How to Find a Surrogate

Updated on April 04, 2011
M.S. asks from Palo Alto, CA
4 answers

Hi - I am interested in finding a surrogate. I know absolutely nothing about it. Cost, locating one . . . Do they have agencies? My second daughter tried to come out at 21 weeks along. I had to have an emergency cerclage and went on full bed rest until she was born 1 week before her due date. I would like a 3rd, but I don't want an encore performance of what I went through. Just curious to see if anyone knows about surrogacy.

Thanks in advance!!!

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

More Answers



answers from Boston on

Yes, there are agencies. Talk to your OB for a referral.

The process is long, hard and incredibly expensive (think $50K - $100K). You and your husband will need to do IVF, which is not mandated to be covered by insurance in your state. Each IVF cycle can easily cost over $10K and that's without a 3rd person involved, which raises the expenses. Even if you have coverage, it covers only your part (ovary stimulation and egg retrieval) and your husband's part (fertilizing the ovaries with his semen) and development of the embryos. You still have to pay out of pocket for your carrier's embryo transfer and her fertility drugs, which can cost hundreds if not a few thousand dollars. Your carrier's health insurance should cover pregnancy expenses and delivery.

If you don't already have a person in mind, compensation of a carrier is generally around $20K, more for twins or higher order multiples, more for a c-section, etc. You can also expect to pay thousands in legal fees as you will need to pay for attorneys for both your/your husband and your carrier, and the agency gets a hefty fee for coordinating all of this. You have to meet with psychologists and social workers, and your carrier has to have her own medical screening and also be cleared by a psychologist and social worker.

Add to that...Nebraska law doesn't recognize or enforce surrogacy contracts so that complicates things and doubly ensures your need to have excellent legal help.

All that said, talk to your OB about the possibility of carrying again. I know that it's scary, but my mom had a cerclage placed with me because she lost the pregnancy before me at 24 weeks due to IC (she had no issues with my older sister). It was placed early and she carried not only me, but my later my two younger brothers and younger sister to full term. Now that it's a known issue, they may be able to place the cerclage very early and prevent you from having the bed rest and pramature delivery. Surrogacy is usually good for women who have a deformed uterus, no uterus or other issue that means that they have never been able to carry a pregnancy and never will. In your case, your doc may be able to provide an assessment of whether or not it's the right choice for you.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from St. Louis on

I would check with your local ob/gyn first. If you lived closer to me I would be more than happy to help you out. I have told my ob/gyn that I would be more than willing to help local families out with this. I know that it would be hard, but I also know I would be giving a family something so special.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Washington DC on

First and foremost ... talk to an attorney about the laws regarding surrogacy and rights to any children born that way in your state. Surrogacy can be an awesome experience or a complete nightmare and knowing the laws in your state is the first place to start.

Then talk to your OB for referals and to talk about options.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Cleveland on

I have seen this website in the past
good luck to you in your search!

1 mom found this helpful
For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions