How to Prepare for Baby If Not Finding Out the Sex - Thoughts on Finding Out?

Updated on May 10, 2010
S.J. asks from Cherryville, MO
17 answers

I am hoping I have the strength to hold out and not find out the sex of our baby. I really want it to be an amazing surprise on his/her birthday. That being said, what do I register for? I am worried that I will miss out on all kinds of "cute" things geared toward each sex (I mean come on, look at a size newborn pink dress in the mall!) by not buying or registering for sex specific gifts.

Also, how do I decorate the baby's room not knowing gender? Any paint color and theme suggestions? I would love to hear your thoughts and ideas during our exciting time!

Thanks moms!

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answers from Augusta on

With my daughter that we didn't find out about we did Classic Pooh alphabet, very gender neutral.
I'd suggest yellows or greens for neutral colors. Or even using a tan, antique white for walls so you can change decorations w/o worrying about color clash.

4 moms found this helpful


answers from Kansas City on

We decorated in Winnie the Pooh, which we love and is gender neutral. Noah's ark is also gender neutral, and if you love animals is a great one.

I chose to find out, but only because I had to have a ton of ultrasounds b/c they didnt think I had enough water and the suspense was killing me. :-)

2 moms found this helpful

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answers from Kansas City on

We didn't find out with either of our two, and both ended up being boys! We just had a good amount of plain white onsies, and a lot of gender neutral baby sleepers, which is pretty much all they are in at least for the first few weeks anyways. We did a black and cream toile print for the nursery, and painted the walls a tiffany green color. With this, and others, you can always add in more gender specifics after they are born. You can add their name on the wall in pink/blue, pink/blue accent pillows, etc. Especially with my first I just felt so much joy in actually being pregnant and having a baby, I didn't care at all what the sex was. There are very few things that can be surprises anymore, and this one is definitely the best of all.

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Austin on

We used Sandra Boyton 's set , It was a in all pastel colors..

You can return and exchange all clothing. So pick out the things you like boy and girl and let people purchase what they like from your choices.. It really will not matter about anything except clothing..

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Fayetteville on

We didn't find out what our daughter was. I would suggest not registering for any clothing (it turns out to be a pain, often times, because people will get seasonally inappropriate clothing, and clothing that you wouldn't dress your child in anyway). Ask for giftcards for clothing items, and go shopping after baby is born.
You will not miss out on cute items. As far as choosing an item for bringing baby home, choose an outfit for a boy and a girl, keep the tags on, give the outfits to a good friend or family member closer to the birth, and when baby is born, have friend wash clothes, bring to hospital, and then return the other outfit for the other sex.
For gender neutral themes, pick something that is nature themed, such as trees, leaves, those sorts of things, with soothing colors, and paint the walls a nice shade of tan, sage green, or other neutral color that you like. You can make all kinds of crafty ideas for the nursery, if you choose, and even decorate with gender appropriate accessories when he/she is born.

Not finding out the sex of the baby is extremely exciting. Go for it. :)

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Raleigh on

We found out the sex of our son, but we still registered for more gender neutral items. Most things were green/navy blue (it sounds boyish, but if we eventually have a little princess, she will use the same stuff). Most of the baby items that you would want/need to have come in non-gender biased colors, and maybe at your shower ask for a few gender neutral clothing basics just to get you started. Most people won't buy you tons of clothes until you find out, so you shouldn't end up with oodles of green and yellow.

As for the room, we did our sons in a very simple safari theme. We painted the walls yellow, and the set had yellow, blue, green, orange, purple and pink in it. Just look for something that has lots of colors, and you should be fine!

Congratulations on your new little one!

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Portland on

You can get lots of stuff that is gender neutral- such as medical supplies, stroller/carseat, bath items like toys/bath.
Any other items such as clothes, you can just say in the invite that since you aren't finding out the sex, gift cards or receipts are much appreciated.
Good luck, I know its hard. We didn't find out with our first, and now that I'm pregnant with our second, I feel like I MUST find out! :)

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Provo on

I never found out the sex of my daughter. This was not because I didn't want to but because the insurance would not pay for a second ultrasound. I just told people to get furniture. bath items, toys etc. I know there are a lot of cute things out there but it always seemed more convenient for me to get my own baby clothes since I was the one changing diapers. A lot of clothes are really extra cute but a pain when it comes to changing diapers. Most of the time little onsie jammies are cute for either sex. The color blue can even go for a girl but I don't think pink can go for a boy.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Pocatello on

One of my friends didn't find out the sex of her baby so this is what she did. She had a shower and just got lots of cream, yellow and white stuff. She actually didn't get that much cloths and asked for things that are easy to get without knowing the sex of the baby like bottles, diapers, wipes and blankets. And as for the all big stuff she, like me got everything to go for either sex. I new what I was having but I just thought if my next is a boy I don't want to go out and by a new stroller/carseat, bouncy chair, high chair, swing and pack&play so all that stuff i got in green and creams. My friend also did a beautiful nursery in creams. She figured once the baby came she could then accent it with blue or pink things like on the shelves and walls. Then once she had the baby her close family gave her another shower at her home when the baby was about 2 weeks. She had a girl so they all bought her a few pink outfits and hair bows. It really worked out great for her that way.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from New York on


Yes, those cute little pink dresses are adorable. However, you don't need any cute outfits, you'll get those once the baby is born.

As far as paint color, the sky's the limit (literally) you could paint the room blue with clouds, and then add airplanes if it's a boy or a flower garden for a girl. There are tons of decals out there to choose from. Yellow, green, tan, are all great colors for a room. Do some window shopping at the stores you want to register at and find a theme that you like.

