will do a good job of educating you on how to eat also.

And I 100% agree with the low carbers comments! The science behind this is so solid. In a nutshell, by reducing carbs your body will burn fat for energy not the carbs. But if the carbs are readily available-esp the junky ones, that is what your body burns. I don't think anyones should ELIMINATE carbs...just keep them to a low level and all good sources.

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