Has Anyone NOT Breastfed from the Beginning?

I didn't breast feed either of my girls, didn't want to, had no desire to! PROUD OF IT!!!

Your milk will still come in and you will still suffer with engorgement. Have nursing pads for your bra and seriously do not take it off (only to shower). Ice packs will help but it's just a natural part of things. I had no out of the ordinary issues.

You may have to have hubby do the explaining and be very firm about it. Sign the waiver and tell them NOT to bug you about your choice.

Another suggestion: do not keep your baby overnight in the hospital. Use your one night to get a somewhat decent nights sleep. You've got years a head of you to lose sleep, dear.

The hospital lactation consultants can be brutal! My 3rd is 4 months and I did choose to BF and the LC STILL came in and wanted to help. I told her it was my 3rd child--I knew what I was doing--- and basically had to tell her to leave my room! Maybe you can tell your nurse that you do not want to meet with a LC.

Not breastfeeding is NOT the worst thing you can do for your child. A lady I knew from playgroup was PSYCHO about breastfeeding. She would corner moms, etc. Well, she may have bf her kids, but she also screamed at them all the time, spanked them WAY too much, and it seemed as though she rarely bathed them. So, bf does not make you a good or bad parent.

Just a tip: bring a pacifier if you want to use one. Our hospital does not use them--they don't believe in giving them to a newborn. Well, my mom brought some with her when she came to visit, because I do believe in using a paci.

I did not BF my son. My choice. No guilt. The only reason you "need" is that you don't CHOOSE TO.
The nurses at the hospital NEVER questioned my decision. They used to fight over who would feed my baby overnight because he was only O. of a few "bottle" babies.
You milk will still come in but will dry up in a few days.
I had no problems with mastitis, etc.
Remember, the best thing to do is what YOU want to do.

I never breastfed my 7yr old. The nurses asked, I said no...They sent the lactation nurse in to "offer help". I accepted, but not very happily. She then saw that I just didn't want to & left it at that. Your milk will still come in, as that happens naturally upon delivery. I got really engorged, but a friend of mine never nursed, and she was just fine. With me, I dried up completely after I think about 3 days. Just do NOT pump or squeeze or do anything at all to relieve the pain! It may or may not be painful, but if it is, just leave it be, otherwise you will trick your breasts into thinking you are nursing and they will then keep producing!
I would really hope that if you are set on this decision, that the hospital staff will respect your wishes. It is your baby, your body, your decision! You can never be "wrong" for your decisions! I had a lot of negative feedback for not breasfeeding him, but after speaking with a close family friend, I came to realize that, and it was the best advice I received!!
Good luck & congrats on your baby!!

We chose NOT to breastfeed by choice. My husband and I wanted to split feeding 50/50 which isn't possible breastfeeding, not to mention I'm self-employed and if I take time off to pump, the employer losing productivity and money is me. Also, the sickliest people in our family are those who were breastfed (including my dad, who has horrendous allergies and asthma); a long line of healthy bottlefed family members. The hospital where I delivered our son (part of Catholic Healthcare West) wouldn't give me meals because I wasn't breastfeeding when I had to stay with our son in pediatrics! A kind nurse took pity on me and gathered up some leftover food from the breakfasts ... a yogurt and banana, I believe, and brought it for me. I had to smell meals go by and finally realized they weren't giving me anything. Nice. When I called the nurse station, they were very blunt in explaining why I didn't get food. The hospital also sent a team to harass me when our son was in the NICU (at a healthy almost 9 lbs., just had initial breathing problems which breastmilk wouldn't do anything more for than formula). Very, very forceful about breastfeeding. Thankfully, I delivered at Kaiser second time around and they were super about it all. A non-issue that time.

My best advice is be prepared to stand firm in your decision and don't get into your reasoning at all. The pro-breastfeeding people will not listen to your words, so it's a waste of your time to explain. Just tell them you're not breastfeeding and leave it at that. If they press on, say you're not talking about it further.

Also, make sure you'll have your husband or friends or family there at meal time so they can go to the cafeteria to get you food if you don't get any the way I did.

Your milk will definitely come in. I looked like Pamela Anderson wanted another boob job and got another on top of the old one, I looked and felt so ridiculous. Thankfully, it went away after about a week. Just be sure to use the liner pads because you will leak.

Good luck!

I breastfed, but know a lot of mums who had to start chemo on day 1 after birth, and many others on psychiatric drugs that passed through milk, a few with bone disorders/calcium issues that were instructed not to BF under any circumstances, and many women who had undergone surgery (reduction, mastectomy, implants) that made nursing impossible. (Yay the joys of working in a hospital). Add that into the military mamas who were deployed right after giving birth and the number REALLY climbs. (also the joys of being a woman in the military... there's no pumping and FedEx'ing from a combat zone).

Anyhow....

The short answer to all 3 of your q's is "yep".

1) Milk coming in ... Probably. Colostrum - absolutely, Milk - probably. Binding and cabbage leaves help.

2) Engorgement... if your milk comes in... yep. Binding and cabbage leaves help, but binding also increases the risk of mastitis.

3) Mastitis... it's actually possible to get mastitis at ANY time (aka neither nursing nor pregnancy is required), but it's unlikely. Your biggest risk period for mastitis will be in the first month when your milk attempts to come in and the ducts get clogged.

Some women I know go immediately on high dose birth control pills to help stop their milk from coming in... but it's iffy.

And for pushy nurses... here's a phrase:

"Pop quiz... How many medical conditions do you know of that preclude nursing?"

Sorry I'm late responding...

I breastfed my oldest for 3 weeks. I was guilted into it at the hospital. I was ready to say 'bottle feed' and the lactation consultant literally called me a name and said 'feed your child' took him from me and latched him on. It was AWEFUL!!! Then every time I tried he'd fall straight to sleep. They had to start bottle feeding him because he wasn't eating. I wanted to say while still in the hospital just bottle feed him, but hubby said 'you can do this. there are women in fields that pop a kid out, stand up and start feeding with one hand and still picking with the other'. Well after 3 weeks of sleepless torture for both me and my child, and still supplimenting with formula I told my husband I was done. Here's the bottle, here's the baby, I'm going to bed!

With my 2nd I bottle fed the whole way! I gladly signed the 'waiver'. Asked the nurse to notify the lactation consultant to NOT stop by! I'd been there, done that and I wasn't doing it again!'

I LOVED bottle feeding!! Bottle feeding is just like breastfeeding except you can see how much they are getting!! To be prepared, buy about 6 bottles of the 4oz size to start. Also, when you feed in the hospital, they will bring you a sterile nipple and ring for the bottle. Keep the white ring part when you are done with the feeding. These can be washed and reused! The best part about bottle feeding is that Dad and others can take turns and give you a break!!

Yes your milk will still try to come in. Just be sure to wear a tight bra as soon as you get to your regular room. So pack 3-4 bras in your bag. There will still be soreness, but as long as you keep a tight bra on 24/7 for the first few days, you'll get past it. Also, when showering, don't let the warm water run over you for very long. That encourages the 'coming in'.

Good luck. Be strong
M.

I did not BF my oldest at all - well tried 1 x the night I delivered him - nurses didn't help, mom had gone home and hubby was asleep. DISASTER ! So I asked for a bottle - got a little grief - insisted and got strict and me and baby were ALOT happier. My other one - tried to BF a couple of times but he was in NICU and it was hard at times to get there to BF so I just ended up giving bottles. Again - me and baby were alot happier. I fully support whichever way mom wants to feed. It is what works best for mom and baby. So - I think you just need to be strict with the hospital, nurses, and others. Let your pediatrician know ahead of time and that you need them to back you up and support you. If they get a little ugly about it - get ugly back. They need to support you in your decision. As far as your milk - I don't recall my milk coming in at all with my first. A little with the 2nd but no engorgement. It sounds like I just lucked out though. Your baby will do great with bottles and with caring parents like yourselves. Congrats on your new baby !

I did 50/50 for 3 months. COLD cabbage leaves did the trick for me. After delivery, after you are engorged...pump. Level off until putting cold cabbage leaves in until you start to "dry" out....and yes...sudafed will help this process.
I absolutely LOVE that women breastfeed.....I only wish that breastfeeding mothers would LOVE MY decision to fomula feed.
My DD is almost 4 now....doing great!
It was my personal, private desicion that envolves NOONE but my DH and me.

Good Luck to You and your Family!!!

Since I breastfed, I don't know the answers to most of your questions, but I totally support your decision.

The one tip I can give is that, yes, your milk will still come in. Sudafed (the little red pills) should help dry you out ASAP. Check with the pharmacist before you go into the hospital - I'm not sure if it's the new formulation or the old (they switched almost all the cold medicines a few years ago) but one of them should work right away.

Good luck!

Hi,

I won't bash you for not breastfeeding. I am sure you have your reasons and I respect that. I do have to say though that I breastfed both my children 100%--. As far as your milk coming in etc.-it will, but come to the hospital with snug fitting bra that hugs you pretty tight but isn't uncomfortable. You may have a few days of being engorged- ice compresses can help and make sure to keep the bra on all the time. It will go away after a few days. Don't pump or stimulate as that will get your milk going-- good luck to you and one other thing- when you go to the hospital-- tell your nurse and doctor up front that you have done the research and have decided to bottlefeed. This is the best decision for your family and ask them how they can help support you in this decision. Maybe they have formula samples to give at the hospital- could save you alot of $$$ or coupons even. Just be strong in your decision and you could state it in your birth plan if you really want to document it. Good luck to you!

Molly

I tried with my first son and it was nothing but disaster and heartache.

I decided with my second child that there would be no way that I would put myself through hell again and ruled out breastfeeding from the get-go. I put in 4 months of exclusive pumping with my first child, yet he had 8 months of formula - and he turned out just fine.

At the hospital I made it abundantly clear that I would be bottle feeding. When the LC came in to speak to me about nursing, I confidently informed her "I will not be nursing this child. I had an awful, harrowing experience with my first that I don't want to repeat." Of course she tried to guilt me, asking me things like "Well, you know what's going to happen with your breasts right?" all snotty and such. I said, "Of course they'll be engorged for a few days and then after that they'll be fine. Nothing cabbage leaves can't take care of." When she continued to press on I informed her that my firstborn and I had never been happier than on the day we decided to quit the breastfeeding/pumping. She finally got the hint and retreated.

At some hospitals people bring in signs that proudly proclaim "Breastfeeding infant! No pacifiers or bottles!" and you could make your own sign "Bottle feeding only".

You shouldn't have to explain anything to anyone - if they ask simply state that you are bottle feeding. You will become engorged and it will probably hurt for a few days. Holding my child was uncomfortable for maybe a week, and especially bad when the older one (he was almost 3 at the time) would bump into my chest - owie! I did not notice any letdown at all though, with my second child. I leaked a little bit but not much. I had a minor case of mastitis with the first but nothing with the second.

Good luck to you - you and your child will be just fine (despite what some people may think!).

I didn't breastfeed. There are medical reasons, behind why I didn't. Not that I think there has to be, not to. I wore a tight sports bra and a camisole over that, as soon as I was allowed to put on clothing. (after I took a shower) I kept it on for as long as I could without taking it off. I think it was 2 or 3 days. I know that sounds gross, but the less contact, the better. that's why I did it, that way. I made sure there was absolutely zero contact with my breasts. (like brushing up against something, accidentally pushing them into something, etc.) My milk never came in.

I didn't feel the need to get into my medical history, with the nurses and staff. I totally understand how militant they can be, my hospital was with me...at first. I finally said this, "I have chosen not to breastfeed. This was the best choice, for me and my family. It was a personal choice, that I have the right to make. This is my body and you have no authority over it. I do not with to discuss this with anyone, from here on." They left me alone after that. Prepare to be firm, I know I HAD to be.

No one should attempt to make you feel guilty for making the best choice for you and your family.

I chose not to BF. My hospotal visit was torture because the BF'rs would not leave me alone, they were relentless.

My Ob had to step in to get it to stop. The nursery would not give me formula so my husband asked the pedi and he went and bought it. We stopped short of haaving security involved before the BF'rs FINALLY left me alone.

I didn't have any issues with engorging, etc. I guess I was lucky in that way.

BTW....my daughter is a picture of perfect helath, rarely sick, I can count on 1 hand how many time she had had an antibiotic in her 16 yrs.

Congratulations on your new baby.

If anyone asks you why you are not breastfeeding all you need to say is, "That is the decision that I have made." Yes your milk will still come in and you will be uncomfortable for a couple of days. If your mind is made up then it's made up.

well I don't know from personal experience but I had a friend who did zero breast feeding with her second baby. She said the nurses did tell her in the hospital that even just a few days of breast feeding while you have the colostrum is better than none at all. But she just said yes she new that but she still wanted to give the baby a bottle so they did and that was the end of that. She did bind her breast thought to help stop the milk from coming in. I know all woman are different but even if you don't BF at all you will probably still get milk coming in. But she said binding worked great! So you could look into that.

your milk will still come in. My doctor recommended wearing a tight bra, so I wore a bra with a size too small sports bra over it, with nursing pads in. When it hurt too much, I took a warm shower and just let the water run over my breasts, which eased the pain. It took 2-3 days for it to go away.

I did try at first, for about a week, but the baby and I were both miserable, so I'm not sure about in the hospital. Just tell them you're bottle feeding, and have everything ready to go. Make sure your husband is also going to be firm, you're going to be hormonal and tired. We wanted to give our baby a paci, and the lactation consultant put a note in the bassinet not to give a bottle or paci! Just be firm. If you think they're going to give you guff, have other people enlisted to help you. My mom and aunt would be good at this, surely you have friends/family to help.

Yes, yes and yes. I would speak with your doctor and have him note your file that you will be choosing to NOT bf. You may be able to sign whatever docs the hospital requires prior to giving birth. If you are asked by the nurses once you deliver you can kindly ask them to make a big note that you are not bfing.