Help Me Out, I Need to Know How I Should Approach This...

Updated on February 06, 2012
S.B. asks from Chicago, IL
10 answers

So, this year I decided to get out and do more, for myself and with my son. This past Friday I attended my first MOPS meeting (mothers of preschoolers). I took my son to their Moppets childcare program, and since he's 2, he was placed in the toddler room. There was a very nice older woman in charge along with a young helper (I'd guess she was 10-12 yrs old). My son is not potty trained, so I left them a diaper bag with diapers, wipes, and extra clothes. I told the woman that he had just been changed, but I was leaving the bag just in case. The meeting was only for 2 hours, and my son had such a fun time that it was hard to pull him away. But after I got him and we were on our way outside, I noticed he had a poopy diaper. It was only a 5 minute drive to our next destination, so I changed him there. His butt was really red, so it had happened awhile before I picked him up. I'm so disappointed that they would not notice he had a poopy diaper and change him. Especially since all the women were just raving about how excellent the childcare is. I'm really looking forward to the next meeting, but I feel like I should say something about this diaper changing situation. I just don't want it to come out bitchy, so I need some help finding the words. Should I say something directly to the caregiver, or should I approach the group leader about it? Or should I just let it go this time and if it happens again say something then? Thanks for your help!

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

So What Happened?

Thanks ladies, I'm going to let it go for the time being, but if it happens again I will for sure be addressing it. For the record though, there weren't that many children in that room (maybe 5?) and the poop was dried to his butt when I changed him so I do know it had been there awhile. I realize that mistakes happen, and I myself have gotten busy and left him in a poopy diaper too long before. But this lady is doing nothing but watching the children in a small playroom, so I just don't understand how it got missed. The fact that he is in diapers was known to them, and not one person told me that they would not change his diaper. I will take the advice to just ask that he be checked more often in case he does poop, because sometimes he may not be too stinky.

Featured Answers



answers from Raleigh on

Just let it go this time and say something if it happens again. My mother and MIL watch my daughter, and even they don't catch the poopy ones from time to time.

3 moms found this helpful

More Answers


answers from Dallas on

There have been occassions when my son has pooped and it's not been 10 minutes and his bottom is red.

I'm not taking up for them, I'm just saying that unless it's caked on crusted or his diaper is overly wet I'd give them the benefit of the doubt.

Next time tho, count the diapers in your diaper bag and if none are missing then you know, but I'd see if this is reoccuring before I'd say they did this on purpose.

Sending good thoughts your way.

4 moms found this helpful


answers from Atlanta on

I wouldn't say anything. They had a room full of kids -right? This has happened on more than one occasion with one of my boys at the Y or in some similar situation as yours. The way I see it -they're watching my child for free and he's having a great time, if he needs an extra swipe of A&D Ointment -no biggie. It would be different to me if the poop and/or pee was running down his legs, getting on things -obvious and still unattended.

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Los Angeles on

I say let it go but if it happens again then you can say something.

~I always had the opposite approach and was NEVER comfortable with anyone changing my kids' diapers...ever! I would have had them call me or come get me if he needed a change....but that's just me :)

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Kansas City on

I say talk to the caregiver. I would simply say, "We had so much fun last time, but I noticed that his diaper was dirty when I picked him up, and when I changed it he was really red. Is there a policy I should know about changing diapers? Do I need to come check on him half way through the meeting and change him myself?" There is always a possibility that he went right after he was checked, and if we was running around playing and didn't give any indication that he had gone, they wouldn't have noticed. However, if there are issues in the future, you may need to find different care for him while you go to the meeting. Hope this helps!

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Minneapolis on

There could have been several reasons he was not changed before handing him off. If he had pooped earlier then it was maybe a accidently missed one, since there were other kids in the room. Heck I have 2 in diapers at home and often mistake one for the culprit and not check the other, and then catch one digging at their tush, cause of a itchy pooper. Since it was one time, and he wasn't covered head to toe, mark it up as a simple mistake. If it happened again I would then of course raise a fuss about it. Like " this is the second time you missed his poop diaper, could you check more often" if you don't like directness you could tell them, "he has sensitive skin, and gets horrible skin ulcers if he sits in it more than 10 minutes. So please be sure to check him often"... that's my usual line if I dont have time to explain that they are dropping the ball.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Kansas City on

I've worked in MOPS nurseries at three different churches and sometimes there are so many kids it's hard to catch all diapers but I will say we did the best we could and changed all before they left to go home. I think sometimes you change one first and then they might go or maybe they did miss it but I would just kindly ask that they check him to be sure he doesn't get diaper rash. I'm sure they'd understand, or hope they would. I loved working in MOPS and especially when I worked with my oldest daughter too. I hope you won't let this keep you from going back and leaving your son.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Denver on

You might ask them what their procedure is. Usually, they want to change them quickly to get rid of the I don't think they're lazy, they probably didn't catch it.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Detroit on

Some places have a policy where they may not be allowed to change diapers or wipe a child's private area, so I would just ask them what their policy is, because you noticed he had poop in his diaper when you picked him up last time. I would agree that in a room full of toddlers, it's easy to miss a poopy diaper, especially if it isn't obviously stinky. You didn't notice it yourself until you were outside alone with him. And it doesn't take that long for bums to get red from poop either.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Houston on

When you drop him off next time, just tell them he is due for a poop so please check him and change him immediately.

1 mom found this helpful
For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions