How Would You feel....What Would You Do???

Updated on April 23, 2010
C.R. asks from Olathe, KS
20 answers

When my daughter was in first grade she was reading on a 6th grade level. She is now in third grade and is reading on a 5th grade level. Is the school not challenging her enough? I have had many issues with her school, and the principle and I do not see eye to eye on her education. I have had struggles since kindergarten with this and I am about to go crazy! I just do not know what to do. We are going to try to move before the start of school next year, but it is not for sure that we will be able to. Please Help!!!!

Okay, to answer the question many are asking - Her first grade teacher told my husband and I that when tested she was reading on a 6th grade level. We do challenge her at home, and she does take the books that I get her from the library to school. We got to the library every week to pick out books. My nephew who goes to school in another district has been tested, advanced, and challenged, and is now in 7th grade and is doing high school math. I only want the same things to be offered to my daughter. I am NOT saying she is the smartest one in her class, but as her mom it is my responsibility to fight for the education she deserves.

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S.B.

answers from Topeka on

It does sound like the school is not challenging enough for her. There is always the option of homeschooling. But if that is not within reach for you, I would suggest changing her to a different school. If the school is within the same school system, I don't see where that would do any good. And even still, she could stay at the same school, but you could work with her more on reading at home.
Education always starts in the home and should remain in the home even after school begins.

Good luck =)

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M.M.

answers from Jacksonville on

Children become better readers by reading higher level material. So go to the library and get her some middle school books.
Have her read the Little House series then have her read Anne of Green Gables. Harry Potter at about 9 or 10 is good and also in 4th grade start the Hobbit. All the Narnia books, she will enjoy them.
Brian Jacques and all his animal books, my kids loved these.
My two oldest were advanced readers, I would suggest reading the material before she does as some things on a 6th grade level and higher are not appropriate for 3rd grade.

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M.M.

answers from Dallas on

I hear what you're saying and you have a right to be frustrated. I am going to play the devil's advocate. Imagine being in charge of 18-25 9 year old children including planning lessons, activities, support material and assessments for 5-6 subjects PLUS behavior issues, dealing with tattling, kids losing teeth, kids getting sick PLUS last minute schedule changes and making sure those that were absent are back on track, etc - every single day. It is not the conducive for the teacher to create a separate lesson plan that always challenges your daughter throughout the whole day, as it is not conducive for the teacher to only focus on 1-2 low level students throughout the day. Something parents forget or don't realize that there are 18-25 students in a classroom. There is no way a teacher has the time to focus on one kid at any given time - no way, no way, no way.

The teacher has a curriculum and timeline she has to adhere by per the state and her job description. She has to focus on the group as a whole with small group settings for the high & low levels at various times. Lesson plans are generally generated one week before they are implemented. There is a lot that goes into that planning - imagine planning 6 hours of work to keep students engaged, focused and progressing for everyday - most of us couldn't plan 2 solid hours of activities including introduction, explanation, engaging their interest and keeping their interest for our own children every single day.

Along with having her tested for the GT program (gifted and talented) which, if they have the program, I would think they would have done this by now, I would send a chapter book with her to read during down time. How you approach the teacher is how the teacher will respond. If you ask to work as a team and ask what you can do help with this, you will get much further. You may disagree with this approach but it works.

Teachers are overwhelmed and they truly want the best for their students but they cannot do it alone. The state and districts have just put too much on their plates.

Home schooling may be your best bet. There is a strong community on-line and in most school districts these days. There are so many resources and groups to be a part of for the needed socialization that homeschooling is much more attainable and successful.

We all love our babies only want the best for them. And of course, ours is the only one that matters to us. But, we have to remember, if we choose to utilize the public school system there are going to be sacrifices for the high & low level kids. The public school system is mostly geared to toward the kids in the middle. The low level students have many more resources than the gifted students but that need goes with without saying.

I know I wrote a lot, but sometimes I think a full understanding of the entire situation, not just what is in our bubble, helps make the difference.

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J.G.

answers from St. Louis on

I am not sure how many people questioned this but where do you get the assessment that she was reading at a 6th grade level in kindergarten? Sorry but no matter how bad an education system is they cannot suck knowledge out of your child's brain.

