Dear K.,
To medicate is a difficult decision sometimes. I believe that there are times and seasons. I was teaching third grade a few years back and had a boy that had a severe ADHD problem. It was HEART BREAKING to see him not be able to play normally and socialize normally with the other kids. He was bright, and personable but completely out of control. The other kids liked him, but not to play with. When he was on meds, he was able to focus and interact in the classroom.
The first thing to do whether you medicate or not, is to make sure that your child has a strict nutritional diet. Nutrition, proper excercise and sufficient sleep are the first line of defense and will assist any medications. Talk to your doctor about a medication plan. There are many different medications and doses and one size DOES NOT fit all.
The next and most important thing is to talk to your child about the situation. There a hundreds of famous and highly successful people that have suffered with ADD and ADHD. It has been a struggle for intelligent successful people throughout history. The child has to understand what they are dealing with. It is not all healthy habits and meds. The child needs to understand that there is extra effort on their part to cooperate with the plan and work with their teacher. If the student doesn't care, nothing will work as well.
As a teacher I can tell you that the few days during the year that all my ADHD kids 'happened' to be sick on the same day, we had our entire days work done by 1:30 and were able to enjoy a spontanious afternoon of art and games. With the other students disrupting the class we struggled to finish the day's work on time.
Parents need to realize that not dealing with the problem is robbing the entire class of their education. There are some wonderful books to better understand the nutrition, various medications and counseling programs that can bring a bit more sanity into your child's life.
The counseling and mentoring that you give your child is not just for today, but for a life time of learning to work with there situation and better function in society.
Joan