How to Tell My Parents Again??

Updated on February 13, 2008
A.H. asks from Lakewood, OH
4 answers

hi everyone! this weekend i took a pregnancy test and it came out positive. my daughter is 17 months old and im not sure how well im going to be able to handle this. i mean of course im going to keep the baby!!!! im guessing when about i will have this baby, which is around the same time i had savannah, and that right before my wedding. im not sure how this is gonna work soooo close to the wedding. im already going to be soo stressed out from the wedding. put being pregnant on top of that. i dont know i guess im scared i'll miscarrie. which i almost did with my first.
ok ok now to my really important question: im only 21 yrs old and am going to have 2 kids come next yr. it was really hard for me to tell my mom and dad the first time. my mom was excited about my daughter savannah but i dont think she will be to happy about me getting pregnant so fast. my dad freaked out because i wasnt going to college well i was pregnant. plus me and dominic are not married yet, so i know we are going to hear something about that from his family. i dont know i wish i didnt have to tell anyone! well i guess im wondering if anyone is have a similiar problem. im calling my doctor to double make sure im really pregnant and if so how far. i dont want to sound selfesh but i dont want to have this baby this close to my wedding. i dont want to be huge or even just givin birth like a few days before. ok i figure the baby will be do may or june. well im getting married in june. :( we only have a two bedroom house and trust me we are not loaded with money to go a get a bigger place. my boss is talking about making me management, but if im pregnant, i cant do it. i know they say every pregnancy is different but with my first i was sick all the time and couldnt work. then i would need time off after having this baby. although on one hand dominic is talking about getting a really good job that has benifits and all. which i've been trying to get him to do for the past 2 yrs. im sooooo scared! i know after savannah i was really depressed, i dont want to get like that again. hows savannah going to deal with the new baby? if i have a boy is it ok for him and savannah to sleep in the same room after he starts sleeping through the night, or could i get in trouble for that? if i have this baby after my b-day then i will not be insured anymore. what can i do?
wow ok well thank you for listening to me vent about this. i just have so much on my mind and no one to talk to other then dominic. i dont want to say anything to anyne until im 100% sure.
thank you!!!!!!!

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answers from Cleveland on

I think the others gave some good advice, but I just wanted to add that it's totally ok for the 2 kids to share a room for the first few years, until they start noticing gender differences, so don't worry about that.
If you don't have benefits, you could consider a midwife for the delivery, which would be quite a bit cheaper than a doctor. Dominic sounds like he definitely needs to step up with the job thing, though, because benefits would give you a lot of peace of mind : )

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answers from Cleveland on

I totally agree with Jackie... See a Dr. first to confirm the pregnancy, move your wedding date if needbe, and try to only worry about the "known's" right now. I'm sure that is easier said than done but you can only control so many factors. You are an adult and capable of making, and living up to, your own decisions. Of course we all want our family's approval but this is life...we can't please everyone all of the time.
Everything happens for a reason. One step at a time, one day at a time... it will all work out:)

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answers from Cleveland on

Oh wow! First and foremost -- congratulations! I can't imagine what life must be like for you right now, but it seems like your roller coaster of mixed emotions is totally natural. Especially with all the great things you've got going on in your life. My advice is to focus on the known variables. Find out your due date. Make sure you're healthy. Move your wedding if you need to. Figure out how to fit your new baby into your home. And also focus on the positives: Savannah's going to have a sibling! You're getting married to, presumably, the love of your life! You've got a career that's advancing! Some people would love to be in your shoes.
Finally, don't stress about the unknowns - you don't know for sure if you'll be sick, or depressed or have no insurance or that your parents may be disappointed. You can only cross those bridges when they arise. And, regarding your parents, it's always nice to have their approval...but you're an adult and you are more than capable of making, and living up to, your own decisions. They might not approve at first, but you have plenty of time to prove to them how great this new baby will be to your family and your relationship!
My parents weren't thrilled when my husband & I got engaged at 21...he was a tattooed punker kid back then and I guess they were hoping I'd hook up with some nice accountant or something. Well, I was so upset that I didn't have their approval - it sucked because it was supposed to be a happy occasion and they weren't happy about it! - but I convinced them that the future was going to be great for us and, as it turned out, it is. He's a successful entreprenuer now and we have an awesome life together. That's partly because we try not to stress about things we can't control and always focus on making the best out of the positives! You can do the same. Good luck and stay healthy!

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Cleveland on

I don't know how to tell your parents but I noticed our daughters are so close in age.My name is Dannielle and my daughter is Gaby born April 21, 2006. I had her at lakewood hospital and I loved it there. I live in Middleburg Hts. and would like to meet some new friends. If you want you can email me at [email protected]

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