How Do I Make Her Stop Running Away????

I think a lot of toddlers play this one at least for a little while.
When my son was going through it, it was a matter of where we were.
In the park, we could play.
In the mall, in a store, at a fair - I was afraid I'd lose him so I used a leash and harness.

you're going to have to carry her in a parking lot. There's no way I'd trust a toddler to walk in a parking lot.
And like the others said stop playing the game.

This is when I did 2 things:

1- I instituted a "counting" rule. Counting meant I was serious. After all, how could my son know why *sometimes* it was hilarious and we had time to put our socks on our noses and be elephants, and other times we had to be in the car 10 minutes ago. So when I was serious, I would count to 5, and the deal was I would NOT get angry until I got to 5... which gave him time to collect himself. The rest of the time, he was free to be silly, or quick, or what have you.

2- I "trained" him to come when I whistled. We made it a game. Run as fast as you can until I whistle and come back and touch my legs. Okay, go! Whistle, run back. Okay go! Then it became the rule... I whistle and you have to run to me. I can whistle a LOT louder than I can yell... and it keeps me from being "monster mom" shouting at my son at the top of my voice over hill and dale.

My granddaughter was actually taught by her daddy to run away, because he liked to chase her when he came to pick her up. Well, this granny doesn't run. She wore a leash from the time she was 18mo. until she was 6. She LOVED it! She hated holding hands, and she hated being carried, so she had to wear the leash to walk. You don't have to worry about them wandering off in a store, or at the zoo, or the fair, they can't get too far ahead of you, and no one can snatch them when you look away for a second. I kept 2 in the car, and she got to pick which color,and which hand (velcro strap), and she never got out of the car before putting it on. (Anyone who commented about treating her "like a dog" was told, "You leash your dog to keep him safe, why wouldn't I do the same for my precious baby?") In the house, it's time for please and thank you, and instant praise for doing anything right . Sometimes we forget to praise the good behavior because we expect it, we only correct the bad. The more you appreciate every little thing she does right, the more she'll want to please you to earn that praise. In the mean time, when you want her to do something, walk up to her, take her hand, and start praising the heck out of her for doing whatever it is as you walk her through it. She'll learn that running isn't an option anymore, and you LOVE it when she does something right! The most important part of all this is to make it more fun to do it your way. It won't take her long.

Gee I wish I could whistle... like Riley. I CANNOT whistle at all. No matter what method! LOL

Anyway, my son was like that at that age. They do not have any fully developed "impulse control" whatsoever at that age.
My son almost ran into a car... as he whizzed into a parking lot... while LAUGHING and looking back at me... and so rascal he is. And he is SOOO fast as lightning... super fast runner.... not even I can keep up with him. And I used to run track.

Anyway, for crowded areas/venues, I used a Toddler leash on my Son. Yah.. not real popular... but it worked. I told him it is only for crowded areas. For safety. He had no problem with it. He liked it and even liked to wear it.
I tried ALL kinds of ways to curtail his running away. To no avail.
But he grew out of that phase... quickly.
Then I had no need for the monkey toddler leash, which I got from Amazon.

The thing is... I rather use that monkey toddler leash.. than have had my Son hit by a car. In fact.. MANY people young and old... complimented me on it... and then they would tell me about their own personal stories... about how a Grandson or niece, actually got HIT by a car... and one Grandpa told me.. his grandson died...by running out into their street. He said... HE would have done the same as me... to prevent it. If he only knew.

all the best,
Susan

Hi H. :-)

What I am hearing and reading is that it seems you "announce" your intention and "then" she decides to run, like a game. So perhaps consider next time when you are ready to change her diaper, just walking up to her and taking her hand gently and walking her over to the changing table, or wherever it is you clean her. Also do the same thing with the meal... just prepare it and allow her to do what she normally does.. don't announce that it is time.. just when it IS time.. go and get her and put her in her chair.