Furthermore look to the people who are questioning her comprehension and not just the ability to pronounce the words and kinda get the meaning. I could be wrong but it seems to me you are making an overgenerous assumption on your child's abilities and perhaps too harsh a criticism of the school system.

As someone raised in the public schools with an extremely high IQ I can tell you that intelligence seeks out knowledge no matter what the system is like. If your daughter is failing to learn you are failing her just as much as the system.

Just saying.....

Perhaps it is because I work with my children's school to get them the best education for them. If it means trips to the library, science kits that may blow up my house, or the ever destructive art center they learn what they excel at and the school teaches the rest.

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N.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

WOW! A first grader reading at a sixth grade level! Your daughter is very intelligent! I don't have any advice but just wanted to say to you, keep up the good work with your daughter. =-)

You've obviously been making the right choices for her thus far. I'm sure you will continue to do so.

Best of luck!

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K.C.

answers from Portland on

As a teacher and a mom, I was thinking of some ideas... first of all, you can ask that your daughter be tested for the talented and gifted program. If she is identified, they would be required to differentiate their lessons to challenge ALL the students. You can provide her with outings to the library to choose some more challenging books for her to read and then ask if she can use those in her book reports or literary journals if they do that. You could enroll her in after school academic activities that would further challenge her more. I would push for the academic testing to see where she is truly at ability wise and then pursue it from there.

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C.H.

answers from New York on

It could be many factors involved! How do you know it was a sixth grade level she was reading on? Hopefully she was tested in school for a gifted and talented program when she was doing that. I agree with the poster that stated that teachers have a lot on their plates and sometimes the challenge is to get it all done and work with all of the children. If your child is that gifted then see if there is a smaller school like a private or Montessori school that will give her more individualized attention. Also she may be getting older and feeling "peer pressure" that she is different or "too smart" and may be causing herself not to read as well? Is she still as motivated as she was 2 years ago? She may be getting older and feeling more pressure from you as well? (just saying not judging as it happened to someone I knew and as soon as she loosened up her daughter flourished)

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T.H.

answers from Kansas City on

I have to second the thoughts of Momma11 as well. Something, that I know others have also mentioned, to keep in mind is that she is still ahead of her grade level. Just because she didn't advance more or "decreased" her reading level, I think you're failing to account for all the other stuff she's learned in the mean time. I mean, in K she was probably just coming in with the knowledge she had from you and any programs that she was attending. In the last 2.5 years she's also learned huge amounts in terms of math, writing, social studies, etc. There's only so much she can do at a time.

Secondly, and almost more importantly, is the fact that you have to understand that these reading tests are not 100% accurate. I don't know if they do a computer generated test or a teacher generated test, and that may be something to find out about. If it's a teacher generated test then you have to understand there is much more room for error. One teacher may not follow the guidelines and scoring exactly the way as someone else and could easily give the exact same test and come up with a different score/grade level. Also, has the testing process or actual test changed since she was in first grade to now? If so, you have to conisder a margin for error, or at least difference, there as well.

As many have already mentioned, find out about the gifted and talented program and go from there. If the school doesn't have one, then maybe you should look at either moving schools or moving districts, but before you do, see if there's anything you can do to implement one in her school, and I don't mean you necessarily have to run it or anything, but maybe they need parental support or people to write letters, etc.

I would continue to take her to the library and encourage reading at home. It's also great that she's taking those books to school so she can read them there too. I would talk to her teacher and see if there's anything that you can help her with that your daughter could do for in the class enrichment activities, because as Momma11 and others pointed out, it's not really fair to expect the teacher to plan a separate curriculum for each student. And, to the person who said schools just aren't what they used to be, I'd like to say that is partially because society is putting more and more responsibility on the school systems and less and less on the families. Also, in most average classrooms there are students all along the spectrum, and I can pretty much guarantee that there is someone in your daughter's third grade class who is reading on a Kindergarten level and their parents are expecting the exact same things from the school, principal and teacher that you are expecting.

Lastly, I would like to just say that if you do choose to move her to a different school next year, meet with the staff beforehand and make sure that your needs will truly be met there before deciding on the change.

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K.M.

answers from Kansas City on

Dear Momma11 - On behalf of teachers (who are trying to do their best )everywhere, THANK YOU!!! Your words were thoughtful and true.

