How to Get Started with Potty Training?

I'm paying close attention to this thread on behalf of my 22-month-old girl, but I can pass on a great piece of advice I heard for overnight training: make up her bed with TWO sheets (cloth, plastic, cloth, plastic). Then if there's an accident, you can strip off the top 2 layers and you're ready to jump back in bed.

I let my two year old son pick out some big boy underwear and we put them in the bathroom, still in the package and he couldn't have them until he was going on the potty. I would let him hold them while he sat on the potty, but we didn't open them until he had actually pooped on the potty. This was after he had shown interest on his own and had gone pee on the potty a few times. I have also heard about not letting them have their potty and underwear until a certain age, so it was something that they looked forward to and also with it being something they couldn't have, they show more interest in it. Good Luck and really if she doesn't want to go, I would stop trying to make her and put it all away for a few months and try again later, the last thing you want is a battle of wills with a two year old, it's really not worth it. My first son had to do it in his own time and we had a long battle and if I had to do it all over I would have waited until he was three. Stickers are good rewards also.

Luckily, my daughter was potty trained right around her two-year old birthday. A lot of it had to do with when SHE wanted to do it. We had the potty since 17 months and it sounded a lot like you...she would sit on it every now and then and "pretend", especially when I was going potty, until one day she just went! We started with having her naked throughout the house and always having the potty close by. There were only a couple accidents with this. Another thing I used was a sticker chart where she got to put a sticker up everytime she sat on the potty. Then it turned to putting 2 stickers if she actually went. You could also try stamps. My daughter loves stickers and stamps. I would have her sit on the potty with her dolls "watching" (and her baby brother, too). I would read her the girls' potty book. She's nowehere near being potty trained at night (a whole other ball game), but she is during the day, which makes it really nice. Remember to make it a fun and stress-free experience (which it sounds like you already are doing that). It's all in their own time with a lot of encouragement from you! Best of luck!

I know you are against a food based bribe and I was too. I was ADAMENT that I would not use treats to potty-train my daughter. But she did the same things your daughter is doing. I knew that my daughter knew HOW to use the potty - she was just being stubborn about it. So I bought 5 or 6 potty-training books that spanned decades in terms of when they were published and every single one of them suggested using a treat to potty-train, so I gave in and tried it. And it worked immediately and easily. I combined the treat with underwear - I bought a lot of pretty pairs of undies and talked it up about being a big girl and wearing underwear like mommy and then I explained that she would get one M&M when she went pee in the potty and 2 M&Ms if she went poop. Then I put a plastic container on the back of the toilet filled with M&Ms and it worked like magic. She had some issues with pooping on the potty that took a little longer (and required a sticker chart and pink tutu for a prize), but as for just peeing in the potty, she did it every time with no accidents once the M&Ms were introduced. After a couple weeks, I sent her to my mother's house for a few days and conveniently "forgot" the M&Ms. She got used to going potty without them and I never used them again. When she got home, I simply told her I was out of them. A few weeks of M&M bribery was well worth the results. Good luck!

I just finished with potty training my daughter. She will be 3 in two weeks. I wanted to start her training around two also and although she was interested in the potty, sitting on it etc., she didn't want to go in it. I was ready and she was not. So I backed off for awhile. Even removed the potty chair which was a big surprise to her. After a few months and when she was keeping dry through the night I brought the potty chair back out and when I knew she had to go (it had been awhile, or she'd been drinking a lot) I would take all her clothes off, give her a blanket and allow her to watch a DVD while sitting on the potty. She started to get the idea with this method and would be sooooo excited when she'd pee in the potty. We eventually moved the potty back to the bathroom and introduced treats. One gummy bear for pee and a dumb-dumb sucker for poop. Once both got going well, poop took a little longer, I backed off on the treats....told her we were out of them and viola, toilet training with no issues! YEAH!!! I've even got her comfortable with going anywhere at anytime, grocery store, rest area etc., at first she was aprehensive of going in a strange place but once we got it done she built confidence and is fine with it now. Another tip, when we stopped using the potty chair at home and graduated to a toilet ring and a step stool I put the potty chair in the car. That way if we're out and about on the road and she has to go I don't have to worry about finding a restroom quickly for her, we have the potty chair in the back of the SUV for emergency use!

