Fussy Baby

Dental pain is often a reason babies wake in the night. She may be teething, or experiencing some decay, which may be the whole reason she's waking up. It's difficult for little kids to know what to do with oral pain (and earaches, although I admit I don't really know what makes an earache any better, either), so she may just be expressing her discomfort.

Have you read the Happiest Baby on the Block by Dr. Harvey Karp? It is a lifesaver. Keep her swaddled and SHHHHHH in her ear to calm her.

I think that babies generally cry when something is wrong. They are tired, hungry, teething, sick etc. Something is out of whack. I am a great believer in chiropractic care. Have you tried that?? I don't know where you live but I would highly recommend Dr. Gingell who is in Plymouth on Main Street just south of Ann Arbor Road. His phone # is ###-###-####. He does a lot of work with children. My kids love him and ask to go. Good luck.
Barb

Are you nursing her? If so, look at your diet and see if there is anything new you've started eating in the evenings that might be causing her some tummy troubles.

Also, honestly, it isn't too early for her to start teeting. My daughter started exhibiting teething signs at 2 months! So, try offering her a cold cloth to chew on, or a cold teether... see if that helps.

Another good website is.... www.askdrsears.com

Good luck!

Hi A.---I have a couple of questions you might considers. You didn't indicate whether or not you are nursing your baby. You might want to see if anything that you are eating may be causing her to experience her problems. I would totally eliminate milk as it is highly allergenic. Another culprit may be gluten. Even though these may not bother you, these allergies and sensitivities show up in ways that aren't obvious and often times difficult to uncover. Most doctors don't even have the expertise to diagnose food sensitivites. Also, eliiminate all food additives, meaning no boxed and convenience meals, no artificial sweeteners, etc. Cook from scratch. It is well worth your time in terms of health and prevention.

I have my own business in wellness education so feel free to contact me and I would be happy to share my resources with you. Good luck. In health, D.

When my son was born he went through the same sort of thing.I finally took the advice of a friend and took him to a chiropractor and after the first visit he was a totally different baby. He is now 2 and I still take him in about 3 or 4 times a year.

She's much too young for boredom. It could be colic or she could be building up gas. Have you noticed if her belly is kind of hard? Gas drops are helpful. With my son, I would hold him so that his tummy was on my shoulder. No, not very comfortable for you but if you are on the couch propped up, it's not too bad. That would always calm him with the pressure and warmth from my shoulder. Also, at 13 weeks, you should still be able to swaddle her tightly. That may help, too.

Colic is a different story. You should talk to your pediatrician for some options.

HI A.,
When my son was the same age he was also very fussy. I was lucky if he would sleep 20 minutes out of a day and like you I had tried everything. Finally I noticed one day while drying my hair the sound of the blow dryer was calming him down, so I got the idea of recording on a cassett the sound of the blow dryer and the vacuum. I would put him in his swing and play back the noises and he would fall asleep. Something about the white noise seem to calm him. I hope this helps. Good luck and hang in there, your daughter will get past this stage.
L.

Have you read up about colic? Sounds like it might be that.

Hi A.,
Your baby could be gassy. I know it sounds odd, but we had one of our twins that was so gassy all the time. You can buy gas drops and give them to her a little bit and see if that helps or you can also "fart her" as we call it. By bringing her knees up to her belly and push slighlty. I like the rocking too, where you bring her knees up and rock her from side to side. Hopefully that's all it is, because it could also be something like acid refelx or colic. But that's something you would have to talk to your doctor about.

A.,

If you're nursing and eat a lot of dairy it could be giving her a tummy ache. It was around this age my son would start to cry and just couldn't get comfortable. Our doctor suggested altering things in my diet to discover if it was the source of his problem.

If it's gas you can give her Milicon drops that will help break it up. In our family these were wonder drops!

Also, check with your doctor as it could be Colic.

I know it's hard as a new mom to figure out what's upsetting your little angel. Don't forget, to her, you are her greatest comfort. Though this will weigh on your nerves after awhile. This too shall pass. Good luck and hang in there.

I would try mylicon drops and see if she has bad gas. I know listening to a baby cry alot can be frustrating so if you need to, just put her in her crib and take 5 minutes for yourself. Babies can pick up when we are tense so even though it would be hard to walk away from the baby crying, it could be the best in the long run. Also, did you try the football hold? Have you given her a cold teether to bite on, I know it doesn't seem like her teeth could be bothering her, but you never know. Do you think it could be her ears? Good luck!

Have you tried gas drops?

A.-
This sounds like my son when he was about that age. He has a horrible colic. Absolutely NOTHING made him happy!! I was breastfeeding at the time and his doctor actually had me suppliment in formula. He wasn't very good at nursing so we eventually just went to formula only. We tried many different formulas and the only one that gave relief was Simlilac Alimentum. It's kind of pricey but I didn't mind. Are you nursing him?
Something else that helped when he would wake up crying was to lay him on my belly, it would always calm him down and once he was back to sleep I would lay him back down. His swing was also a favorite.

Good luck! Let me know if you would like more information. :)

Perhaps she's going through a growth spurt? She could have gas? Possible food allergy?
It's so hard when they're so tiny and yet so frustrated.
Do you have a sling? You could try wearing her in the sling..sometimes the security of being near mom can help.

I would think it could be many of the things other moms have already mentioned. Try some gas drops and if your are nursing watch what you are eating. For a little 'instant' relief, pick up an exercise ball(one of those big giant balls)! When she starts up hold her in your arms, sit on the ball (CAREFULLY) and bounce. Start out bouncing kind of hard and slow it as she relaxes. The nurses where I had my son recommended this and it was AMAZING. I dont know how we would have made it through infantcy without it! It immediately turned any fussing right off! Your legs get a work out too! Good luck!

The biggest thing s for you to stay calm even though the baby isnt. My daughter was the same way, and would scream and scream. The doctor said nothing was wrong with her physically so I was just like you.... I had no clue what to do. I got the book "The happiest baby on the block" and let me tell you, that book was a lifesaver!!! If you ever get really frustrated with her, gently lay her in her crib and leave the room for a few minutes. It doesnt hurt them to cry, but there have been so many cases where parents got so upset, that they shook their babies (I know... how terrible is that!) Its the biggest thing in her getting calmed down is for you to stay calm because she can feel when you get upset, she can sense your stress. Get the book from the library, its easy to read and will save your sanity lol. I hope it helps hun and let me know how it goes ok? God Bless!

Usually by twelve weeks babies seem to settle down, well my three did any way. Maybe she is starting to teethe. my middle child is a late teether. And is going through the same whinge, bad sleeping etc. Try rubbing some teething gel on her gums (check the age as I am not sure when you can start using it). Or try some baby pain relief medicine. I always give this ago if i tried everything else (last resort only) and they are still completely out of character, they may have ear aches teeth pain, you just never know and they can't tell you. Just an idea!

The other alternative I have is that she may have reflux/ or colic. try using phone books at one end to prop her cot on an angle and sit her up more in a swing or bouncer, giving her time to digest her food a little more.

Good luck, sometimes these things are just a behaviour phase, (learning to deal with new stimuli), phases they eventually grow out of, apparently when they have their own kids.

My kids fussed because of gas. We used to do some leg maneuvering to get them to pass it. Hard to describe but I'll try. Holding the feet, straighten one leg while gently pushing the other up to he body, then switch legs, then straighten both, then push both up to the body. That last push often was the passing. We'd repeat it several times before success, and of course it didn't always work. We also added a song to the pattern, for entertainment. I'll leave that up to you. Hang in there!

If you're sure it's not a medical problem. You may get some good ideas from The Happiest Baby on the Block by Dr. H. Karp. He's got some really good ideas that work. I think the website is the same name as the book.

Also, I encourage you not to grab onto the frustration your baby feels - they so quickly pick up our moods and anxiety. If you can remain calm and just be glad that you are able to be there for your baby - even when you think nothing else is working, at least she knows you are there for her.

By 13 weeks your baby should be getting over colic; colic usually peaks between weeks six and seven and is gone by the end of month three - you should be just about there (my little girl had colic - she got fussy around noon, and from around 5 p.m. to 2 or 3 a.m. she cried and cried and cried and cried...; I barely remember the first three months of her life - she is now one of the happiest babies you'll ever meet, go figure).

First, have you taken her to the pediatrician to check for an ear infection? I have NEVER regretted taking my child to the pediatrician, even when she wasn't actually sick - the peace of mind - knowing that she's just fussy - was worth it! While you're there, you might also the Dr. to check for the gastrointestinal problems - acid reflux can be tough on a kid. If she's on formula, my ped. recommended Good Start - it's the easiest to digest and sometimes helps fussy babies.

If she's not sick... 13 weeks is tough in terms of entertainment, because they usually can't do much but are on the verge of doing so much more. And in the middle of the night, you aren't in the mood to put on a puppet show. In those circumstances, perhaps the best thing you can try are the various soothing techniques described in other responses. And, while I wasn't strong enough to do it, Dr.s have said that it's not too early to let her cry it out at night if you can. I tried it - it didn't work for me, but many parents swear by it.

Dealing with the boredom... I bought so many toys those weeks, and she couldn't use any of them! She did a few weeks later though, when she got the whole grasping thing. One thing I did to encourage her development was buy little hang-toys with chimes in them, so when she batted at them it made a pretty little "tinkle" sound, encouraging her to do it again. TinyLove makes this really cool hanging-link rabbit that I got at babies-r-us for around $5 or $6. At about four months (just a couple weeks away), my daughter really got into her exersaucer. Some babies also like a jumperoo.

The one thing you can count on - she will grow up and this will end!

It could be gas. I used baby gas drops and it helped a lot. Good luck!

at 13 weeks, she is probably not bored.... at that age they can play with their own fingers for hours, but she may be teething... check her gums, usually the bottom ones in the center come first..... they will be warm and hard to the touch. Also, common with teething are ear infections, since inflammation narrows the already small eustacean tubes that drain the ears. Try an over the counter teething gel. Check with the pediatrician or family doctor about giving infant ibuprofen or tylenol for the discomfort if that is the case. Rare is the infant that age who fusses for no reason.

The other thing to consider, as this is an age of rapid growth, is that she may be simply waking up hungry. She may need more nursing at bedtime, or introducing some cereal (rice, soy, oatmeal, barley, any single grain cereal) at the last feeding of the day may help. good luck, L.

Hello- I am a mother of three boys ages, 21, 15, and 9. Our middle son started doing things similar to what you wrote about and I took him to the pediatrician for a check up, he had a double ear infection. Ear infections can cause great discomfort in babies much like what you described. I would have her checked by a doctor. There are also over the counter ear drops you can buy for ear discomfort- just talk with a pharmacist and they can point you in the right direction. It has been my experience that 13 week old babies simply do not wake up and cry and kick because they are bored. I would encourage you to find a cd or cassette of soothing music (if you don't already have one) music is very calming to babies. All 3 of my boys would go to bed each evening with soothing music playing. It helped them to relax and feel secure. I hope this helps. Please keep me posted. Peace and Prayers, B.

Hi A. - Congratulations! I'm so happy for you and your lovely daughter, it is an amazing thing to watch children grow! I'm sure you'll love it.

Babies that are that small don't get frustrated or bored, their little brains can only process how they feel and let you know something is bothering them. She may be growing faster and be hungrier. She may be responding to some new food (?) you've been trying, she may just be sorting things out about sleeping. I have a good friend with a new baby who has one of those bouncy seats that vibrate and her daughter loves that soothing jiggle. They've also found she like to sit/sleep in their laundry room - noise, probably is soothing. I'd be sure the dryer was well vented before I do that, though!

Once you're sure that she's not wet or has a bubble or needs to eat (not just a little, but really seems hungry) I'd settle her back down and put her back to bed. Hopefully she'll quiet on her own and snooze off. Hopefully. I know I felt like a zombie for the first six months of my son's life with lack of sleep - hope you get lots again soon. Do you have a cd player in her room or an ambient sound thing? That might help, too. Beth

At 13 weeks it's highly unlikely that your baby is getting bored in the middle of the night. If she's kicking and drawing up her legs then it's almost asuredly her tummy. If you're breastfeeding than make sure you are avoiding gassy foods like broccoli and carbonate drinks. The LaLecheLeague is a great resource for more info! If you are bottle feeding, check to make sure you are minimizing air intake and don't let her suck after the bottle is empty. Milicon is good for gas. I also found that when my baby was fussy sometimes she hadn't gotten a full burp out from the previous feeding because she'd fall asleep too fast.

Double check that she's not hungry or wet of course and after doing what you can for the possibility of gas, employ your comfort measures (some babies are calmed by gentle music and certainly by your closeness) but if holding her only makes her angrier, keep trying to figure out what's wrong. She's trying to tell you something by her cries. This is the only way she has to communicate so don't give up! I understand that it can be frustrating and if you need to step away and put her in the crib to cry for a few minutes than that is always better than letting the frustration get to you. Your persistence during this trying time will pay off. There is some GREAT advice on this list... Happiest Baby of the Block and what not... Hang in there!

My first daughter was similar... she had colic. You could PM me if you are interested and I can share some things that helped. The bottom line is it passes :) Hang in there!

Dr Brazelton does a great job explaining how babies this age can get overstimulated. He has some great suggestions in his "Touchpoints: The Essential Reference, YOur Child's Emotional and Behavioral Development" But it usually begins to fade around 12 weeks, you may want to get her checked out by a doctor as crying and sleep problems can be a sign of an ear infection.

My older daughter went through this at this age as well. I do think she was bored and frustrated. My theory is that she was awake and alert enough to know that she could not get around, make her arms or legs move the way that she wanted, etc. Before this time, she was still sleeping all the time. As soon as she gained some control and began rolling over the fussiness stopped, but until then she was absolutely inconsolible in the evenings from about 4 pm until 10 or 11 pm. My younger daughter was diagnosed with acid reflux at 3 weeks old, so you can probably rule that out as yours is 13 weeks already.

My suggestion is read the book, get support from others, and know that eventually this stage will pass. Sometimes children begin to regress right before a growth spurt or other spurt of development, so maybe she is getting ready to do something new!

Hi A.,
I am a chiropractor and I have seen many babies who are like this. Like the other responses have suggested, there may be an issue with "colic". There are many questions that need to be asked but let me just direct you to some information if you'd like. First, let me tell you that babies need chiropractic care just like adults. They don't get back pain, but they do get interference to their nervous system. Mostly this is caused from the birth process or any other type of injury. If she is fussy her nervous system may be irritated and that is how she responds to it. I have seem many babies who's mothers complain of this and after a few adjustment they are totally different babies. They are happier and sleep better. Here are some websites to check out: www.MCPAkids.org and www.icpa4kids.org
Good luck. If you want more information, just let me know. -Dr. Heather S., O'Dell Family Chiropractic, Lathrup Village, ###-###-####

You didn't give us a lot of info except that you are stressed out about this. If she's breastfed, are you putting her to the breast when she tells you or on some kind of formula-type schedule? She should be fed on demand regardless of what system people might recommend. If she's on formula, is she allergic to what she's taking? Is she gassy? Is there stress in your life (besides her fussiness, I mean)?

Babies change and grown continually, so their demeanor and sleep patterns change too, and usually this stuff is temporary. Keeping a positive attitude, being sympathetic to her, just holding her even if she continues to fuss, soothing her with your voice and/or calming music, rhythmic movements, or anything else you can think of. Some babes like a warm bath & some hate that if they're upset. It's quite common for babies to sleep more for awhile and then change that. Most are awake every few hours for months and months, or even years & years. She's growing and can't help what's happening, but if you can learn to take it in stride, you'll both be better off. I'd put mine in a sling and clean house, do dishes & laundry, and sometimes I'd look down and she'd be asleep - Hooray! Take it easy, Mom. Some day this all be only a blip in your family's life story. G. B.

A.,
My heart goes out to you! My second son was colicky and after trying just about everything you can think of to find the cause we ended up having to just ride it out and make him as comfortable as possible. Just rest in the knowledge that this isn't forever and before you know it it won't be an issue anymore (although I'm sure that can't be soon enough!)
Anyway here are some of the things we did that seemed to help. He always seemed to do better outside in the fresh air and those outside noises. We dragged his baby swing out on the porch or sometimes out in the yard and put him in it. Sometimes we would put his bouncy seat on the washing machine while it was running (always standing right there holding the seat of course!) and the vibrations seemed to soothe him. Sometimes I would hold him close and sit on the foot of the bed with my feet on the floor and just bounce gently up and down.
One last suggestion when you've been with a crying baby for any length of time you tend to tense up and babies can sense that. When we took our birthing class they taught us how to relax our bodies starting with your feet and mentally relaxing everything all the way to the top of your head. That seemed to help too, I would do this while I rocked the baby forcing myself to relax and he would seem to mellow out after awhile too.
And when all else fails just walk the floor with him till he wears out and goes to sleep, which he eventually will. Hope this helps!

You need to find out what's bothering her. It sounds like she may have colic or something like that. I would check this out with your doctor....something is definately bothering her.

Could she be teething?

Learning from a 17 week old there are a few things we found. She actually could be sick, going through a growth spurt and needs to eat more, or not napping enough during the day. When our son doesn't nap he can kick and scream for quite a long time. Good luck. The good always outweighs the bad.

When my daughter was little like that nothing helped except running water, my husband and I would lay her naked on the floor by the bathroom door and run the tub faucet. Sometimes we would actually sit in the tub with her and let it run, it was weird I know but it worked wonderfully. As she got older she would play in the running water she out grew it at like 6 months old, I know it felt like forever! But when you are desperate you will do about anything. She is almost 16 and just as cranky as ever, I dont think she really outgrew that! But I hope that will help out, I have also heard to run the dryer and put her in a bouncy seat on top of it. I dont know if that really works personally, but I know people that have tried it. Good luck to you and God bless!

I'm sure you've heard from other moms and even your doctor that babies go through growth spurts quite often in their first year. When they go through one they eat a lot more often and either sleep more or act up more. Of course, there is the teething thing. Thirteen weeks is a little early but some babies teeth at 4 months and it takes a few weeks for that darn tooth to break through. Try to remember this line "this too shall pass".
Good luck!
J.