How Do You Know What to Teach Your 3 Year Old Child

Updated on October 28, 2010
J.T. asks from East Northport, NY
23 answers

Hi Moms,

My daughter, who is going to be 3 in January, will be home with me for the next two years. Right now the plan is that she will not start pre-school until she is 4 1/2.

What I am trying to determine (and have no clue how to do so) is what I should be teaching her and how to do it. How can I tell what she is ready for? She knows the alpahbet (can say it and recognizes all the letters) and can always count to 10 (give her a pile of "X's" and she will count them), sometimes to all the way to 20.

Currently we read together all the time and do art projects almost every day. She also watches TV and plays with her kitchen / blocks / schoolhouse etc. while I am working (I work form home - approx 26 hrs / week). For socialization, we go to a weekly class at the library as well as Gymboree and a gymnastics class which is a separation class.

So anyway - I am pretty sure I have managed to cover the bases with eveyrthing else (just please don't ask me about house cleaning ;))- it is just the teaching part that gets me. I don't know how to tell what she is ready for... I want her to learn, but I don't want to push her before she is ready. Also - I know there are a lot of web sites out there that I can down load "lessons" etc. from, but again I don't know how to tell what she is ready for...

Sorry for the long question - I just wanted to give a full picture of what her days are like so you wonderful Moms could help me...

Thanks so much!

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

Featured Answers

T.M.

answers from Bakersfield on

Talk to her all the time. Explain to her everything you are doing and why you are doing it. "Look at mommy's dirty pan, food is stuck on it, I have to soak it in hot water so it will soften and come off". Let her feel it, then show her the result after soaking. Something like that is "magical" to a kid.
Think like a 3 year old, she needs to know everything and is ready to start absorbing. Everything you do is a teaching tool. Just analyze things that you normally take for granted and explain them to her. It's much easier than it seems. You dont need online classes or a work book. All the tools you need are right in front of you.

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.F.

answers from Philadelphia on

Go to the store and buy a preschool workbook, or go online and search for free preschool work sheets that will point you in the right direction.

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B.F.

answers from Chicago on

I didn't "teach" my boys anything at home, but I always talked to them. I explained what I was doing and why. They observed and sometimes "helped" when I was cooking, sorting laundry, etc. When the opportunity arose I pointed out colors, shapes, etc. and we played board games almost every day.
I also made sure they learned how to use cutlery, say thank you when they got a gift, greet people properly, waiting their turn, listening to and follow instructions and other important everyday skills. Listening skills and learning to wait their turn were probably the skills that helped them most when they entered school.
It seems you are doing a lot and I don't think that any structured teaching is needed at her age.

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.C.

answers from New York on

I think it sounds like you're doing all the right things for her now and you've already received a lot of good ideas from other moms. One thing I can suggest is have a "circle time" in the morning: tell her what day of the week it is, the month, the date...have her look out the window and tell you what the weather is like. At my son's preschool, they have construction paper cut-outs for the weather (raindrop, cloud, sun) and the "helper" of the day has to stick the correct weather symbol to the calendar.

I firmly believe that as preschoolers, daily life IS their school. As long as she isn't plopped in front of the tv all day watching Jerry Springer, she is sure to learn something each day whether you're "teaching" her or not.

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.D.

answers from Las Vegas on

Your daughter will learn so much just by you talking to her and getting her out to the park or on playdates. If you want, you can choose a letter of the day, number of the day, shape of the day and color of the day, and spend the entire day looking for all of those particular items in your everyday environment. Just make it fun and look for opportunities to point out what you happen to be focusing on that day and she'll be ready for kindergarten in not time. But do get her to the park and out on playdates as well. I know it is all fun and play but there are a lot of social skills, physical skills and science skills (gravity) to be learned out there while you are having fun.

All the best to you and your daughter.

1 mom found this helpful

V.W.

answers from Jacksonville on

If she is interested in reading on her own, then I agree with Stephanie's suggestion: Teach Your Child To Read in 100 Easy Lessons. I did it with our 2 kids. It was fantastic.

If she is NOT interested in reading (asking you how, "guessing" what words are in books and on signs when you are out in public, pretending to read things you know she can't, getting excited when she does recognize words on signs, etc) then don't push it.

You can work on basic math skills (since she knows her numbers) like adding things. One block plus one block is 2 blocks, etc.
But again, it ALL needs to be fun. Not drills or flashcard type stuff.

Talk to her about HOW things happen/work too. Not just facts (name of colors, letters, etc), but the "how". The plants need sunshine to give them energy for growing. Then they make seeds that fall to the ground (or get carried away by birds who have eaten berries and then poop, distributing the seeds elsewhere) and germinate. Starting the cycle all over again.

