Help - My 10 Mo Old Is VERY Cranky. Cries, Bites Hits

Updated on December 30, 2008
K.B. asks from Phoenix, AZ
17 answers

My son is now almost 11 mo old and has always been "high maintenance" He cried pretty much non stop for the first 4 months, and none of the doctors could ever give me a reason other than colic...He had SEVERE excema up until October which I wrote most of his crankiness off to. Took him to many doctors and never found a solution but finally have it under control with natural products.
My problem now is that he still screams a lot, every time he wakes up from a nap, he is screaming, when I put him down he screams, when I try to get him down for naps, he screams, and if he is a really cranky mood he will bite, hit pinch, scratch, and gouge at my eyes, or pull my hair. I dont know how to deal with this. I have tried stearn No's , I have tried putting him in the play pen, I just dont know what the problem is. I dont know if he is in pain, or just ANGRY. I thought it was just a baby phase he was going through, but it is getting worse, and he is getting too old to be acting like this. He bites at anything, my skin, his shirt, the couch, anything... If anyone has any advice I would be very greatful! My husband and I are at a loss. we dont want him turning into a cranky whiny young man.

Update: I have taken him to "the Best" allergists in the valley, and they will only prescribe more cremes and ointments, and say he is too young to test for allergies. He has been to 2 allergists and 4 dermatologists, 5 pediatricians, 1 naturopath and 2 chiropractors... My husband recently lost his job, and we have no insurance so to keep taking him to new doctors at $400 a pop to tell me nothing but try a new creme is not helping. How do you get them to test him for allergies? THey just wont do it... I have eliminated just about everythign from my diet, and it doesnt seem to help. On the sleep note, he doesnt sleep he gets 2 naps during the day but will only sleep for 1/2 to 1 hour... 2 at the absolute most. At night he is up at least 3-4 times to eat. He sleeps in his own crib, but sometimes sleeps with me on the mat on his floor if I am too tires to get him back in the crib. (I havent had a good nights sleep in over a year!) I have tried gripe water, and a natural herbal remedy that is a tea, even tried baby motrin a couple times to see if it was just teething. no difference.
and on a slightly different note, this all really started after his circumcision at 3 weeks old. Since then he grabs at his privates with no mercy, usually till they bleed if I cant get to his hands fast enough. The skin seems to be attached way tooo high and it has stretched a bled on its own a few times. I have gotten other peds to "kind of say" that something is wrong with the circ. but nobody will tell me what to do other than he may need surgery when he is a teenager to fix it. BBut wont tell me anything that can help him in the mean time.
ARGHGHGHGGH I am soooo frustrated with doctors.... :-(

What can I do next?

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Featured Answers

N.H.

answers from Phoenix on

Kristine, You have received very good advice so far. I would also say allergies. Dairy is a huge offender for all of his issues. Good luck

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L.R.

answers from Phoenix on

Sorry you're going through this! Two thoughts: (1) allergies; (2) teething. Or both.

Best of luck...
L.

More Answers

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D.T.

answers from Phoenix on

it sounds like your son might be allergic to something, which would explain the eczema. maybe dairy?

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N.P.

answers from Yuma on

I don't have any sons so I don't know about the circumcision issues. But as the mother of two grown daughters I am telling you this- get that child to as many doctors as you can until you get to one that listens. There is something very wrong here. I don't think your son is whining , I think he is trying his hardest to let mom and dad know he needs help. Sometimes a childs natural temperament can lead us busy parents to look there first . My youngest daughter was high maintenance from her first breath. She never took a nap and did not sleep the night through until she was 8 years old. She too, had pretty serious excema and our pediatrician advised us to use Eucerin products ( it worked great by the way). It seems like maybe allergies would not be my first concern here. Since the extreme behavior you describe can be connected with a particular event I would be looking at that. If he were older and started acting like this I am sure you would be camped out at the doctors office until they ruled out everything . Good luck with all this. It sounds like you don't have any trouble being a champion for your children so don't stop now.

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M.V.

answers from Phoenix on

There are a couple different specialists to try out, a pediatric urologist (one in pch but I can't remember the name) and a ped allergist. They probably don't want to do the allergy test because it is very painful for kids, so I get that. Be prepared for that. He might have these fits when he pees so he might be in a lot of pain.

You're not a first time mom, so your dr's need to give you a little more respect. Don't know where you live, but if you are in the east valley I have gotten more support than most people have with my peds group, TLC Pediatrics in awatukee.

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G.H.

answers from Las Cruces on

Please take him to an allergist for children and dermatologist for children and they may have to send
you to other specialists after that...something is going
on here, as you well know, and I lean to allergies which
could also be the skin, but you need professional help
quickly.
God Bless your precious family....
G.
(WAHM, wife, grammie)

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C.M.

answers from Phoenix on

I'm sorry for your frustration. This is second hand information and I honestly don't have all of it; however, my nephew had to have his circumcision "corrected" somewhere around the age of 3...maybe even earlier, I can't remember. If you really feel that his circumcision was the true beginning (which I would question if it weren't for the private grabbing/scratching), then try to go that route - start with the pediatrician. But like someone else said, keep fighting for your baby. There's a high maintenance baby, and then there's the baby that has something wrong but can't tell you. You are the mom, you know him the best - you'll help him, I know you can do it! Lots of prayers for a solution coming your way!

