He Hates His Pencil!

Hi C.,
Well, there are few things you can do, that on the surface don't appear to be for writing, however they are exactly for improving writing and fine-motor skills. Tina is absolutely correct in saying to strengthen gross motor skills too. Here are a few other ideas:
1. Have him write on vertical and horizontal surfaces-- chalkboard, white board, etc. He will probably enjoy markers/chalk before pencils. You can pre-draw lines (vertical line, horizontal line, diagonal lines, "V" strokes, circles, "X" marks, etc. to give him something to write purposely, however, make it fun...low pressure at this point. As long as he is moving his arms and hands, he is working.
2. Have him use push pins...under close supervision. Give him either paper, cardboard, cardstock..the thicker the paper the more it works his skills, draw or have a design preprinted, and let him lay on carpet or a carpet square and use the pushpin to poke holes on the line of the design. He can turn over the paper and see the light coming through. They usually love this. The push pin is small enough to force a pincer grasp which he will need for writing with a pencil. I have used the Jumbo push pins and then moved the child down to the normal small sized.
3. Tape a color page or paper under a table...let him color laying on a pillow looking up at the paper that is taped on the under side of the table...great for shoulder and arm stability and usually they think they are getting away with something.
4. Have him write on sandpaper/boxes...any different surface.
5. Put shaving cream on the table and let him make designs and letters, etc. using the pencil...eraser down, or just his fingers. Shaving cream is great for cleaning your table...kids love the sensory aspect as well.
5. Keep it low pressure and fun. You are right, most lil' boys are not ready to sit and work at 3. That means we have to make it fun and interesting. If it is stressful and not fun, he will hate doing it, shut down, and it will take SO MUCH longer to get him to join in and learn once he does get to a maturity level of being interested. Make sure he has had some physical activity before asking him to sit and work...that usually will help.

Let me know if you need other ideas...right now that is all I can remember doing when I taught a preschoolers with disabilities class....make it fun...for both of your sakes.

K.

There really isn't too much that you can do to encourage him at this point. My son (almost 5) is in a Pre-K (4) class right now and they just started working on writing their names after Christmas. (I just went to a kindergarten program that said they don't even start it there until the second half of the year also)

My son was way behind in fine motor and went to therapy for it last year. They said they have to develop their big muscles before the little ones. If you think he may have poor upper body strength, it would probably be more beneficial to work on that at his age. Have him hang from a bar or wheelbarrow him around the house. Anything that will help his hand,arm or upper body strength. For fine motor do those puzzles where they have to "fish" with a magnet, lace a card or thread beads. These sort of exercises will do much more for him than the workbooks.

Good luck!!

You said, "I know that a lot of the problem may be that he is not ready to write yet." As the parent of a 5 year old boy, I would like to respectfully submit that this is probably the entire problem! My son didn't even want to color at 3, let alone write, while my daughter (who is 2) is already loving to color - nothing more than "scribble scrabble," but she loves it! I was using a highly-recommended school prep program when my son was three and ended up dropping it completely and switching to a literature-based Pre-K homeschool program with no pre-writing at all (at the recommendation of several friends), because the pre-writing stuff was such an issue. I was warned that if I pushed it before he was ready he would learn to hate it, but if I waited until he was ready he WOULD learn to write! Now, at a young 5 years old and in Pre-K, my son is doing fine with writing and seems to like it.

If the school where your son attends really forces the writing issue so early and is making an issue out of it, perhaps he needs a different program. If it's just that you're worried about next year, don't be...when he has the motor skills (and possibly a bit more maturity to be able to sit still), writing will probably not be nearly the big deal that it is now. And if he is a really "young 3" now, he won't be in Pre-K for two more years anyway (he will need to be 4 by September 1 to be in Pre-K here in TX). My son's birthday is in September and it has turned out to be a blessing - he turned 5 in September and is one of the oldest kids in his Pre-K class, but that means his motor skills have caught up with where they need to be to excel in Pre-K.

Just my $.02.

B.

My son, also 3, doesn't like pencils much, but LOVES markers. I've gotten the washable markers and he likes them. They're bigger and he can hold them better.
I understand and agree that he might not be ready, but if they're doing it in his class, then he might also want to be like the other kids. I know my son will do much more with the other kids than he will to for me. I also found a site that lets you type in something that they can trace! My son loves it! www.my-moondrops.com and www.kidzone.ws/tracers Hope they help!

What about making writing fun by writing with soap crayons... I think they still make them ( I loved them!) Give him big crayons in the tub - he can write on the walls and practice his letters at the same time as bath play time..?

My advice would be.....he's 3! Relax...

My son, in pre-k, didn't like to write or color. He was much more into the manipulatives and imaginitive play. He's now in third grade, and scored 100% on the district reading/writing assessments.

Let him develop at his own pace. You might see other kids who are loving writing at that age. It may be something that develops later for him. Rushing him will only lead to resentment and resistance. It would be different if he were in the middle of kindergarten still refusing to write, but he's very, very young. My advice is to relax, and let him focus on what interests him. If he likes the fine motor exercises, let him do those to strengthen his fingers; when he's ready, he'll do it.

You have gotten some great responses. I am a preschool teacher and I can tell you that at 3 years old in our preschool, writing is left up to which students want to write and which don't. I would focus more on building his fine motor skills and his hand muscles. Play dough is an excellent tool for building muscles as well as lacing cards. Working puzzles will build his fine motor skills as well. If you want him to write, a pencil may be too small for him right now. Try the big crayons or anything that is bigger around. That will be easier for him to handle until he gets his muscles built up. There are a lot of great ideas being sent around but I think you shouldn't worry right now. When he is ready, he will. Take care and good luck!!!