Flower Girl Dress - Moorestown,NJ

Not rude at all. Actually, I would ask the bridal couple to pay for the dress. I wouldn't want to pay $130 or even half of that for a dress my child were going to wear only once. Target, Target.com, Walmart, Macy's etc all have very nice inexpensive or clearance priced formal dresses for little girls for only about $20.

Oh, I hate when people do this! Since you're the one having to shell out the $$, then you have every right to ask for a cheaper one.

My girls were flower girls in my brothers wedding. My SIL picked out $250 dollar dresses, and I needed 2!! NO WAY!

So I asked her if I found something similar and cheaper, if that would be okay, she said sure.

I found $170 dollar dresses for $19 EACH at Burlington. THOSE were the dresses they used!!

David's Bridal has lots of really nice dresses cheaper. Like people said, I'd search for a very similar dress and then present it to the bride and see if it's ok. I'd phrase it as "I found this other dress which is very similar. Would that be ok? I completely understand if not but if that's the case, I'm really sorry but we won't be able to have Mary be your flower girl. It's just out of our budget." Look at it this way - she asked someone she's not close with at all to be in her wedding. She's checking the box of having a cute little flower girl. Then she picks an expensive dress for YOU to pay for. Who's the rude one here?

Absolutely you should ask! It's not like she's a bridesmaid and has to match several other dresses. Some cities have places you can rent a flower girl dress for $20-$50 and the bride could still pick the style she liked.

I would take the picture to a bridal shop (David's bridal is pretty inexpensive) and see if they have something comparable that might be less expensive. My daughter was asked to be the flower girl for my sister's wedding, and my sister took into account that we would be paying for our airfare to the wedding, so found her dress at David's with the coordinating flower girl dress (which was around $75 normally, but when I ordered it it was on sale for $50! Bonus!!).

What does your husband think? Can you afford the dress? You might think it's ugly, but it's not your wedding.

If you and your husband agree you can not afford the dress, let the bride know.....she may be willing to foot the bill or part of it and remember there will be shoes possibly tights needed as well.

Yes it would be rude of you to ask if YOU can pick out a different dress.

"an ugly one at that.....she won't be able to wear it again".....I sense a little anamosity going on here. Of course you child could wear that dress again, unless you wait until she grows out of it. She's 3, it could be altered if it's a long dress or you could put it in a resale shop or donate it. Doesn't sound like your too happy about this wedding. Have you served as a bridesmaid/matron in any weddings that your husband hasn't been a groomsman? Did you and he have the wedding of your dreams?

If your husband is looking forward to this and wants to show off your daughter, don't rain on their parade.

Blessings....

Just call the bride and let her know that you can't afford to spend that much for a dress for your 3 year old. Ask her if it is okay if you search for a similar dress or if you need to decline the offer to be flower girl.

I vote on the side of the responders that say try to find the dress for a cheaper price or even look for a dress that has a similar style for a lower price. It isn't practical for most to spend $130 on a dress for a 3 year old. I wouldn't suggest you ask the bride since this may add further stress to her plate.

I would definitely have husband mention that the price for the dress is out of your budget but you will try to find something identical. If you can find a dress maker you may be able to get it made for less or not depending on the detail workmanship going into the dress.

I think it is pretty rude to ask for such an expensive dress if you as the bride aren't willing to pick up the expense. Get pictures of the dress and shop around for a cheaper price for that dress. It is what I would do.

Not your wedding, she may have fallen in love with this dress and planned her whole wedding around it. I have seen that before.

If you cannot afford the dress then let her know you are going to have to back out. Otherwise, that's not a huge amount. I know it is a lot but some of the dresses I sell in the store I work in are well over $300. They are Mon Cheri's with actual Swarovski crystals and tons of hand beading though.

Most of our dresses are Lida brand and around $150. I would say that since it is a wedding the dresses are going to cost more, especially if they come from a bridal salon.

How about posting a link to the dress? That would be fun to see if everyone else thinks it's ugly!!

I would just tell the bride-to-be that because of budgetary concerns you can't do a $130 dress but you would be happy to find something suitable for less that you can better afford. Or since this is hubby's friend, enlist his help in talking with them. I know what people are saying about sucking it up since you agreed to it, but really, it was hubby who agreed to it (did he not check with you first?) and probably had no idea that they would want her to wear a $130 dress. When I got married, my cousin's daughter was 3 and was a flower girl - I already had the bridesmaids dresses picked out and she knew my color scheme, and she was able to find a dress for her daughter for $30. It was white with a sash the same color as the bridesmaids dresses and she was able to use for her more occasions than just that one time - so she definitely got her money's worth!

