Having Problem with Fiance Still on Exwife's Mortgage.

My divorce was final this past October. I am still on the mortgage and he makes the payments. He has one year to refinance (from the date we signed the divorce papers) - if, after a year, he is unable to refinance, he then has to get my permission to take another year to try to refi. If at that time he cannot he must sell.

I do think all finances should be in order prior to getting married - my opinion, not anyone elses. Best of luck.

It was part of our decree that I had six months to refinance my home or I was required to sell it. Pretty standard language in the decree so perhaps he should start there.

Welcome to mamapedia, M.!

In cases of divorce, the papers are VERY clear in what will be done with the property, just like with child custody.

He needs to pull out his divorce paperwork and read it over VERY carefully and then go to his lawyer that did the divorce papers. He needs to ensure his name is off the mortgage.

Good luck!

When you sign a deed over in the divorce, the papers most likely say "wife will try to refinance" which means, she will try to remove his name from the mortgage. No court has the authority to order the bank to refinance, this is the banks final decision. He can see a lawyer, but if the exwife can not refinance, he's stuck.

In my divorce I had to refinance the mortgage to remove his name and relieve him of his responsibility. Signing the deed over does not change anything legally.

I don't understand what you mean when you say his farm is mortgaged against her house. If you mean his name was on both mortgages and he has refinanced the farm and she hasn't refinanced the house to take his name off the house his farm is clear and legally owned only by him while he is still on the house mortgage. If his ex's name is not on the farm mortgage he will not necessarily lose the farm if the house goes into foreclosure. And there are several ways to prevent foreclosure. Yes, he is still responsible for the loan. That does not mean he will be ruined financially. It does mean he has to continue having a good relationship with his ex. Even if his name is not on the mortgage he will need to continue having a good relationship with her. She is a part of his life until the children are grown.

Please remember that what he does in his divorce was decided before you were in the picture. He has, no doubt, have reasons why he's handling what was once communal property. If children are involved he has to consider what is best for them. I also suggest that he knows his ex can be trusted. If I were him I would resent your ultimatum. It says to me that you don't trust him. If you don't trust him then of course you should not marry him.

I suggest you find a way to discuss this situation in a calm way without accusing him of anything. Work together to find a way that is acceptable to both of you. If the two of you can't do that both of you are not ready for marriage. There will be many issues on which you will not agree. A successful relationship requires trust and the ability to work together to solve problems.

I agree that getting his name off the mortgage is best. However doing so is not an easy decision to make.

Added: i'm still paying for my house. I don't have a deed. I won't get one until the mortgage is paid off. A deed is a legal document saying you own the house. Until the mortgage is paid off the mortgage company has a legal claim to the property. Foreclosure illustrates this. The company takes the house in lieu of payments. They sell the house. If there is money remaining after the mortgage is paid off The person who bought the house gets the remainder.

You do need to consult a realesstate attorney. It's my belief that your husband would not lose the farm. It would negatively affect his credit score. You need to know how having his name on the mortgage would affect him based on his situation.

Well removing the name from the deed is different then the mortgage. Example: I am on the deed to my house with my husband, but I am not on the mortgage (since I am a SAHM it was better to not add me).

I would look into the divorce decree regarding this matter. It probably states that she should have had to refinance the mortgage when he was removed from the deed. When my husband got divorced his name was also on the loan, she refinanced a few years after their divorce and got him removed from it.

Doesn't sound like she is a bad person, but if something happened to her your husband is responsible for the loan and if it defaults it could effect both of you if you marry. Not only would her home get foreclosed, the farm might too.

He should talk to her about getting this done prior to you getting married.

Your question actually has 2 issues in it.

1 - He is on the ex's mortgage but not on the deed.

Worst case scenario is that she stops paying and he has to start, even though he doesn't own any interest in the property.

2 - "his farm is still mortgaged againt his exwife's home"

Do you mean that part of the collateral for the ex's house is the farm he currently owns?

If so, the worse case scenario if she stops paying and he can't afford to pay is that he loses his farm. Even if she personally defaults he can't even force the ex to sell the house to try to negate the loan because he doesn't own the house.

