How Do I Get My 22 Month Old to STOP the Binky/Pacifier?

Updated on April 25, 2009
L.D. asks from Sterling, VA
12 answers

Is there any advise on how I can get my (almost 2 yr old) daughter to end the binky? She is very attached to it.

1 mom found this helpful

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B.P.

answers from Washington DC on

You've gotten some great suggestions! I have no real advice, just encouragement. We had to do it cold turkey for my daughter (she was chewing them and tearing them--a choking hazard). And she was VERY attached to it for sleeping. The first nap without it was AWFUL! I didn't think we'd make it. But that was it. That night and every nap or night since has been totally fine. (Of course, when she did so well without it we made a big deal about what a big girl she was, told everyone, etc.) I was shocked at how easy it was. It just might not be as bad as you think! Take some of the great advice from the other ladies and good luck!
B.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.D.

answers from Washington DC on

Hi L.,
For my first son, The Binky Fairy came. He would put 1 binky a night in a special box and the Binky Fairy left him a "Big Boy" toy.
For my second son, our neighbors just has a baby and I told him we had to pass the binkies on to the next baby since he was turning into a big boy now. We boxed them up. He colored on the box and then presented them to the new mommy next door. She waited a few days to make sure my son was ok without them and then she pitched them. She then bought identical binkies so if he saw them he would recongnize them.
Both times it worked out perfect. Each son missed them for the first night a little but it was done.

Good Luck!!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.A.

answers from Washington DC on

my son is 18 months right now, and a few months ago we limited the binky to only in the crib and car. He never even thinks about them during the day anymore. My husband doesn't even give it to him in the car anymore either. So it's mostly just for bed. In the morning or when he wakes up from his naps, he's usually standing in the crib with his binky in his mouth. We tell him to put the binky back in the bed since that's where binkies go. He loves to be congratulated on doing the right thing, and he is usually quite good about it. Then we pick him out of the crib, and leave the room to play elsewhere. He associates binkies with bedtime now. Not sure how we're going to take the next step to cut them out all together, but we're not worried about that yet. He likes his binky very much and when he is especially tired it can help him focus on calming down rather than crying because he's exhausted.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.C.

answers from Washington DC on

Cut the tip or poke a hole through it. It doesn't suck the same. Then you can tell your child they are broken and you have to throw them away. This worked for both of my nieces and several of my friends' kids. My daughter is 19 months and only uses her pacifier during sleep time. I am not in a rush to take if from her, but she also loves her baby doll so that will help with the transition. Good luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.S.

answers from Washington DC on

My oldest son had been down to using it only at nap/bedtime until his baby brother was born. Then, he started using it almost all the time. We eventually struck a deal that he would trade them for a toy he really wanted (it was a hot day & he'd been wanting a sprinkler). We went to Toys-R-Us and he chose a sprinkler & paid the cashier with his "nonnies". She, of course, looked very confused-I just told her to put them in a little bag out of his sight. He NEVER asked for them again & as a matter of fact, we found the bag of petrified "nonnies" when we moved from our house a couple years later-yuck! This worked really well for him. Good luck to you.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.B.

answers from Norfolk on

Hey L.,
You have gotten some great advice. I cannot remember how we got my son off of his, only that he was older than my parents and others would have liked for him to still have them.
My opinion is that you need to feel out your child's needs for the pacifier and then decide where to go from there. My son never attached himself to any blanket or stuffed animal, and had regressed due to a vaccination shot, so for him the pacifier was more of a comfort than anything else. It would be more difficult to take the pacifier away from him than for a child that has other comforting tools.

My way of dealing with my son may be different from others but I have made it a point not to lie to my son about most things. I am honest with him and I think he appreciates it. Children are not as dumb as we think. You can just tell your daughter that you want to see if she can go without the binky for a little while. Tell her your reasons for wanting the binky to go bye bye (you miss seeing her smile, she has learned to sooth herself etc..) Do it in small increments of time. Say to her "let's put the binky away until such and such a time...find a special place to put it." and then let her put it there and pick a time or activity to give it back. Let her be as involved as possible in making the decisions on this. Let her decide where to put it and the activity time to get it back. You may find that because she knows she will get it back she won't stress as much as if you were to take it away for good and may even forget about it when the time comes to get it back. If she is really attached to it then it will take a bit longer. But let her feel like she is in charge of the change because she is the one that has to go through the emotions of not having it.

