Home Daycare Providers - Question About Sick Policy

Updated on December 02, 2011
T.M. asks from Tampa, FL
16 answers

I have used the same home daycare for over 5 years now. She now only has my almost 4-year old daughter. She also keeps her two grandsons (younger than my daughter). When I picked up today, I find out that one of the grandsons started throwing up today. The other had massive amounts of snot running out of his little nose. Mom was sitting around the house. It didn't appear that she got a call to pick up her sick kids (or at least the one that had been throwing up). Obviously, if mine had been the one throwing up, I would have gotten the call to come get my child (and understandably so). What should be the rules here? I didn't make a fuss about it since my daughter was already exposed for sure. My husband dropped our daughter off this morning and remarked to me (before I told him about afternoon pick-up) about the little one being snotty. Since these children do not live in this house, shouldn't the rules still be the same eventhough they are family? This is not the first time something like this has happened....

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So What Happened?

I still do not understand why it is not ok for the family member to miss work...but I have to miss work for the same thing. It is difficult for me to miss work too. I do not know when in the day that the grandson threw up...I just know that the mom did not come in to get her kids and then leave quickly. They were all just hanging out like nothinghad ever happened. Like I said before I did not say anything since my daughter had already been exposed. It did annoy me greatly though...

Just another thing to note: I didn't necessarily have a problem with the child with the runny nose...my issue was with the one that had been throwing up. When I got there, he was running around like everything was fine so I don't know what caused him to throw up. There is a fine line here because there is family involved. I am the only paying parent. The other parents (mom and dad) to the sick kids just seem to be inconsiderate in general....it just got to me yesterday.

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M.P.

answers from Portland on

The woman is providing a service. The two of you need to agree on what is acceptable. If she wants to keep her grandchildren when they are ill, which is reasonable in my opinion, they're family, then you can accept that or find different day care. Then she can decide whether or not she wants to change her rules.

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J.C.

answers from Anchorage on

Having a child be snotty would not to me mean they can not have care (some kids have allergies, ect) but vomiting, is another matter all together, and yes, the rules should apply acrossed the board because the rules are to protect all the children.

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J.K.

answers from Sacramento on

The snotty one probably not. Kids get colds, some kids' noses run more than others... sometimes kids have allergies. There could be other reasons for a snotty nose. The vomiting one should absolutely not be there. I would be upset, especially if your daughter now gets a flu and won't come to daycare because of it.

Yes, kids get exposed to germs and viruses in a group childcare setting and your daughter might have been exposed even if the child had been sent home. To me though, having a kid get sick suddenly and be sent home is a lot different than having a kid get sick and allowing them to stay all day and increase the risk of exposure to everyone else.

IMO even if they are family, they should have to adhere to the same policies as you do.

I disagree that a provider's kids (or family) get special treatment in all daycare situations. My kids have always been part of my daycare and they have to follow the same rules as the other kids during daycare hours. If they are sick, of course they stay home. But I am lucky enough that they don't get sick often and when they do, my husband stays home quarantined in our bedroom so we don't expose the other kids.

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C.Z.

answers from Omaha on

I think one of the children being snotty is not a reason to exclude him from care. However, vomiting is a different story. I know that she probably has a hard time sending her grandson home (affects daughter's work schedule) so I would assume that she will continue to do this.

I would express my concerns to her and if you are not comfortable with her response, look for alternate care. You have a responsibility (as does she) to keep your child healthy. If she is not going to keep up her end of the bargin, then change childcares.

I will say, however, that in ANY childcare setting, your child will pick up germs so it may not be worth changing your arrangements.

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~.~.

answers from Tulsa on

Family is going to get special treatment. It's not always fair, but that's the way it is. A call letting you know the grandson was sick to give you the option to drop off your child would have been the way I would have wanted it handled. The in home provider I used had two kids and she would always give me a heads up if one of her kids was sick so I could decide if I would stay home.

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N.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

I agree that the same rules should apply, but she clearly showed you that will NOT be the case, unfortunately.

I have done home childcare for over 14 years, and started when my daughter was 3. If she was sick, she got seperated ALL day, but she was old enough to do that. She could sleep in my room, watch TV in there all day, eat off a tray in there, with me checking on her at regular intervals with a baby monitor in there for in between stuff. If she was too sick (like constant puking, high fever and needing Momma's constant care), then I closed. Parents just needed to understand that, in the same way that I would send their child home so they could care for them, my own child deserved that same one on one if she was that ill, or needed to go to the Dr (and hubby could not always take her due to his job).

This is why its difficult to do daycare for family or friends/neighbors.

The ball is always in your court to go to another childcare and ask this important question at an interview...do you care for any family members children? I have been asked this in addition to the question about my own child and her age. As she got older, it seemed that was a positive checked box for many parents who bothered to ask??

Good luck with your situation.

EDIT~ to Michelle, as she is the one who stated NO sick kids should be sent home. Do YOU like taking care of your child when they are puking left and right all over your furniture and carpet? Wiping the grossest of snot all over your home? Well, we do not either, and there really IS a difference between your own childs bodily fluids and someone elses. Yes, this is my business so runny noses and occasional puke and such will happen, but that also means I get to decide these rules.

I absolutely draw the line at runny diarhea and puke. HOME they go. It is impossible to care for so many other kids while trying to clean puke off of your carpet to save that. People need to have back up plans if they can not take the time off work. Create a network with relatives, neighbors, etc, or find a local "sick child care" in your area who are trained and have the actual facilities to care for sick kids. JMO~

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L._.

answers from San Diego on

My grandson does live with me. But I can tell you that when she does finally move out, I will still keep my grandson. It's a family matter. I'm not going to make my daughter miss work.