Explain how the car goes. That you have to put fuel (gas) into the tank for the car to be able to go. That pressing the gas pedal makes the fuel go into the engine where it burns producing the energy that makes the car go.
Use simple terminology and explanations that she can understand. Who cares if you don't know all the science behind it all... it will get her mind thinking about how and why things happen! She will let you know if you give her more information than she can process (she'll tune you out and change the subject or she'll ask more questions, sometimes more than you can answer properly!).

You can explain things like breathing. Take her to Walmart/Petsmart to look at the fish and explain how we breathe, then how fish breathe. Your body needs oxygen (part of the air) to function, and when you breathe in, your lungs grab those oxygen parts and send them to all the parts of your body that need it. In fish, they don't have lungs, they have gills. And their gills do for them, what our lungs do for us. :)

These, obviously, are just a few examples... but you can explain just about ANYTHING that catches her attention.

Everyday doesn't have to be a "lesson"... but there are mini-lessons built in to everyday stuff all around you.

I would definitely encourage her to spend time coloring, playing with play-doh and playing with small items (like stringing beads, etc). These things build the muscles and fine motor skills she will need when learning to write later on, and learning to tie shoes, etc.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B.C.

answers from New York on

Hi. Some suggestions things that I do with my daughter, who will be 2 and a half this November. Read to your daughter a lot. Ask her to spell the words and then ask what the word says. My daughter knew her alphabet long time ago, she can now quickly spell pretty much all the words, but she doesn't know how to read them all, but she reads some simple ones, like Moon, Jupiter, Star, Mommy, Cat, No, Yes, Dog etc. Reading does amazing things! Also, does she recognize number like 13, 16 etc even though she counts to 20? Keep counting, go to 30, then 40, then 50, that's what we do, then write for her a number, e.g. 13, and tell her it's 13, so she learns to recognize them. Another thing I do with my daughter is we count fingers. 2 plus 2 equals 4, 5 plus 5 equals 10 etc. Good luck!!!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

E.C.

answers from New York on

Doing great! Don't worry about getting in to worksheets or workbooks, or websites. The best things for her are seeing you love learning - catch you reading, thinking, looking words up in the dictionary, on wikipedia, (Heilbrunn Art History Timeline is fantastic for art and history combined). Read, read, read to her. It is great for her attention span, language. Speak to her as an adult and simply explain big words. Kids love hearing books read aloud that are 'beyond' their ability. And think about the illustrations - those are forming her senses of beauty. Lastly, music and books on CD (LibriVox recordings of tons of books - free audio downloads). This can keep you away from tv - which is just rotten for their senses and attention span. I got the girls BBC's Planet Earth and Blue Planet - dozens of hours of excellent footage and reporting - so at least she is feasting on beauty and hearing beautiful music and language.

B.A.

answers from Saginaw on

It sounds as though, you do have everything covered. For now I would just keep up with that. Next year when she turns for...you can work with writing the letters and counting up to 20. But really it sounds as though you are right path already.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.B.

answers from Rochester on

I agree with what several of the other moms have already suggested and have received some great ideas for my self as well. I have a 2.5 year old who is home with me 3 of the 5 workdays and of course weekends. We don't really have any "structured" learning time but I continually teach him things as they come up during the day. For example: we count various things during the day- like the number of cups we are putting in/out of the dishwasher, the number of stairs to the basement, the number of busses we see in the morning, etc. He helps his dad fix things and probally already knows more tools than I do :) I let him smell and taste differnet spices when we cook, and point out various colors and shapes throught out the day. I do like the mom's idea of "circle time" in the morning to review the day of the week, weather, etc...and may start including that into our morning.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.D.

answers from New York on

Dear J., Mommy, it sounds like you are doing a great job already! You don't want to burn her out.... let her have some fun until it is time for school.. Grandma Mary

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.J.

answers from Dallas on

at three, playing is their lesson. Check out the NAEYC website and look at developmentally appropriate programming (DAP). It shows how different work centers, free play and incorporating thematic "lessons" are vital to instruction and learning for children at your daughter's age.
I have a three year old, too, and he is in a classroom setting and has blossomed with them using this technique/approach to learning.
I also have seen that being engaged by asking them questions and listening to their answers, exposure to a lot of interesting places (even the pet store) helps engage and offer learning experiences, reading (a lot of reading), alphabet fun and counting are things he has learned. Some minor computer work that reinforces counting and colors is also done.
Have fun and best of luck!!

S.H.

answers from New York on

Check out Games for learning and Games for reading by Peggy Kaye . These books are pretty amazing.

S.B.

answers from Topeka on

First I would buy the book How To Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons. This is something you guys can do daily and it only takes about 20 minutes each lesson. When you have reached lesson 100, she will know how to read at a 2nd grade or higher level. I taught my kids to read with this and they are off the charts for their grade level at school.. per testing.

There are plenty of workbooks out there for preschoolers. I suggest looking at Walmart or your local bookstore for them. This is a simple and inexpensive way for them to learn needed skills.

Good Luck!

