How Do I Stop My 9 Month Old from Being Rough and Pulling My Hair?

Just a little something I have done with my three when they were small. I would look at him/her in the eyes and sadly say oweeee. Then I would make a sad face and kind of pretend to cry and look away,or put him down. It really made a difference with my little darlings. Just another thing to try. Good luck!

My granddaughter was the same way. Her mom started taking her hand and rubbing gently on her face and introducing the word "nice." anytime the baby starts to get rough, mom takes her hand and gently rubs her face saying nice and the baby understands to be nice. It's simple and it worked!

keep your hair in a pony tail. Trying to ignore it would have worked best.

Try giving it back to her...not as rough but letting her know it does hurt. Nip it now or it only gets worse.

M.

My daughter also started doing this around the same time, and would laugh when I said ouch or no :) I started saying no very sternly one time, and if she does it again, I flick her hand. It startles her and makes her realize that I am serious and also what no means. Be prepared for crying from hurt feelings, but you need to be able to get the point across to her!
Hope this helps,
A.

Hi, all the previous responses were great. I don't have much to add except that this was about the time we started teaching our daughter sign language. I would tell her in a very soft, calm voice "gentle" and rubbed her hand/wrist (from hand to mid-forearm). It took a little while to catch on, but she doesn't pull my hair or my earrings anymore. Hope this helps.

Hi B.,

I have been raising children for 26 years and I can tell you that all 6 of them went through this! They will grow out of it and the best advise you have been given is to gently say "no" and give her something she can play with. PLEASE do not follow any advice to "flick" or do anything else that will inflict pain on your baby. Sure, it will probably work but it will also teach her that it is ok for the big one to hurt the little one. They are totally incapble of understanding any kind of reasoning at this point so just know that she will learn with gentle teaching without infliction of any kind of pain.

L.

Hi, both of my kids went through this stage. What I did was said no very sternly and put them down immediately. It only took them a few times to realize that if they pulled my hair, or scratched at my face, it meant no more being held. They still occasionally would do it to see if they would get the same reaction, but if you are consistent, it usually works. I have two very strong willed children and they both got it pretty quick. My daughter is almost two, and I still use the technique for her when she is being too rough. Now that she is older, I use more words to explain why she was put down, and I make her go longer before picking her back up, but it still works. With young ones it works really well since it is a major distraction being put down, they often cry, then forget what they were doing before being put down anyways, so less likely to do it again right away. The most important thing is that you never laugh or make it seem like a game, or else she will keep doing it trying to get that same reaction again. It is just her exploring her new found skills and practicing cause and effect, so make sure you give her lots of ok ways to do this, and this too shall pass. Good luck.

Good day B. B, well the best advise for you is to be the mom every child from 6months to 9 or even older will test the waters. It is funny to them also this is their first point of challenge you. If you allow this to go further without any discipline and couching that your Mom put you in front of the the 9month baby you just might have to tap her hands and strongly stand with NO! it might hurt your feeling but this will save you some further headache. at a tender age which she needs you to let her know whats right and wrong this is a test and you must pass for her and yourself. Your the Mom. This is their informative years she needs you for this. You are not her friend you are her Mom and she needs her MoM......

My daughter had a similar problem with pulling on my hair. try to put your hair back when you hold her and when she pulls on your hair and scratches at you don't let any emotion come over you just put her down. Eventually she will get bored with it and move on to something else. She thinks its funny so if you don't give her any emotion, like you don't mind or care then she will get bored. It worked for me. Just remember not to feel bad like you are neglecting her cause you are not. You love her.

M.

I did this with all 3 of my kids...grab her hand and firmly tell her no then turn her hand around and with the back of her hand stroke your cheek slowly and softly and say"niiiiiiiiice" (nice) then do it to her with your own hand so she see how "soft" and "nice" feels. This way, her nails are away from your face and she can't pinch or scratch. Eventually, when she gets older, teach her to do it with her fingertips. And show that when she does "nice" you smile and relax your shoulders. It's like a bonding thing too! I learned with my kids, any reaction will trigger them to want to do it again. The best thing is to try to stay as calm as possible( i know that will be hard when she's yanking your hair) and teach her the "nice" method.
:0)
Good Luck!

when your holding her & she starts being rough put her down, eventualy she'll learn if she's rough with you, you wont want to pick her up..this is what my huspand has suggested..my stephen plays rough w/ him too lol so he would know, n when i want him to calm down i tell him i'll hold him if he quiets down, n it took some trys but it eventualy worked. your friend, P. E. R.

Hi there. My daughter went through this too. Repetition is the key, at least it was in my experience. Every time she pulled or scratched I would over-act my sad and hurt face. Lots of "OW, OW, OW!" and then I would show her how I wanted to be touched on her hair and face and then with her hand on my hair and face. The whole time saying "nice" or "easy". It took a few months but now she says "nice" while patting my hair or face. Hope this helps.

We had this problem with our son. It was explained to us by the professionals in our parenting group that all babies test their parents at this age. Since babies are narcissistic, they aren't born with the value not to be cruel, so we have to teach it. Many babies will pull a cat's tail or pull on the dog's fur, or bite a nipple, they all do it. We found ourselves getting laughed at, too and it was really frustrating. We did this, as soon as the glasses were pulled off or our faces slapped, pinched, we would look at Miles sternly in the face and say, "OUCH. That is NOT okay." If he laughed, we would take his cheeks firmly between our fingers and thumb to let him know that we meant business, (but with our emotions under control)and say, "NOT OKAY", pulling hair NOT OKAY." His face would crumple and that was a good sign that he was getting it, but sometimes he would still smile and that is the tricky test. We never raised our voices or overreacted, we just kept giving him the same mirror that this behavior is unacceptable.
In order to teach a child it is never okay to harm another, you must get them to see that it will never be okay with you. They have to believe you, and when they finally do fold at your fierce expression of seriousness, you can say something like "I know, you are learning" or "I know dear, I know". And give her a little empathy after she has gotten the message. If you give her this response every time she tests that boundary, she will stop. If she repeats the behavior, maybe you could hold off on the empathy and make sure she gets it.
Welcome to the discipline stage! It has been the most challenging thing for me as a mom. It is much easier to bend, but my son doesn't do well with that. He likes to know where we stand on everything, and we feel that he gets his values and part of his identity (one aspect of which is kind, gentle toddler) when we guide him consistently about the important stuff.
Good luck to you, dear.

My son does the same thing. My advice, CUT YOUR HAIR!
I did and if it is shorter it is less sensitive.

Hi B..
I think most babies go through this stage. I have two kids and I would loosen their hands from my hair and tell them firmly "owe that hurts mommy" and put them down. Now this worked pretty quick for my daughter, but my son is very strong-willed and when the telling and putting down didn't work I would pull his hair back so he would understand that it hurts. Scratching, the same thing say, "owe that hurts" and put them down. When she laughs at you, say, "no, it's not funny- it hurts". It's important that you stay firm and stand you ground. She'll get it. Babies are pretty quick learners for the most part.

Good luck!

First of all, she is just playing! She likes the reaction she gets from you and at this age she is very curious about touching everything and the sounds that come from those things she touches. Including you! What I would do is first, tie back your hair so she can't pull it. Second, when she goes to grab at your face, give her a toy or something that she can squeeze. Just continue to give her an alternate plaything that is OK for her to pinch, squeeze, or scratch (toys with lots of textures work well), and eventually she will learn.

Also, when she goes to grab or pinch you, hold her hands very tightly, and say sternly, but not gruffly, "No," and then immediately give her an alternate toy. Say things like, "We can squeeze pillows" or "We can hit drums" or "Let's shake this rattle." This will teach her what is appropriate or not. Do NOT let her beat up on you. She needs to know that you will not tolerate this! Good luck, and enjoy this time with your baby!