Funny Things Kids Say.... - Reston,VA

Updated on October 31, 2011
C.O. asks from Reston, VA
17 answers

Monday's are half-days are our elementary school so the kids are home by 1:15PM.

We had brought down all the Halloween rubbermaid containers over the weekend - making sure costumes fit, etc....so the boxes are (were) stacked neatly in the family room.....notice I said WERE....

I go outside to help Bob with the decorations (we have a skeleton we hang from a tree) and the tombstones...I come back inside and all THREE boxes/containers are tossed - like the house was ransacked!! I gasp! Put my hands to my face and my son Greg (age 11) says:

"Breathe mommy- breathe!!! I'll clean it up! Breathe!!! Now repeat after me "I love my children, I love my children, I love my children"

Oh my word!! I had to laugh!!! Your kids do or say anything funny today?!

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Featured Answers

B.S.

answers from Lansing on

Smart boy. Ha ha!

My 4 year old went on a farm field trip this past Friday. My husband went with her.

The people running the farm asked the kids "Do any of you drink cows milk?"
My daughter replies "No I drink grocery milk"

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☆.A.

answers from Pittsburgh on

My son referred to a girl in his class as a "Drama Queen" (to me) after she had a meltdown at the class party because "there were noooooooo yelllllllow poppers left!"
MY son walked over, silently handed her his yellow popper, grabbed a green O. and walked away. LOL

3 moms found this helpful

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A.C.

answers from Jacksonville on

My 4 yr old and I were looking at a costume catolog and she said I should be the nurse. I told her it was too sexy for mommy to wear out in public, I respect my body, blah blah blah. Today she tells me she's glad she is batgirl beause she does NOT want to be walking around all flexy! I died...but at least I don't have to worry about her repeating that word. Noone will know flexy really means sexy. Lol :)

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V.W.

answers from Jacksonville on

My 13 yr old was reclined on his bed doing an online class. I went in to check on him and sign in with my password. I had to sort of lean over him to reach the keyboard. I stand back up, he smiles and says "can you lean over here again?" I do it. My hair (I have longish hair) drapes in front of him, he sticks his hand up and slaps at it. And just giggles.
I guess you had to be there. lol

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L.L.

answers from Rochester on

My 18 month old doesn't talk very clearly yet. (Compared to her sister, who was basically fluent at that age.) She does pop off some hilarious things, though...

Grandma and Grandpa are visiting from SC (rare treat, once or twice a year) and Grandma was tickling the 18 month old...baby crosses her arms over her body and yells,

"This is MY body!!!" and this is the baby who doesn't really talk yet...words here and there, animal sounds, etc. I love it. It's hilarious.

3 moms found this helpful

R.D.

answers from Richmond on

HAHAHA AWWWW!!

I totally forgot that it was Halloween this morning. Emmy and Madison popped out of their room all smiles... when they didn't get a reaction, Emmy says 'Mom, isn't there something you want to say to us?' I was confused and said 'Put your school clothes on?' Madison shakes her head and mumbles 'she needs coffee', then Emmy said 'Let's just say it together' and they yelled

HAPPY HALLOWEEEEEN!! [with jazz hands, LOL!!]

3 moms found this helpful

C.M.

answers from St. Louis on

That is really cute!!!

Friday I was raking the leaves in our backyard for a leaf pile for my kids to jump into. I mentioned "we need a leaf blower to get all these into a pile" to which my four year old replies "okay" and gets down on her hands and knees and starts blowing on the leaves!!!!

3 moms found this helpful

A.H.

answers from Tulsa on

My four year old son and I were visiting one of my co workers today and my son had to use the bathroom. So as I'm waiting on him, he yells at the top of his lungs, "Mom, I'm good at wiping the pee off!" We both died laughing. And then as soon as he came out of the bathroom, he walked into their bedroom and said, "Wow, Mom, they have an awesome bedroom. It's full of good colors!" He put on quite a show today!