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J.P.

answers from Phoenix on

My first guess would be Alleries!!! You need to find out what is bothering him. The best is if you can find someone who tests for genetic allergies. It only involves one small pin prick on the earlobe (So you avoid a lot of unnecessary pain) and they test the blood for not just the proteins (but the whole food, or other item being tested for) Most allergy testing only tests for the proteins. (The protein may not be the part you're allergic to) Also, it will tell you about allergy combinations. Such as: My daughter can eat eggs, and she can eat grains, but she cannot eat them both, within 5 hours of each other. The combination causes an allergic reaction. If you cannot find a good doctor that will test for genetic allergies, I would highly suggest just doing the elimination diet. (He's young enough, this should be easy) Take away everything and start feeding only one food at a time for about a week, then start a new item. (It's best if the food you try is a food he's not already eating.... so you know you're not feeding him whatever is bothering him now) Most people say Rice is the best, as no one is allergic to rice however, he could be allergic to rice as well, my son is HIGHLY allergic to rice. (Cannot even be near rice) Also, consider allergens to pets, plants etc..........
If it's not allergies, I consider teething. However, I would definitely try finding his allergens. I have two children, both with very bad allergies and yes, their behavior reflects when they have had something they are allergic to. So does their skin.

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V.J.

answers from Phoenix on

Hi Kristine,

I really feel for you. He is most likely in pain from allergies. Eczema is linked with allergies and severe intestinal pain. The way we figured out what our son is allergic to is our doctor ordered a blood test for us. They take a vial of blood and test it against a lot of common allergies. You can also tell he is in pain probably by the cry. It is very high pitched and screaming and desperate.

My son had colic really bad at the beginning of his life. He is breastfed. I had to cut out everything besides meat, veggies, and fruits and it calmed down and he was a really happy baby. But before that, he would scream miserably in pain all day and night. Nothing would calm him down.

He cleared up with my diet changes. When we started supplementing with formula and my diet changed back to stuff I like to eat at about 5 months, he started breaking out really badly in eczema and hives sometimes. He was also miserable and in pain. We tried lots of different formulas. When we got the blood test, he was allergic to just about everything: milk, eggs, wheat, soy, peanuts, and oats. It's been hard, but ever since we stopped all of it and I've cut it out of my diet, his ezcema is totally clear and he is a lot happier. He's about your son's age.

The doctor said a lot of these things clear up by age 2, so hang in there!

Best of luck to you,
V.

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S.L.

answers from Tucson on

Calmazon is an all-natural and completely safe herbal blend that works wonders on all age groups. I have seen it work myself on a seven-month-old teething baby who refused to sleep for more than a couple hours at a snatch. His mom started giving him some and within five minutes he was asleep on her shoulder (something he never did) - he napped on the floor of the living room while we chatted for a good solid hour before other kids running by woke him - she started giving it to him "as needed" and within a month or so he was sleeping through the night and much less cranky while teething or otherwise. If you want to know the specific herbs in the formula you can contact me or you can see it on my website: www.shootingstarherbs.amazonherb.net

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C.L.

answers from Phoenix on

Wow I hear you. My daughter screamed the first six moths of her life until I started sleeping her ALOT. She actually needed to go to bed around 430 and would sleep all night until 6 AM. What a difference that made in all of our lives. She hardly ever cried then. soo...First make sure he is getting enough sleep. When children are not getting enough sleep they act this way, because they have no self control. He should be going to bed between 6-8 sleeping all night unattended to 6-8 in the morning. One and half to two hours after awakening he needs a 1-2 hour nap and then one and half hours to two hours later he needs another the same length. Most children need a third around 5 for 30 minutes - 1 hour. There is a great book that explains all of this call Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child by Marc Wiesenbluth. Saved my life. While they are catching up they may sleep way more than expected. Actually the more rested they are the better they sleep and act. Second if you are certain he is getting enough sleep talk to your Dr about what is going on. (He does have eczema and about 60% of childhood eczema is allergies and they can have allergies to different things. ) They will guide you through. Be sure when you make an appointment to ask for an extended appointment so they will have enough time to spend with you. Good Luck. My high maintenance little girl is six and still high maintenance, but extremely pleasant to be around. Maybe that can give you a little hope. Good luck!! and I hope this helps.

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L.W.

answers from Santa Fe on

Our five year old was high maintenance too, and I was at a loss. I did notice that he was constipated a lot, and on the advice of my sister, took him to a chiropractor. In one session his constipation went away. It seemed to help his disposition a lot. Around the same time, I also took him to a homeopathic doctor who gave him a treatment. Between the two of them, he came full circle. I don't know if growing out of it had anything to do with it, but I do know that if I were you, I would try to get to the bottom of what's ailing your son. Don't stop until you find something that works. It sounds like he might be in pain.