We potty trained our daughter at about the same age and were experiencing the same problems. I got over my treat aversion and started giving her 2 m&ms if she was successful and it worked like a charm. She just needed a little something to make her feel special. We did keep up with the treats from time to time until she was almost 4 but, hey, she used the toilet and I couldn't ask for more.

I have a boy who just turned 2 and an older son who is 3 1/2. Our oldest is potty trained (except we still have trouble with poopies), but we have been introducing potty training to our younger son since he was 18 months old. We made a household rule that everybody has "potty practice". The boys sit on the potty (when we first started this, they got to decide if they had clothes on or off. Now, they both take off bottoms and sit down). We read books or play a game for five minutes (I use books and a game that they only get to play with during these practice sessions.) I set up a timer so they know when it goes off that they "practice" is over. They get to choose a sticker just for doing their "potty practice" from start to finish. If they pee, then they get a few M&M's or some miniature marshmallows. If they poop, then I have a basket full of little toys I got at the Dollar Store.

I first introduced "potty practice" about a half hour after a meal, just once a day. I gradually increased the practices sessions so that now we do it in the morning when they first get up, about a half hour after every meal, and before getting into jammies at night.

The purpose of having a "Potty Practice" rule in our household is to get them comfortable with sitting there, to eliminate any power struggles, and to teach them that everybody has to slow down and listen to the needs of their bodies.

I really love the book, "Mommy, I have to go Potty" by Jan Faull, M.Ed.

I hope this helps!

Maybe you could transition her to panties or cloth diapers? As a childcare provider specializing in toddlers for many years, I have found this to be effective. In my personal opinion, Pull-ups do little to change their thinking about using the potty, since they do not feel wet. I know there are some that have a liner that "feels wet." Summertime is actually a perfect time to make this transition if you live in an area where the weather is warm. You can let her run around outdoors in panties (with a soaker cover or something, if you prefer) and then if she has an accident, it is really no big deal, but she will be able to feel the difference. I don't know what type of diapers you use, but there are TONS of cloth options out there now which are very user-friendly. As for using food to bribe, two-year-olds are very easy to please and can be persuaded with many simple things like stickers, going for a short walk, watching a favorite show, maybe a little paper doll or something small like that that would have accessories that you could add one at a time...? Or, you could just do a little happy dance that would thrill her heart and give her a big hug. I hope this helps in some way. Blessings to you and your dear one! :)

I'd encourage you to get the book "Toilet Training in Less Than a Day" by Nathan Azrin. He developed a method for toilet training the severely mentally retarded, and then adapted it to young children. First it has information on readiness, so you can be sure your child is physically ready. It's an old book, but still in print. I used the method many years ago with both my children, a boy and a girl, and in about 8-12 hours, they were toilet trained during the day. Staying dry all night is a readiness thing that took a little longer. Good luck.

A., you sound just like us! First I would say that when kids are really ready, it happens pretty quickly (at least that was ours and our friends' experience). Otherwise, they still don't quite get the feeling of it all, can get nervous and you all will just be frustrated. We got our little girl her potty at 15 months old because she was really interested in what we were doing. She peed once on it at 16 months old and not again for about a year. We backed off and let her just get used to it being there (and collect dust). ;-)

About two months before she turned 2 1/2 she got more interested and started peeing on the potty about once a day. At that point I made her her own potty chart (which she helped pick the colors for) and she was excited about adding stickers to it each time she peed. When she didn't feel like using the chart, so be it, it's hers. About the time I thought it was going to take forever to progress past one pee-pee on the potty a day, she had a big breakthrough and peed all day on the potty and then POOPED that same night!

That's when I decided that we weren't going to buy anymore diapers and when we ran out we were done - that was our biggest breakthrough. She was peeing on the potty more than once a day so I bought a bunch of toddler panties (the Gerber cotton kind with the extra layers of cotton in the middle). I made a big deal about them and let her pick out which style she wanted that day. I bought some pull-ups for nap and bedtime and had to (reluctantly) use them sometimes during the day when she was really having a hard time adjusting to it all. It took about 3 days of her having a hard time not getting to wear diapers. Within a week of no more diapers, she was not using pull-ups during the day unless we were going to be away from the house. A week after that and we could start doing things (like going out to dinner) as long as we kept it within 2 hours (she was terrified of big toilets). We bought a mini Baby Bjorn potty in the car so if we're out for many hours, she could have a place to go potty - she thought that was funny because she gets to "go potty in car" (she thought that's what "potty train" means - LOL).