As far as registering, register for things in all price ranges...
car seats (you may want 2 one for your car and one for hubby's)
matress pads, sheets
hooded towels
receiving blankets
infant carrier
diapers and wipes and more diapers and wipes

Note: I got so many clothes my daughter (no I did not know the sex of the baby until she was born, the same with my second) only wore some of them once.

Have fun shopping!

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Dallas on

I didn't find out and we painted the nursery a green that was a little darker than a mint green. We found a green and brown monkey pattern that we still love 13 months later. I figured with a pale green nursery it would be easy to add pale pinks or pale blues and the room would look nice. We had a little girl and all the pink girly stuff looks great with the green. Since we knew we were planning on having more than one baby for the basics we registered for gender neutral stuff, which I would of done anyway even if we did find out. We did buy one girl outfit and one boy outfit for the leaving the hospital outfit, and we just returned the boy outfit. I loved waiting to find out the sex, and plan on doing it again. It wasn't that difficult as far as planning not finding out. Also, it was a lot of fun doing the clothes shopping myself anyway.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Portland on

I had my daughter long before ultrasounds were available. Seems to me that in those days moms bought lots of yellow and green onesies, blankets, etc., and universally-useful gifts for baby showers.

You can always fine-tune clothing and nursery colors after the birth, and if you have friends with little ones, they will probably pass along lots and lots of cute, gender specific clothing when the news is out. A special newborn outfit for either sex will not have been worn much, especially frilly girl things. They are more for photo-ops than everyday drooling.

Consider not going overboard on gender-specific nursery decorating. A race-car or princess theme doesn't mean much to a one-year-old. You'll probably want to change that again in a couple of years anyway.


1 mom found this helpful


answers from Pittsburgh on

I'd suggest asking for minimal clothes on your registry... people tend to buy clothing that isn't even on your registry, in addition to what you do put on it, so you end up with a TON of clothes, much of which you end up returning or not using anyhow. I'd suggest registering for all your "necessities" like your bottles, carseat, stroller, pack-n-play, towels, bath accessories, that sort of stuff, and use the gift cards or monetary gifts you get to do some gender specific clothes shopping after the baby comes.

As for carseats and strollers, crib bedding, etc., you can really get some nice gender-neutral stuff. There are some really nice patterns out there that could be used for either boys or girls. You'll just have to look around to see what you like. Personally, I got the whole way-too-expensive crib bedding set and all the matching accessories in a Noah's Ark theme for my son's room, and found it was such a waste. It really is purely decorative. When we moved out of my son's father's house, we left his Noah's stuff for him to have there, and I got a super-soft fleece-like bumper pad, a matching super-soft blanket, and crib sheet, all in a solid green, and I loved it so much more than the fancy-shmancy bedding ensemble that I just had to have. lol It was just so soft and cozy for my son, and that was what I loved so much about it. Plus, it looked clean, and uncluttered. And if you go with plain bedding like I did, it allows you to do anything you want in the room.

As for room color, I've always liked yellow. My son's room is yellow. It's just so bright and cheery, and can be accented with so many different options for either boys or girls. We did sesame street, which in and of itself is gender neutral, but its so kid-friendly, and bright cheery colored. I also love light lime green walls for boys or girls. You really do have many options. One last thing I wanted to mention if you hadn't already thought of this... today is the day of vinyl wall decals, and there are just a million of them out there. I'd definitely consider using those for decorating your child's room. They are so easy to place, move, and remove! Then you could even wait until the baby's here to choose and put the decals up because they are so easy. Not like putting up a wallpaper border or something that you'd want to have done ahead of time. Then you could do something in the room that's a little more gender specific, if you want. Just go with a neutral wall color, and get the decals after the baby is born! There are also websites online where you can buy vinyl decal words, phrases, names, all personalized. That would also be a nice, easy way to decorate the room. And the best thing about the decals is that in a couple years, when you child is a little older, you can EASILY change the whole room's theme by changing some decals!

Good luck to you! This is such a fun time.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Birmingham on

We want to know Baby's gender but after four ultrasounds, we still don't know! So we're preparing for either. I've chosen green as Baby's color, and there is plenty of cute stuff thats neutrak!



answers from Springfield on

First off, congratulations! Good luck on holding out; it can be VERY difficult during the ultrasound to stick with it, but it is an irreplacable moment when dad gets to announce to you the sex of the baby. I didn't find out with my last child, and opted not to find out this time as well.
That being said, there are tons of themes that are gender neutral. I personally love the rainforest themed items (Fisher Price brand, but there are other companies that have very similar themes, and they look the very much the same). There's also themes like Noah's Ark, Pooh bear, Mickey and Minnie,things along that line that can be found almost anywhere and have clothes, bedding, swings, car seats, all kinds of baby gear available. Green, yellow, white, tan, and other earth tones are all gender neutral as well, and you can get the same kinds of clothes and baby gear by using only a color theme. You can buy one or two gender specific outfits for the first photos and a coming home outfit and add to the wardrobe after baby is born, and returning what you don't need.
Once you get used to looking at baby items, it gets so much easier to find neutral items. It's also beneficial if you plan on having more kids that happen to be the opposite sex of this baby to already have so much that is suitable for a boy or a girl. Good luck to you and have fun with it!



answers from Dallas on

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answers from Kansas City on

We found out what we were having with our daughter, but were still nervous about it. So we painted her room a mint green and we did a nursery rhymes theme. It was really cute! I also recommend having the sonographer actually check what you are having and putting it inside a sealed envelope to give to a family member, like your mom or MIL, and that way any gender specific stuff can be kept at their house, or give to you to keep in the box with wrapping paper still on labeled that you CANNOT look because it is gender specific!

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