Ugh. I hate situations like this. But frankly, if you accepted "the position" of your daughter being flower girl without asking anything about the cost or price of the dress up front, then I sort of think you just need to suck it up. If you blindly accept the job, without asking questions, you get what comes with it... is sort of how I look at it.
Yeah... I think it is a lot to spend for a 3 yr old to wear just the one time. But I probably wouldn't have agreed to let my 3 yr old be the flower girl either, because I would EXPECT it to be a ridiculous priced dress that would never be worn again. And don't forget: shoes. :)

Sorry.

No, it's not rude if you do it right. I would talk to the bride and say that $130 is out of your budget, and then discuss what is in your budget. If the bride is unwilling to work with you then politely bow out.

There was a lovely website with all sorts of nice flower girl dresses in the $50 range. I know because my SD was asked to be in her aunt's wedding and her aunt picked out an ugly dress that was $150! Even though we guided her to the website she wanted THAT particular dress for her niece so she picked up the difference.

Don't plan on her wearing the dress again, it probably won't happen. But talk with your hubby about your budget and then discuss that with the bride (who should have discussed your budget with you ahead of time). Don't forget shoes!

Hmmm, I wonder if you could try to find the same dress at a reduced price? When I got married I used a website called "The Unforgettable Bride" where they were able to obtain the dress I wanted for several hundreds of dollars less. I think my sister used the same website to get her FG's dress. Good luck!

I think that $130 is a TON to spend on a 3 yr old's dress, to be used once, but I don't really think that you can ask for a different one.

It sounds like the bride doesn't have kids. She probably doesn't realize that as soon as the food & drinks come out, that dress will be ruined. If by some miracle its not ruined, I'm sure she doesn't realize that you will have less than 1 year for your daughter to wear it again. Bridesmaids can keep their dresses for life & have many opportunities to wear it again, kids do not. Finally, she probably doesn't realize that there are other options out there. She probably has no idea that Sears & JCPenney sell great formal dresses for kids at reasonable prices. She was probably in a bridal shop & saw a bunch of flower girl dresses. She may have even picked the most reasonably priced one. Talk to your husband first (so you two are on the same page) and then talk to her.

I would first talk to my husband about how I feel because this is his connection. I would also search ebay, craigslist and other bridal shops for a comparable cheaper dress if not the same dress. If hubby agrees I would then present the information to the bride explaining the expense since both your husband and daughter is in the wedding. Best Wishes because I would have to say no to a $130 dress for a 3 year old.

Our flower girl (my neice, 10yo) wore an Easter dress on clearance for $17. I offered to pay for it, but my brother refused the offer. I also said she could have her hair however she wanted. I would reply that our budget for a dress is $__, while thanking for including your daughter in such a fun and momentous event. Good luck!

It is her wedding so respect her feelings and that she may have put a lot of thought into this dress. But if it is not in your budget then you absolutely need to talk with her about it. Perhaps she loves the dress so much she would be willing to foot the bill for it. Or perhaps it was a quick choice meaningless and she would be fine with finding a cheaper alternative. Either way you need to discuss it with her tactfully and carefully. I would not pay that for a dress. Some people might tho.

Flower girls dresses are the ones who attract the attention of others in a wedding. It's not a difficult job to make a cute looking girl look cute and sweet in a dress. But still it’s very important that you select the best infant flower girl dresses for your child.

Regards
http://www.prettyflowergirl.com

When I got married I paid for my flower girl's dress and rented the tux for the ring bearer. I absolutely think you should tell the bride that you cannot afford it at that price and then leave the ball in her court. Look around for comparables at a price you can afford and even go armed with photos of them when you talk with her. If she won't budge, then tell her that unfortunately your daughter won't be able to be the flower girl. Hopefully she will just offer to pay for it!

I would look for a seamstress to see if the dress could be copied. You may be able to find a pattern and fabric close to what the orginal dress looks like.
Print the picture of the dress and take it to a fabric store and see if you can find a simular pattern and fabric. The store associates should know a seamstress who could sew the dress for you.

YIKES! That is way too much for a dress (for an adult, let alone a 3 year old)! If I couldn't find some serious coupons and discounts, and couldn't find a very similar dress pre-owned on ebay, etc.... I would definitely ask. These are some tough economic times.... The bride should definitely understand. Good luck and keep us posted!

I told my aunt to find whatever dresses she liked for her twins, who were my flower girls. She has great taste and a nose for bargains, and she knew my color scheme, so I wasn't worried. I think I'd just tell the bride that while you were honored to be asked to be part of the wedding, the dress is just too expensive. Maybe the bride will choose a new dress at a lower price point. Or you could suggest shopping together around Easter/ first Communion time when the department stores have some fancier dresses. Don't forget checking out Craigslist. There are always flower girl dresses on there!