How Do Day Care Providers Feel?

I run a Play Based preschool program. I am not into sitting 3 year olds down to do worksheets and rote learning and specific outcome art projects and crafts. We do MANY books, finger plays, songs, cooking and many many self help skills all day long (90% of the time my kids are potty trained at 24 mos now...no sippys, good silverware use, dressing well, etc..and ALOT of manners emphasis and sharing and social skills). I do work on ABC, colors, shapes and other concepts, but it is very fluid and child directed the bulk of the time. Its what I feel strongly about and what works for me.

This is NOT what all parents want. Then an original, not chain organized full day preschool opened up very close by and many of my clients started migrating over there. 10 of them in about 4 years. It hurt my business, but I understood, and business recovered just fine. Many parents are very result-driven and have a hard time seeing the beauty of play and allowing their small children to be nurtured and given the freedom of learning thru play without the contraints of success thru worksheets.

As you can see, I have my own strong opinions on Early Development. And thats whats great about free choice. I can choose to operate my business this way and parents can choose to bring their children to me or to a more structured place.

I would discuss with your current provider her philosophy on these matters. What does she do all day with the children? No activities?...or is there a purpose to her "nothingness"...or more going on than you see? I often need to explain the "nothingness" parents sometimes feel..then they do the lightbulb "ah ha" moments and have a better understanding of how it all flows and makes sense. As a parent you will likely have a specific ideal of what preschool learning you want for your child and there is nothing at all wrong with seeking that out!

I think doing both places would be hard on both of you. JMO

Personally, I have done back up/drop in care for quite a few families who have left my care (if I have the space , of course). Its fun to see them again...and the rest of the crew that might remember them loves having someone special here for a day. Mostly, I have never had an issue, but as I said, I don't hold any ill will against the families who left me. They had a different opinion for their childs early education. They are the parent and that is their choice!

Good luck!

I would definitely talk to her about it. If she doesnt have any kind of preschool now I wouldnt ask her to add this knowing you would probably switch your child anyways. I would be upfront with your desires and give a specific age you would want to start. Just make sure your clear so she doesnt try to fill this void and have you leave.
As a home daycare provider I would always accept back up care for any of my past children. Unless of course they left on bad terms. I love all my daycare children and enjoy seeing them even when they are grown.
If every thing is done openly, I dont see her getting mad or upset. Its when things are not clearly stated or misunderstood that starts the trouble.
Good luck and hope things work out well with you all!

I have been a daycare provider for 23 yrs. I have had children leave for a variety of reasons. A few have left, having had issues that they never talked to me about and that hurt. If a parent has an issue with something, such as wanting a preschool program when one is not offered, I feel the parent owes it to the provider to at least talk to her about it. If it is something the provider can change/add/do, chances are she will. We providers want to know if a parent is not 100% happy with something. How can we fix something we don't know is a problem? We would much rather make a small change to keep a current family (that we have a bond with and have made part of our family) than start over with someone new. Your provider can then say yes or no. Chances are your provider is doing more than you realize. Not seeing work sheets or paper projects coming home or on the wall does not mean she is not doing learning activities with the children. As NBinMN said, children learn A LOT through play and every day activities. A child does not need to be in a preschool classroom to get the benefits offered by a preschool program. I would have an honest discussion with your provider and see what she is doing that you might not know about. If that is still not enough, you can see if she is willing to do more. If not, at least you have had the open discussion and it won't come as a surprise to her if you leave. I would warn you, though, if you let her know too far ahead of time that you are going to leave, she may fill your spot - not because she is upset, but because an opportunity came up to fill your spot sooner than you were ready to leave. I would not try to do 2 part time programs, that would be difficult on everyone. As a provider, I have often provided back up care for families that have left. It is wonderful to see the children again, the parents again, and for the kids in my care to see their old friend. Good luck. I think we would all be interested in hearing your decision.
S.
mom of 3 and daycare provider

i think going between two providers would be very difficult- kids thrive on routine and it will be quite a bit different between the two care providers. I think you should mention what you want as your child gets older to your current care provider. Perhaps they can provide more structured learning, perhaps not. I think the important thing is to be open and upfront about your desires. If you end up leaving for this other place she won't be blind-sided and your relationship will be better. If she holds a grudge against you for removing your child, she doesn't sound very professional and I'm not sure I would want my kid going there anyway.

Good luck!

My mother had had her own inhome daycare for almost 30 yrs and has had this come up many times. Start talking about your desire, or your husbands desire for 'preschool curriculm' and do it casually like its matter of fact, dont tip toe around it, your not doing anything wrong. You can say, maybe when he's 2 and leave it at that. My mom would totally be the backup for anyone, probably better that you left the last sitter with that sort of attitude about it, doesnt seems like her focus was more on loosing that pay then on him. I dont think its fair to your son to be bouncing back and forth from 2 sitters if there isnt really any need for it. Be sure to give at least a months notice once you decide to leave to give the sitter time to replace that income.

I lost a family for this exact reason. The family put great emphasis on education & they wanted their son in preschool. I hold no animosity. Admittedly, I haven't seen them since they left, but would welcome them back or gladly talk if I saw them publicly. I also lost another family at that same time because Mom was pregnant with twins & wanted someone to come to their home. I was offered that job, but was pregnant myself. I have spoken to her & have seen her since then. No problems. It would seem to me that if this provider professional, she wouldn't have a problem. I can't offer any preschool learning, so it made perfect sense to me.