She did have a bunch of accidents (the most being about 3 changes of pants during the day) but was making it through most days dry. The accidents seemed to really do the trick. She hated wetting her pants, and really started to figure out what it felt like before she went.

She isn't potty trained at nap/bedtime and she wears a pull-up while in bed. I don't expect that to happen for awhile. She was getting up to pee when we switched her to a full-sized bed and staying dry at night. But now that she's used to her bed, she's back to usually peeing at night.

I honestly dreaded the idea of potty training and thought the whole process was daunting. What I have learned is to go with the flow (no pun intended). Let her get used to the potty, don't push things, and reward her when she does go. The two things that really helped us was the potty chart and ditching the diapers when we knew she was ready for the next step. It went amazingly quickly (like 2 weeks)! When we felt like the potty chart did it's part (about a month later), I added the date on the back and laminated it so she has something to hold on to. She's been potty trained for four months and she'll turn 3 in October.

I hope this helps some. But don't worry if it takes awhile. I know our little girl wants to be a "big girl" one minute and plays being a "baby" the next. It's a lot of big changes for them. Good luck and most importantly, have fun! :-)

I didn't do any reward system with my son. I didn't ask him if he had to go, because this gave him an option and when they are starting to potty train, you don't want to give them the option to go...they are more likely to say no. :D
I started by establishing a routine. (I.E. When getting up, before leaving house...) Also, it takes about 15-30 min for food/drink to digest. Watch for cues. During the day...no diapers/pull ups. It's messy, but well worth it. Watch her cues. Her body will cue in as to when she has to go. This is something that will take time, consistency, and a bit of routine.
When you move into night training, purchase a plastic fitted sheet for her bed. (Saves on the mattress. :D) Make sure she is fully done with day training before you move to night. One thing at a time. Have her get into the habit of going to the potty right before bed. Then wake her up and have her go before you head to bed. Then get her up once or twice in the middle of the night to go. (This part is very tedious and takes awhile to get the hang of, but in the end, she'll learn how to use the potty in the middle of the night on her own. They can't hold it in all night.) Then have her go as soon as she gets up.
Remember, don't ASK if she has to go, lead her in the direction of the bathroom and politely urge her to go. That's what I did and my son was potty trained within four months. Do remember that each child is different and it might take longer or less time. :D

My best bribe I found when potty training my daughter when she was 2 was daddy. Over the weekend he encouraged her just sitting on it, then everytime she went potty we called him and if he didn't answer we would leave him a message together. He would call back several times throughout the day to congratulate her. He would cheer, laugh, sing, get loud, clap and just really excite her. When he got home he would throw her in the air and give her extra attention and tell her how proud of her he was. We also got other family members involved. We would call whoever she wanted to brag to grandma, uncles, anyone. They would tell her how wonderful it was and how she was getting bigger.She was so proud and it worked great. I am a stay at home mom and I think having other family being such a big part of potty training made it a little more special for her.

I saw some responses said to wait until they are dry at night. If I did that, my 11 year old would still be in diapers! Enuresis (bed wetting) is not necessarily a good indicator of potty training readiness since:
Bed wetting is a problem that affects nearly 20 million Americans. Bedwetters are (at any one time)...

One of every 4 five-year-olds.
One of every 10 six-year-olds.
One of every 14 seven-year-olds.
One of every 20 eight-year-olds.
One of every 33 ten-year-olds.
One of every 50 seventeen-year-olds.
One of every 100 adults.
(You can get more informatin at http://www.hargitthousefoundation.com/causes.htm)

Anyway, back to the actual training... Due to allergies, food rewards were not a viable option. I made a sticker chart with random dots on some of the squares. They received one sticker for sitting for the duration of the ABC song (it's amazing how slowly I could sing it!), two for urinating and three for a bowel movement. When a sticker landed on a dot with a square, they got to pick something off the potty rewards chart we came up with together (eg: read with mommy, play trucks with mommy, put on makeup, play baseball in backyard, etc.).
I finally trained my boys (now 11 and 9) at 4 years old. I kept waiting until they wanted to. It never happened. Finally, since we were using cloth diapers, they outgrew the diaper covers we were using so they no longer had a choice in the matter. We had potty success using a timer (every 20 minutes at first), the above reward system, and excitement and consistency on my part.
Don't worry. It will happen. It helped me to remember that you don't see (or hear of) too many people getting married in diapers. ;) It doesn't seem to matter too much "when" they are trained as "how" -- lots of encouragement and excitement for "success".
Have fun! This won't last forever!
C.