I'm from this area and I'm aware of the huge budget cuts that have happened in the Olathe School District. Now, more than ever, are teachers feeling the strain.

I agree with the others to check in with the gifted program, but I also agree that at her level, homeschooling may be the way to go. Have you checked for any programs to supplement her school work? Stay persistent, and good luck!

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P.M.

answers from Portland on

I hear your concern. As an elementary student, I wasn't challenged enough and found school so incredibly boring I was on the verge of flunking out. Fortunately, the school got me some testing and rose to the challenge. I don't know whether that was voluntary, or maybe my mother asking for something different to happen.

Whatever you decide to do on the academic front, I'm sure you'll keep in mind that your daughter is far more than grades or test scores. I've been involved in one way or another with education for many years, and one of my deepest concerns is that there is far too much focus, both in middle-to-upper class families, and in standardized testing, on academic achievement, often at a cost to the "whole" child.

Assuming your daughter is otherwise happy in her school environment, I think my inclination would be to stay watchful, but allow her to be a regular kid, with lots of friends, time to play and explore her own special interest independently, opportunities for whatever sports and clubs appeal to her.

Make time and space for her to read at home, but I wouldn't make a huge deal out of it if she's resistant. You don't want her to go sour from either too much or too little adult encouragement.

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L.M.

answers from New York on

I was in a very similar situation. My daughter started reading in preschool. I was lucky enough to have a great kindergarten teacher who worked with me to keep my daughter challenged. My daughter was identified as talented and gifted, but the problem was the school would do nothing about it. That didn't happen until 2nd grade, where she was able to participate in an afterschool TAG program, that offered "fun" courses. So basically it came down to me, I would have to keep her challenged and have her do extra work at home.

I wish I could tell you that changing schools will help, but it probably won't. It's all about getting up those test scores, so all the money, time and resources are put into the children who can't keep up.

If your able, consider home schooling.

Good luck.

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A.D.

answers from Minneapolis on

Is your daughter generally happy at school? Is she engaged and interested in the subjects she is learning? Does she feel supported by her teachers and peers? If so, I wouldn't worry about keeping her at her current school for the time being. All I would ask of the principal, is to please place your daughter with the most rigorous teacher each year, then work with the teacher to see that she be given the most challenging work. Supplement that at home too, if you feel it is necessary. Start researching middle schools, and make a plan to send her to one that will be a good match for her abilites. If your daughter is miserable at school and she feels bored and unchallenged, of course you should try to find a better school for her now, but if it doesn't happen this fall, I wouldn't panic.You'll have a whole year to visit schools, research your options, and carefully make plan a, b, and c for her next move. I think it's wonderful she reads well above grade level. I would keep finding her materials that she enjoys reading and don't worry too much about the assessments, and fighting with the school administration. Not worth your energy. You know she is exceptional. Find some summer programs that will challenge her and that she will enjoy. Good luck!

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J.C.

answers from Anchorage on

I would try to get her into a gifted or advance program. If she was reading at a 6th grade level in Kindergarten then I am sure she got very little attention on reading during school because the attention needs to be on those that are not doing so well. If she is that advanced and needs one on one time to stay focused and on track, you may consider home schooling where there are not more average students who need more attention than she does.

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T.C.

answers from Colorado Springs on

Have you considered homeschooling her? I think she would thrive at home under your care. It's an idea you should consider. You can take her anywhere you want in her education.

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S.D.

answers from Topeka on

That's great how well your daughter can read I see your concern since she is reading so well what recognition has she received from her teacher not just the principle.

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L.N.

answers from New York on

it could be many factors, one of which stands out, she's not being challenged enough. firstly, your daughter is still ahead. 3rd grader with 5th grade level reading skills. that is something to be proud of.
set aside whether you can move or not. concentrate mostly if you cannot. you can always talk to her next teacher (too late for this grade), that you feel your daughter has not been challenged enough so she's falling behind even though not behind per standards because she's ahead. as her teacher to challenge her more. even if gifted programs don't exist in your current school (due to cuts those are first things to be cut), ask the teacher to create some sort of a curriculum for your daughter, and others who are ahead yet not being challenged enough.
one of my kindergarteners reads level 4 books. the parochial school they go to does not have gifted programs, not until 4th grade, but her teacher has realized her skills, and gives her more and different work compared to others. she does this on her time, for my daughter's benefit. if she had not done this i was going to ask for something like it, but she realized on her own and trying to prevent my daughter from getting bored she took her time to challenge her more. this shows me we deal with a superb dedicated teacher. you may get one or you may not, but you can always ask for more.
now mama, don't stress though. your daughter is still ahead. this summer, make some times to get some books of her choice, and allow her to read on her own. reading is like eating. once you learn, you don't forget, but the brain does get lazy if practice is not enforced.
good luck

