How Are These Kids Getting Sleep?

Updated on February 11, 2013
S.E. asks from Landenberg, PA
13 answers

My daughter is in middle school. She gets up at 530 to get on the bus at 630. She's in school until 235. She is dyslexic so homework takes her longer than it does other kids, but I also know other kids have more homework than she does. Dinner, shower, a video game for 1/2 an hour and bed by 830 - 900

But, what feels like most of the kids we know have after school activities that last really late and they stay up until 10 to 11 at night! They go to school at the same time she does. I know one trampoline and dance group that practicies from 4 to 6 every night! My friend's daughter finishes practice at 830.

When do they sleep??? She's back to needing ten hours of sleep, These kids seem like they're getting maybe 7! Is that what is really going on??

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Truly, most kids do NOT get up at 5:30 to catch the bus anywhere. That's way early!

If I got up that early I'd put the kids to bed early too. She just can't do late nights until she gets in a school that doesn't start so early or that fixes the bus schedule. That's just crazy! She must start school at 7 or 7:30 to get on the bus that early.

If she's diagnosed with this disability then can she get some assistance through the school system for special needs. She can have oral homework or assistance in reading her homework, all sorts of assistance. I know people in college who got accommodations for learning issues like this.

I'd be telling her teachers to not send so much homework home too. She really doesn't need it.

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L.A.

answers from Austin on

Ha. I hear you.
But when I think back on our daughter, mine and my husbands teen years. we hardly got any sleep, but we just had so much energy..

I could go to school all day, do after school activities, work, do homework, go to a football game, go out for pizza.. then bed. Pop up in the morning and go all again..

I was lucky.. my mom did allow me to sleep in whenever I did have a day off.

I ws allowed to set my own schedule, but I was required, to keep school as my main focus.

Same thing with our daughter. We allowed her to make up her schedule as long as she got up without complaint and made school her priority. If she fussed in the morning, all I had to do was remind her.. I would be happy to set a bedtime if she could not get up.

All of this was great when she went to college. So many of the students were not used to being in charge of their own time. It was a transition for them.

4 moms found this helpful
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J.B.

answers from Boston on

Yes - my two oldest are in 9th grade. My SD goes to bed at 9:30 at gets up at 5:30, so she gets about 8 hours of sleep but does very little by way of activities. She does mixed-martial arts, but that's an activity outside of school and if she's busy, she can just skip it. She really likes sleep so that's the choice she makes.

My oldest son plays hockey for his school and on a club team. On Mondays he gets up at 4:30 AM for 5:30 practice and then has another practice that night from 9-10 PM. He gets to sleep at around 11 and gets up at 6:30. Sometimes on Sundays he has games at 9 PM so he gets only 5.5 hours of sleep before having an 18.5 hour day. On nights that he's home, he puts himself to bed between 8:30 and 9, takes melatonin and valerian root to fall asleep and sleeps until 6:30.

I am shocked to see the number of their peers goofing off on FB until midnight or later. I wonder why their parents don't know that they're still up and why they don't take their phones after a certain hour.

Honestly it only gets worse as they get older. Theater kids practice until midnight the week before a show, athletes are sometimes travelling back from away games after 10 PM on a school night, high school sports teams practice for several hours a day every week day after school, and then there's homework, SAT prep, driver's ed, jobs, etc.

The important thing to remember is that other than homework it's all voluntary. Some people need less sleep than others and that's OK.

2 moms found this helpful
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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

Guessing school starts at 7?

There are lots of different ways:

Some kids shower & crash in 10 minutes.
Some kids wake/shower in 10 minutes & eat in the car
(instead of having to be early for the bus)
Some kids grab a nap afterschool.

Any of those 3 options allow for 10 hours of sleep.
Combine them & they could be getting even more sleep than your daughter.

<grin> Not everyone needs to get up 1.5 hours before school starts. Imagine if your daughter only needed to get ____@____.com would mean she could go to bed 1-2 hours later and have the same sleep needs met.

Of course... Kids have different sleep needs. Some kids will also just be sleeping less. Some who need less & are fine, some who need more and are tired.

Now... Imagine if your daughter oy needed 7 hours of sleep, AND only 15 minutes to get ready!!! That's over 4 hours of time to fill!!! Be it homework, socializing, sports, hobbies, etc.

Different kids different needs.

__________

As far as daily practice in the afternoon?... Again, that's just different kids & different needs. Their free time for homework etc. would be in the evening, or early in the morning. For those who have night stuff, their free time is early morning or after school.

Different things work best for different families.

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B.F.

answers from Dallas on

You haven't seen anything yet. I was shocked like you.
My youngest is a senior in HS. All AP classes means quite a bit of homework, projects and reading. Add marching band and contests and percussion contests and you've got trouble. Any extra curricular in high school means lots of time in practice and then homework. Midnight is pretty good for a bedtime. That is if they are not sleeping on a bus somewhere on their way home. If they have a Thursday night football game, then there is probably a test in something on Friday. Junior year is the worst because of all the testing. After 8 yrs of someone being I high school, I am too tired to fight it anymore. 9th grade year of the 1st child, I spent venting. It didn't do any good.