I just have a question for you about this...
Are you trying to get her to stop using the binky because you want her to, is someone making you feel like you have to or is there a good reason for it such as a medical or safety reason. If you are wanting the change for her because you feel it is time then trust your instincts and feel your way through this. YOu will know if she is truly ready and you can make the transition less stressful for her by giving her choices and involving her in the process.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.F.

answers from Washington DC on

I think that Anne's suggestion is a very good one. My 18 month old is also very attached to her binky, and uses it a lot to self-soothe. I have started by just restricting her binky to the crib, so she can use it to self-soothe during naps/overnight, but not during the day. I've kept her VERY busy to keep her from focusing on the absence of binkies. In the car is difficult, and I will admit that my DH and I have gone back to letting her have it from time to time in exchange for not listening to her scream for 45 minutes. I try to limit it in the car to longer car rides.

All in all, I've come to terms with letting her have it awhile longer. I think when the time comes that I feel she no longer needs it, I will do the cold-turkey thing, like I did with my son at 10 mos. In the grand scheme of things, recent research indicates letting a child have a binky up to age 4 will not damage their teeth, and I figure at least she's not walking around town with a binky in her mouth. I was MUCH more concerned/judgmental about it when I was a first time mom, but after having two (and another on the way) I've learned it's not so bad to let some of these things go. ;) But as you asked for advice, my advice is to "feel" her out by first trying to restict binkies to the crib/bed for a few days and see how that plays out. It may be hard the first few, but after that you may be surprised. And if she still needs it to soothe herself at night, or during naps, don't beat yourself up. And my final advice -- don't listen to your mother. ;-) If she's anything like MY mother she's already telling you that you've ruined her life by not taking away the binkie! LOL!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.W.

answers from Washington DC on

I am not very good at this, but my sister in law's friend is a speech therapist and when she watched my nephew for the day she just put them all in a truck, told him to say bye bye and rolled them out the door to the other babies that need them. He cried for a few minutes and then he was done. When they get older, it gets harder and more expensive. I took my daughter to build a bear, put it inside a bear, and then the binky fairy left her a gift that night. I am going to try the truck thing with my son soon. He is getting through some sleep issues or we would have done it sooner. good luck.

N.L.

answers from Washington DC on

There isn't going to be an easy way to get your child to stop using the pacifier because she has been using it for way too long. However, nothing is impossible with God. This will just take perseverance on your part. Here are my recommendations.

My recommendation for parents who need to ease their children into changes:
1st: You have to stop calling the pacifier a binky. Your daughter is old enough to use the proper names for things and to understand that a pacifier is only for little babies.
2nd: Let her know that she will soon not be using a pacifier anymore because she can find other ways to soothe herself.
3rd: Restrict the pacifier to bedtime only and then stop bedtime use after about a week.
4th: Never mention the word binky again or pacifier as it relates to her.

My recommendation for parents who like to "get it done"
1st: Tell your child that she will no longer be using the pacifier since she is a big girl.
2nd: Take all of the pacifiers from her and never, never, never, give them back to her again. She will cry, pout, scream, shout, lose some sleep, refuse to eat, etc. but she will get over it. She will NOT have emotional damage as a result... I know this for a fact.
3rd: DO NOT try to appease her by telling her that she will get something in its place as this will cause her to become dependent on something else.

The hard part about being a parent is preparing our children for the next stage of life. Your daughter will be better prepared for being an active participant in life if she is able to handle life without a crutch. Best wishes to you and I hope that whatever you try works.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.H.

answers from Washington DC on

I am sure you will receive a lot of responses to this one. My daugter is 2 1/2 and I took hers away around the same time you are. I just took it away and dealt with the fussing. I just told her the passy is for babies and she is no longer a baby. It isn't going to be easy. It's just something you have to do. Good Luck
S.H

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

E.B.

answers from Washington DC on

Hi L.,
My daughter is also very attached her to Binky. She uses it mostly to sleep and sometimes in the car on long trips. Never during the day while playing or out and about. We tried taking it away when she was about 25 months with no luck. We went 4 weeks with NO binky at all--none in the house. Her naps became almost non existent, she had a hard time kicking a cold because she wasn't resting. She never asked for them, but we knew that she was a little off key. So, we basically decided that because we couldn't cut her thumb off if she was a thumb sucker that we would continue to restrict it but allow her to have it. She loves it so very much and it really does soothe her when she's tired. I'm waiting for her to decide when she doesn't need it anymore. I'm assuming it'll be when she drops her naps. Best of luck.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

R.D.

answers from Washington DC on

Very easy for me to say 'just take it away', but this is one of those things that if they don't give up on their own, you either have to do cold turkey or wean them from it. When my middle son was one, we only let him use it in the car and for bed, and then gradually took it away from the car and then got rid of them all together. He was probably 18 months (6 months past my goal) when he was done with them. We had only one rough night with him. Since she is almost 2, I would recommend just taking it away cold turkey and brace for some tears!

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions

Related Searches