High School Graduation Gift Etiquette

$20 or $25 would not look cheap, believe me. I remember high school graduation and just the fact that someone honored me with anything was nice.

This may sound weird, but my favorite graduation gift was a laundry basket and some detergent that I got from a friend. I was going away to college and definitely needed it. Anything you give will be appreciated. I don't think I received more than $10 from anyone non-family. Another gift I got one time was $5 an a card that said that it was to be used as "mad money" When I was so mad at my roommates I just couldn't stand it, I was supposed to take them to get ice cream. I kept that money safe and added to it and it definitely went to good use.

Don't worry about looking cheap. These kids should be grateful for any gifts they get. It's not about the amount, but about the thought. Just give what you can afford and write something really nice on the card. If they were raised right, they will be grateful that you cared to send a gift. Good luck.

Hi Shelley-
My husband is in the ministry, so we know tons of people, and everyone invites us to everything, graduations, weddings, etc.
Unless they are close family, or very close friends, we give a standard of $20 gift card for graduations, and $25 for weddings. I do homemade piggy banks for babies. This way no one gets favored and everyone gets recognized.... and it's something we can afford. Everyone always seems appreciative.
Hope this helps!
Toni

Hi S.,

I had 4 sons graduate HS and go on to college. An elderly neighbor would always bring them a beautifully packaged Parker pen or pen set. They used them all through college and two of them still have theirs. You can find them at Staples in nice boxes in the front of the store, behind the counter. www.penwa.com has them within your budget. You may also want to consider movie theater gift cards.

E. W

Whatever you're comfortable spending is a fine acknowledgement, even if it's just a card. My favorites to give are nice "gift" books for young women that are less than $20 and add a personal touch. The folks at a book store could help you find appropriate ones. Something to brighten up their dorm room if they're going away to college is also nice, like a small lamp or collection of small picture frames, or a desk-top organizer. It's nice that you're honoring them and it sounds like they're not that close. A token gift is fine.

personally, $25 sounds fine for someone you don't see very often.

My parents always gave money amount to match the year they graduated (I graduated in 1998, so I received $19.98). This year I wrote a check for $20.08... it works. The graduates won't think you're cheap.

$20 is plenty! We worked with the youth group at church and also still have a lot of young cousins, nieces and nephews so some years we just get sooo many that we're not able to even give anything outside of close family members.

Giving money with a meaningful note in a card always is a good way to go... The dollar amount really doesn't matter. $20 x 10 people giving it is $200 and at 18 that can still be a thrill... heck at any age that can be a thrill. You're on the right track.

I don't think $25 is cheap but if you want it to appear more thoughtful maybe you could get a gift card to use toward college prep items. Something like Office Max (for stationary and such), Linens n Things (for dorm room decor), or a Westcor Mall Visa card (so she can get new clothes for school). That way it doesn't look like you forgot until the last minute and just wrote a check or threw in some cash from your wallet. I think a lot of people just throw away graduation announcements so it's very nice of you to send gifts to these girls. Money is money no matter what the amount and I think they'll appreciate it. :)

I graduated 22 years ago today. I think a 25 dollar check is wonderful. I know when I got checks in the mail I was excited no matter the dollar amount. Given the state our lives are in...due to gas and food prices...this youngster will be greatful for anything!!

Hi S.-

Money is always good. I remember back to my high school graduation and a neat gift I got was actually from Amway. I do not know how much they spent on it because I was given a form with pictures and allowed to pick out my own gift (showed no prices). I picked screwdrivers and still have them today. You could look at companies that might offer this service.

J.

My daughter graduated from HS this year and she received many cards with giftcards and cash and $20 was what most people gave. I gave a couple of grad cards to my relatives and gave each $20 and I also thought at first, if I would seem cheap, but then thought "times are tough" and it should be the thought that counts, right?

I just graduated from college, and thought one of the nicest gifts was a $5 gift card to Starbucks from an aunt and uncle. The amount was much less important than the thought they put into it. I'd say to write a nice card to go along with whatever amount you send. Years later they will remember the words you wrote in a card much more than the amount you wrote a check for.