Oh, just read the update. So, in that case, I would do this: if you can't get someone to test him for allergies, you can test him yourself. If you eliminate the major allergens, like wheat, dairy, soy, eggs, strawberries and peanuts from both of your diets for a week or two, just eat the plainest chicken and rice stuff, you can slowly introduce things back in and see if he has a reaction. My sister's baby was colicky and that helped them immensely.

He is a lucky little guy to have a mom who is fighting for him. I know it's frustrating at times--I remember locking myself in the bedroom and thinking I just didn't like my son sometimes--but this will pass. Best of luck to you! Hang in there, mama.

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S.S.

answers from Phoenix on

Kristine, I am SO sorry for all you are going through when this is supposed to be a happy time in your life.
I beg you to drop everything & take him to my 11 mo olds Naturopathic Dr, Dr Orona. She specializes in pediatric & adult allergies & CAN test him NONinvasive w/ NO needles. SIX GI Drs & 1 allergist told us at 3 mo my daughter was too young to be tested & the crying/constipation was out of control. After being hospitalized for 1 MONTH for NO reason!! THANK GOD someone referred me to her & I went then or I could possibly be right where you are now. It was WAY cheaper than I thought. A few hundred dollars spread over a few appts & she was literally CURED w/in days.
I went back to the GI Dr to follow up & said shame on them!! They told me she couldnt be "cured" & not only was she but so was I! I had severe food allergies for 25 yrs & got treated w/ her so I can assure you it works.
I have sent 5 people to her so far for allergies (ALL thrilled w/ the results) & now I am being treated for a condition called hyperhydrosis (sweaty hands!)
She is one of a select few in the USA trained in the "NEAT" program. Natural Elimination of Allergy Treatment.
There are about 5 Naturopaths in the office & they all work together amazing. I'm sure she will be able to look at your sons circ also & will bring in another Dr if needed.
Please feel free to call/contact me w/ questions.
S.
my contact info & # are on this website
www.shannonstair.myarbonne.com

Dr Orona has an office at 32st & Thunderbird ###-###-####
& Elliot & McClintock (on Wed & Fri only)

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D.H.

answers from Phoenix on

This is not normal, and if your doctors say it is, then get a new doctor!

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P.Z.

answers from Phoenix on

Have you spoken with a plastic surgeon yet. A Ped may not understand the nerves etc. associated with a faulty circumcision. Everything else associated with your child, like the excema etc. may be cause by the stress of unrelenting pain.

Also, I don't know if you are spiritual people or believers in Jesus Christ but there is a strong discerning spirit of compassion and healing at my church. My Pastor, Teresa Lyeria is remarkable in her commitment to healing and restoring individuals and families. If you have tried everything else, you may want to consider a free visit with her. With your financial situation and the prospects of a tormented child, it may be worth sharing with her. Even if you have been praying and are believers, there are those who have a stronger anointing for specific ministry than others. I will be praying for answers for you also.

If you want to contact Pastor Teresa
Website: [email protected]____.com
Email: www.RiverChurch America.com
Call: ###-###-####

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J.F.

answers from Phoenix on

I have a high maintenance, whiney child as well. He too cried for the first 4 months, then whined all day, every day and still does at 22 mo. He wakes up crying everytime he sleeps. It's maddening. He had reflux but was on medication. I know too that everytime I took him to the doctor for routine checks he had "sucken ear drums" or pressure in his ears. Twice he had ear infections. If I was holding him, which was pretty much all the time, and he hit or bit, I would immediately put him down and tell him "No___!" Then pick him up again. If he continued, I would put him in his crib and come back to get him in 1 minute. This did work! The same goes for the whining! I would tell him "No whining!" and put him down or in his crib. He did get it and has gotten much better. He has also gotten less whiney as he is begining to learn to communicate in other ways. He still whines a great deal for Grandma as she tolerates it, so I know what I did has helped stop it. I think it starts out that they are in pain but then it becomes a habit. By the way, he now throws the worst tantrums I've ever seen. He climbs in his crib and will cry for an hour and not allow anyone to pick him up. I chalk a lot of it up to personality. Hang in there! He will grow up some day : )

On the update: I have eczema and it makes me feel like I want to scratch my skin off. It drives me insane. Maybe he is feeling that way too! I had 2 pediatricians offer to do blood allergy tests on one of my kids, so I say, just keep pushing and pushing. My daughter was sickly and no one took me seriously for the longest time. If I had it to do over again, I would have pushed harder. I would have shown up at the docs office every day or seen a new one every day until I could get answers. Because she suffered for a long time (try this and wait 10 days, do this and come back in 2 weeks) NO! Fight for answers and keep pushing! A mother's instinct is always right! Prayers to you!

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J.V.

answers from Phoenix on

I was also thinking allergy. This is what we did to help my son with his reflux and allergies: http://www.azadvancedmed.com/allergy.html

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