You might then, at a later date.. CREATE the game and name it.. now it's time to play "come and get me mommy"!.. something like that and THEN let her run and you chase.. let her have a new association.

hugs,
A. R.N., Energy Medicine Practitioner

You can discipline her if you want her to stop. "No running" then firm consequence on second warning consistently until she understands. It will only be a couple of times, they're very quick at that age and not trying to rebel (you're getting into the 2 zone though, so best to nip it now). You can also teach her to come when you call her the same way. People "Ooh and ahhh" at us when we call our 18 month old and she comes. It's just a little training up front to save major headaches later. My older two were never allowed to run away either, it was usually me out alone with them on errands, so I couldn't have that happening.

Whenever possible, Don't chase her. Don't be brought into the game, wait for her to come back and use whatever form of punishment you use on her and do it immediately. This will be highly inconvienint for a while but it shouldn't take long before the game is no longer fun.

Stop playing the game. Next time she runs, turn around and go the other direction. When out in the world, tell her, if you run, we will have to leave. End of story. When she sees you going the other direction, she should quickly chase after you.

Stop chasing her and she will stop running. Let her run around with a dirty diaper. She will eat when she is hungry. The best thing you can do is to NOT ENGAGE in behavior you do not approve.

I read a few responses but not all but I have to agree, this was never an issue for my kids until Alex came along. Alex is a bit special needs and for his safety and my peace of mind until he got a little older we used a safety harness/ leash. I will be the first to admit that people can make terrible comments, but so much better to deal with a few peoples ignorance than have to face a child who has been hit by a car...I used it at the airport and some other places, but not to places like walmart where I could carry him a short distance and use a cart. They have so many different models now and they can be found easily, walmart even carries some in the baby aisle.
Little ones think it is a game, so do not chase when in the home. I have found that giving Alex cues as to when we are going to transition helps a lot, praising him, and also asking him to help me...it is almost lunch time, will you put the napkins on the table? The younger you get them involved the better. Also and I know this sounds silly, but I still tell Alex at age 3 " I need a hand!" and he will usually walk nice rather than being carried ( win win!)

i have a harness for my 2 1/2 yr old to keep him out of traffic but he is hard of hearing and he cant wonder away in the store and not hear me call him back. as far as the running at dinner obviously she isnt hungry and doesnt get it this will break her quick.. this is a game you have to play to a degree its an age thing but make an acceptable time to do it. we play chase with my son alot and let him run away so he can do what is natural but not at diaper time

My daughter did this and drove me nuts. I remember chasing her around with a dirty bottom and me getting crazier trying to prevent her from messing up stuff. I did not have a sense of humor about it!! Yelling and chasing just played into her hands. I agree with the advice not to play her game. At home, try to play a different game. My daughter is 4 so this may not work for you yet, but we play "who's gonna win?" Race her to the dinner table, race her to get the diaper, race her to put on the seat belt, etc...let her win of course. In a parking lot, you're going to have to hold on to her. I wouldn't trust a 20 mo outside even if she didn't run away.

They are fast aren't they?
Well I don't announce what we are about to do, like Amy F said, and it works most of the time. On the occasion she figures out we are going in the bedroom for a diaper change, I firmly state "Come to mommy, or you get a time out." She usually thinks about it for a few seconds then comes to me. =)
Sorry but I can't leave my baby in a dirty diaper, so I can't just not chase her and leave her poopy. Not announcing, and/or firm consequences works for us. Good Luck! =)

Give her 2 options, she can either walk holding your hand of you will carry her. No budging.

Mine has this same problem - and she does it whether I play the game or not, and turning around and walking in the other direction, means she is further from me - it doesn't make her stop at all! I really have no solution other than, don't tell her its diaper change time, just grab her when she is near - that is what I do.
when I am out, she has to hold my hand or have her harness on at all time, coz she will run off while we are out. no amount of punishment, or telling her the nasty man will get her works, she really does not care. I have walked around the corner and watched her, she just plays, its a horrible habit!