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I suggest helping him find ways he can earn $ from the gaming. There are many places that pay ppl t test games out.. though not paying for him to go to college is bad. Him yelling and breaking things is not good but you treating him like he's 5 is most likely why he is acting like that. Best bet he's just enjoying hos break and if he's not keeping you up . let him be

I'd be far more concerned about his tendency to violent moods than the gaming itself. Loss of sleep could contribute to lack of control over emotions. OR, he could be using the computer to essentially "self medicate" and make his emotional reality more tolerable.

Lots of people use some crutch or another, alcohol or shopping or gaming or television or whatever, when they feel there's nothing else they can do to be happier while otherwise meeting their obligations. Many such people are using the chosen activity to fend off depression. These behaviors are considered an addiction when they reach the point where the person becomes unable to meet other work or family obligations. Is your son at that point, or is he still basically holding it all together?

At any rate, if he's getting passing grades and wants to go on with his education, I wouldn't take that away from him. If he is coping with depression (which is common in the age group), keeping him home could make him feel useless and more depressed.

If he's in college, he's probably at least 18, and essentially an adult. It might be time to let him make his own decisions. If he starts flunking classes, then it would be entirely appropriate to stop paying for his education. Having to get a job might "wake him up" from frivolous activities, but if he's really unhappy, it could also make it worse.

If you are concerned that he's addicted, I would strongly recommend that YOU attend some Al Anon meetings. You will learn what is possible to change and how to go about it, and what is best left alone.

How much does he play when he's NOT on break? How are his grades?

I think the bigger problem than gaming is that he screams and breaks things. Gaming is addictive, and many college boys play as much as your son. I have noticed that boys get agitated when you try to take their games away. It is a problem, but I don't know the solution. However, if my college-age son broke things in my home, there would be some SERIOUS consequences. I don't think making him quit college and stay home is the answer -- do you think his behavior will be better at home? It doesn't sound like it. If his grades are terrible, maybe you can give him one more semester to improve and then stop paying for his college and tell him to get an apartment somewhere and a job.

Pay for college. What keeps people from playing games is other activites. I would not, and I repeat...WOULD NOT let him stay home and play games. He needs professional help...plain and simple (sorry to be so blunt, but there it is). Reading up on strategy and ways to win something is not necessarily bad, but 12 hours in front of a computer probably is. And screaming at you and breaking things is NOT NORMAL. Period. He needs help. God bless.

In order to figure out their limits, kids have to actually FIND them. Typically by screwing up and learning from them. And being YOUNG their limits regarding sleep tend to be pretty out there.

For ME the anger would be a no-go... about ANY issue... but as an adult my parents have NO right to try and control my life/what I do during my free time. Of course, my parents would have been thrilled if I'd stayed home safe playing videogames. At 17 my idea of a good time (I was in the military at 17) was rappelling down the side of a building, or blowing stuff up at a quarry, staying out dancing all night, swimming 5 miles in a storm, or sweet talking a pilot into doing g-turns.

Personally I wouldn't quit paying for school merely because I dislike what my son does in his freetime. Especially since what he's doing is legal (as opposed to, say, drinking/partying). To me it's the same as if he were reading 12 hours a day, or playing basketball 12 hours a day, or filming, or watching movies, or drawing. It might not be what *I* would choose to do on MY vacation, but it's not my vacation. An activity that my son chooses to do in his freetime is HIS choice. If it were a major departure (aka if he were depressed) I'd be concerned... ditto if he were hurting people or himself I'd be concerned.

Well, your son isn't a child anymore. How are his grades? As long as he's keeping up his end of the bargain at school, you should probably voice your concerns and then leave it alone. Yes, some people are addicted to it, but some (especially young men) just like it and make it their number one hobby. I know grown men who are far out of college who spend quite a bit of time gaming and that's what they like to do. They have jobs and homes, but that's how they spend almost all of their spare time. Not my cup of tea -but it may be your son's! Unless his grades are bad and he's slipping up in college, your friends are correct -keeping him OUT of college for a semester is just going to give him twice as much time to play video games! What about a job? Does he work? He should have a part time job at least.

I personally don't see the fascination with video games, but I might be a minority.
It sounds like your son is an adult. Does he only play during his school breaks? Is he failing in his college courses?
I'm wondering if you are trying to control something that isn't that bad. I mean, if you don't want him up until 3am in your house because he keeps other people awake, I can see that. If his playing is interfering with other aspects of his life as far as being responsible, I can see concern.
But, I know a 24 year old that is a political science major at a well known university and will be going to law school when he graduates. He plays video games and has his online "friends" and opponents, but it hasn't interfered with his success outside of that. He's also a musician.
I don't know what to say about your son's temper. That's pretty scary. I don't know if making him move home will make that any better.
I wish you the best. Perhaps you can find a compromise with him.

I am understanding he is over 18 and making a choice for himself? If his grades go below a c average discuss the option of not paying his tuition if he doesn't bring his grades back up within the next semester but otherwise it's not really your business what he spends his time doing...

It sounds like your son has an addiction. I don't have advice regarding this other than to seek some professional help, both for him and for you as to as to how to deal with it.

However, is he still getting good grades in school? If his grades are good and he's getting his education, then what he does on his free time at school is his choice to make as an adult.

If his grades are slipping, then I would agree with not paying his tuition. However, along with this comes the rule of no video games in your home. Also you will not allow him to just sit arround the house, he will have chores and responsibilities.

He's addicted. If his grades are okay there probably isnt much you can do. If he fails out I'd make sure to let him know he cant live at home without a job and paying rent. You'll hafta wait till he hits bottom just like a alcoholic, drug or food addict. My 30 yr old makes 6 figures, but all of his spare time is spent gaming for the most part. He will probably never get married unless he marries an avatar or a gal that is as equally addicted as he is I'm afraid. These are weird times. You arent alone. There are tons of game addicted kids and adults right now. You cant help him if he's not seeing a problem with it himself. Just don't enable him.... that's about all you can do. The fact that he's getting violent is not good. You may have to have him move out, period. If you can send him to a college dorm that would be your best bet.

My ex husband also had an addiction to online gaming. If someone becomes angry when you confront them about a behavior, or even just try to discuss it with them, that is one of the main signs of addiction.

I would definitely let him know that you will not pay his college tuition - or for his computer hookup- if his grades drop below a certain level. He is at college to learn and to get himself ready for a career first and foremost.

Online gaming in fine in small doses. I have gamed myself and know many people who enjoy online games and communities recreationally. But- not unlike the difference between someone who has a drink or two at a party or a beer while watching football and an alcoholic who cannot STOP drinking- there are a lot of people who become so involved in their online lives that they cannot take the same time and interest in their actual lives.

Your son needs to find a balance. I would also talk to a counselor at his school. I am sure your son is not the only student with this issue and a counselor may have some insights into how to teach him to understand he is not balancing his time well. There may be support groups, etc- you may be able to get your son to 'schedule' his game time just like anything else.

Good luck, I really hope your son can see your concern for him and your family can find a better balance for his life.

online gaming is a real addiction. My husband had to limit his gaming to 2-3 nights per week, with Friday his set "raid" night with his group. He is super looking forward to the next 2 days where I work and he has off and can play online games till I get home.

He may need to see a psychologist. one of my good friends from college is finishing his masters thesis on online gaming communities and addiction, it's a real thing.