How Can I Help My 3 Year Old Overcome His Shyness About His Speech Problem?

My son started speech therapy at 2.5 years. He's now 4.5. Although he's made great improvement, he'll be in speech for a few more years. We're delaying kindergarten partly because of it (summer birthday). We want to give him another year of preschool (at the elementary school in the early childhood program) to help him. I noticed last year that he was starting to get shy at preschool... he didn't like his turn at show-and-tell and things like that. We've had behavioral issues due to speech... he never learned to 'use his words' with other children because they could never understand him. He would just hit/push them instead. Now he can be understood (most the time) but he still has to be reminded constantly to 'use his words'. I'm not sure what to tell you about helping him overcome it... I made sure my son had alot of one-on-one playdates with his best friends. As his speech has improved, his shyness has started to go away. If you continue to be very supportive and loving at home I'm sure he'll turn out fine emotionally. Do the exercises at home everyday so he improves faster... the sooner he improves enough so other kids understand him better, the sooner the shyness will probably go away. And remember, even great talkers are sometimes shy... it's not exactly a bad thing as long as it doesn't interfere with him having at one or two best friends and a somewhat 'normal' school experience. He's still plenty young and has alot of time to mature.

This is always a hard one to deal with. My youngest son lost his front teeth way before it was time to because he had very little enamel on his teeth. The teachers refused to acknowledge that this was why he could not pronounce some words clearly like the other kids. Other children would make fun of him as well. He finally got his two front teeth about a year ago or so and is ecstatic about it. His speech is so clear now. Before he was in a speech impaired class....which no amount of speech therapy was going to help him because he had no front teeth! His brother (my middle son) was a little tongue tied. Everyone said it was bad enough he needed his tongue clipped because they couldn't understand him when he talked. Even his grandmother couldn't understand him most of the time she said. It seemed as if only myself and his father were the only ones who could. It was frustrating for not only us, but for our children as well. They were both in speech therapy then. Each day they would come home with a story of someone making fun of them or teasing them and it would break our hearts. But we would take them in our arms and hug them tightly, kissing them on the head and telling them that it was ok because that kid didn't need to hear them then. Always encourage him to talk, no matter what other kids might say. Let him know that kids can be mean because when they don't understand something and they are afraid, they make fun of it. Tell him the other kids are too little to understand. As for how to deal with others who assume things...when they do, make it a point to show them the good qualities about your son, how he has overcome so much with the progress he has made, that he isn't slow at all but moving well beyond.

My little brother is 6 and is selectively mute. Which means he doesn't talk to anyone except family. His anxiety level gets to high in certain situations and he just doesn't speak. My mom had to actually go to the school and the teacher and tell them to explain to the class why he doesn't talk and how to treat him. She also has had the teacher explain to the class that if he does talk...don't point it out. Otherwise he will stop. Sometimes he forgets because he is caught up in the fun and he will say stuff. I know it took a few months for them to understand why she was pushing the issue so much...but now everyone understands why he doesn't speak, and they are accepting of him. If kids are told why someone is the way they are, then they are typically more understanding. I think honestly you need to get VERY involved with his teachers and principal. They need to understand why he has a speech prob and how they can help make it better. They also need to know that you aren't going to tolerate anyone treating your child inappropriately and the teachers and staff need to be that way as well. It may be a fight....but you have to stand up for your son and make sure he has people at school who will protect him too.
Good luck....

If I were in your situation, I would make sure that my child understood that there are just some people in the world who are rude and impatient. And that he shouldn't be discuraged by how others react to his 'special needs'. Everyone has a special need, his just happens to be visible.