How to Have a Peaceful Dinner Table.

1. Start watching Supernanny and get some good, constructive ideas for discipline and table manners.

2. Don't send him away. Take him away from the table and put him in the naughty chair/time out locale, and explain to him that he was warned, screaming is not acceptable, and when time out is over, he can apologize and hugs, come back to the table and eat.

Don't give in to his power games, Lisa. You and hubby have got to be on the same page and both deal with this. You shouldn't have to adjust the rest of you around one little 2 year old. You as parents have to let him know it's not going to fly and screaming is not a way to talk. He'll get hungry eventually. If he rejects what's on the meal table, do not reward him with letting him have something later. He had his chance.

Oh wow... I guess I am the ONLY one so far who has 3 kids who ALL have and DO behave at the table.... No, you are not an ill mannered, rude, mean spirited adult who can't control yourself... lol We have expectations on our kids that others may not insist on due to the LAX way kids are raised now adays...

Yes, we do have to be realistic about our kids abilities at any age. There will be spills, food on the floor, and you will have to tell him to sit many times. Hands will be used... :-)

Do not try to have LONG meals. Do not expect peace and quiet.
But do not give up!!!

We always pull the kids right up to the table with us. We do not use the high chair tray.

Even when infants we set them at the table with us. We currently have an 8 yr old DD, 5 yr old DS, and 2 yr old DS... WE are also expecting in the spring... Boys CAN behave. lol

Our meals are filled with lots of giggles, stories about the day from the kids and grown ups, and silly jokes from the kids. Practice at lunches!!!

Do not expect them to sit and eat and not talk. But the butts stay in the chairs and unless there is some really bad behaviour we do not "send" our kids away from the table. WE expect them to behave. And guess what? Its the same at restaurants. They sit...

It was not too long ago that kids were expected (and did) have perfect table manners. It can be done. But do not expect it over night.

If your son starts throwing a fit or doing something not appreciated at the table you or hubby need to let him know that is not supposed to happen! Tell him, If you have to take him out of his chair into a different room and get down on his level and tell him that "we don't do that while eating." Then its back to the table. Do not train him that bad behavior = freedom to do something else... If my 2 yr old is having a fit for what ever reason all I have to do is point at the wall. He goes and stands beside the wall until he's calm then he comes and sits back down until the rest of us are done.

Practice. Practice, practice, practice... When he sits nicely and behaves, complament him!!! Give hugs and kisses!!! Reward good behaviour!!! And ignore those who say that children should not be expected to behave.

WE don't have to physically discipline our kids to train them. We just have to train them AS CHILDREN and start when they are babys...

You didn't say what the issue really is...he doesn't want to eat?, he wants to get down?, is he throwing food? What IS good mealtime behavior? As you probably already know a toddler's attention span at dinner is very short. They also become very picky eaters at that age. I think what you need to do first is determine who owns the problem...the kids or is it Daddy's expectations? If the usual pattern is your little one gets in trouble at dinner and sent away for bad behavior...he is only 2, he could get a phobia about eating if he gets banned at every meal! You might be setting yourselves up for an unnecessary power struggle. I would go with feeding the two little ones earlier, maybe at their own little table. Make it fun.

Sometimes you just have to let life roll~ and go with it.
You or your husband cannot 'control' your children by force, it's not like they are on a remote. You lead by example and to me, this is learned behavior that occurs over time. If someone is going to exert control, what do you think will happen? You are going to clash heads and no one will be happy, right?

We never had an issue as we just enjoyed the ride and went with those punches. Sometimes, we even joined in on some of the silliness with our son. Mealtimes do not have to so structured... if they are, then I feel kids will not eat as well as they should (this can be why they end up fussy about sitting there). Just have fun with them as they are young for so long~ peaceful dinners are for later when they are older.

I agree with Beth. Boys can and should behave at the dinner table and everywhere. They have more energy, but don't make excuses. Set the rules and stick to it. If they don't follow the rules at the table, will they anywhere. You are making a big mistake if you don't continue to work through this. Eating separately is ridiculous. What will happen when they go to a friend's for dinner, or at a restaurant? Napkins on your lap, elbows off the table, use the serving spoons, don't slurp, etc. Enjoy your peaceful dinners when they go to college!

Hi Lisa,

Until the child is at least 4 years old, it is almost impossible for young children (especially boys) to behave at the dinner table. We had the same thing with my son who is now 4. We would sit him in his high chair and let him eat with us and when he acted up, let him out and let him play while you eat. It takes time, but eventually they come around. Two years old is too young. Try table manners at 4 years of age.

I would be careful about setting a pattern that could lead to eating problems when your 2 y/o is older. You could ask your Doctor what is the expected amount of time for eating dinner and the amount your child can actually understand. Also is your husband comparing children? they are very different I would imagine. Ask your husband in a very loving way what he thinks your two year old is thinking when Dad is yelling at him or harming him because he is frustrated. Most men have unrealistic expectations of children. Also does he think that his son will want to be around the person who is upset, angry, frustrated with him. Why is he soo upset about a 2 year old really? I am sure he will do fine in a few years, but the stress of being around a mad mean Daddy every night may make your son NOT want to be around that guy. What is more important?
If you were talking about a 5 or 6 year old it would be different but really a 2 year old. Mom you need to protect your son. Good luck

Eat out once in awhile and leave the kids home with a sitter. Mealtime peace at home is at least a few years away. Your husbands pushing it too early.

Discipline a 2 y/o at dinner, it is the mean spirited, rude, ill mannered adult that can't seem to control their own self. Who taught them to be so out of control. In their quest for power they intimidate a child...until the adult learns to control their anger, they should suck it up and walk away, until they can control their sadistic behavior, and regain their composure.