For Those Who Have Nannies.....

Updated on March 23, 2011
S.J. asks from Cherryville, MO
7 answers

I have some questions for those that have nannies. I hope you ladies can help!

1) Why did you decide to hire one?
2) Do both you and hubby work (full, part, hours)?
3) Do you regret hiring one and now wish you hadn't for whatever reason, and why?
4) What types of things does your nanny do for you?
5) What does nanny do for you that you absolutely love and couldn't be without? Is she (or I suppose he) super helpful?
6) How did you find the right nanny for you?
7) Do your kids love her and do you feel she/he enriches your children(s)' lives?

EDIT: ONE MORE! - What do you do when nanny is sick?

Thanks!!

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M.M.

answers from Chicago on

1. Before I gave birth to my first. I knew I'd be going back to work full time.
2. Yes. both full.
3. No. LOVE HER. My kids love her. She's been great for them!
4. Take the kids to classes (park district), takes them out to play or do *something* out of the house every single day for most of the day, does their laundry 2x/week, loads/unloads our dishwasher. Occasionally vaccuums if she has time.
5. She teaches our kids. Everything. They've learned manners, patience, language (English AND Spanish), numbers, beginning to write, stop lights....everything. She's potty training our son! (3). She has the patience to sit down and really teach them things that I don't necessarily have the time to do.
6. She was a referral. Her sister nannies for friends of ours. And she was the only person we interviewed!
7. They ADORE her. She is the only person my 7mos on stretches her arms out to be held by.

If you can get past feeling "uncomfortable" with someone else "raising" your kids (which isn't really true), the right nanny will turn into a family member for your kiddos. Mine are excited to see her every day, and I never ever question anything she wants to do with them. She's more protective of them than I am! I trust her completely to love, protect and teach them as I would.

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R.D.

answers from Richmond on

I hope this helps, not from my personal experience, but because my brother's ex GF (that I'm still very close to) used to nanny and au pair...

She always had a list of questions for the people interviewing her. They asked their questions, she asked hers, things like their overall expectations, what they're looking to get out of having a nanny, what the children are allergic to (if anything), how much tv they do or do not permit, etc... She also had a list of things that she was NOT willing to do, not because she was lazy by any meaning, but because she wanted the potential employers (which is what you will be) to be aware of certain things... like she would not take the children to the pediatrician (unless it was an emergency) and she would not go to parent teacher conferences because she felt very strongly that was the parents place.

Even if a parent was home, she knew she was working. It wasn't just babysitting for her, it was raising smart and healthy children and helping the parents maintain a happy and healthy household for those kids. She did some light housework, ran the vacuum, wiped down the kitchen after preparing meals, etc.

She was always very respectful if something wasn't working out for the parents, and she always communicated if she didn't feel like she was the right fit for those parents or children. Communication is key.

She always met with the kids, free of charge, the first few times so the kids (and parents) could get comfortable with her, and so she could see how the parents interacted with the kids... just to get a feel for the house rules and the way they disciplined.

She was more of an in-home daycare than a nanny, in my opinion. She's absolutely wonderful!! Good luck and best wishes... I think, like anything else, it's trial and error, but you'll know you've got a good nanny when you can 'feel it'. Trust your gut. Don't hesitate to ask questions. My bro's ex would not take a job when people didn't ask questions and really outline their expectations.

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P.R.

answers from Cleveland on

1) my husband is obsessed with work and I have to be at my job early so I knew daycare would be a constant battle over who was going to take our children in the mornings. We can afford a nanny and it seemed more appealing at the time than having the children not get 1:1 attention. I feel horribly guilty for working... I knew sick days wouldn't be an issue with a nanny - arguing who would stay home etc. It seemed closer to having me home to have a nanny than use daycare. Also, I didn't want to have to deal w/ packing a lunch every day etc. I love that meals can be tailored at the time and if the kids don't feel just right some days, they don't have to still rush out the door. Until my oldest started K, they woke-up whenever they wanted...
2) we both work full time
3) don't regret it ever. I will say we're fortunate that we can afford the nanny and preschool. So we didn't have to give up socialization or structured learning.
4) in the beginning, the nanny did all the laundry and childcare/related cleaning up. Now that our children are in school a lot, she does more cleaning, all the grocery shopping and a good amount of dinner prep. She also does short walks with our dog.
5) everything... She's certainly not perfect but overall she's very helpful and cleans things like the blinds that I never even knew about. She'll do a bit of sewing without being asked. She does some ironing I never knew about either. She's also there for deliveries or home repairs so i don't have to run home from work! Priceless!
6) we used an agency. Now that i know about local mother's clubs, I'd have at least tried that route as it's much cheaper.
7) my children definitely love her. They do prefer me still but they did say the other day she's more fun than me and my husband (definitely true about me. She plays like I would never have the patience to do.)

Hope that helps.

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H.W.

answers from Portland on

Can I just write a happy note about the wonderful guy that takes care of my son after preschool? ( I refuse to call him a 'manny'.) He's like a part-time nanny, except that I need him NOT to be at our home, because I teach there. In answer to your questions:

1.I needed childcare for my son, as my preschool ends after his does. I needed someone to pick up Kiddo, and keep him until 4, so I could close/clean up my preschool, prep for the next day, and have a little down time.

