Has a Very Hard Time Getting My 6 Yr Old Son Out of Bed and off 2 School

Updated on February 07, 2011
B.D. asks from Augusta, GA
17 answers

No matter what i do i cant get my son to get up and get motivated when its time to get up and get ready for school.. Ive tried a sticker chart, sprnkling water on his face, dragging him out of bed etc (which starts enrages his temper and he has a MAJOR tantrum sometimes violent also need to mention he has adhd he takes Vyvanse 50 mg and a few other prescriptions) this is an everyday struggle on school days..he gets 8+ hrs of sleep every night.. Even if i put him in bed at 7:30 and get him up at 6;00 he is still impossible to get up and get dressed.. I turn the tv and the lights on but it still takes too long to get him up and ready for school. and we are rushing to catch the bus at 7:00 also one hr is plenty of time for him to get up get ready and have breakfast before the bus comes at 7.

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So What Happened?

Thanks to everyone for their advice. It was very much appreciated.. My son goes to a program where they have a traffic light poster on the wall with each childs name --green-their behaving, yellow--warning--and red-- time out.. So because he was soo into this and so proud that his name stays on GREEN ALL THE TIME i decided to make one out of poster board and markers.. Ive had it since yesterday and I cant say its perfect but it defintely helps..he loves when he sees his name on green we high five and I give lots and lots of praise! Look at you, youre on green again, Way to Go! Good Job! =)If he is on green at the end of the day he gets a clear gem..after so many gems are earned he gets a suprise..special time with mommy, go to the park, or an allowance..havent really decided yet..we havent got that far yet this is only his second day..

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M.M.

answers from Dallas on

You didn't mention if he is on medication for ADHD. If he gets violent and has MAJOR tantrums, I would hope so. Without knowing if he is on meds, advice really can't be given. Why? B/c the advice would be different for either case.

1 mom found this helpful
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J.K.

answers from Atlanta on

I lie down with my daughter for 2 minutes, rubbing her back, then I pull off the covers and dress her while she's lying down. Then I walk her into the bathroom, brush her hair, and then she brushes her teeth and meets me downstairs.

It's a lot of adult involvement, but it seems to put us in the right "zone" for the day. My mother did this for me as well until I was 12, and I really appreciate that memory of her support for my horrid-non-morningness:)

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K.L.

answers from Redding on

I just checked your previous posts and see you have been having a really difficult time with him, over an extended time. Boy I wish I could just give you a big hug right now. So glad you are seeking advice from us but you really need to go back to your Dr and tell them whats going on. I have never had to deal with ADD or ADHD but a nephew has been on and off meds for his problems and we all saw what a zombie he was on some, and then to everyones delight, what a huge change there was when the right medication was found. Try a differenr Dr if yours won't change the meds. You really need someone to see what's happening with him and give him the help he needs right now. Hang in there M., I'm sure it's really hard for you, but there is help. You just need to find it.

2 moms found this helpful
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J.P.

answers from Los Angeles on

Is he on meds? That can cause those issues. I find that kids with adrenal exhaustion - many diagnosed with ADHD actually have adrenal exhaustion, but not the extent that it will show up on labs until they are adults.

Drenamin 2 in the am and 2 in the pm, as well as liquid calcium/magnesium at night might help.

How is his diet? Does he get plenty of fruits and vegetables? Does he eat things our cans, bags, boxes or drive-thru windows? Does he get enough water? Does he drink soda/juice? Does he eat sugar?

Dietary changes and increased water maybe help a TON. Give it a week or more for his body to naturally detox.

All of my children get 12 hours of sleep and they wake up happy, but if our daughter gets up with 1 or 2 less hours of sleep, she is a nightmere!

1 mom found this helpful
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M.K.

answers from Los Angeles on

LOL to the rubbing of the back, and gently singing the wake up song, just LOL, kids like ours, that kind of stuff drives them mad. that would put my son in a bad mood for the whole day!
The only way to get my son out of bed in the morning is to turn the tv on his fave program or dvd, blasting loud, so he hears it, then he will get up.
I also have a get ready chart on the wall for him to follow, numbered 1-5 such as 1. eat breakfast, 2. get dressed, 3. clean teeth brush hair, 4. if you are ready play the computer, 5. 7.30 we leave. if he gets ready well before we have to leave he can play the computer until we leave - bribery is king in our house!

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S.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hmmm...well first, if he needs to get up at 6:00, he should be in bed by 7:30 every night, because at 6 he needs 10-11 hours of sleep every night. Other than that, I don't have any foolproof idea. Lights gradually brighter, favorite music, the smell of breakfast food cooking, change the order of things (my daughter likes to eat first and get dressed last)? Some kids are morning people, some aren't.

OK, now I see that he is on various meds for ADHD - in that case, this needs to be discussed with his doctor. There are many different meds for this issue, and finding the right one could improve this problem. Check with his doctor, or as another poster suggested, find a different doctor if this one isn't helping your son.

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Man, that stinks! I went through it last year for first grade. Finally bought a digital alarm clock & set alarms 1 AND 2. The second O. went off 15 minutes after the first and it was still 10 minutes before he "really" had to get up. It helped. But the "pre-waking" with opening the blind and turning on a small lamp helped my son too....
Would he respond to a sticker chart? A full week of smileys gets a small treat/reward?

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R.B.

answers from Dallas on

My son needs 10-11 hours of sleep every night. It could be he is just still a tired little guy.
Just my two cents,
R.

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T.F.

answers from San Francisco on

Ugh, I'm sorry you are starting your days like this! I'm not sure if you mean he's having trouble waking up or just not getting out of bed. I'll share what helped with my daughter and her situation just incase. She's not a good sleeper and it's definitely a sleep cycle thing. She has trouble getting to sleep and then would not wake up in the mornings for about 20 minutes of talking to her, singing loudly to her, trying to move her out of the bed.......She was SO tired and NOT waking up in the mornings. Then I moved a lamp into her room that is an Ott lite (natural light) I turn it on 30 minutes before she needs to wake up. I've noticed she's been going to sleep sooner in the evening with this (light treatment). You can find information by googling light treatment. It's ofent used for SAD (seasonal depression). If this totally misses the mark, I apologize and hope some other smart Moms have advice that fit your situation!

1 mom found this helpful
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C.T.

answers from Dallas on

Some people are morning people and some aren't. I'm guessing your son isn't. My son is slow to wake up in the morning, too. He is, also, 6. This is what works for us. I go in to wake up my son so that he has plenty of time to awaken-about 10-15 minutes works for him. I start by gently rubbing his head or back and saying good morning and singing a special little wakeup song I made up. After that I sit in the chair by his bed and talk to him about his day. For example, I may say,"Today is Monday. It's really cold out this morning so you'll have to wear a coat today and probably won't be going out to recess. I guess your class will play inside. I wonder what games you'll play? Also, today is Monday so that means PE is this afternoon," etc. I talk and ask him questions about his day until he responds which is usually about 3 or 4 minutes. Once he begins to talk to me, I get up and say,"I'm turing on the lamp, 1-2-3," and then I switch it on. After that we continue to talk while he helps me make up his bed. This works for us. No arguing, meltdowns, begging, crying, etc.

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C.S.

answers from Victoria on

I have a friend of mine whose son had this problem & she had him pick out clothes for school and would have everything ready night before, including what would be for breakfast & so there were no decisions to make that morning. She would get up and turn on music, very lively happy music, and then open the curtains to let the sunlight in, or turn on lights. all this slowly helps the body get ready to make up. Then, remove covers and if possible, turn on a fan. This will cause a change in the body temperature and help to bring him awake as well. Possibly start a vigorus massage process to get the blood pumping. I would also let him know that for every morning you have to fight to wake him up, his bedtime gets shortened 15 minutes. this worked for my kids, but they don't have any adhd problems or take meds. Hope this helps and best of luck, i can see you are over whelmed and hope you get some relief soon.

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A.B.

answers from Atlanta on

My two girls with ADD have a horrible time in the morning. The 9 year old can do it but she's mean and nasty the whole time. The 6 year old can't do a thing until after she's had her meds. I dress her like you would a baby, and sometimes I have to brush her teeth and hair as well.

I don't give them their meds before getting ready because the meds need to be taken with food or else they get a tummy ache. In addition, the meds need to be taken with a high protein breakfast in order to absorb at a steady rate (according to the Dr). So for me, meds - then back to sleep, won't work. I would have to get up, fix breakfast, force them to eat it while half asleep, give the meds, and then wait 30 minutes for them to kick in before starting to get ready. Bus comes at 6:35 so that won't work for us.

I would just drag him around like a rag doll, do everything yourself, and then get him food and meds while you wait for the bus.

I began this crappy routine when I realized that the amount of time I spent nagging the 6 year old took more time than just doing it myself. Plus we don't start the morning with a lot of fussing and tension. My hope is that as she gets older she will learn better coping techniques and be able to do more for herself in the morning. The 9 year old I just avoid and ignore until she's ready and I can feed her.

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B.

answers from Augusta on

Since he takes medication I'd start there.
Go in his room with his medication and give it to him as soon as you wake him up.
My daughter is ADHD and she is hard to get out of bed too but what helped was she has a double alarm clock , the first one is on the annoying beep beep beep, noise the second is set 15 mins after the first and it's her You better get your butt in gear and get ready for school alarm. The second is music. She always gets up better if her alarm gets turned on , it puts the ball in her court.

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R.K.

answers from Boston on

I mentioned sleep disorders in your other post and if he is still tired after all that sleep and hard to wake up it is definitely something I would look into.
http://www.wwlp.com/dpp/health/pediatrics/adhd,-sleep-dis...

This is something we are looking into for my 9 yr old. His pediatrician and I discussed it last time we were there.

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K.M.

answers from Atlanta on

I haven't had personal experience with this, but my sister gives her severely adhd son his 1st prescription about 1/2 before time for him to get up. She wakes hime enough to get him to swallow the meds & water, and then lets him snuggle back down and wake up slowly. by the time he has to be up and running, the meds have entered his system and this makes mornings much easier and nicer for all. I hope this helps.
K.

E.R.

answers from Appleton on

This is a hard one. Both my kids are like this and finally what did the trick was letting them get up 1/2 hr earlier, watching tv to kind of wake up and then start the morning routine. Eating Breakfast is last because they are slow eaters. It helps that we get everything layed out the night before. We sometimes will get outfits ready Sunday night for the whole week.

Good Luck, I know how frustrating this can be!

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

If you've tried earlier bed time and earlier rising, you might try turning the tv on for a short while. I use to wake up my son at 6am and he'd watch 1/2 of what ever was on PBS (usually the Teletubbies) and it would go off after 1 show. Eating and dressing happened while the show was on, then the tv would go off and we'd brush teeth, comb hair, put on shoes and coats and head out the door.
If he didn't want to get up, I'd tell him he's missing his show and he'd bolt out of bed for that.

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