HI S.,

I have 2 kids that recently graduated and I think they would have been happy with any amount of money. You shouldn't feel bad about what you can or can not give. They are kids, they will appreciate any money they can get. Hope this helps a little.

Take care,M.
Oh and $20-25 is what my kids got too.

If money is tight and you hardly see these two girls, then 25 is not inappropriate. It isn't the best economy for many people and I'm sure that's well understood. They will have plenty of things they need, so that will help. I would give what you can afford. If anyone else closer to you or in your more direct family was to have a graduation, I would maybe consider raising it though. I got a range myself between 20-50 from aunts, uncles, and family friends. To summarize my opinion - base it on closeness and what you can afford. They'll be happy to get a gift.

Hello S.,

No you will not look cheap if you send $20-25. That is about the amount my daughter received from everyone when she Graduated 2 years ago. I think anything you send is a nice gesture and will be appreciated. It shows the person who is receiving the gift that you thought of them.

D.

S.,
You are totally on track with the amount that you were planning for each. Here's an idea for cash...go to the bank and ask for a new $20 bill. This will look crisp in the card, and show some planning on your part as well.

When I graduated from HS and college, cash was a great; but I also appreciated the inspirational books that I received. You may want to consider getting a book (maybe one that has been an encouragement to you) and then tucking possibly a crisp $5 or Starbucks card in the front cover the book (whatever is left over from your budgeted $20) as a surprise with an encouraging note from you as well. This will show them that you take an interest in improving their future as well as acknowledging their accomplishments.

S.,
I think that no matter the dollar amount, your thought will be appreciated. I do agree though that a giftcard may be more appropriate to help with college prep items.
Best of luck to you! :)
~D.

The only person I recieved any more than $20 from was my gma. Money is always a great gift for a graduate.

You are very kind for wanting to do something because I know how it is with money being tight - we have 3 family bdays and fathers day this weekend! I think money or gift cards are great. That way they are guaranteed to get something they really want and will use - so not taking the chance of 'wasting' your money. Something my mom has always done is give them an exact amount of money according to the year they graduate.....it sounds odd.....but I thought it was quite clever. For example......for 2008 she would write a check for $20.08
At first people think its wierd, but then when they catch on they think its cute. Just a thought.

the amount you have offered seems appropriate to me - I have had two of my three sons graduate from high school and college in the past five years - and anything is appreciated when it has a dollar sign in front of it - if they think you cheap then they are ungrateful and not worth your time in the future

S.: I agree with so many others it is the thought that counts. Rose had a good suggestion. I think we all worry too much about what others think. I personally have always been a card person from a very young age. I would have as a child been more hurt about not getting a card than a present (this is true). I think very nice words of encouragement, and if you are a person of faith, about God would be very nice.

Take care,
K.

I think CASH is the best high school graduation gift around, and since these girls aren't close family/friends I think $20-25 would be perfect!

Gift cards are a win win situation. Or they have these gift cards from your bank that you put any amount you wnat on it and it looks like a credit card. They can spend it anywhere that accepts VISA. That's what my mom does for us. You can also get them a cute necklace or bracelet maybe earrings from someplace that does not take all of your budget.

I have a suggestion that has been a huge hit with all the young people we get announcements for. Get them an IKEA or Container store gift card. It is slightly more personal than the cash and they need it for inspiration as they start to make their way out on their own. I always get a thank you card telling me how much fun they had getting the things they needed for their Dorm room or apartment. It doesn't matter the denomination, you go with what you have. Both stores they can shop online.