2. My husband works full time; I work part time until 2, Tues-Thurs, 9-1 on Fridays.

3.No regrets at all! My life would suck without childcare!

4. What does the 'nanny' do for me? He takes my son to great places around town, out for little adventures to the local science musuem, to the fish hatchery, to various parks. He loves my little boy, and knows what his interests are, and encourages them. He works with my son on his social skills, on being a kind player and a considerate person. He's taught him how to blow his nose. (For which, I do not have enough money to express my gratitude!) His time with my child is focused on my child-- THAT's what I am paying for.

5. I couldn't do without the opportunity my son has to make a deep attachment bond with another male besides my husband. I think this sort of balance in his life is important. He has Mama and his preschool teachers are female; otherwise, it would be just Daddy as a male influence. I also love that our caregiver has a kindergarten-aged daughter and we all refer to them as "psuedo siblings". Both of them are only children, and this is a good opportunity for them to experience a bit of the life of a sibling, because they do have to put up with each other!

6. I was lucky. Our caregiver is my neighbor, and my dear friend's Stay at Home husband. We started swapping care last summer, and he and my son just got along great. I was needing childcare, offered him a generous hourly wage (because I knew I was getting quality) and we drew up a small contract. That was it!

7. Yes, my son adores him. He often wants to go visiting at the nanny's house and to stop by just to say hi. I think he really has a great relationship with him. I know that there's a lot of experiential education and discipline involved, he's not getting spoiled. He's being parented by another loving adult. We are so incredibly blessed to have him! I'm done with teaching for a while as of June... life without our daily contact with our caregiver is going to be a huge adjustment. Thank goodness we're all just across the street from each other!

What a great question! You make me appreciate *all* the people who love on my son so much more.:)

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T.L.

answers from Wichita on

1. We have 5 children, 2 are in school & the youngest are 6-month old twins. We hired one after fighting the daycare battle for 7 yrs. Our 2nd child has ADD & impulse issues & we were constantly getting phone calls to come pick him up. We hired one for these reasons & the ease of her coming to our house.
2. Yes, we both work full time.
3. No, I do not regret at any moment hiring one.
4. Our nanny does childcare first, then if she has time she can pick up the house, dishwasher & some laundry.
5. I love that she is so flexible. She will ask if I need anything before she leaves - bottles made, a load of laundry thrown in, etc. She is very helpful, she will help to pick up the kids from school if needed & take them to the Dr. if for some reason we could not.
6. I joined care.com to find her. We interviewed her, checked her references, then let her spend an afternoon with them while we were there to see how she interacted with the kids.
7. My kids love her, she disciplines the same as we would. She interacts with the older children well - she will read books & do preschool worksheets to help with learning. She is the same faith as us, so it helps with understanding our family.
8. We have not had an instance when she has been sick, but have had her on vacation twice. Either I have taken the day off (my husband works alot!) or this week she is gone & the kids are on spring break so we have shifted some time with other families in the church or our neighbor girls.
Please feel free to contact me if you have any other questions, I love her & would recommend a nanny to anyone.

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I.D.

answers from Miami on

1. I work part time (8 am to 12 pm) and i needed someone to take care of my ds.....I'm a little paranoid so i didnt feel it was safe to take him to daycare being a baby...im so paranoid i leave him with his nanny over my mom's...there the nanny is watched by "my nanny" who is now my mom's housekeeper
2. My hubby works full time, me, part time
3. I dont regret. I did regret having a baby nurse for the first 4 months of my sons life....she drove me crazy because she thought she knew more than everyone else, and i didnt spent as much time with my baby because there was a "specialist" taking care of him, i dont regret the nanny because she is only 19 and she is not bossy or anything like the baby nurse.
4. my nanny takes care of my boy while im at work...in my moms house, so she plays with him changes his diaper etc...i bathe him before going to work....then when im out of work i stay with my baby at my moms, and my driver takes her to my house where she does the cleaning, laundry, etc f the entire house and dinner...when i get home me and hubby who gets here at 7 or so play with him bathe him and put him to sleep. my nanny lives in my house and get a weekend off every other weekend...
5. housework.....i hate cleaning, i hate washing and most of all i hate washing my dr browns bottles....
6. The trusted nanny of a friend recommended her
7. my son is only 9 months, i think he likes her, he likes to play with her cuz she is very young and has lots of energy..but he doesnt seem to adore her, in the other hand he goes crazy with the lady who used to be my nanny...my mom says shes got blood for the kids...
8. She has never been sick but in that case i would have to miss my job that day

Just remember to be with your son as much as you can.....even when i have a living in nanny i dont let her do my job of raising my son

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P.M.

answers from Tampa on

I was a Nanny.

My main job was taking care of the child
-next was picking up the house, but not actually CLEANING
- one family had me launder their cloth diapers
- I'd take the kids to playdates, parks, children museums, etc.

When I was sick, I"d try to get my sister or Mother to take care of the child(ren) for the day to allow me to recuperate.

Many of the children called me Mommy - tho the families I've kept in contact with, now they call me by name.

I guess you need to decide do you want an affectionate, loving Mother type personality (me) or a strict disciplinarian who is all work and no affection.

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