M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

I work full-time and my youngest is in a home daycare where she teaches them pre-school things, but I also work with all of my kids on EVERYTHING. I think at their ages (7, 5, and 3) everything is a learning experience. Even this morning, after I dropped the 7 and 5 year old at my mom's house to catch the bus, the 3 year old asked me how to get to daycare. I told him he had to tell me right or left at each turn. And he got it right!! Sometimes I was in the middle of the turn because I could not cause an accident to teach him, but he still had the right idea. It sounds like you are going GREAT already though!!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.R.

answers from Columbus on

You are doing everything that needs to be done. You read to her, you talk to her, you let her play, and you take her to play with other children. There is nothing else she needs. You will not advance her any further than she will be advanced otherwise if you just offer an enriched environment. Stop stressing about it, because she will learn just fine without anything formal, not even preschool. You cannot make a mistake (other than putting her in a deprived environment) and you are not responsible if she turns out to be a genius, she will be a genius if she is going to be, so you do not have to feel guilty either way. Relax, enjoy being a preschoolers Mom so that your daughter enjoys being a preschooler too.

M.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.C.

answers from New York on

Hi! My son didn't go to school until 4 also, so as I read your post, I was getting flashbacks. Everything you are doing is fine! I also would go to barnes and noble and look for activity books that are age appropriate and give him 2 pages a day. Maybe 3 if he was up for it. And I only gave it to him 4 days a week to not overwhelm him.

I also recommend the activity Brain Quest. It's sold at barnes and
noble. We did them every night before bed and on car or plane trips. Again, just a couple of pages. He loved them and it really broadened his mind.

Now he's in the second grade. I miss that time with him. I applaud you, you can't get that time with them back, they grow up so fast. Enjoy and lots of luck and love!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.F.

answers from New York on

Sounds like a great start! Now that she knows her letters, give her a book or a newspaper and ask her to find a letter on a page or in a headline. Have her look all around for letters in signs. Does she know prepositions? Give her little commands like put the block on the chair, or under the chair. Sort things, see if she can put all the yellow blocks together, or all the square things together. Research shows that children learn well through songs, so sing songs like Bingo or Head and Shoulders Knees and Toes. If you do art projects together, maybe you could write your own books. For example, go out and collect leaves, then come home and have her tell you where you went and what you saw, how you felt. You write one sentence per page and she can illustrate it. You can iron the leaves in wax paper (put a cloth between the wax paper and the ironing board and another cloth between the wax paper and the iron!) and tape them to the pages. Staple the pages together or tie them with string. Listen to her too and see if she has any questions that can turn into a science activity or a trip to the library to find out more. Have fun!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.C.

answers from New York on

I have not read any answers so if this if repetitive I'm sorry but there are state "frameworks" Google "-name of your state- infant/toddler frameworks" sounds like u r doing great! There is a lot of good lesson books at the family Christian book store too!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

N.D.

answers from New York on

Perhaps you can get in touch with the kindergarten teacher in your district and find out what they teach and what the child is expected to know BEFORE they get to kindergarten. You dont want to teach her too much and have her be bored when she gets to school. Better to just teach her about life, nature etc and answer any questions she asks. And above all ENJOY her baby years, they will never come again.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Play is a child's "job"! Let her play.
Pick up a Nursery school or pre-school level workbook/activity book.
Let her try that from time to time.
Read to her ALL the time. Sing in the car. Count things while you're out and about.
I think lots of moms wonder if they are "teaching enough" but the simple fact is that kids all tend to level out in Kindergarten and all get up to speed pretty quickly. Don't pressure yourself too much. If she's not having fun--it's not worth doing.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.H.

answers from New York on

I think it depends on your child. Some kids really enjoy having written work to do and some don't. I home schooled both of my kids at 3 and 4 and my son loved the hands on stuff but hated writing and work books. Daughter on the other hand doesn't feel she has done work unless she has something to show her daddy when he gets home. Science is great at this age and both of my kids ( now 10 and 6) LOVE science. When they were 3 we did the basic stuff. Baking soda and vinegar mixed together to make the volcano, telephone made from string and cups, tornado in a bottle etc. It's fun, fast and they are learning. The main thing to remember is that you want her to learn and have fun so don't push her past where she is comfortable. There is a great FREE site for pre school here http://www.first-school.ws/INDEX.HTM Good luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.T.

answers from New York on

You don't really need to do a lot of teaching, when she will go to preschool. You don't need to do lessons. Read to and with her a lot. Point out letters and numbers, count things in your normal daily life. She does not need to count past 20. Kids start preschool not recognizing all the upper and lowercase letters. Be sure to take her on playdates or to classes like storytime at the library, gymboree/little gym - something that gets her used to sitting for 10 minutes at a time, waiting her turn. She needs to be independent in the bathroom and be able to get into and out of her coat and boots on her own. Teach her to follow 3 step directions as she gets a little older and follow a routine each morning, those are the things that really are needed for when she goes to school
Good luck!

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions