Help! 4 Year Old and 6 Year Old Birthday Party Same Day. Need Advise, Ideas

Updated on November 06, 2009
J.K. asks from Mansfield, OH
16 answers

My daughters birthday is the same day but 2 years apart. They each want their own theme and friends invited so I'm looking a 2 seperate parties on the same day! My 4 year old wants Mickey Mouse clubhouse and my 6 year old wants hannah montana. My older daughter's friends are mostly 7 and my younger daughters friends range from 2 to 4. I don't see how I can keep older kids and younger kids happy at the same time. Any suggustions or ideas? I've talked to the girls about games and the ones my 6 yr old wants the little kids would not be able to do or want to and the 4yr old wants games that the older kids would not really be intersted in. I can't run 2 seperate party games at the same time but I don't want to really have 2 totally seperate parties. There has to be an easier way. Any ideas? Thanks... the party is in December so I have a little time.

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So What Happened?

OK- update! Thanks all of you for your responses.... just to give a bit more details! I originally planned on only one of them getting a party this year (the youngest becasue it is her first year in school with "friends" and her sister has had many friend parties!) But my husband banished the idea of rotating years because our son who is older than the girls gets to have a party or whatever he choose EVERY birthday. So each girl will get to celebrate thier birthday with friends every year... dads law. We have a HUGE family (immediate family i mean) with many many many children (my husband is the oldest of 10 kids... his youngest sister is 8)between the age of 2 and 15 so our parties are way to big to have at home without friends! Also to big to go to someplace like chucke cheese or bowling because we are looking at hundreds of $$ for a party that way.
My girls do not mind sharing a party but they do mind sharing themes and having to make friends play games they will not enjoy or "get"
I rented a community room in our town ($50 for the day) so I can have all day for these parties but I can't pull for 2 days and my husband normally works 7 days a week so he would only be willing to take off one day! I can't saddle myself to only one girl and my husband to another because then we are missing the other childs party see.... so. As many ideas flying around as possible would be great but that is where I am coming from.
THANKS AGAIN for all the replies!!

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answers from Cincinnati on

Have the six-year-old friends come first (keep the number small). Let their party be to set up, decorate for the 4-year-olds; then let them run the games and serve the refreshments (cake with both names on it). Six-year-olds love to be the boss(es)! I would say 3 or 4 friends each is sufficient. You could have a separate activity or game for the older girls before they begin the set-up part, or at the end. All can join in on the clean-up! And open play time at the end is good, too. And a thank-you novelty when they leave would be nice.



answers from Canton on

You could have a Carnival theme party. send out invites with tickets and you could just have all the carnival games like ring the bottles, bean bag toss in laundry basket, pin the nose on the clown, pull the duck out of the pond, just some creative ideas from what a carnival or fair would have and you could make hotdogs, hot pretzels, sno cones, and popcorn. You could have a ticket booth, you or someone you know could dress up like a clown, it is really fun. I had one for my twins who are a boy and a girl and it was perfect. You could adjust some games to the ages and everyone could have fun.

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answers from Indianapolis on

I didn't read other responses so someone may have already said this. You need to let them have seperate parties, they are two different ages and two different people. What about having one Fri eve other on Sat. Or one on Sat. and one Sunday. Yes, then the debate is who gets to go first well then put their names in a hat have dad or someone other than them or you pull it out and that's who goes first this year, then alternate from there. Obviously one is going to get upset about not being first, but that's alot better than trying to run two parties on one day and I think more safe. Your kids are still at an age that parties need to be monitored and you can't do that if you're having two at once. Then if someone would get hurt I don't think parents would be to happy about that. Also, some parents may not let their kids come, especially the little ones, if they hear you're trying to do two parties at one time.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Columbus on

You could go somewhere where you can rent two rooms at the same time (ie Grader's here in Columbus)... or move one party to another day (shocking thought, i know:)



answers from Cleveland on

If it were me, I would just have one party. I know they want to have their "own" parties and are 2 individuals, but obviously having 2 parties is a burden. And who is the parent anyway? I would tell them they are having one party. maybe the younger kids can play in another area. Have 2 smaller cakes instead of one large one. maybe they can even learn to compromise on a theme or you can just have 2 sets of plates, one for each group. Personally I would just do a generic theme in their fave colors or something. That would make it easier and save money too!

Good luck!!



answers from Cleveland on

My sister and I share a birthday. There are 4 years difference in our ages.
We are adults now and I have to say I feel so fortunate to always have someone to share my birthday with.

As children we had "family " birthday parties and we would each be allowed to invite one or two friends to celebrate with us if we wanted. The party consisted of ice cream and cake and everyone sang happy birthday then we opened our presents.
I pretty much do the same thing for my kids, although I will let them have a friend or two over for a sleepover for the birthday, although they have to pick a day other than the actual birthday, because that is a family day.

I really don't understand why so many moms spend a fortune on elaborate birthday parties for little kids. By the time they turn 16 they feel they are entitled to a new car just because they exist.

You could choose to honor one child with a party (to which the sister would also be invited) this year and let the other one be the honoree next year.



answers from Cincinnati on

My sister's birthday was the day before mine and her 2 oldest boys have the same birthday. We always resented that we had to share a birthday cake - let alone a party. As a result my sister would make a 2 layer cake and decorate each layer separately - 1 for each boy. At lunch they would sing Happy Birthday and celebrate one and at dinner they'd do the other. Each had his own cake and his own celebration time. She never did the big "party" thing. Each boy got to take a few friends (4 or 5) to do something special (go to a movie, go bowling, go to Chuck E Cheese, play laser tag,...)

For now - the 2 year old most likely won't remember this birthday let alone a party (they're pretty oblivious before 3). They don't need a "party."

The 4 year old, however, will remember and you are probably dealing with that competitive party thing that seems to rear its ugly head in the pre-school social scene. Keep it simple and everyone will be happier.



answers from Cincinnati on

I met this person's mom at an event I did a week ago. The Direct Selling product is Noah's Ark. I have a perfect idea for all the girls to do with one theme. They have a Bella Bee glamour girls workshop. The girls learn the importance of Beauty on the inside and Glam it up on the outside,have fun with glitter and shine products. Party package starts at $17 per girl, and if they want to make a stuffed bear etc. that is another $18 each.

I am trying to consider this with less girls. My daughter will be 6 in Jan. Normally , I would have 6 girls, but that is a bit much . Think about it.

Good luck.

Here is the contact information: They come to your house.

Kelly Flake
[email protected]



answers from Nashville on

Could you ask your soon to be 8 year old to pick another day?

A a theme/family party for your 4 year old and a skating or bowling party another day for your older daughter with a few friends.



answers from Terre Haute on

If you have the room for the entire day then why not have 2 parties on the same day, with a 2 hour break in between? Explain to the girls that they can each have their own theme, guests, activities, but that to save money you aren't getting two completely different set ups. Go with plain plates, decorations, table coverings and such, and just get the cake and pinata and gift bags for each girl theme specific. Then all you have to do is decorate in the morning and then swap out the cakes, pinatas and gift bags. Your family should be willing to attend both, or will at least see both girls even if they only come for one time slot, and if you have your husband take them out for lunch while you and some helpers clean up and replenish the supplies you should be able to make it a smooth day.
I have a step-sister who is 2 years younger and our birthdays are 7 days apart, which led to several joint birthdays, which I hated because it always seemed like they just added my name to her cake and invited my grandma so it would be my party too. Each child deserves to have their special day, so you can either have one long day, or do one child's party the weekend before, and the other party the weekend after.



answers from Columbus on

Personally, I would have 1 on Saturday and 1 on Sunday. It is too much to try with those age groups. In the future, you can rotate years. My boys get a "friend" party every other year - and they go opposite years so we only do 1 big party. They always get a "family" get together. The off year for the party they get to invite 1 friend to do something fun. (water park, sleepover, bowling)



answers from Memphis on

well do it like they do it at disney world when they put it all in one they are both disney stars so do a disney wonderland with just hannah montana and mickey club house also happy birthday to both girls

-C. a



answers from Indianapolis on

My 2 oldest children are 3 years and 2 days apart. We had combined birthday parties until last year when they requested separate ones (boy and girl - so very understandable). We have 2 parties on 2 different days - 1 on Saturday afternoon, 1 on Sunday afternoon. I don't know too many people who have their party on their actual birthday so it's not a big deal... we've never had or gone to a mid-week party!

Since your girls are closer in age, a combined party would work pretty well. You don't need organized games for them yet... my oldest just turned 7 and this is the 1st year we had organized games at his party. The kids have alot of fun just running around playing. You can have 2 sets of games... just enlist the help of another parent or your husband to run the games for 1 set of kids. Most parents of 2-4 year olds will stay at the party because (at least around here) drop-off parties don't start until kindergarten - age 5.

As for party theme and such... have 2 tables set up, one decorated with Hannah Montana and the other with Mickey. Also decorate the tables to keep the gifts on to make it easy to keep them separated.

Another option is not have it at your house, although the cost skyrockets at that time (our parties rarely go more than $40-$50 for 10-15 kids). A place like Monkey Joe's would be perfect... all the kids will love it and be entertained by running around and jumping and you won't have to worry about games.

Personally, though... if they request separate parties you should give them separate parties. That makes it more special to them... not too many kids prefer to share the spotlight of a birthday party with a sibling -- even twins and triplets I know get separate parties!



answers from Columbus on

well, i wish i could be of some help as far as the actually planning of both parties (or joint themed party) goes, if you need a really great cake, or cakes lol, let me know, i do great deals for tight budgets. good luck with the girls birthdays, im sure youll pull it together, super moms always do!



answers from Columbus on

Sounds stressful.. here is an idea from watching my sister. She has three daughters all with birthdays in the same month. As such, she has a family party on one day - the family likes this better as well! Then, she lets them have a friend party with a couple of friends and they either have it at the house or go somewhere.



answers from Indianapolis on

Do you not have a friend or family member who can help with games, etc. for each of these groups? I would do the cake & ice cream, etc. TOGETHER. Find one or two things that both groups can do and then have someone work/supervise one group and one the other. NOW.....if I were in your shoes, I'd NOT be charge of EITHER group. Otherwise, you'll end up spending more time, etc. with that group.

It will be EASIER to work with smaller groups. There is no doubt in my mind that this can work. You just have to PLAN - activities, space, transition, etc. I would start and end together. Let me know if you need more details or help.

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