Gift for Baby in Icu?

Updated on June 29, 2009
L.F. asks from Tyler, TX
12 answers

I need an idea of what to send a friends baby in the icu. He is in renal failure and could possibly need a transplant. As of now the drs say he is making slight progress but will be in the hospital for a while. I want to send a gift as a reminder that my family is thinking of them and praying for them daily. Any ideas? Thanks!

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K.H.

answers from Dallas on

when our baby was in the hospital the best thing that people did for us was to bring us food or go to our house & mow the lawn or water my flowers. of course, baby loved all the small stuffed animals & such too.

1 mom found this helpful

G.W.

answers from Dallas on

That's very generous of you to want to give a gift to your friend's baby. As a mother who had a child in the hospital from 9/8/08 until 12/17/08, I can tell you that the gifts mean so much. That being said, I'd get a small stuffed animal or somthing like that but I would give a gift to the parents, too, in the way of a gift card to a restaurant near the hospital or a Visa gc. Those gifts are what are really helpful when you find yourself in a situation that can be so financially draining. You don't plan in your budget for things like that, that's for sure. Believe me, the baby will get tons of gifts and most of them will have to be left at home since space at the hospital is so limited. But helping the parents is very appreciated, believe me, I know....

1 mom found this helpful
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K.T.

answers from Dallas on

I don't really know what you could offer the baby but maybe think about the mom. I did have someone we went to church with that delivered at 24 weeks. She spent 100 some odd days in the NICU. She wrote a book about her experience to help other moms in the same shoes. You might get this book for your friend or something like it.

http://www.amothersdiary.com/prod_desc2.htm

Hope this helps.

K.

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L.P.

answers from Dallas on

When our second son was in the NICU the best thing that friends did for us to offer help with our older son and to bring food to us. We had dinner brought over almost nightly for a month. With the stress of dealing with a newborn in the NICU going to the grocery store and cooking dinner was the last thing I wanted to think about. If you know other people that are friends with this couple ask them to sign up for to make meals. Trust me, it will be VERY appreciated.

Another idea is to make a basket of stuff for the mom / dad. A friend of mine had her dd at 29 weeks and we got some snacks, books (chick-lit, easy to read stuff), magazines, hand lotion, bubble bath, etc for her. When you are spending so much time at the hospital it was nice to have some easy snacks to pop out and eat quickly. And you have to wash your hands for 5 minutes and scrub every time you go in, your hands get incredibly dry so we gave her lotion.

I will say a prayer for the baby and the family.

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G.G.

answers from Dallas on

We aren't Catholic, but some Catholic friends of ours brought our daughter a necklace with a St. Christopher charm. It wasn't for her to wear; it was for us to hang above her crib as a reminder that our friends were praying for her. Seeing it was very comforting and it took up so little space. Then, when we brought her home, the necklace came, too, and if she ever decides she likes jewelry, she has a very meaningful piece to wear. : ) Blessings to your friend and her baby!

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H.S.

answers from Dallas on

When my son was in the hospital we were given a few of those edible arrangements. It was great that we had fresh fruit on hand (because honestly at that point you just don't have the time). It helped us eat right, keep our older child eating well and was very thoughtful. All the other suggestions sound great too, just thought I'd through in my two cents. :)

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J.M.

answers from Dallas on

As a mom to a baby who was in the NICU for 10 weeks, prayers are the most important thing that you can do. If you want to actually give something to the parents, then give them books, magazines, crosswords, anything that they can read or do while sitting at the bedside. I know that I got to the hospital at 9am and left at about 9pm everyday until he came home. I ate all of my meals at the hospital so you could also arrange to meet your friend in the cafeteria and either eat a meal with them or bring them something to eat there.
My prayers will be with your friend's family. I understand the heartache. My son was one procedure away from being put on the kidney transplant list himself. Fortunately, he didn't need it. And 3 years later, he is awesome!

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S.L.

answers from Dallas on

After reading all of the response you have been given I have to agree with the ones where it helps the family. My daughter was a premiee and the best gifts that I rec'd was the ones of food, and parking pass. To be quite honest with your the parking pass was great I did not have to worry about how much it was going to cost to visit my child, and where was I going to find the money to pay for the visit. Also havig someone come over and take care of laundry, watering, and feeding the animals was wonderfully. I will keep your friends in my prayers. God bless you.

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M.C.

answers from Dallas on

A visit where you bring in a good meal--homecooked or from a restaurant--would be great if you're in the area. If not, a gift certificate to a restaurant near the hospital, like the other mom said. When DD was in PICU at 6 mos old, my aunt (who lives in Boston) arranged to have a local restaurant deliver us a Thanksgiving dinner, since we couldn't be with family. One of the many, many tough things about having a baby in PICU is that you really don't want to leave his/her side for even a second, but that's VERY draining on the parents. One of the nicest things done for us, simple as it was, was my BFF came to the hospital and made me come downstairs with her to the hospital cafeteria and eat a proper meal with her. You can't eat in your kid's room in the ICU, so DH and I were literally wolfing down a take-out hamburger or sandwich in 5 minutes in the lounge, then running back in. While this is totally understandable, it's really not sustainable--as a friend, you should help the parents take care of themselves. Another option would be to offer to sit with the baby while they go out together for an hour and sit down in a restaurant to eat, or even just go for a walk outside the hospital. DH and I literally never saw each other outside of the ICU, since we always traded off eating, sleeping, etc.

This all might sound weird, since I'm talking about the parents instead of the baby--but if the baby's in ICU, he/she is very sick, and hopefully getting excellent medical care, but there're really not much you can do for him/her that the doctors, nurses, and parents aren't already doing. If you do bring anything, it should be a stuffed animal, but the baby will likely get plenty of those. You're not allowed to have flowers or food in the ICU, and the baby is probably too sick to play with many toys. You could bring a couple of books--even though DD was only 6 mos old when she was in (she had open heart surgery to repair a congenital heart defect), pretty much the only thing I could do for her, once she started to feel better but was still in ICU (by feel better, I mean was awake sometimes and not in too much pain if she didn't move) was read her books--and I read a lot. Of course, at that age, she probably didn't understand much, but she heard my voice, and looked at pictures. We tried Baby Einstein DVD's, but she was too young to get it (with the speakers on the bed like they are at the hospital, she could literally never find the TV to look at, since the sound wasn't coming from the same place! LOL!)

I hope all of this helps. My prayers go out to your friend--having a baby in PICU is always awful, but hopefully things will turn out okay. My DD is now 2 yrs old and totally healthy--babies are incredibly resilient, and God is great. Most of all, just remind your friend often that her baby is in your prayers--the emails I received from friends and family letting us know that they were praying for DD made a world of difference to me while we were in the hospital.

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G.H.

answers from Dallas on

Hi LF,

What a nice offer. During this times the baby is getting what he needs from the hospital, but the parent are living on a lot of take out and little sleep.

You might offer to take them some home cooked meals and if you know others who know them, you can take turns doing this and spending time with the mom to help her. Everyone needs someone they can talk to, having someone that will listen and understand is always a good thing.

You can also offer to help with house cleaning, like washing cloths and such. I'm sure the parents are spending a lot of time at the hospital so that would be helpful.

Maybe when the baby comes home you can buy something then. They won't let you bring anything into the room with the baby in ICU and it could get lost. So best to help the parents is possible.

Love and Light,
Rev. G. Hudson,

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K.G.

answers from Dallas on

All of these suggestions sound perfect, this one is a bit different and it's free! There are 2 main organizations that I would get in contact with: Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep or ACPCG. They are a group of photographers (I'm proud to be one) who specialize it providing photography to critically ill children, even those in the NICU. It's so tough to take great pictures for parents. They can't seem to think of anything but day, to day survival. The sessions are free and are priceless memories, whether the child makes it or not (and I pray to God the LO does!) They are the most precious photos and especially with NILMDTS the photographers are trained to handle the sensitive nature of these sessions. Perhaps you could look up the info for your friend and help arrange a session. The parents would be very grateful! http://www.nowilaymedowntosleep.org/

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C.A.

answers from Dallas on

As the mom of a preemie that was in the NICU for just 10 days, I'd say the VERY best gift we got while our daughter was in there was parking vouchers for the hospital so I could go see her any time I wanted. Second to that was food so my husband didn't have to figure out what to make and so I could rest while I was home.

Hope this helps, all my best to your friends and their little one!

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