Help for Hormonal 13 Year Old

Updated on June 02, 2008
L.W. asks from Denton, TX
7 answers

One day I will ask God why he thought menopause and teenagers go together. I am sure there is a good "iron sharpens iron" but otherwise I am at a loss. My sweet daughter is almost 13 - nuff said. She is having more and more hormonal meltdowns complete with tears and irrational thinking. Yes,Mother Nature is just around the corner and she is already practicing PMS. I was just wondering if any of you who have bravely gone before have any suggestions. I find Estroven does me wonders. Are there any natural suppliments that can be helpful for a kiddo on the estrogen roller coaster? Any suggestions of any kind? Sedation darts are out of the question - but could become a consideration by 15 if we don't make some emotional progress before then.

I'm open to suggestions.

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So What Happened?

Thanks to all who responded! I purchased some B-Complex for both of us. We both felt better soon after taking it. I also discovered she has been skipping breakfast - which is no longer "optional". Regarding the emotional outbursts, her father got the latest blast. He calmly told her that she would get to stay in her room the next day and sit on her bed and think about her behavior. Boredom is the Kryptonite of all teenagers and it worked wonders. I explained that how she responded to the day would determine how she spends the next day making her future her choice. The first half of the day she was really mad. I did not respond to the anger. Instead, I went peacefully about my business. Mid afternoon we talked about how emotions are fine, but how we express them can be a problem. We will gladly talk with her any time she needs us and help her solve her problems, but we will not respond to fits or demands. We recently moved and her brother just graduated leaving her the only child left at home. Changes - even good ones - can throw kids off. She needed some time out to process all the stuff going on in her life. I even had her take a nap and she conked out for about 2 hours. She needed the time of restoration.

We are having her read one chapter of Proverbs a day and then write a brief summary of what she learned and how it applies to her life. There is so much wisdom there and it gives us much to discuss. It is a way to lead her through some of life's tough issues and prepare her mind and heart for wisdom.

By the end of the day she was a new kid. Her sweet spirit is back this morning and she admitted that she learned a few things and the time out was helpful. I know she'll continue to struggle with her emotions (don't we all) but she is learning techniques to handle them in an acceptable form. She also learned that we still love her and we discipline her for her good.

More Answers



answers from Dallas on

PMS is a sign of nutrient deficiencies; mainly calcium, magnesium, omega 3's and the B vitamins.

Look at her diet and add as many raw fruits and veggies you can. Cook a few vegetarian meals, even if you add a meat, because they will contain more veggies and complex grains. Limit soda's (even diet) so they are something 'special'. Try water with fresh lime juice.

For immediate 'relief/results' when she is upset, crying, moody or has cravings, give her a 3-4 B-Complex caplets. B-Complex is water soluble and the extra will be flushed out in her urine which will be bright yellow. When my second daughter was a teen, I'd walk up to her with water and the B's. She'd just take them without question. She'd feel better within 30 minutes. I believe ALL women need B's because we manage stress differently than men.

Recommended Daily Amounts for a Teen:
Multi-vitamin with Iron, one serving per label
Calcium, 1200 mg*
Magnesium, up to 700 mg
Omega 3's, 1000-3000 mg
B-Complex, minimum 2 per day and more based on diet. Take with meals containing sugar and white processed starches or when stress is present. FYI, B's are best taken with all B's present in a balanced amount unless you are treating something specific such as depression or addiction.
* I suggest she take 1/2 her dosage of calcium at night before bed, the rest of the calcium and other nutrients with food.

What Brand?
Try a brand you trust and if you don't see a difference immediately with the B's or for PMS, within 1-2 cycles, switch brands and review the diet!! Recommended Brand (there is a difference), Shaklee.

I have 3 daughters (23, 21, 15) and none of us have PMS when the diet is decent and supplementation is regular. (It's not genetic because we are a combine family). Our cycles last 3-4 days, 1st day is normal flow and days 2 and 3 are lighter and lighter. We are also regular with cycles every 28-29 days.

-I love your sense of humor so she is in good hands in that environment :)!!! Teens CAN bring joy because they are in the mode of discovering themselves and the new interactions of friendships with a wide variety of personalities. There is much pressure at school. The bottom line for me with one of my daughter's that was "tough" was to say "I love you" daily, regardless of her actions and comments. You may not like your daughter's actions or comments at times, but if she knows you love her unconditionally, she'll come around... But good nutrition is a MAJOR help. :)

Blessings and Joy Daily, M.

Note: I am not a doctor and these statements have not been evaluated by the FDA. The products and comments are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease. These words are my opinion based on experience by switching brands several years ago after being on various brands for the previous 23 years.

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Dallas on

Hello L.,

does she drink organic milk? non-organic milk products used to send me on a hormonal rollecoaster. I've seen a differnce enven on 5 year old girls when switching to organic milk. do your own "test". a few days no milk and no soy and then try w/ just milk and then just soy. see if there is any change. the other ladies gave you great advice too. I firmly believe that my daughter's hormonal ups/downs are tightly intertwined and at the same time completely opposite of mine (and she's only six!) Good luck and keep praying. ~C.~

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answers from Dallas on


It sounds like she may be suffering from hormonal imbalance. This is NOT normal, despite conventional medicine's treatment of these kinds of issues as if they are all a normal part of being a woman. When your body is in balance, it funtions normally. This includes emotional balance as well as physical health, regardless of the stage of development you are in. If your body is out of balance, it will suffer symptoms. These could be PMS symptoms at 13 or menopause symptoms at 53. For example, hot flashes are not normal. They are a symptom of a body out of balance. So is PMS. So are mood swings. So are cramps. So is breast tenderness. It really doesn't matter. It is ALL abnormal hormone imbalance. Physicians are woefully inept at helping women bring their bodies back into balance. This is because they rely on drugs, rather than health-producing lifestyle choices. Drugs do not create hormone balance or health for that matter. At best, they do what most drugs do - help you to cope with your imbalanced unhealthy body. Physicians also believe it is normal to have symptoms, when it is not. They really don't set a goal of helping you achieve a symptom-free body. They don't believe it is possible. Accordingly, they ignore early signs of a problem, dismissing your symptoms as "normal", until it gets really bad. They they whip out the drug and surgery options. The fact that many women have the same symptoms does not make it normal. It means that many women suffer from abnormal hormone imbalance. It is also difficult to tell what hormone(s) are out of balance. Doctors miss the boat on this as well. They assume everyone has an estrogen problem. In reality, many women have a progesterone issue. There are many hormones involved in the fascinating function of the female body. That is why it is better to support the body naturally and your body's wisdom will know what hormones to regulate.

You would do her a big favor to help her learn about her body now so she can maintain hormone balance throughout all of the natural and normal transitions of life. You might also learn something of benefit for yourself too! Natural lifestyle changes are what will bring her body back into balance. You could even do some of these together, as a bonding exercise to bring you closer, rather than polarize the two of you. These include a combination of diet, exercise, stress management, proper sleep, minimization of toxin exposure which causes endocrine disruption, etc. Some great books to start with are by Dr. Christiane Northrup. You can get many of her books at Half Price Books. Her principal book is Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom. She also has one on Menopause, and another on Mother Daughter Wisdom. She also has a website with lots of articles. and All of these may be of interest to you!

Another groundbreaking book is What Your Doctor May Not Tell You About Menopause by Dr. John Lee. He blows the whistle on estrogen supplementation.

If you are looking for a local practitioner, Dr. Margaret Christensen, MD is developing quite a following in the metroplex. She does hormone testing, food intolerance testing and also counsels on detox and nutrition and supplement issues. Ask to be put on the waiting list and you might get an appointment.

If you are looking for a website with lots of general health informtion, I like

In my own experience, I was told in my 20s that my backache, long heavy periods, breast tenderness, etc. was all "normal" and to take advil. I did this for many years to cope. It never fixed it. I began practicing yoga. Within a few months, all of my symptoms were gone. It was amazing! Yoga is great for hormone balancing.

Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Dallas on

Hi! I am sure every other Arbonne consultant out there has already answered to your ObGyn and her pediatrician, but I believe girls as young as 11 can start the natural hormone creams. Arbonne has one called Prolief (my hubby calls it my happy cream!) and it has made a huge difference. I have another mom trying it out for her daughter. If you are interested in more info, I would be happy to send that to you. I offer a 35% discount on all orders and free shipping for the first order.


A. Wheeler
Independent Consultant
Regional Vice President
[email protected]

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answers from Dallas on

You may want to try a more natural way to help her. For example, lavender oil- found in whole foods stores- is a relaxant and also a natural way to balance hormones. Put a little bit behind her ears before she goes to bed at night and before she goes to school in the morning. This will keep her calm. Lavender is also good for burns, cuts, rashes, bruises, scrapes, PMS (put a little on the tummy and massage), and headaches.
Im 16 and i went through the same problems-lavender and patchouli helped alot.
Hope this works. :)

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answers from Dallas on

L. - - Your humor had me laughing out loud.

I like the advice from Jean S. and Michelle. I just got this email about this seminar tomorrow night and it could prove timely:

Special One Time Only Event! Health Education Series:
"What Nutrition and Hormones have in Common"


Jim Porter, DPh, RPh, ACN

About Dr. Porter & this one time only Presentation...

Jim Porter, DPh, RPh, ACN is a Doctor of Pharmacy and an Applied Clinical Nutritionist. He utilizes a functional medicine philosophy with most of his suggested protocols. He consults with women and men about natural hormone balance with a emphasis on the role nutrition plays in the outcome. Jim maintains that "hormone interaction with vitamins, and minerals at the cellular level is an astounding life-event, which may be very efficient, or very erratic, in its ability to balance our hormones"

Jim is a pioneer in the field of natural hormones, with over 25 years of experience. Jim is the owner of Pharmacy Compounding Specialties, located in North Dallas. He actively consults with thousands of patients helping them in their quest for well-being and balance. Nutritional and Natural Hormone replacement therapy recommendations are provided through in-depth one-on-one consultations. He has had many success stories by incorporating the whole food approach. He is dedicated to recommending complementary and alternative care solutions in disease management; a blend of allopathic and complementary medicine options.

Tuesday, June 3rd 2008
6 PM Dinner (order off menu & pay)
7-8 pm FREE Presentation

Capriccio Ristorante
420 Parker Square (off 1171)
Flower Mound, Texas 75028

Please RVSP by Saturday, May 31st at

NOTE: this seminar is open to the public, please feel free to invite friends, neighbors & loved ones. If there is any way you can be there, get'll be glad you did! RVSP soon, space is limited.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Dallas on

If you find out anything, let me know. I have a 13-1/2 year old that started her cycle 5 months ago. We haven't had to much of the crying jaggs, but the moodiness is sometimes out of control around her time of the month.
I really feel for my husband and son.
Good luck!
Jen D.-Frisco

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