Help Me Stop My Husband's Snoring

Updated on January 07, 2011
K.M. asks from Oklahoma City, OK
19 answers

Funny how subjects come up en masse on this site, isn't it? Lots of moms have recently posted questions related to not getting enough sleep. I'm not suffering because of my kids like most though; instead it's my husband and his snoring. I have been researching online to see what remedies are out there. I'm pretty sure he has a deviated septum, but he's already had back surgery and a vasectomy within the last year, so now would not be a good time to suggest more surgery for that. He does use Breathe-Rights with some limited success; they don't always help. He frequently takes a decongestant before bed and that seems to help too. Sometimes I can wake him up and ask him to change positions, and that works occasionally, but I always feel bad for waking him up even though I'm not getting any sleep either. I recently read about a tea made with rosemary and sage that is supposed to help with snoring--has anyone tried that? What other ideas have worked for you? I fear we may have to trade nights on the couch if I can't find a solution soon!

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So What Happened?

Thanks for the ideas. I've suggested the sleep study before and he was not interested. I will just have to gently keep on him about it and hopefully sooner or later he will go. I hate the idea of him having to wear a cpap--I just don't see how that could be comfortable, but I guess a lot of people do it and have gotten used to it. He doesn't snore every night, just sometimes. But when he does, sometimes it's so loud I can still hear him (through the closed bedroom door and down the hall) once I've moved to the couch. Sometimes it's much lighter and if I fall asleep first, I can sleep through it.

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answers from Pittsburgh on

I'm thinking of trying the tea made with arsenic and Drano....I've just about HAD it after 13.5 years of this! (Sorry--had to rant!)

5 moms found this helpful


answers from Los Angeles on

So relate! Unfortunately the only "foolproof" solution I've found (after 20 years of marriage to a snorer) is to go to sleep before him! It only works if nothing else wakes me in the night, but, more often than not, if I go to bed about 30 mins or so before him, I'm in a deep enough sleep that I don't hear his snoring! Good luck!! :)

1 mom found this helpful

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answers from Harrisburg on

Have him tested for sleep apnea!

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Abilene on

Has he had a sleep apnea test? My husband uses a c-pap or bi-pap machine and it allows him to sleep through the night and stopped the snoring which is like a chain saw. Insurance paid.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Los Angeles on

No remedies worked for my husband except a cpap - now I sleep in bliss!

1 mom found this helpful


answers from New York on

Oh, I feel for you! My husband's snoring got so bad (years ago) that he underwent surgery to repair his deviated septum. Unfortunately, this was only a temporary fix - the snoring eventually went back to pre-surgery levels (and the surgery itself was no picnic!). His doctor encouraged him to lose weight, which he did, but again it did not have a long-term effect on the snoring. He was tired all the time from not getting enough sleep, and I was beyond frustrated. Fast forward many sleepless nights and breathe right/decongestant/tennis-ball-filled evenings later, I finally convinced him to go for a sleep study, and lo and behold, he was diagnosed with moderate to severe sleep apnea. This was about 3 years ago now. He was given a CPAP machine and it has made a BIG difference! Not to say the snoring has completely stopped (it's actually muffled by the mouthpiece), but he is resting much better and the machine provides a "white noise" that I can deal with. I've gotten in the habit of making sure I fall asleep first, so that by the time he gets the whole thing hooked up and operational, I'm oblivious to it (I know, how romantic!LOL). Anyway, I'm grateful that we both get uninterrupted sleep now, and that the CPAP has potentially saved him from going to an early grave. If I were you, I would skip the home remedies and encourage hubby to have a sleep study done. It's easy and painless and could give you the answers you're looking for. Good Luck!

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Las Vegas on

my husband wears TWO of those breath right strips, which actually seems to help. Additionally, when he was heavier, he definitely snored more.. (I know weight affects) because when I was pregnant I snored.. when normally, I do not.. Anyway.. try two breath right strips and see if that works.. .. another thing that helps is when my husband goes to yoga on a regular basis. It works because they do a lot of breathing exercises and I believe it helps to open up the nasal cavity .. I have known two people who had that surgery and in their cases, the surgeries DIDN'T work.. and they still sore... that should be a last resort..


answers from Dallas on

Two words: Ear. Plugs. Works for me, I sleep like a baby! =)



answers from Atlanta on

Hi K.,

If someone snores they are not in the most restful sleep. There are many reasons that cause people to snore but people that get into the deep REM sleep DO NOT snore. With that said, I give my husband a supplement called RestEZ that is primarily Valerian root. It does not make him drowsy but causes his body to relax enough to get restful sleep. He wakes up refreshed and not dopey. WE both win! My husband hasn't snored in years except for an occasional afternoon in front of a football game. They say valerian root needs to build up in your system to be helpful but I found with my husband that the first dose worked wonders.

It's worth a try to avoid the surgery...too much anesthesia can cause all sorts of neurological issues that can cause someone not to sleep too well....

God bless,




answers from Fayetteville on

Have your husbands Doctor recommend that he do a sleep study, it sounds like he has sleep apena. My husband would wake me up because my snoring was so loud and I would wake myself up jerking awake because I was not breathing like I should. If you are overweight it makes it worse. The sleep study requires you to go to the clinic and sleep overnight, they hook you up with wires which records your pattern and after a couple of hours they hook you up if needed to a breathing machine which if you have sleep apena will make a huge difference in the snoring.



answers from St. Louis on

okay, here's the worst-case scenario: in Oct 09, my father passed away from aerterial fibrillation. He was a entire life.

3 months later, Jan '10....his brother was diagnosed with a.fib too. 10+ years ago, my uncle had surgery to help with the snoring....which was unsuccessful.

He has now spent one full year battling the a.fib which his cardiologist swears is a direct result of years of untreated sleep apnea. The timeline based on the cardio's opinion would be: snoring as a result of the sleep apnea, enlarged heart as a result of the sleep apnea, & now the a.fib .....which could end up killing him it did my father.

My uncle is now using a c-pap for the sleep apnea, but it is not a direct result of living all those years with it. His body is resisting change & not adapting to the equipment as it should.....therefore the treatment for the a.fib is also not working. How's that for a cluster mess-up?

Soooo, as I said, this is a worst-case scenario. Please have your husband seek treatment soon!



answers from Minneapolis on

Send him for a sleep study. No surgery just spending the night away. At the end they will KNOW EXACTLY the reason behind the snoring and will FIX it for you... May not even need surgery. My kids call my DH's CPAP; "The Snore Buster".



answers from Philadelphia on

When you find out, let me know! My husband is always worse on his back or after having any alcohol. I also notice he has put on some weight and that also makes it worse. Going out of my mind here!


answers from Detroit on

Does he stop breathing at any point? If so, it's apnea. It is treated with a CPAP machine.

My hubby's snoring was GREATLY reduced by a Tempurpedic neck pillow. Expensive? Yes, but they last decades. They also reduce allergy issues. My hubby has apnea and refuses to wear a CPAP mask.

Apnea can cause serious issues. Heart issues, diabetes, respiratory problems... Check it out on WebMD.



answers from Birmingham on

For us, there's no solution. He snores and wishes he didn't but I can't sleep at ALL when it's happening. I really miss sleeping a full night with my dear husband of 25 years. We have a wonderful marriage and are intimate with each other when it's possible around our children, however when it's time to sleep, I stay in my cozy spot of the bed and he slips in to a guest room or loves to sleep in his recliner. We both decided we couldn't stress about it and we both needed our sleep, however it had to happen. The kids know it has nothing to do with our love - it's all about dad's snoring. I have more and more friends that have to do this too just to survive the night with some sleep and sanity.


answers from Richmond on

He really needs to go to a sleep specialist, but a short term solution/old wives tale: while he's asleep on his side, slide a tennis ball under his shirt in the middle of his back... it will prevent him from rolling onto his back at night, which usually makes snoring worse. Other than that, try Denise P's idea ;)



answers from Washington DC on

I feel you on this one! My mom moved out of their room into my room when I moved out and said it was the best sleep she was having in 30 years. I made my husband do a sleep study which revealed that he snored (duh!) but he didn't have sleep apnea, so there wasn't much they could do for him. He has a large uvula (the thing that hangs in the back of his throat) but there is no way he would be willing to have surgery on it. I have found that a cool mist humidifier right next to him helps a lot. And I have also found a connection between the medications he takes. As soon as he goes off his antidepressants, the snoring stops, when he goes back on, it starts again. and alcohol will make it incredibly horrible. Keep him off his back.



answers from Chicago on

This may be more serious than it appears. It is quite possible he has a sleep disorder, perhaps sleep apnea. Of course, I'm not a physician nor am I a sleep disorder specialist so it could also be just simply - snoring.

A quick check by his primary care physician would be helpful. Good luck and hope you get some sleep soon!


answers from New York on

Like Margaret V.'s husband, mine went for a sleep study and was diagnosed with severe sleep apnea (his mom had it too). My husband has been using a CPAP machine so long that when he first got it, my daughter thought it was a NooNoo (Teletubbies)! The CPAP has been a life saver for my husband who has much more productive sleep now. And the white noise does help me sleep too. NO worries on the romance, though. He DOES NOT wear it when he is awake! LOL. Oh, and just to prep you, it may take a while, many months in fact, before your husband puts it on and keeps it on! My husband would pull it off numerous times a night during those first few months. When his snoring awoke me, I would gently nudge him and tell him to put on his mask again. It helped him greatly to get out of the habit of pulling it off. Now the CPAP machine is so precious to him that he seriously considered turning around 2 hours into the drive to our mini-vacation on the Jersey shore when he forgot it at home. Let's just say that was not a restful mini-vacation for him :(

All the best and encourage him to go in for that sleep study.

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