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Many kids/teens are not getting enough sleep.
It can cause health problems as much as being obese causes problems.
Getting enough sleep needs to be a priority and many parents are just ignoring it.
This is as important as making sure your kids eat healthy food but somehow when the extra curricular activities pop up, parental common sense goes right out the window.

http://www.greatschools.org/parenting/health-nutrition/62...

http://www.sleepfoundation.org/article/sleep-topics/teens...

2 moms found this helpful

T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Depends on the kid. My 13 year old 8th grade daughter is ADHD and goes to gymnastics MWF from 5:30 to 8:30 (she goes to school from 8:30 to 3:30.) She eats and finishes homework when she gets home and is rarely asleep before 10:30 (even on non gym nights) up by 7:00, so that's about 8 hours a night.
Honestly without gymnastics she is BOUNCING off the walls and would still not be going to sleep easily.
My older daughter, a HS senior (not ADD/HD) is the complete opposite and needs 10-11 hours every night, and always has.

1 mom found this helpful

V.W.

answers from Jacksonville on

I get my kids up at 6:00 for the bus. My middle schooler doesn't get out until 3:25, and the bus doesn't drop her off until around 4:45. Son (9th grade) doesn't get out until 3:45, and rides the same bus home as daughter. They both have martial arts after school 2 days a week. We don't get home until after 7:00 pm. Sometimes it's closer to 8:00.

Daughter's class is first, then son has his class. So if he has homework, he starts on it while his sister is in class and he is waiting for his to begin. Same with her... when her class is over, she is waiting for his to end, so she can start her homework if she needs to.

Those nights, we get take out. When they get home they do any homework that is left. Shower. Then they are typically in bed around 9:30. Son usually goes to bed on his own. Daughter (11 in 6th grade) sometimes lingers awake reading in bed until closer to 10 pm and I have to remind her to put the book down and turn out the light. (I was the same when I was a kid).

Son never seems to have gotten enough sleep in the morning, but he is not a morning person in general. And he is fine later in the day. Daughter gets sufficient sleep and is a morning person, to boot.

1 mom found this helpful

B.C.

answers from Dallas on

My 12 year old gets home at 3:45, does her chores, homework and then dinner. We go to cheer on Tuesdays from 8-9pm, Tumbling on Wednesdays from 7-8 and then when volleyball starts she'll be doing that on Thursday nights from 6-7pm. She goes to bed at 10pm and wakes at 7am so she's getting her 9 hours and does well on that amount.

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A.C.

answers from Madison on

Most people in our society today, both children and adults, are seriously sleep deprived. I myself cannot figure out when most people get their sleep because they constantly seem to be up doing things!

That said, it really does depend on the individual and how much sleep that person needs. My daughter has sensory issues and has always needed her sleep and a routine/schedule. We know that if we're up late one night for something that it's going to affect her attitude and emotions for the next few days and that she's going to need to get to bed early the next few nights to make up for lost sleep.

I'm seeing so many kids being pushed into doing this or doing that that by the time many of these kids are getting to college they're already totally burned out. And I find that very sad.

But I do agree that kids--no matter if they need a lot of sleep or not as much--still aren't getting enough sleep FOR THEM. That's very detrimental for their growth and mental health.

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A.R.

answers from Dallas on

My kids have 2+ hours of soccer practice 3 nights a week. DS catches the bus at 6:40, he wakes up at 6:20. That's right, 20 minutes to get up/dressed/eat and out the door and he usually makes it with time to spare.
Shower at night, or if practice ran long he skips the shower and uses a LOT of deodorant the next day. Homework in the car or at sibling's practice. DS uses free periods at school to finish a lot of his homework. Sometimes we have dinner in the car (sandwiches, etc). You have to be flexible and the kids have to really want the extracurriculars, if you have both of those you find a way to make it work. My kids typically get 9 hours of sleep a night on practice nights.

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M.B.

answers from Austin on

That's not unusual.......

What is really sad and scary are the kids that just stay up VERY late, playing games, or texting friends...... I work in a middle school, and know that many kids go to school with a sleep deficit...

Some kids do homework in the car, during breaks at practice, on the bus, or when they can... I've seen many a student finishing homework in a class before it is due. (Most of the time they are finishing it in school is because they just didn't do it the night before..... and not because of practices!)

S.G.

answers from Grand Forks on

My kids wake up at 8:00am. They have to be at school for 9:00am. The get home at 4:00pm. They have a free hour until dinner. Dinner at 5:00pm. We usually go out to activities or just to the Y after dinner and get home around 8:00pm. Then homework (they only get 1/2 hour a day max), showers and to bed by 10:00pm. They get 10 hours sleep. They are only 7&10. My 10 year old will be in middle school next year and I hope we don't have hours of homework!

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