I Need Help with My 8 Almost 9 Yr Old and Hygiene

Updated on December 10, 2010
J.C. asks from Las Vegas, NV
7 answers

I have a huge issue... my daughter i just found out tonight is not fully washing herself, nor wiping herself properly no matter how hard my mom and i teach her... i don't know how to fix it... there has been a lot a drama in the past i'm wondering if she's rebelling or if i should worry about something more serious... PLEASE HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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answers from Honolulu on

Get this book (which is for this age group of girls). It is the "American Girl" book series. The title is called:
"The Care & Keeping of You: The Body Book for Girls."

It is written for this age group and for reading it with Mom.

I got this for my daughter. She loves it.

They have it at any bookstore or online at Amazon.

good luck,

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Albany on

Hi J., this is not an uncommon problem for her age, even for girls. My daughter is 13 and I still have to send her back upstairs sometimes to brush her teeth again!

Just keep on her, in a non threatening way, very matter of factly. Offer to actually SHOW her the proper way. I guess you don't want to shame her into it, but you can remind her gently that her friends will not want to be C. to her if she smells bad.

Often times, as soon as she's interested in boys, she will start being more careful about her personal hygiene! (then you'll have OTHER problems, tehehe)

Good Luck!


1 mom found this helpful


answers from Los Angeles on

Just want to add...sometimes kids just don't want to slow down. My daughter is always thinking and doing many things at one time. Even at 10 we have to give her reminders...did you wipe and flush? The books are a great idea! Also this is a little precusor to the many conversations you hope to be having in the future. Make it fun, keep it light and let her know she can talk to you about anything and hopefully vice versa! Take Care.



answers from Los Angeles on

This is more common than you think, so yes it's huge, but don't feel alone. With some issues, I think a person of even more authority than mom or grandma may be in order. Does she by any chance have an upcoming appt with her pediatrician? It's an important part of hygiene that girls really need to learn and your daughter is so young she just can't "get it" at this point. Her doc can explain and it won't feel like mom is hassling her.

I wish you all the best!


answers from Washington DC on

it's really fairly common. if there's been drama in the past, don't escalate it. back off, and keep your reminders gentle and non-accusatory.
she'll get it, and will do so more quickly if you don't set this up for defiance.



answers from Chicago on

Hi J., have you tried buying some "hygiene and me" books for girls? My niece had the same type of issues and when her mom bought her some books on growing up and hygiene it helped. It wasn't "mom nagging" it was her reading and learning.

I have another niece who is six and I am trying to help her with the how to wipe properly as well, I found that the feminine wipes or Kids Kandoo (sp) wipes work really well. They are flushable which helps! There is something about the wipes that helps my six year old niece do a much better job.

Good luck!



answers from San Diego on

I don't know the reason she would do this but I like the suggestions of getting books for her. The other thing I wanted to mention is to not get angry with her. Sometimes these "little issues" are caused by something else. So, with that said, encourage her with a 'pamphlet' or little book made for girls and ask her questions like "Which girl are you most like?" or "Do you like to feel clean too?"

The one thing I wanted to mention to you is do a little reward chart for her. Every time she cleans herself properly, morning and evening, she gets a star or a sticker. 5 stickers, she gets a little prize. I do this with my kids and I use stuff from the dollar store. My son gets pads and pens and little matchbox cars, etc. It will be fun for her and all around a win-win.

You may feel a little pinch in your pocketbook but now, the thing I wanted my son to do, he does now every day - no hassles - and he has kind of forgotten about the "prize bin."

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