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T.M.

answers from Philadelphia on

I was the same way as your daughter. By the time i was in third grade i was 8th grade reading (according to my dad). Also according to my dad the school stunk. They did not know how to challenge me. I got bored and tricky. To challenge myself i would find the easy way out of things. I see my daughters doing the same thing. I do not have much advice as i am learning as i go with my kids.... i just wanted to tell you that you are 100% right!! She needs to be challenged! She will get bored and lose it :(

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V.M.

answers from Erie on

Is she comprehending text on a sixth grade level or just decoding words at that level?? Not sure where you are getting this assessment info but you need to find out what that is an assessment of.
Is this a behavior problem and not an acedemic problem??
If you are concerned about what level she is reading on go to the library and have her pick out challenging books, ask the librarian for help if you need to. As long as she is ahead of grade level, i don't see the problem, but if she is screwing around, then that needs to be adressed.

S.L.

answers from Kansas City on

Not to be insensitive to teachers but schools these days are not what they were when I was in school. They've gotten so much easier and kids are not made to work up to their abilities. I would work with her at home and if you don't want to do homeschooling then get her books on higher levels and then talk about the book with her to be sure she is comprehending what she reads and not just reading the words. I think the testing is good but not 100% all the time either. I don't think I'd start moving all around as schools usually have the same amount of time for each child and they may be doing the best they can. Homeschooling is great to give individual attention and moving at your own rate if that would help. I don't know about the gifted programs, I think some don't have them anymore. Check on that and then go from there by working with her more at home.

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H.H.

answers from Kansas City on

hmm with reading I don't think you can really go backwards, maybe her tests weren't accurate in 1st grade? Usually they progress forward and plateau out on the same level eventually because once you know how to read you read and there isn't really a higher level after grade school. You either read or you don't and really don't matter what level you are at because the other kids will eventually catch up. My oldest son was reading 3rd grade level when he was 4 and in Kindergarten they had him testing with the 3rd and 4th graders on his books to keep him reading and feeling challenged. He also worked on more advanced work in Kindergarten but his 1st grade teacher wouldn't work at all in keeping him busy with more advanced work so school for him became just a social event because he really wasn't being challenged at school but he endured that horrible teacher and that year. he just didn't let stuff bother him too much and I had more challenging activities and books at home for him to do so he was learning above what he was getting at school. We had learning games on the computer for him to play that were 2-3 grade levels above his current grade and bought them up through 7th grade level so he had a variety of different learning activities to do and could do any of those levels and he played the more advanced levels in the subjects he was really good at and didn't go above his level in subjects he was weaker in.

Well this year he is a Senior in high school and has been in honor classes all through jr and high school and has taken 25 credit hours of college classes during his high school years and school has always come easy for him. He is also very popular and very easy going so makes friends easily. We were also a military family so he has been to several different schools in different states and still managed to do very well even through all the changes life threw at him.

The other kids eventually catch up to the smart ones at some point then learning becomes something they either want to do and do well in school or they start slacking off and find other things that they feel are more important than doing their best in school.

Try to be positive and don't put the school down in front of your kids or they will not even try and start slacking off because they will feel they are smarter or better than the school.

Get involved and go spend a day in the classroom and see what your kids are learning. Sometimes watching the teacher teach the class helps a lot. Your child may be advanced in certain subjects but not advanced in others.

You can't judge the education your child is receiving on reading levels. All kids read at different levels starting out but most of them will reach the same point your child is at because once you figure out the concept of reading then there is no limit and can read just about every word very quickly.

Your nephew in 7th grade. what kind of math is he doing? They actually bus him to the high school? If it's pre-algebra then he is not that advanced. If Algebra I then he is at 8th or 9th grade level as a lot of school districts have that level available for those grades.

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