Help! Any Suggestions on How to Ween a Toddler??

My PAT advisor has five children, her mother had six and she swears by lemon juice on the nipple. I have not tried this since DD is 10 months and down to one comfort feeding before bed. She claims that it worked for 11 children.

The idea is she will latch, the taste will be bitter and she alone will decide to wean. Guiltless weaning! Again, I haven't tried it, but plan to at a year with DD.

Hi,

When I was weaning my daughter, I found a sippy cup at walmart that had a lid that felt like a bottle and was shaped like a sippy cup. We weaned her off of me and the bottle with that. She thought it was a bottle, so we then weaned her off of that with a cup with a straw in it. She liked the idea of drinking out of a straw, because she saw us do it. So, at bedtime and naptime I would just give a cup of milk with a lid and straw. It worked wonderfully. I haven't had a problem since.

Good luck to you!!

I could have written your post! My DS is also 23 months old, will be 2 Feb 17. Also still nursing at just nap and bedtime, and we co-sleep. I would like to get him into his own bed soon as well. No advise just (((HUGS)).

My son is 1 and I am in the weening process myself started when he was 8months old, I cut out the mid morning one did that for a week, I sat on the floor and played with him or gave him a drink from a sippy cup and a snack. same thing with the afternoon feeding, (gotta be consistent) I gradually cut out the morning one, ya need to do it slow and not all at once, if done at once you could get engorged and it will be very painful. I only nurse my son once in the afternoon then before bed.

Good luck
HOpe that helps
G.

Hi S.,
We have four children, that also slept with us while they were nursing, and it wasn't until the last two that we discovered a "weening" technique that worked like a charm for us-- maybe it will work for you!
As I'm sure you noticed, the baby nurses on and off during the night. It's not a hunger thing, it's a comfort thing. They toss a little in their sleep, smell you right next to them and automatically latch on - nurse for 15 seconds, and fall back to sleep. So during the night, my husband had the baby sleep next to HIM, instead of inbetween the two of us.
Then when the baby would toss and start searching for the breast unsuccessfully, believe it or not, they usually fell back to sleep. I think it's because they weren't actually "awake" in the first place-- they were still asleep, just in a "lighter" stage of sleep, starting to toss a little.
We our last 2 children, this worked amazingly well and only took a week. If your toddler were to actually wake up, start to cry, and didn't settle down pretty quickly, Daddy can always take the toddler into another room, cuddle on the couch and see if he can settle the baby back to sleep himself.

I can't give you any advice ...I just wanted to tell you your not alone....Thats the story of my life right now except I have a little boy. He'll be 2 March 18th. I just can't bring myself to stop nursing. He does sleep in his own bed (its a queen size futon in his room) the problem is Isleep most nights in there with him. someday........

My son was about 30mo when he weaned. I just made the sessions shorter and shorter before phasing them out. 10 mins went to 8 then 5 then 2... We continued co-sleeping without any problems. Email me if you need anything else - ____@____.com
~R.

Put your foot down with her.I know it is hard but the more you give in the harder.I had to ween my 18 month old with weight problems and it was very hard because he would not drink milk from a cup.
My suggestion is tell her that she is a big girl now and big girls have to drink from a cup.Once you tell her no more make sure you don't let up.Let her go pick some sippy cups.My son will only drink milk out of a straw cup.She may have a couple weeks where she won't drink as much.I know my son did but I stood my ground and he did better than I did!You could get her a "special" sippy cup.Also you could tell her if she drinks from a cup then she will get a suprise.Then reward her when she is sucessful.
As for the bed thing.We told my daughter that if she came in Mommy and Daddy's room she could not get in our bed.It was our bed and she had her own.There was not room and if she slepted in there she had to lay in the floor.She did just that for a while then we gradually went to her bed.if you don't want her in your room,make a big deal when she sleeps all night in her room.Tell her how big she is and how proud you are.We had to let her fall asleep in our room sometimes and then take her to her room.Then if she didn't get up again she got praise.That's a bad habbit too though.
I hope this has helped,good luck! Sicerly,C.

I am sorry that is just way to old to be nursing. I think you just stop. she should be using a cup. most kids use cup before they are 1.and you tell her that she is a big girl and she needs to use a cup. let her go pick some out. and make a big deal about to her. I feel when the walk up to you and point to you breast and say I need a drink it is to old. Sorry if I sound harsh but I feel it time to time.