Potty training is always 2 steps forward, one step back. We did it slowly for about a year, changing bribes from m&m's (which worked great for a long time) to a big potty chart that meant a trip to dairy queen when it was full. Getting rid of diapers and switching to pull-ups (which were her job to get on and off) or panties with covers also helped. Giving her responsibility (and letting her clean up the accidents) instead of me nagging constantly also helped. It's not easy to motivate a kid, but my daughter was fully potty trained 2 months before she turned 3 and has never looked back. Slow and steady with lots of bribes, I say!

Hi, I wanted to respond to question telling you that you have nothing to worry about. I have been a nanny for the past 11 years and worked in a daycare center with the 2 year olds for 2 years. I also have a 3 year old of my own. You are actually starting on the early side of 2. Most children aren't really ready until about 2 1/2 or 3. I do have some suggestions to make it fun though. With my daughter I purchased a small sticker book and a big variety of assorted stickers. Everytime she sat on the potty she would get to pick a sticker and put it anywhere in the book. If she actually went potty she would get 2 stickers. After so many days had gone by we would sit down and look at the book together. This made it fun for her to see what she had done. By the time the book was full she was completely potty trained. Another thing we had was the potty elmo doll. He comes with his own potty chair and wears underwear. He sings songs when he is put on the potty, and tells them it's ok if he doesn't make it in time. I hope this helps. Remember she will let you know when she is ready.

My daughter just turned two, and all of a sudden she decided by herfelf that she wanted to go on the potty. She also has had one for quite a while. I have put her in panties, or her bathing suit on hot days, and she was able to pull them down, and just go. I have the potty in the living room, easy access. Also, I made a chart for her so that each time she goes, she gets to pick out a sticker and put it on. Also, I bought her some of those kids flushable wipes, and she loves those. They are sitting next to her potty. She also likes to wear the pull ups. They are easy to get down, and can catch an accident when you are not home or near enough to a toilet.

With my first son I was about 2 months from having a second baby, and he was nearly 3, and I would ask him all the time if he wanted to start using the potty like a big boy. He would always say "no". I had no clue what to do... So one day I decided I didn't want two in diapers, and I bought him lots of underwear, and just put him in the underwear and stayed close to the house for a few days, and stayed close to him. He would be running around then stop all of a sudden and look at the floor. Then he would pee in place. As soon as he started I would scream (as I realized what he was doing - on the carpet). Then I'd grab him by the hand and we'd run to the bathroom and he would do it there. It only took a few times and he started getting pretty good at going to the bathroom. Poo was different. He would beg me for a diaper (to poo in it) and I would refuse, so he would constipate himself for days. For some reason he was afraid to go in the toilet. So for a month or so he would poo in his underwear. Eventually he got it.

So then for the second guy I decided I wanted to do it a lot sooner, so I started before he turned two and fooled with it for about six months. Then one day I happened to be in a new and used book store and happened upon a book called Toilet Training in Less Than a Day. I read it, and did it - in less than a day! It worked like a charm. He was 27 months and we've been diaper free for 7 months (except a pullup at night). People have been amazed, although it was certainly the norm to be potty trained by age two in our grandparents generation.

The book reads like a research paper, though, so I would recommend quickly skimming through it and taking notes to catch all the steps. It does involve giving snacks/treats/drinks. But, it's just for a day! It makes it very positive, and has her "teach" a doll to use the potty, along with many other steps. When they do err (which you expect) then you react in horror (much like I did unwittingly with my screaming) and teach them to run quickly to the potty, ten times. It gets the point across, and teaches them to do it in haste if it's imminent. It is empowering and gives them a world of independence.

You can get it cheap on amazon. A lot of the reviewers on amazon don't like it because they think it is demeaning to the child. "How dare they suggest to the child that it's inappropriate to pee/poo in their pants?" - that's the attitude of those reviewers. They would rather that their "gifted" four-year-olds be in diapers, than teach them what is acceptable and what isn't, and how to do it effectively. The people with those attitudes seemed to not have as much success with the program, which makes sense if they have that general attitude about child rearing and treat the child like a little spoiled prince/princess. But if you have reasonable expectations for your child and wish for her to be independent, then it works like a charm! Good luck!