I'd love some thoughts or advice on what my doctor told me about sleep.
First of all, my doc specializes in pediatric sleep and is a neurologist, yet his advice has me more confused than ever.
He says for my baby's age (14.5 mos), she should sleep 10 hrs a night and take a 90-120 min nap. That I should wake her at the same time every morning and wake her from her nap until she starts to do it on her own. If she ends up crabby, then add more sleep back in. He says this helps consolidate sleep, and will help her sleep more deeply, and will prevent sleep problems down the road.
I am just curious, but right now I can get anywhere from 11 - 12 hours a night, and anywhere from a 1.5 - 3 hr nap! She IS however a VERY light sleeper. She will sometimes wake at night and play, or wake during her nap and go back to sleep. My Dr. says this will stop, and she will sleep better if I keep her on a stricter schedule with a bit less sleep.
She will sleep more deeply, and will stop waking at night to play and stop waking during her nap. I understand his point, but I am not sure I agree with it. Of course I do not want to set the stage for problems later on. He thinks she is waking more in the night than I realize, and that once she gets a bit older she is going to be calling for me to play, etc, when she is up.
Thoughts?
hi there! i did not follow this practice and my cousin did. I have to say her children are excellent sleepers and go down very easily for them. They followed the dr. advice exactly and didnt sway from it. Now they are 2 and 4 and they have no issues about sleep. I on the other hand...no more naps (41/2 and 3 yr old)and its a struggle at night to get them to bed. just stay consistant on whatever you chose to do. :) best of luck to you. Candice
Wow, that does sound pretty strict. I could never personally follow that. I also have a 14 month old daughter. She sleeps for 11-12 hours a night and takes either one 2 1/2 -3 hour nap a day or two 1 hour naps a day. She has the same routine for naps and bed and sleeps all the way through both naps and night. I think that every child differs in their need for sleep. One child may need the 12 hours while another may only need 10. I think you as the parent know your child and what she needs. If you think things are going well now, then don't change them. I think they change their sleep patterns enough on their own withour us interfering. Also, it can differ from day to day depending on if they are not feeling well...are you supposed to deprive them of sleep to stick to the schedule? As a mom, I think you just need to do what you think is best for you and your child. Good luck!
My son slept at that age from 9pm to 9am and sometimes even 9:30. with a 2 hour nap during the day. He is 20 months old now and is sleeping 9:30 pm to 8am. And still takes a two hour nap a day. I think every child is different and if you and your baby are comfortable with how much sleep your daughter is getting, then I think what you are doing is fine. Some babies need more sleep and some need less. Your baby sounds like my baby. I don't think my son is waking up in the middle of the night because when he does, he does make noise and cries out. And I can hear him wake up. My son wakes up at the same time every morning except when he was sick and not sleeping through the night. NOt sure if any of this helps or not. ;)
I feel that if what you're doing now is working for you, why change it? Yes, at some point she might wake more & want more attention. Or she may, naturally & on her own, start sleeping deeper & waking earlier. Why mess with a schedule that's working for you & her on the off-chance that there might be difficulties later?
I say relax & enjoy it :)
Don't wake that sleeping baby! If she wants to sleep 12 hrs/night, I say let her.
I DON'T side with your doctor because YOU know your child and her habits, and he is just speaking generally. So I would say that you should let her sleep if she wants to. She's 14 mos old - geez, she will have enough times in her life where she will have to be woken up with an alarm clock :) Let her enjoy her sleep. And you can enjoy 5 more minutes of relaxation. You MUST be a good mom, a devoted mom, if you are worried about your daughter's sleeping habits, and asking for advice, so give yourself a break. You deserve to relax. Good luck. AND OH! ONE MORE THING: If you daughter wakes up, plays, and is able to put herself back to sleep, THAT IS WONDERFUL. If she is able to do that now, she will be comfortable enough when she is older to do that too. That is a gift that she has to be able to put herself back to sleep. Don't listen to the doctor that she will be calling for you when she gets older to come play with her. Live in the day, don't worry about tomorrow. Most of the time the things we worry about never come to fruition.
Some of the things your doctor recommends have worked very well for me and my two kids. I did follow the consistent wake up time 7am...with only about 30 min flexiblitity if we happened to be out very late the night before. I also followed a consistent bedtime...around 7:30. I think at your daughter's age, both of my kids slept about 11 hours per night. Then the nap. I also couldn't agree more about waking up from nap. I aimed for 2 hours...again with an occasional 30 min later. I also always wake at 4pm regardless of what time the nap started. For example, yesterday, due to my older child's preschool field trip, my little guy didn't get down for his nap until about 2:40pm. Still woke him at 4. The reason is to preserve future sleep. From what I've read...there are two reasons to wake a sleeping baby/child....(1)very young or premature infant who needs to eat and (2) baby/young child to preserve future sleep. As a new mother, I referred to the book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth, also a pediatric sleep specialist. He says everything that your doctor did.
Now, my children are 5 and 2 1/2. The oldest goes to bed around 8 pm and wakes a little before 7am...but we've asked her to look at her clock and play quietly until 7:00. My youngest goes to bed around 7:30pm and is woken by his sister at 7:00...or wakes on his own a little before 7. My youngest also naps max 2 hours but the timing is flexible in the 12:45-4:00pm range.
I saw the other post wondering why the consult or whether it was part of a routine checkup. Good luck!
What prompted the consult?
Sleep requirements are highly individual, and your daughter's don't strike me as abnormal.
if she's just waking up to play and you don't have to go in and do anything i say let her be... my daughter did the same thing - we had this musical mobile thing that she could press the button on it's own and it projected onto the ceiling... sometimes i would hear it go on in the middle of the night, but unless she was crying i never went in there... if she's happy and not cranky when she wakes in the AM or from her nap. i'd say just let it be.... she'll figure it out on her own.
Hi I., Simply, I side with your doctor on this one. I would usually side with a mom's internal intuitive side, but I wish to gently point out to you your very own choice of words; "....but right now I CAN GET ...." indicating your perception that 'more is best'. I won't speculate here why you feel 'more is better' but perhaps you may ask yourself why having your child sleep longer is important to you....enough to seek validation from us 'strangers' versus a qualified sleep specialist. My vote is to listen to his advice, do as he says and see if her sleeping is in fact deeper, albeit shorter, which would be best for your child AND for you in the end. Happy parenting! Be Peace, Nz
Sometimes it's hard to trust what Dr's have to say. I would stick with their advice as best as you can, but if your daughter struggles then you should modify it to fit her sake. Go with it for at least a week, she may adjust slowly.
Also, if she wakes up in the middle of the night will she handle it if you just tell her it is not morning - go back to sleep? Our 12 month old wakes up and wants to play, but she is still tired - just thinks it's time - I tell her to go back to lay her head back down and get more rest and she sleeps until atleast 5:30am. ..
~Good Luck~