Good luck. you need the break too. not just her.

S.,

Hey my daughter was the exact same way. I only began to try and wean her when I got pregnant with my son and she was 2 1/2 yrs old. Once I got pregnant, and my best friend who was right along in the same situation would agree with me (we got pregnant with our duaghters and sons at the same time) it just felt odd, like she was just too old all of a sudden. Anyway I just could not get her to wean, she needed it before nightime and naps, and she slept (and still does- tho she will sleep in her bed no problem if needed or when we want) with us. So I actually rubbed carmex on my nipples at night. I would let her have a little nursing- about 5 min then pull away, rub on the carmex, and lay down next to her again. She was at the point where she would attemp to raise my shirt on her own if she wanted to nurse and I refused. SO when she smelt or tasted that, she would pull her head back and just nuzzle next to it until she fell asleep. SLowly and slowly, she just decided she could do with out the carmex boobie (lol) and just fall asleep next to me, then later on her own totally. It was a miracle i'm telling you because this child would not go to sleep, no matter who had her without nursing, she would fall asleep with my nipple in her mouth and I would have to sneak it out and creep away from whereever I layed her down. Give it a try, might just work for you, too. I felt a little better, too, not upsetting her too much by just telling her no more- but everyone has what works for them. My boy is total opposite, he feeds and pulls off and sleeps on his own, i'm so grateful haha.
C.
25 yrs old mother of 2
3 1/2 yr old daughter Briana
6 mo old son Aidan

p.s. --never had the engorging issue, but then of course i was pregnant, and my supply started lightening. Like i said, she just needed to nurse for the comfort, because i had always let her fall asleep that way, not for the milk at that point. I noticed she didn't always even continually suck. Good luck!

Hi S.,
I am in the process of weaning my 16 month old daughter by shortening our nursing times gradually. She wasn't happy with this at first, but now that I am trying a new routine, she is doing really well with it. The new routine is to give her a warning 20 seconds and then 10 seconds before switching sides and again before we're finished. The warning is just "In 20 seconds, we'll be all done", or something like that. Then, as soon as we're finished, I pick her up, go to a different room, and start doing a different (fun) activity. I haven't had any complaints with this.
I noticed that another mom said she had no trouble continuing co-sleeping after weaning, which is great. My daughter, though, associates certain things with nursing (like the nursing pillow I use), and if she sees those things, then you can't get her mind off of milk. If this is the case for your daughter, too (for example, if your bed is associated with nursing in her mind), you might have to separate nursing from bedtime before you start weaning. You could do this by moving nursing up just 10-15 minutes before bed, and then do some other activity for a few minutes before getting into bed. Good luck!

I finally got my son weaned at 16 1/2 months. He also slept with me and wanted to nurse off and on through the night. I worked occasional part time at night (maybe once a week) so my husband would have to sleep with him at night. He gave him a bottle at night for a little while, but then omited that and would pat his back some and he would finally go back to sleep. I think he slowly got used to not being able to nurse at night but by 3-4 weeks he was totally off the breast. It's very hard to do and not give in, but if you're ready to do it and you stick with it then it can be done. I didn't feel like I was being mean or torturing him. He would still raise my shirt and want to nurse but I would try to redirect him with a cup or food. Now he's 19 months and has totally forgotten my breast. A month after that I started putting him in his own bed. He actually did well and sleeps better in his own bed. Good luck! I hope you find something that works for you!

Well you already know what I think! I love you sis! Hope someone else can help!

She needs her own bed. If it makes it easier at first, try a playpen she cannot get out of on her own. It can be placed by the bed so she is reassured you are there but not allowed to nurse. She can have a sippy cup like "a big girl." They make ones with soft nipples but sturdy enough for a 2-year-old.

She will cry and pout. You will go without a good night of sleep for awhile, but she will adjust. In the long run, it is what is best for her.

They have toddler beds that are very decorative and soft once the playpen is outgrown. She will mature if you let her. I know it is easier to give in when you are tired, but you will regret it if you don't stop this now.

All these Moms have great suggestions, but please don't give your child a sippy cup in bed, especially with milk in it. It causes the worst tooth decay. And there is a definite choking dange r with any liquid in a bottle or sippy cup in bed.

My daughter was my hardest to wean. I weaned my boys at 16 months and 13 months respectively and the only reason I did was because I was halfway or more through pregnancy for the next baby. My daughter was weaned at 20 months (5 months ago) and I had to do it because I just felt it was time. We had already been nursing only at nap and bedtime like you. Then one day I told her that she is getting to be a big girl and it is time for us to stop nursing at nap time. I told her I would still nurse her at bedtime. When I told her this she got a bit teary eyed with a quivering lip and asked "but why". I just explained it to her again and told her how much I love her and am here for her. I also told her she can have a water cup in her bed. Day one of no nap nursing was hard because after I did our routine and placed her in bed she started to cry and say "no, go there" as she pointed to the rocking chair. I told her I will offer her another great big hug but it is time to say night night. She weeped while we hugged then I had her take a deep breath and told her it was now time for a good rest. She went right to sleep in her bed. Day 2 we did our routine and again as I layed her in her bed, she pointed to the rocking chair and indicated she wanted to go there again. I again told her I would nurse her at night when the sun goes to bed but not at naptime. She didn't even cry, but whimpered a bit as we talked about it and she seemed to again feel better after having a nice hug from me. Day 3, she didn't ask and she went right to sleep. On those nights she vigorously nursed at bedtime and after nursing double the normal amount of time I had to break suction and give her the 2 minute warning of saying night night to nursing and going to bed. My supply really started to drop so it began to hurt. I had intended on at least giving it a week of no naptime nursing only before totally weaning, but my supply was dropping more and it became less comfy for me and more frustrating for her as well since she was sucking hard with not much success. So I told her it was now time to stop our night time nursing as well. I told her I would spend extra time with her. She loves hair, mostly just holding it and stroking it, so I told her she could snuggle close to me and hold my hair while I read a couple of extra stories with her. She really liked that. On that 1st night she started to cry when I put her in her bed and I picked her up and comforted her telling her what a big girl she is and how much I love her. I showed her the cup of water left in her bed and if she needed a drink it was there for her. I also again let her know I was just in the other room if she needed me. I put her back in her bed, kissed her, said goodnight and I haven't heard a peep out of her about it. She follows her routine beautifully and goes right to bed every time unless she has been sick (which has been rarely). She sleeps 10.5 hours at night (if my boys go wake her in the morning which they most always do) otherwise she will sleep 13 hours. She still takes a 2-3 hour afternoon nap. My routine is excruciatingly boring so the kids know exactly what to expect as far as when we eat and sleep. We do different activities daily. So that is how I weaned my 20 month old daughter.

However you have a different issue on your hands. You still have to get her in her own bed, which I think logically must come before weaning. I wouldn't recommend going too fast. Go with the flow of what feels right for both of you. If she takes the transition well and is tolerating it, by all means progress. I would start with moving her to her bed. When you do this and establish her bed, she will still have the closeness of nursing so it isn't so much of a tear apart. After she likes staying in her own bed (which at this age, could take a while of getting use to), then you should attack the nursing. Good luck. I know it isn't an easy task, but you can do it. Just be sensitive to her while keeping control of the situation. If you waiver emotionally, she will pick up on it, not take you seriously and the end result will be failure to accomplish the end goal. Be strong, loving, tender and just go for it!

B. :)

I weened my daughter a few months after she turned two, so I don't know for sure if this will work for your daughter....I had had it one morning, my daughter would rather nurse than eat regular food so this particular night she had tried to nurse all night, so upon waking up exhausted from her being on and off all night...I decided this was it...I calmly told her that she was now too old to have mommmy, she needed to eat food from now on. Of course she didn't much care at the time since it wasn't time to sleep yet but that day at nap time I just brought in with us her milk in her sippy cup..made sure that she had a good lunch and wasn't hungry and just laid down with her....and read to her and sang and it was a process but it only took a couple of days before we were down to one short story and she was out.
Its hard at first but if you are firm in your decision and make sure to spend lots of time cuddling its not so bad.
As far as getting her out of the bed, we did it gradually, after she was settled in to the fact that there was going to be no more nursing, I brought her crib mattress in and laid it on the floor next to the bed and made it up like a lil bed and just started reading to her there and putting her to sleep there (having a cd player in there really helped to...we put on some soft accoustical guitar music). Once she started going to sleep really well there...we waited a couple of months....then we got her a twin bed for her room and "graduated" her to that and for the first few months I would lay in there with her if she didn't fall immediately asleep after reading. Anyway I hope some of this will help you, we didn't rush anything (we went real slow, but it was really easy that way too) Good Luck!