How to Handle 3 Kids

Updated on September 15, 2010
S.C. asks from San Jose, CA
7 answers

I'm expecting my 3rd in a few months. When this baby is born I will have a 5 yr old girl, 17 month old girl and this baby. We don't know the sex and are keeping it a secret until the birth. My husband and I work full time as well. For anyone who has 3 kids with this age difference, I am open to any and all advice to keep me sane! Thanks in advance

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answers from South Bend on

Relax......I am working on adding a 4th to my family. I really felt the hardest transition was from 1 to 2 kids. Going from 2 to 3 kids was a lot easier, because you already have learned how to divide your time/attention. Be sure to not always ask you oldest to "help". The middle child will feel more important and "needed" if you have her help, too. My boy and girl were 20 months apart and he loved getting me a glass of water when I sat down to feed my baby girl, picking out her clothes for the day (with some help of course) or getting the diaper out of the holder while I changed her. The other life saver that I had was a sling. That way, when baby was fussy, I could still have two hands to help my other kids. Also, it helps for outings when I need to hold both of my older kid's hands while crossing the street, etc.

Congrats and good luck with the transition.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from San Diego on

I had 3 at one time, when my daughter was born my oldest son was 5 and my middle son was 2, It was great, i had no real issues, mu sons always played together, and my 5 year old would read stories to my 2 year old and my baby, my sons aren now 26 and 23 and are the best of friends, and my daughter is 21 and all 3 of them are very close. J.



answers from San Francisco on

Congradulations S., I am the mother of 5 and am the eldest of 10. Many of my younger cousins have 6 children. I only tell you this so you will understand my remarks.
You can do it and well but it will take some organization, patience and as much help as friends and family will give.
We as a family had to make some big decisions when # 3 came along and the first was could I possible work more than 3 days a week. the 2nd was to go buy a freezer! please get a frost free one- its alot of work otherwise. I made as many extra meals as possible and froze them. I also bought lots of paper plates and silverware so I wasn't trying to do dishes the 1st month.
I hired a 12-15 y/o on the street to come and play with the other children, to help with laundry and kitchen. or to keep an eye on things so I could take a nap if the baby fell asleep. I also learned to have my older child brought home from school by one mother from her class- daddy changed his schedual to take to school. Sleep how and when you can, since sleep deprevention is a given. But I can promise you that it will all come together and work well after a few months and a few nights sleep. I know that my daughter in law calls me when she needs any help and it gives me a chance to go and do whatever it is she needs. But let your church, friends and family get the chance to help.
Again enjoy the surprise of boy or girl and having a new baby in the house.



answers from Chicago on

I had a larger gap between my 3 and what I would advise NOT doing is to give your 5 year old too many "chores". Yes it makes them feel important but when they're already sharing the stress that is a new baby in the house, it sometimes makes them feel burdened by the responsibiltiy.
Other than that, I didn't find going from two to three that much worse. You're tired with a new baby no matter how many you have!


answers from Dallas on

The Walton Method - You know - Good Night John Boy
Each one teach one - each kid is responsible for the one directly under them. Your 5 yr old is, I'm sure, a 2nd moomy to your 17 mo old already. She will be a great help and fetcher when you have the 3rd. The 17 month old is going to be tricky. She isn't old enough to want to share mommy with a new little one. But soon she will be best buddies with your new little. That will take a lot off of you, once they start keeping each other busy.



answers from San Francisco on

I also have 3 children about the same age spread. I worked and my husband's work kept him traveling about two weeks a month. What kept me sane was we had an au pair. It was a fabulous experience for the kids, and was not that expensive. I loved it because I could focus on the baby and not feel bad that I couldn't take the oldest to the park because I was so tired. It was nice having an extra set of hands when we all went places. She did the kids' laundry, straightening up etc, so I could just spend time with the kids. I could go on and on, it was much more than just childcare. I feel it was an investment in our family.



answers from San Francisco on

I too have three children. 4,5 and 7. When my youngest was born my eldest had just turned 3. Each are 18 months apart in age. Yes, it was hectic at times....that first year was a bit of a blur, especially because we were new to the city, had few friends, no family and my husband travelled away for work regularly. However despite those challenges, it has been great having children so close in age. My children are great playmates and all love playing the same games. They are never bored with one another and have great imaginations. Seeing them together makes it worthwhile having them so close together. I wouldn't change it for the world. Best of luck... R.

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