What needs to happen next is combing though the divorce papers.

If the decree says she needs to refinance as a condition of keeping the home, then he can pursue it. If she is unable to refinance, then she will probably have to sell.

If the divorce decree did not require her to refinance the home into her own name only, your fiance has no legal grounds now to make that happen.

Honestly, if everything is going smoothly now and they have an amicable relationship, another option is to just let things stand as they are. He should consult a lawyer about any ramifications to doing that.

As for your marriage, have a pre-nup so that what's yours remains yours, and his remains his. That way you won't personally be stuck with any financial burden if things go south.

You can "state" all the bills you want in the divorce decree, however, the creditor does NOT have to honor that and can go after either one or both for repayment of the debt. As for the mortgage, she has to re-finance to get his name off. I don't know if she can be forced to do that - I would check with an attorney. But if she tries and does not qualify, then his name will remain on the mortgage.

Here's the thing, she may have tried to refinance and might not have been able to do so. She can't make a lender approve her mortgage.

My ex and I have a Settlement Agreement that is now part of a court order and I can't get the creditors to put the debts in his name only (and we've both tried) and other debts still have his name that I am supposed to be solely responsible for. Luckily, things are civil and we are both making our required payments. He did pay something late and they reduced my credit line (it's not a line I utilize).

Signing the deed over changes ownership of the property but it doesn't take him off the mortgage if he was on it. Two separate things. If they go to the lender together, he may be able to sign off but they don't have to let him.

I would encourage him to get that changed, and probably put it in context of getting all your finances in order as a new couple. I think that his seeing a lawyer is a good step. My husband found out years after the divorce that some paperwork was not changed from his exwife to me, and thankfully he had the chance to change it or she would have stood to get a lot of money. It is good to review these things in preparation for marriage.

Sounds like shoddy divorce work to me. That should all have been addressed during the divorce. And it may have been, but neither of the parties fully acted on or followed through on what they were required/entitled to do.

He needs to pull out those papers and go through them. I'm like Jill K, below.. I'm confused about exactly what you mean with "his farm is still mortgaged againt his exwife's home." Is it collateral on a mortgage he is obligated on (to pay) but he only retains ownership over the farm and not the marital home? He signed off a quit-claim on the house, but still is responsible for the mortgage (which, sounds like maybe, he used the farm as collateral for the loan?)?

Normally, he would be required to sign the quit-claim to the home, but then she would be required to take steps to finance in her name alone (or buy him out, or sell the property) depending upon their financial circumstances and choices.

But, just b/c she may not have refinanced, (whether she is able or not) and chose not to sell (she might have been forced to if she couldn't have gotten her own financing), if he has not moved forward to force the issue, then nobody else is going to pursue her to make it happen.
Maybe he felt she was left in an untenable situation at the time of the divorce and since she has paid as required, he let it go.
But, if it is a condition of your marrying him that he be removed, he'd better dig out those divorce papers and see what they say. They sound amicable. And yes it's a risk against his asset if she fails to pay (for reasons outside of her control, or even if she just wanted to be spiteful).

I think the pre-nup idea would help if you find that he is reluctant to force her to sell her home. Is him being a good guy worth losing him over? I don't know what your/his other financial pictures look like, so I have no idea how big of a deal this really amounts to. It may be that there is little left on the mortgage and it will be paid off relatively quickly and would cost far more in refinancing hassle and loss of an amicable relationship (with the mother of his kids?) than it's worth to him.
I can't say. I don't have that information available just from what you posted.

He needs to review the decree and see if there is anything in there about her removing his name from the mortgage. If there is not, there's not a lot her can do. He can ask her very nicely to remove his name or he could offer to pay closing costs, etc. Legally, he has no rights to the property, but he is 100% responsible for that mortgage if she doesn't pay it.

Reason #3 to have a lawyer during a divorce.

btw, I kept the house and my ex's attorney sucked. She did not include the standard language requiring me to refinance eventhough he has no rights to the property. Financially, it doesn't benefit me to refinance so I haven't.