Getting Baby to Sleep Through the Night

Updated on January 28, 2009
C.T. asks from Grand Forks, ND
16 answers

How can I get my baby to sleep through the night? Taking away his pacifier is not an option (crazy, I know) We'd rather he not cry it out for long periods or anything, are there other softer methods that we may try? what has worked best for some of you moms? help!

Thanks for the help so far, everyone: I should add baby is 5 mo. old and wakes almost every 1 1/2..we began waiting longer between middle of the night feedings..if it's been less than 4-5 hrs, we keep giving him the paci, otherwise we feed him, he goes back to sleep, but it's a gamlbe how long he stays that way. He's normally a very good baby, naps well, happy, he's just been waking several times between feedings, and shortly after feedings as well, so I know it's isn't all hungry related cries/fusses.

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L.S.

answers from Wausau on

I have not had a chance to read through the other responses, so this might be a duplicate. But what worked for me was leaving the shirt I was wearing that day in his crib. He just needed my scent, and he needed it to be a fresh scent.

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E.O.

answers from Appleton on

Hi C.,

I know you don't what to hear this, but with both my children we did the cry it out and it worked. The first & second night are the worst but then after that it gets so much better and you wonder why you didn't do it sooner.

I wish you all the luck :)

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E.I.

answers from Duluth on

yeah, dont worry about taking away the pacifier. an unfulfilled need turns into an undesireable habit later - i know a boy who wasnt allowed a pacifier, and he now grits and grinds his teeth.
:D
how old is your baby! i would LOVE to help you out - i never used the cry it out method with my son (whos now 2) and hes the MOST BEAUTIFUL sleeper ive ever known. crying it out breaks down the trust your baby has for you - his crying is a communication, and ignoring it only teaches him that you dont listen when he has a need... however, you are the parent, you have the spacific instincts you need for your child, and at differing ages they will have different cries letting you know if its a need or not quite as important... that doesnt happen until around a year old.

sleeping in the same room as you helps babies sleep. just knowing you are there, hearing you breathe. also it helps because they dont have to get so worked up before you hear them.
i will tell you something too about babies, they DO NOT sleep through the night... they have tiny tiny tummies, about the size of their fist! they cant make it through the whole night sleeping. .. they need food at some point!
theres lots of answers, lots of different situations. its hard to say what to do without more information, how are you feeding? where is he sleeping? is dad involved in the relationship? are you working?
anyway, send me a message, i would LOVE to help you work through this!

2 moms found this helpful
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C.D.

answers from La Crosse on

Dear C.,
If you haven't already, re-read Ericka I's advice below. It's the best you've gotten so far on this subject. Then go to http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T070200.asp
because gentle, tear-free sleep training is the least convenient method BUT it is the most rewarding on so many important levels.

Good luck, and congratulations on your decision not to make your baby cry it out.

-C..

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J.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

Depends upon how old your baby is as to how long he will sleep. But we use the book Good Night, Sleep Tight by Kim West. It is a gentle approach and you won't have to let him cry it out. The book is broken up into sections by age and starts off with newborns. Each age section will tell you how much sleep they need and how to help them learn to self soothe. And there are sections in back for routine busters, and medical conditions. I cannot recommend the book enough!

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L.V.

answers from Minneapolis on

I know "crying it out" is tough on you as a parent (me too!) but it worked well for us. Our son cried the first couple nights for only a few min. and went back to sleep. We also put a "baby sound sleeper" type thing in his room that plays soothing music & has soft lighting. It turns on & off automatically when movement is heard/notheard. We tried these two things at the same time and baby has been sleeping very well now.

GOOD LUCK!

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K.C.

answers from Milwaukee on

We have a 10 month old who would wake up several times throughout the night. One of our friends recommended a humidifier for the quiet noise, and I can't thank her enough. He rarely wakes up now (even when the dogs bark)! Good luck!

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J.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

C.,

How old is your baby? Keep this in mind, all kids are different. I finally have a "good sleeper", but am not doing anything different than I did with the first two, they only slept through the night after I weaned them at about a year and a half... not good news, I know... But my new baby sleeps 6-7 hours most nights, only getting up once to eat. I am pretty sure it is just the way she is, meaning, sometimes your babies just need you more at night.

That said, I recommend the No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley. She has some good suggestions for helping babies sleep longer at night, and not letting them cry it out.

Jessica

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C.H.

answers from Minneapolis on

C.-
First, I don't think you have to get rid of the paci--my son used one for about 18 months...I don't think there's any harm in it. Second, it was already mentioned, but the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" is a great resource! It talks about several different methods you can use for getting your child to sleep, so you can choose what option might work best for you, based on your feelings and philosophy about your child (i.e. whether you want them to cry it out, or let them cry a little and go in and soothe them without picking them up, or never letting them cry). Hope it helps!

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J.S.

answers from Madison on

we loved being intruduced to the babywise book and recommend parent directed feeding.... this does not mean not listening to your baby's cues; it means the opposite but with wisdom.....
if you have heard anything negative about this; please read for yourself...we were introduced to it for our first child but chose to try something else....
after having used the books suggestions for our second one we see such a difference; if we had it to do over again we would have used the method for the first child....
the book is Babywise, topic; PDF autor Ezzo (1of2)

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M.N.

answers from Eau Claire on

"Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" is a great sleep book. I can't recommend it enough.

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A.R.

answers from Madison on

I was also opposed to the cry it out method, but when my baby was 7 months old, we finally gave it a try after nothing else worked. after a few nights of letting him cry (25 minutes was the longest), he started to sleep so much better. he started falling asleep on his own at night and at 9 months old he started sleeping 12 hour stretches at night! I recommend Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Baby by Dr. Weissbluth. Good luck, I know how difficult this time can be!

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T.C.

answers from Minneapolis on

I know a lot of moms out there dont believe in the cry it out method and i dont believe in letting your baby cry for hours but i did the cry it out method and it worked great for us. My son was only getting up once a nite by 4 months and that was just to cuddle not to eat. and i think by aroud 5 - 6 months i let him cry it out when he woke up. He never crided for more than a half hour and he was back to sleep. After about 3 nites he was sleeping thru the nite 90% of the time. Now he is almost 18 months and is a relativly good sleeper. He falls asleep with his nuk but also knows how to put himself back to sleep without it. good luck!

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S.F.

answers from Madison on

When my kids were babies(starting as infants) we used the methods in "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Marc Weissbluth. It is really a great book and is broken down by age.

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M.W.

answers from St. Cloud on

How old is your baby? Because young babies are not built to sleep through the night. They only sleep in 2 to 5 hour stretches.

Once kids reach 6 to 7 months they tend to sleep a bit longer. About 4 to 7 hours is pretty typical.

My son (breastfed till 18 months) did not sleep through the night until about 16 months. And he even went through some stretches at about 12 to 14 months where he got up every 2 hours to nurse..... We do not believe in crying it out and now that he is weaned, he sleeps through the night, no problem!

If your child is waking up, it is because he/she needs something. Babies are not mentally able to manipulate their parents. Crying is their only way of communicating that something is wrong.... Hungry, scared, wet/dirty diaper, etc.

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T.N.

answers from Minneapolis on

C., you didn't mention how old your little one is.
I'm sure you'll get lots of great answers. My only advice is, make sure there isn't a night light on. You want the baby to realize it is not time to "wake up" when they rouse themselves in the night. If it is dark, odds are they will go right back to sleep. If there is a light on, even a little, they'll look around and wake more. Keep a night light available to turn on when you need to go into the room or change a diaper - just don't let them sleep with it on. I swear, it helps!

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