Help at Bedtime

Updated on April 27, 2007
J.H. asks from Dexter, MI
7 answers


My son who will be 2 the begining of May is in a habit that for bedtime we curl up in an oversized arm chair in his room, he has a sippy cup of milk and then when he falls asleep I put him to bed. For about 2 weeks he got to the point where he would sit in the front room with me and have a drink in our rocking chair then would want to go to bed on his own and did excellent, but now he has regressed back to wanting to be in his room with me before he falls asleep otherwise he throws a fit. I don't know what to do. He is still in a crib, but pretty close to ready for me to convert his bed into a toddler bed. Any suggestions for a smoother night time routine?


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answers from Detroit on

Hi. Well I can't help with the bed thing But noticed another problem. Giving my child a sippy cup of a drink (hers was always juice) before bed, without brushing teeth..well I eventually realized she had "bottle rot" Some teeth were getting a brown spot. The dentist decided it was best to take the teeth- she is now 7 and still no sign of the adult teth! So please be carefull..I also think they say they can get a overbite or something so wean him off it soon. Well, mine wasnt until after the dentist took the teeth.



answers from Detroit on

Hi J., I'm sorry to here that you are having such a hard time with Lucas. I know how frustrating it can be. I am a mother of 19 mo twin girls, and had a rough time with getting them on a good sleeping pattern. I think the most important thiing to be is consistant!! my girls go to bed at 8:00 and sleep til 7:00 without a peep. You have to do the same thing every night so they know what is expected. This is the hard part, you need to put him in his bed, kiss him, and tell him goodnight. He needs to learn that it is bedtime and must go to sleep on his own. IT WILL BE TOUGH.. but the results are worth it. He will cry and cry,, go in his room after 15 min and do the same thing, kiss,,goodnight. it will take some time but he will get it. You will be sooo much happier, and so will he! Remember children only know what we teach them,, and that indeed is what our job as mommy is.. good luck!!!



answers from Saginaw on

I think you just need to go back to sitting in the front room and have him want to go to bed on his own. We did that with our son a few months ago right after we moved him into a toddler bed. We used to rock him to sleep and we got him used to just sitting with one of us and reading a book and then we will take him in his room and put him in bed. I think you just need to be consistant. Even if he cries for a little while when you put him in there you just need to try to stick it out and let him cry. My son will do that once in a while. He will cry for 5 minutes and then fall asleep. Good luck



answers from Las Vegas on

Hi J.
Why not go back to the routine that Lucas is used to. In my opinion, the cry-it-out theory is a heart breaker. I've tried it and hated it! Creating a more peaceful home is a happier home for everybody in the house. Let him have his overstuffed chair in his room with his sippy cup, and maybe add a book to the routine as well. It takes a child 2 weeks to establish a routine as a habit. Children love routine. They need to know what to expect and when to expect it.

Sometimes toddlers do a 'push-pull' with their newly found independence. They push momma away to discover themselves, then pull momma back in for a little added security. Lucas will return back to his big boy routine when he is ready.

Best of Luck!! Heidi



answers from Jackson on

Hey J.-
I'm not sure if you are familiar with the "Baby Wise" books, but they have been a huge help for my family. I have a 9yr old, an 8yr old, a 2yr old, and a 6month old. I learned with my 9, and 8yr olds what not to do with the new little ones. My advice and this may sound horrible, is to just let him throw a fit while he's still in his crib. I know it's heart breaking, but if you truly want to break the habbit for good I think it will work. If he is still upset after 20 minutes, go in give him a kiss and hug(without getting him out of the crib) and tell him it's bed time. It may still be a few days before he lays down with out throwing a fit, but if you do this now he'll most likely go back to the smoother bed time routine you mentioned and his toddler bed in no time.



answers from Detroit on

My daughter is 3 1/2 and we still hold her every night in the front room and she will fall alseep in our arms and I would have it no other way! My oldest is 12 1/2 and they grow up soooo fast. He doesn't even want us to kiss him good night anymore. So my advice would be to hold him as long as you can! I never understood the whole thing of kids having to go to sleep by themselves I don't like going to sleep by myself. I never had schedules with any of my kids. :)



answers from Detroit on

I have a 2 1/2 year old son name Lucas too. We also sat with him in the front room until he fell asleep. In January we switched to a toddler bed because he had started to climb out of it. We sit with him until he falls asleep and it usually takes about a 1/2 hour. Tonight for the first time I put him to bed sat with him a few minutes and left the room--he is sound asleep right now.

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