In all honesty, if it's at all possible, I keep kids for the parents too when they often should go home. We work very hard to keep those noses clean, period, wash the hands constantly, feed tons of veggies, give them vitamin c chewables like candy when needed, and we isolate sick children. We often have one child that comes down with something in the middle of the day. If the mom is a couple hours coming, only leaving work a little bit early, everyone has been exposed before we even knew. But normally, things don't pass just because they were here. We usually only see 1 or 2 children get an illness and between my days, nights, part-timers, and weekend only children, we have about 10-14 families at any one time.

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M.T.

answers from San Francisco on

I watch my niece and my rules are the same for everybody! If she has a daycare and is watching more than just her grandsons then she needs to make sure everybody follows the rules. I would just get prepared that your daughter will more than likely get sick. sorry!

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M.R.

answers from Dallas on

You are right that isn't fair but it is her family too.

However I don't think any daycare should make kids stay home when they are sick. Alot of bugs are contagious before any noticiable symptoms occur. There fore they are already exposed. If anything keeping the sick kids apart, seperate toys, sanitizer and the like can keep it from the other kids. AND

Some people just cannot miss work. If I have no PTO I dont just lose money, I may get written up. We are not allowed to be off without PTO, it is an 'occurence' and then after 5 of those its termination. My husband just started a new job. He only gets 3 days for an entire year and they are used in 4 hour increments. So if he leaves an hour early, he has to use 4 hours time off, therefore he is losing money. When I worked at Walmart, I had to leave to get sick kids too often and was fired.

On some of the comments about it costing money in doctor visits... I don't think it needs to cost money for that because the doc cant do anything for a virus anyway! Most illnesses are a virus, not a bacteria so going to the doc does nothing but waste your money. People go the the doctor way too often when it really is not needed.

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V.F.

answers from Shreveport on

Was he throwing up because of a virus or just something else, like he choked or coughed too hard. I was old that colds are ok. Kids need to build up their immune system to that, but flu and stomach virus and fever are a no no. My daughter is 2 and rarely ever has colds. We put her in daycare and she has colds a lot more. Also this cold makes her throw up when she coughs too hard. I would mention that for future times, you would like to be notified of illness so you can decide if you want to take out your child for the day.

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L.W.

answers from Kansas City on

I watch a little one and if my own kids get sick, I contact her immediately so she can make the call. I HATE when people knowingly expose my children to illness for their convenience. It can cost SO much in doctor visits, etc. and is just inconsiderate :( I totally understand the struggle, but fair is fair.

N.C.

answers from Rockford on

T., my policy if the nose is runny, they can still come, as long as there is no fever or constant cough...if the nose is runny, nonstop, I prefer they do not come. And throwing up...that's a BIG no-no! If a child throws up just because maybe they coughed too hard or something, then that's one thing, but if they are puking or have diarrhea and are clearly sick, they need to be picked up immediately!!!! NO exceptions! Part of my reasoning for that is, if I get sick, then NO one gets to come! Also, if they get sick, I have to disinfect EVERYTHING! And, I do not want to expose the anyone else...I have a family, too...I do not want anyone sick!

I would ask again what policies are for sick kids and if you feel the other kids are too sick to be there, but are anyway, I would just keep your kids home...I know that stinks for you and probably not very easy to do, but you do not want your kids sick.

And as a mom, I would be P-O'd to take my kids somewhere, to find out there are sick kids there who shouldn't be! Not everyone can be as perfect as us! LOL...totally kidding! Best of luck and I hope the sickies stay away from your home!

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S.O.

answers from Chicago on

I was in childcare for over 20 years and yes the one who was throwing up should have been sent home. The other one with the cold no. Children can get over 10 colds a year that can last up to 14 days or longer. Parents can not take off of work every time their child has a cold. Yes, maybe the child's nose needs to be wiped more often. If she is running a daycare from her home all the rules should be the same for any children she's caring for that are not living there. When I did daycare from my home the rules were different for my own children. It was their home not their daycare so they were allowed to enjoy being home. One example was my children were allowed to chew gum but not the daycare children. First of all my children were older and second I had a bad experience with a child I cared for and gum. Most the rules were the same though.

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Snot is not a send home illness. Puking, fever of 100.1 or more, and diarrhea are the reasons for kids to be sent home. Other stuff is not something they should be sent home for. If the child was puking due to snot drainage then he was not puking for a valid reason. There are all kinds of reasons a child could puke, food didn't agree, drainage, etc...can cause the gag reflex to kick in. Also hunger. My Gdaughter will puke dry heaves if she gets too hungry.

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D.F.

answers from St. Louis on

Yes, the child should have been sent home with him mother to his own home. I'm a provider who at times has my grandson over (2 yrs) if he's sick he goes home. Let your provider know how uncomfortable you are with this, I promise she dosn't want to lose your business. Ask her the next time your child is sick is she willing to keep her all day aswell? (not that you would want her to do that). Also if you pay when your child is home sick is she willing to give up that day of pay if in the next few days your daughter becomes ill because she chose to not hold her daughter accountable as a parent and come get the child. It dosn't matter whose child get sick when their sick they NEED to be removed from other children.

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C.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

The kid with the pukes, yes! I don't care why he puked and you're right, she wouldn't care either had it been your child. They should not be around other children! Chances are you can't change her and you should find other means of childcare.

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