Gift Ideas for Husband from His Stay at Home Wife???

Updated on December 06, 2011
A.S. asks from Fort Worth, TX
26 answers

I think the subject line sums it up. Im a new SAHM & my savings is gone after a mere 2 years. Any ideas on what to give him for Christmas? Im fairly crafty but I cant think of a thing. Thanks!

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So What Happened?

I think I should have gave more info. Yes, I have access to money, I have a credit card to do as I please & buy groceries, gas, etc. However, the savings I had when we got married is gone, which is why I asked about "free" gift ideas. This is the first time Ive been a dependent since I left home at 18; guess it's kinda freaky me out (even though I can spend freely, I still see it as "his" money).
Thanks

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K..

answers from Phoenix on

I'm a bit distracted by you saying you have no savings, and are a married SAHM. Don't you have access to a bank account? I honestly can't get past that... I guess my answer is, I wouldn't give any type of gift to a controlling man who doesn't give me access to any money.

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~.~.

answers from Tulsa on

Just because you don't work doesn't mean you shouldn't be able to access the household money in order to buy a gift. If you're looking for free ideas, a coupon book for massages, or a night where you watch a sports game with him, etc.

3 moms found this helpful

L.G.

answers from Eugene on

A cookbook of specialty foods so he can do his two nights a week of cooking as a fun project. Do you have a chef's hat to go with it.
I did that to my husband and he cooked the most exotic Indonesian meals for us. I had never eaten that food anywhere. I never cooked out of his book.

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L.U.

answers from Seattle on

wait...you have your money and he has his? How's that working out for ya? Not too well since you are asking us what to get your husband when he wont give you some dough.
Maybe a swift kick in the pants....a book on how to treat your wife.....a joint checking/savings account?
I can't think of a good thing to get him since I am ticked off for you that he wont give you any money.
L.

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R.M.

answers from Topeka on

Your savings is gone....but I guess I don't get it....you can't possibly be telling me that your husband controls every single penny that comes into the house and that you don't have access to anything? If so...you have some issues way beyond what to buy him for Christmas that need to be dealt with on a much more urgent basis!!
I was a SAHM for the first 20 years of our marriage but that didn't mean I was "broke". My husbands' money was just as accesible to me as it was to him...we worked together as a team When I went back to work, after the children were in school...we simply pooled our money...there was no "mine" and "yours"...it was all "ours".
I would tell your husband that you need some money for Christmas Shopping and go to the mall and find something within your budget that he would love.
If not...write him a nice letter telling him why you love him and wrap it up and put it under the tree.
OH honey....I read your "so what happened"...and I MUST make a comment....this is not HIS money...it is money that he earns for the FAMILY!!! You are a valuable part of the family unit....you are blessed beyond measure to be able to stay at home and rear your children...but you are still contributing to the family dynamic in SO many ways!! Don't feel like you can't spend some of that money for things that you want or for gifts for him or anyone else. Do you feel like you have to get his permission to buy Christmas gifts for the CHILDREN??? I bet you don't...so why would buying gifts for HIM be any different??? Empower yourself honey..become a real 50/50 partner in the marriage...you deserve it and you will be a better wife/mother because of it!!!

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A.F.

answers from Allentown on

Wow. Such a simple question. So sorry so many people read what isn't even there instead of answering your question. I am a SAHM right now too so I know what you mean. Seems funny to buy them something with the money they earned even if it is "ours". Some things that were either free or inexpensive that I have done for my husband..a picture frame with my baby pic, his baby pic and our first son's baby pic that said Mom + Dad = me
I made a pen holder type thing painted with our son's hand prints to have at work.
Realy anything about the kids usually goes over well! Kids pictures and handprints!
Sorry I don't have better ideas but just wanted to say...I get where your coming from! We want to feel like something came just from us:-).

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A.S.

answers from Iowa City on

BUY the man something he wants.

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❤.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

-Wrap a candle & an eye mask a note: "sensual massage night for an hour. It's all you after the kids go to bed".
-If he reads, buy him his favorite paperback or check it out from the library close to the 25th (just make sure he knows he has to read it & return in w/i 2 weeks)
-put together a mini photo album w/photos of you & your kids telling a story from when you met. You can even cut out words from a magazine to add some funny bylines
-write him a short poem
-write a list of 20 reasons why you love him
-go somewher (park etc) & take a pic of you & the kids, frame it for him)
-get a copy of a newspaper from the library from the day he was born
-invite some of his friends over for a Christmas cocktail & appetizers if you think he'd like it
-does he like a particular game or magazine? You could buy him a one of those (if inexpensive)
-does he wear gloves?
-does he need work gloves (fairly inexpensive @ Home Depot)
-get a picture of his first home as a kid & build a mini version of it (using
popsicle stick, wood from around the house/yard, paint it etc)

