Hyper 4 Year Old - Midlothian,IL

Updated on October 03, 2010
J.L. asks from Midlothian, IL
7 answers

My 4 year old daughter is so hyper at times and I'm starting to loose my patience with her. I'm always telling her to calm down, stop running, ect... what makes it worse she gets my 2 year old son hyper. So I know have 2 hyper kids to deal with. I know she can hear me. I just feel maybe because she is 4 now she would of calm down by now. I'm worried she could have ADHD. Could this be a phase or could this be the start of something. Any advice would be helpful. thanks.

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answers from Dallas on

I'd really recommend making sure she has plenty of time to run around and play outdoors, where her "hyper-ness" won't be such a bad thing plus she can work off some energy. Another option would be enrolling her in a sport or something. Again, if she can work off some of that hyper energy in a positive outlet, she'll be less likely to be wild at home either because she'll be too tired, she's already released the energy, or because she knows soon she'll get a chance to run around. Many kids are hyper. I was a pre-K teacher and I know what the kids really needed to calm down was a good race around the playground! Good luck :)

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Chicago on

I just replied to the mom of a 2 yr old dare devil. Check out that post if you like. Sounds like you're both in similar boats.

I definitely had the "spirited child" as my first. Read up, there's a good book about "raising your spirited child".

I do not think my child has ADHD. Nor do I. However, I think we both DO have higher than normal energy levels. We're either on or off. There's not a whole lot of mellow and calm in us.

That said, I have learned that WE need to get out of the house, run, walk, shop, play, explore, etc. We call all "outings" where we get in the car an "adventure"...as in, "Do you want to go on an adventure with me?" I rarely say where we are going, because if she's bonkers, I may have to cut some "to dos" off my list that day. I make it a point on all adventures that there's some fun in it for her, even if it's just a stop to check out toys at Target or get a slushie or to pick out cookies for being a good shopper-helper at the grocery store.

For a 4 yr old have her "help" you by finding the items on coupons. My kids will run up and down the isles finding cereal boxes (that I already know are on sale AND we have a coupon for them). I have had other moms ask me, "How do you get them to help? They are so good and happy!" My "trick" is to give them the coupons with pictures. They have to find the pictures...and usually they are SO excited that we're getting...oatmeal (and they can pick the flavor) or getting "Daddy's creamer".

Finally, about the "hearing you" thing. I've found that by saying something I know they want, like a snack, gets their interest. Then I may pair that with, "Oh, I'm glad you came in for your snack. Let's get these toys put away (set the timer for about 3mins) and when the timer goes off, I'll have your snack ready. Ready? Set. Go!" My (now a little older) kids have learned that I have "jobs" and so do they. Ex: I have to make dinner, while they clean up their playroom. Making sure my kids understand that I have jobs and so do they, helps them feel like it's fair that I'm asking them to clean up. Now, there's rarely drama or backtalking. It's just, OK mom.

Best wishes

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Seattle on

I am not quite sure why everyone always jumps straight to ADHD???

4 yr olds are "hyper"...little kids have a LOT of energy, period! Enroll her in gymnastics and take her to the park and let her run around and get all her energy out.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Chicago on

Kids being active is excellent on many levels. The self-control is what would concern me more. If you mean by hyper, having a hard time focusing on tasks at hand or struggles to tone down the energy when it's time to tone it down to cooperate with others. Like many things, it is typical for a 4 year old to be active, but the intensity is what could bring it to a level of concern. As others have mentioned, plenty of time for active play, like playing outside running around, riding bikes, sports, etc. is really good for them. TV is a time sucker that prevents time for active play and learning to play well independently, so not having tv anywhere in the day's regular routine is really helpful. Also, screen time has a negative impact on brain development (structure of the brain is still developing up through age 6 as I recall) in the areas of attention span and focus, etc. Also the chemicals used to make foods (dyes, preservatives, etc) as somebody else mentioned. These chemicals in foods can react with bodies causing behavior struggles. www.feingold.org has a lot of great information on that. Best wishes to you!



answers from Chicago on

Pay attention to what she eats and how it relates to her behavior. My parents had great suceess with the Feingold diet when my sister was little and extremely hyper. When they cut out artificial flavors and colors and additives and preservatives, she calmed down. When she had any of those (like KoolAid) she'd be boucing off the walls (and her personality would change, too).
Good luck!



answers from Chicago on

My answer for a long time was oh my daughter is just active, that was till she started school. She is 6 now and nothing has changed unless she is on her meds (which I never thought I would put her on ). Even her peditrian said oh she is just a kid nothing wrong, but she didn't live with her 24/7. Have her tested for your piece of mind and feel free to contact me at ____@____.com is very hard I know!



answers from Portland on

In addition to making regular opportunities for your daughter to physically wear herself out, you might wish to check what she eats, and what household chemicals she might be exposed to.

A large and well-controlled British study a couple of years ago showed clearly that many children became measurably more hyperactive when they drank a beverage that contained some of the more common food coloring and preservatives.

I have also seen children being tested for chemical sensitivities go from calm to bouncing off walls just a couple of minutes after having tiny amounts of some diluted chemical squirted under their tongues. I'm chemically sensitive myself, and experience strong mood swings when exposed to anything perfumed, and most household cleaners. There are shocking amounts of toxic ingredients in many of the most common commercial products homemakers trust, and they do affect many people's nervous systems. Worth considering.

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