my son jsut graduated form high school and beleive me each and every dollar he go was well received. he jsut moved to phoenix and the money will help with gas. the most meaningful gift he got, the one that made him cry was from a janitor at school. this man is dvelopmentally disabled but he is a hard worker. a lot of the kids make fun of him but my son has always admired his work ethic and always makes it a point ot be nice to him. when we were addressing his announcments. he siad he wanted to give one to him. i was with him when he hand delivered it to him. he claled him over and at first the man was reluctant to come to but when he saw it was my son he ran over to him and shook his hand. my son gave him the envelope andhe asked what it was. He told him it was an invitation to go to his graduation. the man just beamed . he said he had to work that night cleaning the floors and setting and taking down the chairs but he said he was going to try and sneak out a couple of times to see my son graduate. we didnt think anything of it but my son kept saying that he hadnt seen him smile so much. a few days after graduation we got a card in the mail. it was from the janitor. the card was beautiful and had ahandwritten and very inspirational relifious message. we are by no means relifious but that card brought tears to my sons eyes. he read it over and over several times as he wiped away tears. it it was also a gift card to dairy queen and the janitor message was the when he was stressed out at college , my son was to go get an ice cream cone because ice cream is good for the soul. it was only for 5 dollars but the message is what mattered. We know that he doesnt make much money and this must have been what he could afford. he also said that he had never gotten an invitation to anything in his life before and that he had seen him two times during graduation, once when he got his diploma and once when he was getting a scholarship. he said that he yelled really loud for him. the day before my son left for phoenix he packed a special lunch. he took it to the school and got permission form the principal to take the janitor on a picnic during his lunch. They had a wonderful time at the park . my son told me he was sorry that he hadnt taken the time to get to know him better becasue he was and awesome person.But that every tiem he comes home he and the janitor have a date for a picnic. so i guess what i am trying to say is that it doesnt matter what amount you put in there, it si the thought that counts and hopefully the reciepients of your gift will be as grateful as my son.

also, my husband and i are very involved in the high school wreslting program. the first year i cringed at the though of having to give out so many gifts at graduation. a simple rule has worked out just fine , except the kids are starting to pick up on it. we only give 20 dollars to the kids that send us an announcemnt. the first year we gave to all the seniors and that was a budget breaker. the sceond year we only got two announcemnts so we split what we had budgeted $200 between teh two. the second year we 4, this year we got 10 so they each got 20.

I don't think that would look cheap at all, and, in fact, I think you could give less if that is stretching your budget. I recently graduated (from a doctoral program not high school, but I still think this is relevant), and one of the great things about it were the cards, no gifts, in which people gave their own unique and genuine acknowledgment of my accomplishment. What they wrote about knowing how hard I'd worked and what a great thing it was to have done--it felt worth it. I know these girls are much younger than I, but I don't think teenagers hear often enough that they have truly accomplished something important. Many kids never graduate from high school. I think the best thing you could do is write them a sincere and personal message letting them know that you recognize them. Even to an eighteen year old, this will mean more than money.

I have several graduation a year and started giving the high school graduates a savings bonds from any local bank. These are wonderful as gifts.

Good luck on your choice.

I'm a grandmother but remember the drill when my daughter (now 39)graduated from high school. Believe me, ANY money gift is appreciated because it all adds up. I personally believe that huge amounts as gifts should be reserved for relatives closer to the graduate--like parents, grandparents. Good luck.

That sounds adequate to me. When my children graduated 5 or more years ago, they received anywhere from $10-$50. It is the thought that counts. That is what I would give ($20).

I hope this doesn't sound cold, but isn't it better to appear cheap than to blow your budget? If these girls are so mercenary that they can't appreciate $20 to $25 from someone they don't know all that well, then their priorities are in the wrong place!

All I received as gifts when I graduated 6 years ago was cash, and it was usually $20.

There is a great Dr. Seuss book called "Oh the places you will go". It is perfect for graduations no matter what the age. My niece got one for her college graduation and loved it. Another idea would be a gift card to Office Max to purchase products that they would need for college. Hope this helps.

G.

I think any amount would be appropriate. Funds are tight for all of us right now, there's no shame in that. If you don't want the amount to be obvious maybe a book on college life or a day planner would be a wonderful gift. College students tend to eat out a lot so a gift card for a popular restaurant would be a thoughtful gift too. Whatever you decide I think just acknowledging the acheivement is appreciated. Good luck with your graduates!

I gave out $25 gas cards to a local gas station! Maybe a giftcard to Hastings? Kids of all ages love CD's. Good luck!