How to Show Im Attracted to My Hubby

I would explain that you have a problem with your body the same as he does his. Then ask him if he still finds you attractive, and he says yes, I would say exactly!!! That is my point, EXACTLY!!! I would point out the fact that you both have changed and that you both have insecurities about your bodies, but if he finds you attractive then how could he expect less of you. I would also explain that you aren't so shallow of a person that you are attracted to just looks, but rather the entire person. The scars and being heavier is what happens in time and they are just book marks showing where you two have been together throughout your marriage. They are proof that there is love and affection that is much deeper than the surface.

My husband is very attractive,but just had 22 lipomas removed. He looks like he got into a knife fight and lost. I personally don't even look at them. I don't care in the slightest, but I can tell you that every scar will remind me of having to go through the whole ordeal and it will remind him that I was right there by his side. My 2 C-sections left my stomach not close to what it was and he swears it doesn't bother him at all and I truly believe him. If it weren't for those surgeries we wouldn't have two of the four children we do.

C.,
This is what you do. Send the kids off for the night and plan a romantic dinner and dress in a sexy outfit. Feed eachother and enjoy your time together. I would sometime put on a strip show or place food on certain parts of my body for him to eat. Be creative, it will leave him wanting more.
C. B

It sounds to me like the problem isn't in your attitude toward him, but in his attitude toward himself. If you're feeling bad about yourself, you suddenly view compliments as patronizing and false. You don't believe them, no matter how many times you hear them. You think people are just pitying you.
My husband has gone through a period like this. Keep up the compliments, but never over do it or he REALLY won't believe you! I don't know if this is something you're used to doing, but step it up a little in the physical affection department. Instead of just saying that you like how his jeans look on him, say something like, "ooh, your butt looks good in those jeans," and give it a playful slap. He can't say hmmmm to that!
Not that guys are good at opening up, but if the moment happens to present itself, ask him if anything is bothering him. Ask him how he feels about his scars. He may feel uglified. Listen and don't talk until he's done. Then maybe you could explain how you're self conscious about your stretch marks just like he's self conscious about his scars (if that's what he talks about), and just like your stretch marks don't bother him, his scars don't bother you one bit.
Sometimes it helps to have a glimpse into how the other person may be feeling. It can change your whole attitude toward him. And if you act toward him as though he's having low self-esteem, and he really is having low self-esteem, you'll probably see some changes in him. If not, you may (or rather, I may) be barking up the wrong tree.
Good luck!

Heres what I would do, Get a babysitter for the night. Get a wonderful bottle of champagne and strawberries or a wine. Make his favorite dinner with candle light. Put on some very mellow music and try to get him to relax with a massage. i think you could take it from there =)

Tell him what you told us. Again.

Have you ever read "The Five Love Languages"? Perhaps verbal words of affirmation is not his love language but it is yours?

Exercise helps me to feel more attractive. It helps my husband too. Perhaps finding a new hobby together that includes a little physical activity would help.

I know with my hubby it takes showing him. Putting a little action in my words makes the words go a lot further. I know it's not always easy with little ones around. Since he's been working at home, we'll occasionally just lock the door while the kids are otherwise occupied (nap for the littlest). He loves that I am the one who initiates. All the words in the world never made him feel attractive. Since we've been doing this, he's even lost 15 pounds! Unfortunately, I'm gaining since I'm pregnant, but it's been fun to watch our weight together, especially since it was his idea.

I know you wrote your response already. I think actions speak louder than words. Be physical. Not meaning just sex. Hug him, hold his hand, cuddle, sit close to him on the couch and lie close to him in bed. Maybe while you're close to him physically, you could then reiterate what you feel verbally. Good luck!!

You are so sweet. I have one word for you - massage. People with eating disorders who received regular massages got better. You can do the same thing for him. Get a book or get into a massage school, this can also heal a lot of trauma from those surgeries, which can make a person feel more like a piece of meat than a human being. Good luck.