Girls Rites of Passage

Updated on January 05, 2011
M.S. asks from New York, NY
7 answers

I am looking for multucultural Rites of Passage practices and customs for a girl who is transitioning into womanhood.. ..Websites,Books, Rituals, Articles, Places(NYC area). I want to make her sweet 16 celebration spiritual, moving but fun.

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

here's an overview of lots of different cultures:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coming_of_age

I'd go ahead and skip the genital mutilation.

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E.R.

answers from Chicago on

I think it is a fine line between making it a special occasion- and embarrassing a 16 year old girl to death, lol!

I think going out to tea or a special 'ladies lunch' with mom and grandmom and auntie and her best friend would be great. Ahead of time, get a little journal or book and ask each grown lady to write some special advice for the new young woman or something they wish THEIR mother had told them- sort of like people do for wedding showers, but for a teen age girl.

I also think a gift of a special 'sweet 16' ring or necklace might also be appropriate- something that you can tie to the memory of the day and also use to give meaning that this is an important occasion- a time when she will need to take responsibility for herself and her body, etc.

Whatever you end up doing, I think it is a lovely idea and I am sure your cousin will appreciate it.

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C.H.

answers from Dallas on

Maybe I'm being skeptical but I wouldn't be surprised if some cultural rites of passage in many countries, and even in our USA history, would be very gender negative.

Wonder if you might want to think out of the box and create a twenty-first century Rite of Passage that celebrates women's enpowerment and fewer gender barriers.

(On bring your Daughter to Work day one year, we invited women speakers who had careers in previous male-only positions who were still very feminine: a female astronaut, etc., a brain surgeon, etc.

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T.M.

answers from Columbus on

I think that is a wonderful idea. I used a book titled "Herstory: Black Female Rites of Passage" by Mary C. Lewis when I structured a rites of pssage program. This was 15 years ago so the book might be a little dated, but you could use it as a starting point for some ideas. I think you should focus on things like inner beauty, celebrating her individuality, power, and creativity as a woman. You could have the elder women in attendance bless her with their wishes for her furture. And/or you could use some of the characteristics of the naming ceremonies that exist among African and Native American peoples. Good luck.

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

For myself, when I turned 16, I got my ears pierced, could wear a little make up and shave my legs. I was already using deodorant.

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A.P.

answers from New York on

This article tells the story of a mom who created a ceremony for her daughter--it centers on menstruation, but I'm sure you could do something similar, adapt it, whatever. I just like that it's seen as such a positive thing...

http://mothering.com/health/first-moon-rising-the-making-...

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C.W.

answers from Santa Barbara on

Like T.F. below, my daughter's transition was getting that California Driver's License!! I had purchased a new car for her and she is able to be more independent now: getting to and from school, school functions, work and errands for her parents!!

Updated

Like T.F. below, my daughter's transition was getting that California Driver's License!! I had purchased a new car for her and she is able to be more independent now: getting to and from school, school functions, work and errands for her parents!!

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