2 moms found this helpful
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E.J.

answers from Lincoln on

I'm going to have to go with a story that happened to me when I was volunteering at my son's school... not my kid, but just as funny. I had car issues for about a month and I was biking my son to school. We get there and it goes like this:

Little boy: Where's your car?

Me: In the shop.

Little boy: Do you have a husband?

I'll laugh about that one for a while!!! My son hasn't done anything humorous lately that sticks out at me. :-)

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B.J.

answers from Kansas City on

My 3 year old niece and 7 year old nephew were sitting at the counter eating. The 3 yo (girl) said, "Aunt Sis is the boss of this house." The 7 yo (boy) said, "No she isn't, Uncle Larry is the boss. He makes the money." The 3 yo said, "No he isn't. He's just a suck-up." My husband and I were listening and laughed till we cried. Kids are great!

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M.M.

answers from Washington DC on

AHAHAHAHA Oh he is so funny.

Today we were at Lowe's looking for odds and ends and my 14 yo daughter, who is homeschooled and is VERY naive and sheltered, puts a flower pot on her head upside down and says Look!! I'm a Pothead.
I thought my 16 ,who is at the public high school, was going to pee her pants.

2 moms found this helpful

I.X.

answers from Los Angeles on

my three year old fell down the stairs (only the last few). Unsure of what the thumping sound was I asked her if she fell down the stairs. She responds "I not break my ankle!"
I have no idea where that came from.

2 moms found this helpful

E.M.

answers from St. Joseph on

yesterday my 2 1/2 year old looked at me and said, "Mama, I love your face!" I thought it was a pretty cool thing to say!

1 mom found this helpful

C.M.

answers from Johnson City on

I guess we have too much technology sometimes. I was trying to explain to my then 3 year old son that we could look up the answer to a question he had, meaning in a book. He interrupts me before I'm done with the sentence "But, Mom, we're driving, you can't google anything right now!"

Then there was the time he was trying to explain to his uncle that he had just shut his "winger" in the bathroom door at daycare. He still had tears on his face and my poor brother nearly panicked and was ready to scoop him up and run to the doctor. He asked my son what did Miss Tasha do? He tearfully holds up his finger and says she kissed it and put a bandaid on it. "See, isn't it cool?"

My daughter does not like shopping, never has had the patience for it. In fact, her first sentence was spoken rather vehemently from the shopping cart. "Mama, I go!!"

1 mom found this helpful
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C.P.

answers from Albuquerque on

Hmm, not today, but recently yes! My almost-3-year-old comes up with some crazy things sometimes!
Last weekend I was putting up some "scary" decorations on the porch for Halloween and after it got dark I asked her out to look at it. She said, "mama, that's not very scary. it's just a little scary." Then the noise maker came on (sounds like howling wolves) and she started backing away slowly. She says "ok, mama, that WAS scary. I'm walking away now... walking away..."
Or, a few days ago, we were having a talk about the differences between boys & girls. I asked her what's the difference between girls & boys. She thinks about it for a minute and says "girls have boobs!" I said, "that's right, and what about boys?" She thinks, and thinks, and finally says "boys have tattoos!" (I suppose in her world this is true: daddy & grampa have a tattoo but mama & grandma don't!) We were having this talk after I caught her trying to pee in her potty standing up!

I keep notes of these things in her "baby journal" because I want to remember all these cute and funny things!

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Your son is funny!
He knows... women already!
Too hilarious.

My kids tell me to take a time-out... when I am stressed.

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L.C.

answers from Dover on

Well, not yet today, but there's still time. This weekend, however, my daughter (4 yo) was sitting at the table while I cooked and said, "Mommy, when I grow up and be like you and Jack grows up and be's like daddy, Jack won't have any hair." Daddy's bald.

My 5 yo son also told me "the spaghetti isn't gonna cook itself."

1 mom found this helpful
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