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A.C.

answers from Savannah on

Wow. Some of your answers were reading a lot into it maybe? My husband HATES it when I call things "his" money, because he insists it's "our" money, we are a team, and I "must" remember this and not have the wrong attitude. He needs me. He constantly tells me this. And the truth is, he works hard for the paychecks, and then on weekends he is just "daddy" and plays only. I am a sahm and dude, I work hard too (and he knows that), I am the household manager and take care of all shopping and bills, but I feel funny about buying him a present with "his" money. I don't care what he says, it's just weird to take the money from his job and buy him a present with it. So, if that's the situation you're in, I totally get what you're saying. (Obviously, there are crappy men who control their wives with money, but you haven't said that's what's going on here).
That said: my 5 year old son and I get those free kits from Lowes and Home Depot (they do these build and grow workshops once a month). Because I have a little one who acts up and will NOT sit still or behave for these workshops, the lady in charge of it lets me take ours home. We keep them for rainy day projects or gifts. So, my 5 year old has built a bank for his little brother, and a bird house for his daddy. This week, daddy is in England visiting his mom, so we have plenty of time to lay out the newspapers and let him paint his presents and let them dry, and we'll wrap them up and he has made his own gifts. We also take small canvases from Michaels and each child (including our 2 year old) gets to make their own masterpiece which we date, initial, and display during the Christmas season along the mantle, bars, etc. I paint the canvases a solid color so it's not plain white all the time (whatever their favorite color is that year) and then they can paint and do their own thing. So my 2 year old will get to give the painting he's made, and he will help me with putting a couple things in gift bags (for big brother, grandma, etc) as "work" so he can feel like he's made an effort and contributed to the gift giving process.
For myself: there's a few things I've been able to do that have gone over pretty well. I'm not very crafty---I can't sew, or whatever. But Jer's got a pretty, but manly wooden box that is his "treasure", with all the reasons I could think of, on things I love about him. I slipped one reason (little slips of paper) into each balloon, blew up the balloons, and filled up his car completely. In his card, I taped a big knitting needle inside with a note that said "You'll need this to figure out what all I love about you". He had to pop balloons (and find the "reasons") just to get into the car, lol. And there were over 100, since he's got a big car. He kept all those reasons and when I realized he was being uncharacteristically sentimental about that, I gave him a lovely, manly wooden box (cost about $5 at World Market) and put them in there. He still has it, 7 years later, and it's prominently displayed (though casual friends don't know what it is, lol). Another time I did spend about $40 or 50 at kodakgallery.com and made a special photo book for him. (You can get them for $30-40 now though, through snapfish or whatever.....and sometimes you can get deals like buy 1 get 2 free and spend $40 for 3 books---I did this for my father in Germany, my mom, and his mom one time). But anyway, for his photo book, I wanted it to "star" him since it was a gift FOR him, and so I titled the book "The ABCs of Daddy" and wrote a little note on the first page, explaining what the book was and how I got the idea, and then a little interview with our son who was 3 at the time (hilarious: 2 of the best questions were "What makes daddy a GOOD daddy?" and the answer was "He makes funny smiles, plays games, and brush him's teeth"....my other favorite question during the interview was "If Daddy had a fight with an alligator, who would win?" and the answer was "Hmm.....the shark.") Then I had A is for...Love that is Absolute (a neat picture of the 2 of us dancing), Travels Abroad (a picture of us in England), the Dallas Aquarium (a neat pic of a shark, with him and our son in the reflection of the shark tank). Then B, etc, etc. (For X I had to get out the dictionary and find Xeric: Desert like conditions, and had some pictures of our trip to the Grand Canyon and Monument Valley that fit that. Some of them were a little hard, took some creativity, but well worth it). Jeremy actually teared up on that one, totally choked him up. So yeah, well worth the money because he doesn't cry. One time I threw him a great party (surprise party) and had a little thing where his friends filled out wishes or comments to him, and I even got online and contacted his out of state and out of country friends/family (people I've never even met, lol) and sweet talked them into emailing me their messages too. I copy/pasted the messages onto a Word document, a different font and/or color for each message, and then after printing them cut them out and put them in a ready made "manly" scrapbook/photobook from Michaels, along with jokes, poems, pictures, or little stories that people wanted to share for his birthday party even though they couldn't make it. I had the people that did come fill out their messages and I added them to the book and took a few polaroids there at the party to add "instantly" to the book. He thought that was awesome and a great surprise. I think it all takes a little money, but it's more about the thought behind the gift, and the effort in putting it out, and making him a "star" for that gift, in my opinion, that will rock his world.
Another thing that's come off really well: an event he would love to go to. OR if you give him a little "itinerary" of your upcoming date night that you've already made arrangements for. Jeremy loves it if I make arrangements for a sitter, get it all together, and all he has to do is shave, dress, and enjoy himself, whatever it is. LOTS AND LOTS of grand things you can do in the DFW area for free or cheap on a date, but even spending some money on a nice date night is ok because it's fun and enjoyable for both of you guys. Good luck with it all! Have fun! And you don't have to feel bad about spending a little money on him. You are a team.

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

I really don't get... why you have to spend money you don't have... on a gift for him.

DID you tell him, you do NOT have money? And that all YOUR savings, is gone?
So basically, you are a single parent???? Except, you don't have any access to, or means, to support yourself. Meaning, apparently your Husband does not.... 'give' you money???
Wow.

You could, write a poem. That doesn't cost anything.
You could, bake him cookies, with what you have in the kitchen already. That doesn't cost anything.
You could, paint him something. That doesn't cost anything either.

Does your Husband... really 'expect' you to even buy him a gift... being that you support yourself? And which your money is now gone?
He needs.... to know that.
I imagine, your money has also been... used to support your kids and getting them what they need or want. As it is with many Moms.
I would... give him a "bill"... summarizing everything you have paid for. For the children. And family.

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E.M.

answers from Honolulu on

Wow, I am a SAHM and the fact after 2 years "your" money is spent...and from what I understand not going to be replenished... Is well odd to me... We lived under the poverty line for a while and we each got our own blow money even then... Sure it was 2 dollars a month, but it was blow! Now that we are doing better we each get paid from the joint checking about 50 a month.

Anyway, cheap gifts...

It matters what your craft skills are and materials are.

I knit and a sweater in about 10 days is not unheard of. If baking is your thing, then bug his mom for his favorite meal recipes.

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G.T.

answers from Redding on

Buy yourself a pretty red nighty and give him yourself with a special touch on Christmas Eve or Christmas morning, whatever works best.
When someone asks him what he got for Christmas, he'll have that "grin" that says it all.

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J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

You need to stop seeing it as his money. The money is both of yours. I always took it out of the working savings. Like here is the budget and working savings is what is left over but not earmarked for savings.

Home made gifts for men are kinda sucky. Just go with something simple like a book he has been looking at but didn't have time to buy. Maybe some accessory he has been looking at. Kind of universal, guys like gifts that they actually need, not something for the sake of giving.

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T.V.

answers from San Francisco on

AFTER READING YOUR "SO WHAT HAPPENED": His money? Are you kidding me? What's his is yours, what's yours is his (this means anything gained after your date of marriage). Does he make you feel this way or do you feel this way?

What's your budget? What kind of things is your husband in to? More info required. Do you think a good gift would be to go back to work?

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L.C.

answers from Washington DC on

Make him a coupon book with coupons for him to use.
Plan a surprise date night.
Make him a trash container for his car out of a pair of old jeans.
Make him a pair of mittens out of an old sweater.
Make him a scarf.
Go on Pinterest and look around.
YMMV
LBC

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A.G.

answers from Houston on

Its all your money too. get him something he wants but wont buy. get him something that will mean more sex, lol. I did both. I got my husband his favorite cologne that i also happen to swoon over................its a win/win

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A.H.

answers from Dallas on

Not free, but thrifty. I made a collage mousepad for my spouse with his favorite comic heros. I also made him a custom keychain. Shop around from Vistaprint, snapfish and Winkflash.

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H.O.

answers from Dallas on

Last year I went on imagechef.com. You can type in some words like his name and words to describe him and what he means to you and your children. It makes it into a design, then print it on card stock. Looks really cool! I did that and bought a 3 or 4 dollar frame and gave it to him as a gift. He thought it was great!

R.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

Some no sew fleece scarves would be inexpensive and easy to do, I've made several so far and am making more as gifts and the most I've paid for one was $2, I've been buying the fleece at Joann's:
http://www.highcountrymomsquad.com/crafting-with-niki-no-...

What about a coupon book for special dinners, massages, etc.? You can pick up patterned scrapbook paper at dollar stores or Michael's sometimes 5 sheets for $1 as well as construction paper, cut out pieces of white paper with scalloped or other fancy scissors, write your coupon on them, glue the white sheets to squares of patterned or solid papers and make them into a little book.

And something I did one year when funds were really low and I was concentrating on spending our money on the kids, I traced their little hands (they were 5 and 2) onto poster board and retraced the cutouts onto scrapbooking paper, bought some foam sheets, cut large circles and made wreathes out of them for about 6 or 7 adults in the family. laying the hands slightly overlapping each other all around in a circle. I used papers for a boy and a girl as that's what they were, and mixed them up, the randomness lent to the cuteness of the wreathes. I look at mine from time to time and can't believe how they've grown, now 13 and 10...so glad I made them!

M.L.

answers from Houston on

Yeah, what Amanda says... do you not have any funds aside from your spent savings?? Does he not share his income for you to play with at all or to share in financial decision making and budgeting? If so, I'd have a serious talk with him about that, b/c you do deserve a cut you know. If you don't have some sort of money for YOU, then I would not get him a gift at all ;) Of course, I could be misinterpreting things...

But to answer your question, if you want to make him something, do you sew? I've seen some neat manly scarf tutorials out there lately, that are really easy, you can make them out of old tshirts or even fleece. Here are some pretty neat and easy ideas you can make for pretty cheap:

http://www.tipjunkie.com/home-made-christmas-gift-ideas/
http://www.marthastewart.com/275582/handmade-gifts-for-hi...

As for my husband, he is pretty easy. I get him the specialty salami from the deli and homemade salsa. One year, I organized a lot of his old photos from his childhood/family/teen years and made him a photo journal.

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A.H.

answers from Dallas on

Store bought gifts are over rated! = 0 )
I would type up a letter to him on the computer of what love you have for him and how much he means to you & how you appreciate the things he does or the way he takes care of you & your family, children etc. A gift from the heart is better than any gift bought. If you really wanted to purchase him something, Snapfish.com has a great personalization site and I ordered a coffee mug for my husband with pictures of he & I & our children...with free shipping coupon they sent me, it cost $9.99 with tax...they also have mouse pads or whatever else that might interest you. You will set up a free account with them & most of the time you either get offered free shipping or % off. Worth looking into... Merry Christmas!

J.P.

answers from Lakeland on

I am a SAHM too. I am going to take a shot in the dark and assume that you don’t want him seeing (in a bank statement or credit card statement) what you got him. I would hope that you have access to money that he is making. (It should be considered "our" money). I will usually take out some cash to get my hubby's present or use one of my credit cards (he doesn't usually open my statements).
As for what to give him, I have trouble every year with this so I am not sure what to suggest.
What are his hobbies?

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J.J.

answers from Phoenix on

According to my hubby the best gift I can give him is me. After 3 kids the present he wants is me to himself. I am planning a night where it is just the two of us, a home made meal, and me pampering him for being the wonderful husband and father that he is.

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C.B.

answers from Dallas on

Bake some cupcakes and make them look nice and yummy.

PS - When two people are married, it becomes "our" money.

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S.M.

answers from Washington DC on

I am assumning your questions is that you and your husband don't have the savings left to purchace gifts for each other, so you want to make something.Can I suggest you give him a coupon for a romantic dinner? Plan to hire a sitter, cook his favorite meal, tablecloth and candles, fancy dessert, champagne, etc. Let him pick the day. You could even make up a "menu" to give him.

If you guys have enough money and are trying to keep the gift or gift amount a secret, I would just use a credit card. Unlikely the statement will come before Christmas at this point.

If you are saying you have no money because you don't work outside the house anymore... You may be having trouble adjusting to the idea that you aren't contributing finacnially. I think a lot of married dual income couples have their own little slush funds But the fact is that what he earns is still yours. If it make it easier to think about, start putting away cash into a "you account" over the next year, that way you always have a little spending money you won't feel accountable for and you can buy for him without the worry. But you have as much right to the family account as he does, and I hope you know that. Your post is certainly giving the impression you are struggling with that concept.

Just as an aside, my husaband and I usually pick a joint gift, something we want for us, like new bedding or a weekend at a B&B or new sneakers for us both. That sort of thing.

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S.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

It's hard to give suggestions without for info as to what your husband's activities are. One of the gifts I've given my husband, which he uses almost everyday and he was so happy to get was a warm robe. He got slippers too, but he doesn't use them much. This year I bought the old model Kindle ($80), he saw it and has been using it for 2 weeks. He loves it and he's been such a good Papa and husband that it was fun to see him so excited that he couldn't wait for Christmas. Good luck finding the right gift for your husband.

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